The Girl Wanted: A Book of Friendly Thoughts

We shall bring each lonely life a smile,But what have we brought to-day?We shall give to truth a grander birth,And to steadfast faith a deeper worth,We shall feed the hungering souls of earth;But whom have we fed to-day?

No man can rest who has nothing to do. – Sam Walter Foss.

We shall reap such joys in the by and by,But what have we sown to-day?We shall build us mansions in the sky,But what have we built to-day?’T is sweet in idle dreams to bask,But here and now do we do our task?Yes, this is the thing our souls must ask,"What have we done to-day?"

Among the every-day accomplishments which everyone should wish to possess is a knowledge of the fine art of smiling. To know how and when to smile, not too much and not too little, is a fine mental and social possession.

Work is no disgrace but idleness is. – Hesiod. Hawthorne says: "If I value myself on anything it is on having a smile that children love." Any one possessing a smile that children as well as others may love is to be congratulated. A pleasant, smiling face is of great worth to its possessor and to the world that is privileged to look upon it.

Shoddy work is not only a wrong to a man’s own personal integrity, hurting his character; but also it is a wrong to society. Truthfulness in work is as much demanded as truthfulness in speech. – Hugh Black. A smile is an indication that the one who is smiling is happy and every happy person helps to make every one else happy. Yet we all understand that happiness does not mean smiling all the time. There is truly nothing more distressing than a giggler or one who is forever grimacing. "True happiness," says one of our most cheerful writers, "means the joyous sparkle in the eye and the The flowering of civilization is in the finished man, the man of sense, of grace, of accomplishment, of social power – the gentleman. – Ralph Waldo Emerson. little, smiling lines in the face that are so quickly and easily distinguished from the lines produced by depression and frowning that grow deeper and deeper until they become as hard and severe as if they were cut in stone." Such happiness is one of the virtues which people of all classes and ages, the world over, admire and enjoy. "We do not know what ripples of healing are set in motion," It is all very well to growl at the cold-heartedness of the world, but which of us can truthfully say that he has done as much for others as others have done for him? – Patrick Flynn. says Henry Drummond, "when we simply smile on one another. Christianity wants nothing so much in the world as sunny people."

Most persons are very quick to see whether or not a smile is genuine or is manufactured and put on like a mask for the occasion. The automatic, stock-in-trade smile hardly ever fits the face that tries to wear it. It is a little too wide or sags at the corners or something else is wrong A man is relieved and gay when he has put his heart into his work, and done his best; but what he has said or done otherwise, shall give him no peace. – Emerson. with it.

A smile may be as deep as a well and as wide as a church door; it may be "sweeter than honey," but the instant we detect that it is not genuine, it loses its charm and becomes, in fact, much worse than no smile at all. Smiles that are genuine are always just right both in quality and quantity. So the only really safe rule is for us not to smile until we feel like it and then we shall get on all right. And we ought to feel like smiling Some people meet us like the mountain air and thrill our souls with freshness and delight. – Nathan Haskell Dole. whenever we look into the honest face of any fellow being. A smile passes current in every country as a mark of distinction.

But it is even possible to overdo in the matter of smiling. "I can’t think of anything more irritating to the average human being," says Lydia Horton Knowles, "than an incessant, everlasting smile. There are people who have it. When things go wrong they have a patient, martyr-like smile, and when things go right they have a dutifully pleasant smile which has all the appearance of being I let the willing winter bring his jeweled buds of frost and snow. – Edward Francis Burns. mechanical, and purely a pose. Now I think the really intelligent person is the one who can look as though he realized the significance of various incidents or happenings and who can look sorrowful, even, if the occasion demands it. It is not a pleasant thing The world is unfinished; let’s mold it a bit. – Sam Walter Foss. to suffer mentally or physically, for instance, and have any one come up to you with a smile of patient, sweet condolence. The average man or woman does not want smiles when he or she is uncomfortable. We are apt to remember that it is easy enough to smile when it is somebody else who has the pain. I venture to say that a smile given at the wrong moment is far more Our wishes are presentiments of the capabilities which lie within us and harbingers of that which we shall be in a condition to perform. – Goethe. dangerous to human happiness than the lack of a smile at any given psychological moment. There is a time and a place for all things, even a smile."

