The Girl Wanted: A Book of Friendly Thoughts

"Arriving at the office, I greeted the book-keeper with some passing remark, that for the life of me I could not have made under different conditions, I am not naturally witty; it immediately put Energy and determination have done wonders many a time. – Dickens. us on a pleasant footing for the day; she had caught the reflection. The president of the company I was employed by was a very busy man and much worried over his affairs, and at some remark that he made about my work I would ordinarily have felt quite hurt (being too The finest qualities of our nature, like the bloom on fruits, can be preserved only by the most delicate handling. – Thoreau. sensitive by nature and education); but this day I had determined nothing should mar its brightness, so replied to him cheerfully. His brow cleared, and there was another pleasant footing established, and so throughout the day I went, allowing no cloud to spoil its beauty for me or others about me. At the Discretion of speech is more than eloquence: and to speak agreeably to him with whom we deal is more than to speak in good words or in good order. – F. Bacon. kind home where I was staying the same course was pursued, and, where before I had felt estrangement and want of sympathy, I found congeniality and warm friendship. People will meet you half-way if you will take the trouble to go that far.

"So, my sisters, if you think the world is not treating you kindly don’t delay a day, but say to yourselves: ’I am going to keep young in spite of my gray hairs; Bread of flour is good: but there is bread, sweet as honey, if we would eat it, in a good book. – John Ruskin. even if things do not always come my way I am going to live for others, and shed sunshine across the pathway of all I meet.’ You will find happiness springing up like flowers around you, will never want for friends or companionship, and above all the peace of God will rest upon your soul."

What is wrong to-day won’t be right to-morrow. – Dutch Proverb. And all of this was brought about by a change in the attitude of the mind and a determination to look upon the sunshiny, rather than the dark, side of life. We can all do as much. It is for us to say whether we will be happy and make others happy, or whether we shall be distressed and thereby distress others.

We are only so far worthy of esteem as we know how to appreciate. – Goethe. What sort of girl are you going to be? Are you going to make the world glad or sorry that you are in it? Why don’t you decide, as you read these lines, as did Emory Belle when starting to her work that morning, that you will try to carry sunshine and not gloom into the lives of all you meet? Let us hope that there is no great reform in this matter to be worked in your life; but that you have ever been a joy-bringer and not a gloom-maker.

Therefore let us look well to the We are grateful that abundant life lies waiting in the heart of winter, and there is no condition where life is not. – Isabel Goodhue. attitude of mind and our habit of looking at things. One of our careful students of human attributes tells us – and the truth of which we all know – "that there is nothing surer than that we go and grow in just that direction in which our mind is most firmly fixed. Hoarding money absorbs the whole time and mind of the miser; how to scatter it is the chief thought of the spendthrift. Our daily Wishing will bring things in the degree that it incites you to go after them. – Muriel Strode. actions, and their result on our lives, are the effect of a cause – and that cause is invariably our previous thought. What you think most of to-day will be most likely what you will repeat to-morrow. Therefore it is of the utmost It is impossible to estimate the power for good of a bright, glad shining face. Of all the lights you carry on your face Joy shines farthest out to sea. – Anonymous. importance that we begin to think as deeply as possible on just those things that build us up. Half the work is already done if we can only concentrate our minds on that which we desire to do. It is the mind that drags us either up or down. Where that leads we follow.

No one in this world of ours ever became great by echoing the voice of another, repeating what that other has said. – J. C. Van Dyke. The power of direction is with us, but we cannot send our mind in one direction and then take the opposite road ourselves. Therefore, whether we are moving upward or downward in the scale of life depends on whether we are thinking up or thinking down. This is a truth that every person’s experience will prove to his own One fault mender equals twenty faultfinders. – Earl M. Pratt. satisfaction. Thought impels action, action forms habit, and habit rules our lives. So that no matter what direction we may wish to take, up or down, it is only necessary for us to fix our mind in the desired direction."

