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But this... She put her arm around her waist.
“Okay, this is serious. I already offered to help you and I’m not going to let this go,” he said.
“Carter, thanks, but you can’t make that fear I feel when I strap on a pair of skis go away. I mean, you seem to be able to charm anyone into doing anything, but this is something I don’t think even you can simply force under your control.”
She dropped her arm as she realized how defensive that might look to him. Then she spun on her heel and started walking again. As she moved across the resort grounds, she paused to look around her. It was the kind of day she used to love. The snow was thick, perfect for a fresh run, and the sky looked clear and endless. This was her favorite sort of winter.
“I know that,” he said, quickly catching up with her. “I’m just saying every time I dare you to do something—”
“It backfires,” she retorted. The bet on a kiss that had started all of this hadn’t spurred her on to greater skiing glory. Or had it? She’d kept her head down and trained harder to prove he didn’t bother her. That his flirting couldn’t shake her. Maybe that was what she needed to do now. Put her head down and pretend he couldn’t affect her.
“I’ve got this.”
“You know,” he said, “it wouldn’t hurt you to admit that you can’t do it all on your own.”
“I don’t need an entourage to remind me— What is it exactly that they do for you?” she asked sweetly.
“Nothing. They are friends, not an entourage. Something that seems foreign to you.” He reached out and gripped her arm. “You have people who care for you, but you are always so afraid to let them in.”
“Let you in,” she said, jerking away. “That’s what you really mean.”
“True. Why is that?”
She stopped walking and looked over at him. He had put on a pair of sunglasses so she couldn’t see his eyes. “You scare me. You make me confused. I don’t really like it.”
“I don’t like it, either, but we are going to have to work together.”
“Why?” she asked.
“I’m the only person who knows you haven’t skied since your surgery, aren’t I?”
She nodded. When she got home she was taking that damned resolutions list off the fridge and adding “no drinking champagne” to it. Maybe if she hadn’t been drinking she wouldn’t have found him as attractive and confessed all sorts of things she should have kept to herself.
“Carter, please. Just let this go. I’ll figure it out and no one will have to know anything,” she said.
“I can’t.”
She sighed in frustration. “Why not?”
“Because you made me your New Year’s resolution and I’m determined to give you a year you won’t forget.”
“I was drunk when I said that,” she said. But despite her annoyance with him, his words made her feel warm like the sunshine on her face. There was more to Carter Shaw than she wanted to admit. Mainly because if she didn’t keep him at arm’s length she might do something foolish, like fall for him.
And it was foolish. Though she hadn’t seen him in person for the past two weeks, she’d seen him online on the gossip websites with a bevy of women at the Thunderbolt Energy Drink Extreme Winter Games as he’d promoted his upcoming professional debut in California. She knew that he was a player.
She had to seem like a novelty to him. And while she got that to him she was different, a challenge of sorts, how long would it take for that to wear off and for him to move on? She wasn’t being down on herself. She had plenty to offer a man, but not one like Carter. His expectations were based on a model of woman and a lifestyle that made hers seem boring.
“You weren’t drunk. If you want to pretend you were, then fine,” he said tersely. “I don’t know why I keep chasing after you.”
She didn’t know, either, and she wasn’t foolish enough to guess. “Thank you. I guess I’ll see you next week at our meeting.”
“Yes, you will.”
She walked away and admitted to herself that she was disappointed he’d let her go. She’d hoped that maybe he’d follow her. But she knew she’d have shut him down if he had.
She got changed in the locker room and, as usual, putting on her ski clothes brought out that little bit of sadness and fear. But she had a class to teach, and letting down her students wasn’t something she’d do.
Her first lesson went well, and instead of just holding her skis, this time she put them on and skied around a little bit while the kids met their parents for lunch. She was going to try to take a run after lunch.
The clock was ticking and she wasn’t about to let anyone else know her secret. It was time she conquered that fear and moved on. Then maybe she could figure out what to do about her attraction to Carter.
10 (#u15241939-5112-5a8a-81d2-1759ffb894ea)
LINDSEY SURVEYED HER TEAM. She had Bradley Hunt, Lars Usten, Stan Poirier from Thunderbolt and two other executives from other resorts in the area. She had been practicing sledding every day on her little snow mound, as well as getting used to standing at the top of a slope and going down.