No expression of feeling is of much moment without a warm heart and an Do not let us overlook the wayside flowers. – Joe Mitchell Chapple. intelligent thought behind it. The seemingly mechanical, automatic expressions of feeling and of interest in our affairs are sometimes even harder to bear than an out and out attitude of indifference. The thing that really warms and moves us is a touch of heartfelt, intelligent

SYMPATHY

Quiet minds cannot be perplexed or frightened, but go on in fortune or misfortune at their own private pace, like a clock during a thunderstorm. – R. L. Stevenson.

When the clouds begin to lower,That’s a splendid time to smile;But your smile will lose its powerIf you’re smiling all the while.Now and then a sober season,Now and then a jolly laugh:We like best, and there’s a reason,A good, wholesome half and half.

The wealth of a man is the number of things which he loves and blesses, and by which he is loved and blessed. – Carlyle.

When the other one has trouble,We should feel that trouble, too,For, were we with joy to bubble’Mid his grief, ’t would hardly do.Let us own that keen discerningThat can see and bear a part;For the whole wide world is yearningFor a sympathetic heart.

Nothing is more restful and refreshing than a friendly glance or a kindly word offered to us in the midst of our daily rounds of duty. And since we are not The stoical scheme of supplying our wants by lopping off our desires is like cutting off our feet when we want shoes. – Jonathan Swift. often in a position to grant great favors we should not fail to cultivate the habit of bestowing small ones whenever we can. It is in giving the many little lifts along the way that we shall be able to lighten many burdens.

I do not know it to be a fact, but I have read it somewhere in the books that the human heart rests nine hours out of every twenty-four. It manages to steal little bits of rest between beats, and thus it is ever refreshed and able to go on performing the work nature has assigned for it to do.

Whatever is worth doing at all, is worth doing well. – Lord Chesterfield. And therein is a first-rate lesson for most persons, who if they cannot do something of considerable moment are disposed to do nothing at all. They forget Indulge not in vain regrets for the past, in vainer resolves for the future – act, act in the present. – F. W. Robertson. that it is the brief three-minute rests that enable the mountain-climber to press on till he reaches the top whereas longer periods of inactivity might serve to stiffen his limbs and impede his progress.

Wise are they who, like the human heart, sprinkle rest and kindness and heart’s-ease all through their daily tasks. They weave a bright thread of thankful happiness through the web The past cannot be changed. The future is yet in our power. – Hugh White. and woof of life’s pattern. They are never too busy to say a kind word or to do a gentle deed. They may be compelled to sigh betimes, but amid their sighs are smiles that drive away the cares. They find sunbeams scattered in the trail of every cloud. They gather flowers where others see nothing but weeds. They pluck little sprigs of rest where others find only thorns of distress.

The man who cannot be practical and mix his religion with his business is either in the wrong religion or in the wrong business. – Patrick Flynn. After the manner of the human heart, they make much of the little opportunities presented to them. They rest that they may have strength for others. They gather sunshine with which to dispel the shadows about them.

The I don’t think there is a pleasure in the world that can be compared with an honest joy in conquering a difficult task. – Margaret E. Sangster. grandest conception of life is to esteem it as an opportunity for making others happy. He who is most true to his higher self is truest to the race. The lamp that shines brightest gives the most light to all about it. Thoreau says: "To enjoy a thing exclusively is commonly to exclude yourself from the true enjoyment of life."

Every right action and true thought sets the seal of its beauty on every person’s face; every wrong action and foul thought its seal of distortion. – Ruskin. He is, indeed, a correct observer and a careful student of human nature who tells us that the face is such an index of character that the very growth of the latter can be traced upon the former, and most of the successive lines that carve the furrowed face of age out of the smooth outline of childhood are engraved directly or indirectly by mind. There is no beautifier of the face like a beautiful spirit.