Let us then, be what we are, speak what we think, and in all things keep ourselves loyal to truth. – Longfellow. So let us pause and take an account of stock and ascertain whether we are thinking ourselves up or down, whether we are building truthfully or falsely, whether we are going forward or backward,

JUST THIS MINUTEIf we’re thoughtful, just this minute,In whate’er we say or do;If we put a purpose in itThat is honest, through and through,We shall gladden life and give itGrace to make it all sublime;For, though life is long, we live itJust this minute at a time.

There are some people whose smile, the sound of whose voice, whose very presence, seems like a ray of sunshine, to turn everything they touch into gold. – Lord Avebury.

Just this minute we are goingToward the right or toward the wrong,Just this minute we are sowingSeeds of sorrow or of song.Just this minute we are thinkingOn the ways that lead to God,Or in idle dreams are sinkingTo the level of the clod.Yesterday is gone, to-morrowNever comes within our grasp;Just this minute’s joy or sorrow,That is all our hands may clasp.Just this minute! Let us take itAs a pearl of precious price,And with high endeavor make itFit to shine in paradise.

It is work which gives flavor to life. Mere existence without object and without effort is a poor thing. Idleness leads to languor, and languor to disgust. – Amiel. One who finds joy in the doing of things can work more easily and steadily than one who works unwillingly and unhappily. Good nature is a lubricant for all the wheels of life. It changes the leaden feet of duty into the airy wings of opportunity, it not only brings happiness but that almost necessary adjunct of happiness, – health.

"In the maintenance of health and the cure of disease," says Dr. A. J. How poor are they who have only money to give! – John Lancaster Spalding. Sanderson, "cheerfulness is a most important factor. Its power to do good like a medicine is not an artificial stimulation of the tissues, to be followed by reaction and greater waste, as is the case with many drugs; but the effect of cheerfulness is Fear begets fear. – A. E. Winship. an actual life-giving influence through a normal channel the results of which reach every part of the system. It brightens the eye, makes ruddy the countenance, brings elasticity to the step, and promotes all the inner forces by which life is sustained. The blood circulates more freely, the oxygen comes to its home in the tissues, health is promoted, and disease is banished."

When we note how generally the What an absurd thing it is to pass over all the valuable parts of a man and fix our attention on his infirmities! – Addison. members of the medical profession ascribe to cheerfulness the very highest of health-giving powers, we are led to think that the wise words quoted above possess a foundation of scientific fact. "Faith, hope and love," says Charles G. Ames, "are purifiers of the blood. They have a peptic quality. They open and enlarge all the channels of bodily vitality. As was learned long ago, ’A There can be no true rest without work and the full delight of a holiday cannot be known except by the man who has earned it. – Hugh Black. merry heart doeth good like a medicine.’ And the self-control which keeps reason on the throne and makes passion serve is the best of all domestic physicians."

So the girl who would go down the paths of sunshine will put joy and enthusiasm into her work and into her play. She will practice her music The more we do the more we can do; the more busy we are the more leisure we have. – Hazlitt. lesson, take up her studies at school, assist in performing the household duties, and in doing the many tasks that come to her hands in a joyous, whole-hearted manner.

In so doing she will make a Lost – a golden hour, set with sixty diamond minutes. There is no reward, for it is gone forever. – Beecher. pleasure of that which, with dull complaining, would be a drag and a distress. By this cheerful attitude of mind she will be able to mold all things to her will and, better still, she will be able to mold her will to her highest ideal of splendid womanhood. For none can doubt that man Good company and good conversation are the sinews of virtue. – Stephen Allen. is the architect of his own fortune, to a very great extent. He is even more than that, he is of his own self

THE SCULPTORI am the sculptor: I, myself, the clay,Of which I am to fashion, as I will,In deed and in desire, day by day,The pattern of my purpose, good or ill.In breathless bronze nor the insensate stoneMust my enduring passion find its goal;Within the living statue I enthroneThat essence of eternity, the soul.

A triumph is the closing scene of a contest. – A. E. Winship.