But she was nowhere near as ready to take on a downhill race as she’d need to be if her team was going to win. Beating Carter was important to her. She needed it. He had seen her flustered and flawed and she wanted to wow him.
“Okay, team, welcome to our first practice. I thought we’d talk a little about the skills each of you has and then decide how to proceed.”
“I’ll go first,” Lars said. The former world champion still skied every day, and he was in pretty good shape despite a health scare back in November. “I’m probably the biggest liability on the team since my heart attack at Thanksgiving, but I want you all to know I’ve been skiing every day and my runs are getting faster and smoother.”
“I don’t think anyone doubted you, Lars,” she reassured him. “I’ve always been in awe of your control while you’re on skis.”
“Thank you, Lindsey. Coming from you, that’s a compliment I’ll treasure,” he said with a smile.
He reminded her of her grandfather in a lot of ways. Except hers didn’t really like to ski. Lars was the kind of grandfather she would like to have.
“I’m more into sponsoring crazy athletes than actually doing the crazy stuff myself.”
“Sponsoring athletes is what you are good at,” Lindsey said.
“I’ve already sent an email to the committee agreeing to that.” Bradley grinned. “Oh, and by the way, I have a feeling my wife is going to want to compete against me.”
Lindsey rolled her eyes. “That would hardly be fair, since you just started skiing.”
“I know. I think that’s why she keen on it,” Bradley said with a laugh.
Clearing his throat, Stan added, “My wife, Georgina, is better than I am. She might want to go against someone like you, Lars.”
“This is all good to get out in the open, but let’s face it, we have to train to do our best times,” Lindsey informed the group. “Now, I suspect that Carter is going to want to go down on his snowboard, and I think the committee has agreed to let him. Does anyone else snowboard?” Tim and Paul raised their hands. She talked to them briefly, but frankly she didn’t snowboard so couldn’t really “coach” them.
Bradley left to take a call, and during the hour-long practice that followed, Lindsey spent most of her time writing down the times of the others and waiting for them to finish with various business calls. It was obvious this wasn’t going to be like training for an international event.
In addition to practicing, they’d sell tickets to the event, and each member of the team was to fund-raise. The group was breaking up when Bradley returned. Whistling under his breath, he was obviously in a good mood. Lindsey wished she felt the same. She was upset with herself that she hadn’t taken a run. Deep down she wasn’t even sure she could do it, but she knew she was going to have to. Either that or admit to everyone in this microcosm that she wasn’t the skier she used to be.
“Hey, I just got off the phone with a college buddy of mine who is an orthopedic surgeon for the military,” Bradley announced. “He mentioned that some of the vets who’ve been wounded overseas and lost limbs have a winter sports team.” He paused. “I was wondering what your thoughts were about getting them involved. He gave me the number of their team captain.”
“I love this idea,” Lindsey said.
Everyone else agreed, too, so Bradley sent a group email to the other committee members.
“Once we get everyone’s acceptance, maybe you could liaise with him, Lindsey?” Lars asked. “I think we’ve all proved you can take the executive out of his office but you can’t make him stop working.”
She laughed, as she was sure he’d intended. “No problem. I have time between classes to make a few calls.”
“Perfect. Let’s meet back here next week, and if anyone needs any pointers or one-on-one coaching, I’m available.”
The group left, and she walked to her office at the back of the ski rental office aware of the fact that she was a total fraud. She wondered how she was going to get over this. How was she going to make herself ski when it was the last thing she thought she could do?
Right now, sitting in her office, looking up at the mountain, she felt dread and fear. She should just confess and stop trying to be something she used to be.
“Knock, knock,” Carter said from the doorway. “Got a minute?”
Definitely. Her breath hitched as their eyes met and held. She’d rather spar with him than dwell on her own inadequacies. “Sure. Come to tell me that your team isn’t up to snuff? Mine is great.”
“Ha. Mine is pretty good, too. Elizabeth can really ski, and I was surprised that Georgina could, as well. Don’t tell either of them. It’s just that they never talked about skiing.”
“I know what you mean. I’ve got two snowboarders and I’m not really sure how to handle them. But they are pretty good. Not you good, of course, but still, they’ve got some skills.”
“It’s hard to be as good as me,” he said with that big sexy grin of his.