Those who bring sunshine to the lives of others cannot keep it from themselves. – J. M. Barrie. So we see that if we have acquired the habit of wearing a pleasant face, or of smiling honestly and cheerfully, we have an accomplishment that is worth more than many others that are more pretentious and more superficial. If to this accomplishment we can add another – the ability to speak a pleasant word to those whom we may meet – we are not to think poorly of our equipment for life.

There is a good, old-fashioned word in the dictionary, the study of which, with its definition, is well worth our while. Politeness is like an air cushion; there may be nothing in it, but it eases the jolts wonderfully. – George Eliot. The word is "Complaisance," and it is defined as "the disposition, action, or habit of being agreeable, or conforming to the views, wishes, or convenience of others; desire or endeavor to please; courtesy; politeness."

Complaisance, as it has been truly said, renders a superior amiable, an equal agreeable, an inferior acceptable. It Sloth makes all things difficult, but industry all things easy. – Benjamin Franklin. sweetens conversation; it produces good-nature and mutual benevolence; it encourages the timid, soothes the turbulent, humanizes the fierce, and distinguishes a society of civilized persons from a confusion of savages.

Action may not always bring happiness; but there is no happiness without action. – Disraeli. Politeness has been defined as society’s method of making things run smoothly. True complaisance is a more intimate quality. It is an impulse to seek points of agreement with others. A spirit of welcome, whether to strangers, or to new suggestions, untried pleasures, fresh impressions. It never is satisfied to remain inactive as long as there is anybody to please or to make more comfortable.

The complaisant person need not be lacking in will, in determination, or individuality. In fact it is the complaisant We would willingly have others perfect and yet we amend not our own faults. – Thomas à Kempis. person’s strength of will that holds in check and harmonizes all the other traits of character and moulds them into a perfectly balanced disposition.

Complaisance rounds off the sharp corners, chooses softer and gentler words and makes it easy and pleasant for all to dwell together in unity. And it never fails to contribute something to The most manifold sign of wisdom is continued cheer. – Montaigne. the enjoyment of everyone even though it be

ONLY A WORD

There is only one cure for public distress – and that is public education, directed to make men thoughtful, merciful, and just. – Ruskin.

Tell me something that will beJoy through all the years to me.Let my heart forever holdOne divinest grain of gold.Just a simple little word,Yet the dearest ever heard;Something that will bring me restWhen the world seems all distressed.

To believe a business impossible is the way to make it so. – Wade.

As the candle in the nightSends abroad its cheerful light,So a little word may beLike a lighthouse in the sea.When the winds and waves of lifeFill the breast with storm and strife,Just one star my boat may guideTo the harbor, glorified.

CHAPTER III

THE JOY OF DOING

What I must do is all that concerns me, not what the people think. – Emerson. Half-way, half-hearted doings never amount to much. Battles are not won with flags at half-mast. No, they are run up to the very tops of their standards and are waved as far toward the heavens as is possible.

Gentle words, quiet words, are, after all, the most powerful words. – Washington Gladden. If we lack enthusiasm we are almost as certain to fail of achieving an end as a locomotive engine that lacks steam is of climbing the grade. Even a listless, lackadaisical spirit may get on all right so long as the path of life is all on a level or is down grade, but when it comes to hill-climbing and the real experiences of life that serve to develop character, it is likely to give up the contest and surrender the prize it might win to other and more earnest competitors.

Aim above morality. Be not simply good; be good for something. – Thoreau. "If you would get the best results, do your work with enthusiasm as well as fidelity," says Dr. Lyman Abbott. "Only he can who thinks he can!" says Orison Swett Marden. "The world makes way only for the determined man who laughs at barriers which limit others, at stumbling-blocks over which others fall. The Nothing will be mended by complaints. – Johnson. man who, as Emerson says, ’hitches his wagon to a star,’ is more likely to arrive at his goal than the one who trails in the slimy path of the snail."

Peace! Peace! How sweet the word and tender! Its very sound should wrangling discord still. – Nathan Haskell Dole. Every girl knows that the girl friends whom she loves best are the ones who are alive to the world about them and who feel an enthusiasm in the tasks and privileges that confront them.