Nor space nor time that soul of yearning bars;It flashes to the zenith of the sky,And dwelling mid the mystery of the stars,Aspires to answer the Eternal Why.It loves the pleasing note of lute and lyre,The lily’s purple, the red rose’s glow;It wonders at the witchery of the fire,And marvels at the magic of the snow.

Don’t forget that the man who can but doesn’t must give place to the man who can’t but tries. – Comtelburo.

"Who taught," it asks, "the ant to build her nest?The bee her cells? the hermit thrush to sing?The dove to plume his iridescent breast?The butterfly to paint his gorgeous wing?"The spider how to spin so wondrous wise?The nautilus to form his chambered shell?The carrier-pigeon under alien skies,Who taught him how his homeward course to tell?"By force or favor it would win from fateThe sacred secret of the blood and breath:Learn all the hidden springs of love and hate,And gain dominion over life and death.

Advise well before you begin, and when you have maturely considered, then act with promptitude. – Sallust.

In every feature of this sculptured faceOf spirit and of substance, I must moldThe shining symbol of a grander grace;The hope toward which the centuries have rolled.Oh, hands of mine that the unnumbered yearsEvolved from hoof and wing and claw and fin,’T is ours to bring from out the stress and tears,A godlike figure fashioned from within.

CHAPTER IV

SOME EVERY-DAY VIRTUES

I would rather be right than president!" Each, whatever his estate, in his own unconscious breast bears the talisman of fate. – John Townsend Trowbridge.

At first thought those words seem to be the declaration of an unusually upright and conscientious person. But let us study them a little more deeply and closely.

When a man has not a good reason for doing a thing, he has one good reason for letting it alone. – Thomas Scott. The desire to do right and to deserve the approbation of all good people is very strong in every human breast. Not until a man has lost his moral sense of values would he trade his integrity and self-respect for any other gift the world could offer. This being true, who among us would care to be president if in order to occupy that exalted position he must be obviously in the wrong?

Once a body laughs he cannot be angry more. – James M. Barrie. Thus we see that after all is said and done, the one great prize for which we all aspire is the love and good will of our friends and of the world. For no matter Success is usually the result of a sharpened sense of what is wanted. – Frank Moore Colby. how much of wealth and fame may come to us, without the love and respect of our fellow beings we must ever remain poor and friendless.

He is the richest who deserves the most friends. Wealth is a matter of the He that falls in love with himself, will have no rivals. – Benjamin Franklin. heart and not of the pocket. A thousand slaves piling up wealth for their master cannot make him rich. It is not that which others do for us that makes us possessors of great wealth, but that which we do for others. All true riches are self made. Only when the hand and the heart are put into one’s work does it yield a lasting worth. In the final true analysis the picture forever belongs to the painter who paints it; the poem to the poet who writes it; the loaf of bread to the toiler who earns it. Wealth may acquire these things but it cannot own them.

A sinful heart makes a feeble hand. – Walter Scott. Therefore the true value of character is something that each must achieve for himself. It cannot be bought; it cannot be bequeathed to us; it must be earned by each individual who would possess it. Hence it is that these great riches may be acquired by all who desire to possess them.

Look within, for you have a lasting foundation of happiness at home that will always bubble up if you will but dig for it. – Marcus Aurelius Antoninus. Where are they to be found? Right here.

When may we obtain them? Right now.

Do you care to learn the only way in which you can come into possession of them? "Whoever you are – wise or foolish, rich or poor," says Rebecca Harding Davis, "God sent you into His To a friend’s house the road is never long. – Danish Proverb. world, as He sent every other human being, to help the men and women in it, to make them happier and better. If you do not do that, no matter what your powers may be, you are mere lumber, a worthless bit of world’s furniture. A Stradivarius, if it hangs dusty and dumb upon the wall, is not of as much real value as a kitchen poker which is used."