A shiver of awareness skittered down her spine as she gazed into his blue-gray eyes. It had been days since she’d been alone with him, and instead it felt like years. Everything about him turned her on. His disheveled hair, his baggy snowboarding pants, the spicy scent of his aftershave. New Year’s Eve had whetted her appetite, and she wanted more of Carter Shaw. And right now flirting and playing with him felt safe.
* * *
CARTER FOUND IT harder and harder to keep up the casual pretense he’d cultivated around Lindsey. He missed her. He physically ached for her and wanted to do whatever he could to get her back into his bed, but she was setting the limits, and right now that meant taking it slow.
Sitting in the small office and smiling when what he really wanted to do was to pull her into his arms, run his fingers through her long, silky blond hair and kiss her until she was panting. But that wasn’t going to happen. He was pursuing her but didn’t want her to know it. He needed to keep up appearances. And that was exactly what he intended to do.
“It is hard to be as big as your ego,” she said glibly. “I wish I had a tenth of it.”
“What do you need it for?”
“I have to ski at our event in the middle of February, Carter. I haven’t done anything but slide down a mound of snow since I crashed last year in Sochi. What am I going to do?” she asked.
Looking as though she had the weight of the world on her shoulders, she walked around her desk and sat on the edge of it, right in front of him. He saw a hint of vulnerability in her eyes. She needed him. It felt good. Stroked his ego. And she’d probably never let him live it down if he let her know.
“Take a run with me.”
“I don’t even know if I can. You saw me on the snow pile. I was shaking like an idiot up there. If I was on skis—”
“I’ve got an idea,” he said.
“I doubt it would work.”
“My last one did,” he said, bragging just a little, but also making a challenge out of it. He knew how she was. She’d rise to the challenge.
Lindsey sighed impatiently. “Fine. What’s your idea?”
“Just a ride down the mountain in a toboggan.”
“I don’t know.”
“I’ll be with you,” he said gently. “You know, like I was at the snow mound.”
She watched him with wary eyes, and he ached that she had lost her faith in herself. He vowed he’d do whatever he had to do to help her get it back.
“Would we go here at the lodge?” she asked.
“Yes. We could even say we are checking it out for an event for our nonskiers. I’ve got two of them.”
“I didn’t get one. Maybe we can swap one of my snowboarders for your nonskier. It’s always weird to me when people live and work this near the Wasatch Range and they don’t ski.”
“Me, too,” he admitted. “I can see it in Cali because there are so many other sports that people can do, but here? It’s pretty much ski or snowboard. Or, at the very least, ice skate. Speaking of which...you ever try that?”
She shook her head. “I’m not that good at it. Plus, my coach used to like me to focus on my sport.”
“Good idea. My coach said something similar but I did it anyway.”
“Rebel.”
“You know it,” he said.
Lindsey bit her lip, then turned to stare out the window before finally looking back over at him. “I wish I had your courage.”
“You do have it. But in your own way. You are a rebel when you need to be. I’ve seen you when you pass through the gates for the downhill. You look very fierce.”
He had never mentioned it, but the first time he’d noticed Lindsey was after her run. She’d broken the world-record time. He’d been so turned on by her he hadn’t known what to do. She hadn’t been his kind of woman, but then suddenly his body had been, like, hell yeah, she is.
“Thank you, Carter. You know, for an egomaniac, you say some really nice things,” she said, tipping her head to the side to study him.
“I’m not as ego driven as you think I am.”
“Really? You’re not going to convince me.” She checked her watch. “But I can probably take off in about an hour if you want to try the tobogganing idea.”
“Great.” He was shameless where she was concerned, using her love of skiing and her need to be back on her skis as a way to keep him by her side. He wondered if she would still be talking to him after their night together if it wasn’t for the fact that she couldn’t get back on her skis.
It was humbling, and he didn’t like the way it made him feel, so he treated those feelings the way he usually did. He shoved them so far down he could pretend they didn’t exist.
“I’ll go to the concierge and make sure we can get on there and then come back in an hour,” he said. It would probably be a good idea to give her some space so she could miss him.
“Okay. Thanks, Carter,” she said.
“For?”
“Just being a friend.”
Friend. Ugh. He wasn’t about to let her relegate him there. Glancing over his shoulder to make sure no one was nearby, he closed the gap between them and pulled her into his arms. Then he gave her a hot, hard kiss. “We’re more than friends, gorgeous, and don’t you forget it.”