Enthusiasm is the breeze that fills the sails and sends the ship gliding over the happy waves. It is the joy of doing things and of seeing that things are well done. It gives to work a thoroughness and a delicious zest and to play a whole-souled, health-giving delight.

The Spartans did not inquire how many the enemy are, but where they are. – Agis II. Only they who find joy in their work can live the larger and nobler life; for without work, and work done joyously, life must remain dwarfed and undeveloped. "If you would have sunlight in your home," writes Stopford Brooke, "see that you have work in it; that you work yourself, and set others to work. Nothing makes moroseness and The man in whom others believe is a power, but if he believes in himself he is doubly powerful. – Willis George Emerson. heavy-heartedness in a house so fast as idleness. The very children gloom and sulk if they are left with nothing to do. If all have their work, they have not only their own joy in creating thought, in making thought into form, in driving on something to completion, but they have the joy of ministering to the movement of the whole house, when they feel that The secrecy of success is constancy to purpose. – Disraeli. what they do is part of a living whole. That in itself is sunshine. See how the face lights up, how the step is quickened, how the whole man or child is a different being from the weary, aimless, lifeless, complaining being who had no work! It is all the difference between life and death."

We Men talk about the indignity of doing work that is beneath them, but the only indignity that they should care for is the indignity of doing nothing. – W. R. Haweis. must play life’s sweet keys if we would keep them in tune. Charles Kingsley says: "Thank God every morning when you get up that you have something to do that day which must be done whether you like it or not. Being forced to work, and forced to do your best, will breed in you temperance and self-control, diligence and strength of will, cheerfulness and content, and a hundred virtues which the idle will never know."

All Share your happiness with others, but keep your troubles to yourself. – Patrick Flynn. the introspective thinkers of the world have agreed that nothing else is so hard to do as is "nothing." It is unwholesome for one to have more leisure than a mere breathing spell now and then for the purpose of setting to work once more with renewed energy.

Neither days, nor lives can be made noble or holy by doing nothing in them. – Ruskin. They who work with their hearts as well as their hands do not grow tired. A labor of love is a labor of growing delight. "The moment toil is exchanged for leisure," writes Munger, "a gate is opened to vice. When wealth takes off Use thy youth as the springtime, wherein thou oughtest to plant and sow all provisions for a long and happy life. – Walter Raleigh. the necessity of labor and invites to idleness, nature executes her sharpest revenge upon such infraction of the present order; the idle rich live next door to ruin." And Burton puts the case even more strongly when he says: "He or she that is idle, be they of what condition they will, never so rich, so well allied, fortunate, happy – let them have all things in abundance and felicity that To have ideas is to gather flowers; to think is to weave them into garlands. – Madame Swetchine. heart can wish and desire, – all contentment – so long as he or she or they are idle, they shall never be pleased, never well in mind or body, but weary still, sickly still, vexed still, loathing still, weeping, sighing, grieving, suspecting, offended with the world, with every object, wishing themselves gone or dead, or else carried away with some foolish phantasy or other."

But When a firm decisive spirit is recognized, it is curious to see how the space clears around a man and leaves him room and freedom. – John Foster. riches do not necessarily have to be associated with idleness. Riches rightly employed bestow upon the possessors of them the blessed privilege of being employed in the kind of work where they can serve to the best advantage and do most for their fellowmen. Indeed, the possession of riches places upon those who have them the moral necessity and obligation of doing more and better things in the world than is expected of the ones less amply supplied with wealth. "From every man according to his ability; to every man according to his needs." The larger responsibilities are placed upon those to whom are given the larger means of achievement.

So That person is blest who does his best and leaves the rest, so do not worry. – A. E. Winship. it is a mistake to fancy that the possession of great riches would relieve us from doing all the tasks and duties for ourselves and for others that are inevitably essential for the physical and spiritual health and happiness of all mankind. No matter in whatever walk of Work is the best thing to make us love life. – Ernest Renan. life we may find ourselves, we must exercise our muscles or they will become weak and useless; we must stir and interest our hearts or they will grow hard and unresponsive; we must use our minds or they will become dull and inactive; we must employ our consciences or they will grow to be blind and unsafe guides that must lead us into dark distress.