Honest toil is holy service; faithful work is praise and prayer. – Henry Van Dyke. So we learn that it is the fine practical spirit, content and willing to do the humble things which are possible of achievement that is doing most to lift the world to a higher and better plane. "Have you never met humble men and Give me the toiler’s joy who has seen the sunlight burst on the distant turrets in the land of his desire. – Muriel Strode. women," asks Gannett, "who read little, who knew little, yet who had a certain fascination as of fineness lurking about them? Know them, and you are likely to find them persons who have put so much thought and honesty and conscientious trying into their common work – it may be sweeping rooms, or planing You can buy a lot of happiness with a mighty small salary, but fashionable happiness always costs just a little more than you’re making. – George Horace Lorimer. boards, or painting walls – have put their ideals so long, so constantly, so lovingly into that common work of theirs, that finally these qualities have come to permeate not their work only, but so much of their being, that they are fine-fibred within, even if on the outside the rough bark clings."

If we are wisely introspective, we must reach the conclusion that humble though we may be, we are after all, a A tart temper never mellows with age, and a sharp tongue is the only edged tool that grows keener with constant use. – Washington Irving. component part of the great expression of being, and that we are well worth while. Then if we are worth while, it follows that all we do is worth while, for each of us is, in the end, the sum of all the things he has done. Once we have this idea that everything stands for something more than the mere thing itself – that it is correlated in its influences with all the other things that we and all others are doing, we shall invest all our tasks, little and big, with more of purpose and importance. Emerson says:

"There is no end to the sufficiency of character. It can afford to wait; it can Where there is one man who squints with his eyes, there are a dozen who squint with their brains. – Oliver Wendell Holmes. do without what it calls success; it cannot but succeed. To a well-principled man existence is victory. He defends himself against failure in his main design by making every inch of the road to it pleasant. There is no trifle and no obscurity to him: he feels the immensity of the chain whose last link he holds in his hand, and is led by it."

When a true genius appears in the world you may know him by this sign, that the dunces are all in confederacy against him. – Jonathan Swift. Perhaps no other every-day virtue counts for so much in the general welfare of the world as the adapting of one’s self to, and the making the most of, one’s immediate surroundings. It is in the hundreds of little, unrecorded deeds of kindness and goodness that we lay the foundations of character. And because these humble lives, that mean so much to the other humble lives with which they What we have got to do is to keep up our spirits and be neighborly. We shall come all right in the end, never fear. – Dickens. come into touch, are never specifically named and shouted by the multitudinous tongues of type, that many fail to see in them the elements of true and noble achievement with which they are crowned. "The most inspiring tales," it has been truly said, "are those that have not been written; the most heroic deeds are those that have not been told; the world’s greatest successes have been Happiness is the feeling we experience when we are too busy to be miserable. – Thomas L. Masson. won in the quiet of men’s hearts, the noblest heroes are the countless thousands who have struggled and triumphed, rising on stepping-stones of their dead selves to higher things."

Since it is these humbler every-day virtues that one is called upon oftenest to exercise, or to neglect, it is apparent Duty is the sublimest word in the English language. – Gen. Robert E. Lee. that the one who possesses the most of them and who cultivates them the most earnestly has the greatest number of opportunities of winning the admiration of others. It is of a girl possessing this fine adaptability to the world’s workaday surroundings that "Amber" draws this pen-picture: "Shall I tell the kind of girl Optimism is the faith that leads to achievement; nothing can be done without hope. – Keller. that I especially adore? Well, first of all, let us take the working girl. She is not a ’lady’ in the acceptance of the term as it is employed by many members of this latter day’s hybrid democracy. She is just a blithe, cheery, sweet-tempered The activity and soundness of a man’s actions will be determined by the activity and soundness of his thoughts. – Beecher. young woman. She may have a father rich enough to support her at home, but for all that she is a working girl. She is never idle. She is studying or sewing or helping about the home part of the day. She is romping or playing or swinging out of doors the other part. She is never What men want is not talent, it is purpose; not the power to achieve, but the will to labor. – Bulwer Lytton. frowsy or untidy or lazy. She is never rude or slangy or bold. And yet she is always full of fun and ready for frolic. She does not depend upon a servant to do what she can do for herself. She is considerate toward all who serve her. She is reverent to the old and thoughtful of the feeble. She never criticises when criticism can wound, and she is ready with a helpful, loving word for every one. Sometimes she has no father, or her parents are too poor to support her. Then she goes out and earns her living by whatever her hands find to do. She clerks in a store, or she counts out change at a cashier’s desk, or she teaches school, or she clicks a typewriter, or rather a telegrapher’s key, but We judge ourselves by what we feel capable of doing, while others judge us by what we have already done. – Longfellow. always and everywhere she is modest and willing and sweet.