But If you want to be miserable, think about yourself, – about what you want, what you like, what respect people ought to pay to you, and what people think of you. – Charles Kingsley. to be employed does not mean that we must necessarily work in the fields, or in the factory, or in the office. There are a thousand ways in which we may serve the world. The only requirement is that we shall devote a portion of our time and energy to genuine service in behalf of our brothers, our sisters, our parents, our teachers, our friends, and all the world. And we must be grateful for the chance to serve others and deem it an opportunity rather than an obligation.

Aspiration carries one half the way to one’s desire. – Elizabeth Gibson. And above all, we must find delight in the work we are privileged to do. "Every one should enjoy life," writes the ever glad and inspiring pen guided by the The best thing is to do well what one is doing at the moment. – Pittacus. hand of Patrick Flynn: "Life was made to enjoy. We mean life, itself. The very living and breathing. It is a divine pleasure to inhale a breath of fragrant air out here in the country these charming summer mornings. And what jewels can compare in color or brilliancy To work and not to genius I owe my success. – Daniel Webster. with the pearly dewdrops that shine and glisten in the early sun! And the sun, itself! The great, mysterious, miraculous sun! Its myriads of vibrations No thought is beautiful which is not just, and no thought can be just, that is not founded on truth. – Joseph Addison. dancing in the warm air like golden fairies and dazzling one’s eyes with their wondrous beauty! Aye, and filling one’s soul with love and one’s body with health. And in the evening when the day’s work is done there is above us that mysterious depth of star-spangled sky. We cannot fathom its mystery but like a stream of grace descending from heaven, we can feel the cool, refreshing dew on our upturned brow. Until at last we feel that we should like to take wing and actually fly up among those The loss of self-respect is the only true beggary. – John Lancaster Spalding. unknown worlds and come back with the story to our readers. And even though we cannot grow the wings, we go up in fancy and seldom come back without some new tale. The message is: ’Live life, love life, enjoy life, if you would overcome all fear of death.’"

That is the spirit in which we should look upon all the beauty and wonder about us. To-morrow will ever be a joyous hope and yesterday a golden memory, if we are thoughtful regarding the manner in which we live

TO-DAYLet’s live to-day so it shall be,When shrined within the memory,As free from self-inflicted sorrowsAs are our hopes of our to-morrows.

The tactful person looks out for opportunities to be helpful, without being obtrusive. – Margaret E. Sangster. There are many who make the serious mistake of thinking that joyousness and cheerfulness are only for the play hour and are not to be made a part and factor of the time we must devote to toil. No view could be more faulty and regrettable. It is in our working hours that we should seek to be cheerful and sunshiny. All of our tasks should be sweetened and glorified with the leaven of good humor.

The task seems never very longIf measured with a smile and song.

It is labor alone, backed by a good conscience, that keeps us healthy, happy and sane. – Godfrey Blount. Listen while one faithful worker, Emory Belle, tells us how she carried the spirit of good cheer to her daily tasks and what came of it:

"I started out to my work one morning, determined to try the power of cheerful thinking (I had been moody long enough). I said to myself: ’I have Labor was truly said by the ancients to be the price which the gods set upon everything worth having. – Lord Avebury. often observed that a happy state of mind has a wonderful effect upon my physical make-up, so I will try its effect upon others, and see if my right thinking can be brought to act upon them.’ You see, I was curious. As I walked along, more and more resolved on my purpose, and persisting that I was happy, that the world was treating me well, I was surprised to find myself lifted up, as it were; my carriage became more erect, my step lighter, and I had the sensation of treading Our daily duties are a part of our religious life just as much as our devotions are. – Beecher. on air. Unconsciously, I was smiling, for I caught myself in the act once or twice. I looked into the faces of the women I passed and there saw so much trouble and anxiety, discontent, even to peevishness, that my heart went out to them, and I wished I could impart to Our doubts are traitors, and make us lose the good we oft might win, by fearing to attempt. – Shakespeare. them a wee bit of the sunshine I felt pervading me.