"She has too much dignity to be imposed upon, or put to open affront, but she has humility also, and purity that differs from prudishness as a dove The great hope of society is individual character. – Channing. in the air differs from a stuffed bird in a showcase. She is quick to apologize when she knows she is in the wrong, yet no young queen ever carried a higher head than she can upon justifiable occasions. She Concentrate all your thought upon the work in hand. The sun’s rays do not burn until brought to a focus. – Alexander G. Bell. is not always imagining herself looked down upon because she is poor. She knows full well that out of her own heart and mouth proceed the only witnesses that can absolve or condemn her. If she is quick to be courteous, unselfish, gentle and retiring in speech and manner in Associate with men of good quality if you esteem your reputation, for it is better to be alone than in bad company. – George Washington. public places, she is true gold, even though her dress be faded and her hat a little out of style. You cannot mistake any such girl any more than you can mistake the sunshine that follows the rain or the lark that springs from the hawthorne hedge. All things that are blooming and sweet attend her! The earth is better for her passing through it and heaven will be fairer for her habitation therein."

How fortunate it is for us who would practice these little every-day virtues that we do not have to wait for some noted person at some remote time to tell the world that we are striving in our own humble way to be kind and thoughtful. There is some one within the sound of our voice and within the reach of our hand who will be glad to testify to our goodness.

Kindness is never shown in vain.

The public school playground transposes many a boy from a public liability to a public asset. – A. E. Winship. The gift blesses the giver, even though the one receiving the gift is ungrateful. Consciously or unconsciously we exert an influence upon all who come within the zone of our being. Surely those who know us best ought to be the ones to appreciate Real coolness and self-possession are the indispensable accompaniments of a great mind. – Dickens. us the most intelligently. If we are lovable, will they not love us? If we love them, will it not serve to make them lovable? Let us not keep the nice little attentions and the carefully selected words for the stranger and the passer-by, but have as much regard for the ones of our own intimate family circle. One of the crying needs of society is the revival of gentleness and of a refined considerateness in judging others. – Newell D. Hillis. We should be happy to do most for them who do most for us. One of our students of human happiness says to us: "Get into the way of idealizing what you have; let the picturesqueness of your own imagination play round the village where you do live, instead of the one where you wish to live; weave a romance round the brother you have got, instead In this world inclination to do things is of more importance than the mere power. – Chapin. of round the Prince Perfect of a husband whom you have not got." And Marcus Aurelius says: "Think not so much of what thou hast not, as of what thou hast; but of the things which thou hast, select the best, and then reflect how eagerly they would have been sought if thou had’st them not."

Character lives in a man, reputation outside of him. – J. G. Holland. Culture, itself, is but a composite expression of our simple, every-day virtues. It must be measured by its outward manifestation of regard for the pleasure, Self-confidence is the first requisite to great undertakings. – Johnson. happiness and advancement of others. Literary culture will open up the windows of the soul that the light of virtue from within may shine forth and dispel the darkness of vice with which it comes in contact. "Unless one’s knowledge of good books – his literary scholarship – has Patience is a necessary ingredient of genius. – Disraeli. so taken hold upon him as to make him exemplary, in a large measure, he cannot be said to be cultured," says one of our students of higher ethics. "His learning should cultivate a choice and beautiful address, a cheerful and loving countenance, a magnificent and spirited carriage, a refinement of manner, an agreeable presence."

The extent to which we may feel a sense of peaceful satisfaction at the end of a day, depends upon how we have lived that day. We soon learn that the day means most for us in which we do most for others. If we have lived for self alone, it has been