The Mirror of Literature, Amusement, and Instruction. Volume 13, No. 367, April 25, 1829

Now, what does all this come to? Cui bono? A great deal for surgery; let us examine what may be done;—we know that noses may be supplied,—may not, therefore, a small one be enlarged, and a large one made small? We have seen a person with a bunch of noses, but can only, on the authority of Shakspeare, quote one "who had a thousand."

For a great length of time nothing was admired in the world but Roman noses,—and then not a word was heard about them, till William III. brought them again into fashion.

People occasionally possess the power of voluntary action with the muscles of the nose, and can move it horizontally, or to the right and left,—draw it up or protrude it,—so as to make it take any position they please. Painters have been provokingly deceived by this stratagem, and have in vain attempted the portraits of such persons, who were able at every instant to produce a new physiognomy.

One of the qualifications for the Ugly Club was a nose eminently miscalculated, whether as to length or breadth,—the thickest skin had preference.

Hitherto we have only considered external appearances; we must now notice its functional and other properties.

With some persons, the nose is a sort of barometer,—a certain state of the atmosphere is invariably announced to them by an agreeable sensation of coldness at the tip.

Zimmerman used to draw conclusions, as to a man's temperament, from his nose! Not indeed from its size or form, but from the peculiar sensibility of the organ.

Cardan considered acuteness of smell as a proof of penetrating genius, and a lively imagination.

Haller could distinguish perspiration at ten yards' distance.

There have been instances on record of blind people who were able to discover colours by the touch; and deaf and dumb, who could feel sounds by placing their hand upon the speaker's mouth: this, however, is not more astonishing, than that the sense of smelling should be so acute, as to enable some persons to judge by it the quality of metals. Martial mentions a person, named Mamurra, who consulted only his nose, to ascertain whether the copper that was brought him were true Corinthian. There have been Indian merchants who, if a piece of money were given them, by applying their nose to it, defined its quality to a nicety, without touchstone, balance, or aqua-fortis. Europeans, also, are to be found whose sense of smelling is equally delicate and perfect.

Marco-Marci speaks of a monk at Prague, who, when any thing was brought him, distinguished, by its smell, with as much certainty as the best nosed dog, to whom it belonged, or by whom it had been handled. It was also said of him, that he could accurately distinguish, in this manner, the virtuous from the vicious. He was much devoted to the study of natural philosophy; and, among other things, had undertaken to oblige the world with precepts on the sense of smelling, like those we have on optics and acoustics, by distributing into certain classes a great number of smells, to all of which he had given names; but an untimely death cut him off in the midst of these curious researches.

The guides who accompany travellers on the route from Smyrna or Aleppo, to Babylon, have no other signs in the midst of the deserts, to discover their distance from the place of destination, than the smell of the sand alone, by which they determine with certainty. Perhaps they judge by the odour exhaled from small plants, or roots, intermixed with the sand.

Physicians, in visiting the sick, have been known to form a prognostic, before having seen the patient, from the effluvia of the sick-room. Those who are in the habit of visiting the insane, know the peculiar odour that characterises that dire calamity; and it was remarked of the plague, that it had "a scent of the flavour of mellow apples."

It is said that monkeys possess this power of discrimination in a very eminent degree. A story is told of a lady who had a pet of this description, whom she made her constant companion, and who suddenly, without any apparent cause, forsook her, and could not be persuaded to re-enter her chamber. The lady was at that time infected with measles, which shortly after appeared upon her; but, on her perfect recovery, the monkey returned to her with his usual familiarity. Some time after, the same lady caught cold, and was apparently very ill, but without fever. The monkey, as far as might be judged from his appearance, seemed to condole with his sick mistress, and to understand the difference of her distempers, by the confidence with which he remained in attendance upon her.

It has even been said, that the sagacity of some dogs has led them to prognosticate the fatal termination of disease. "Whilst I lived at Ripon," says a learned doctor, "I took notice of a little dog, of a chestnut colour, that very often boded the death of sick persons, without being once, for aught I could learn, mistaken. Every time he barked in the night under the windows of any one whose sickness did not even appear dangerous, it happened, infallibly, that the sick person died that week. I knew also," observes the same author, "a man bit by a mad dog, who could distinguish his friends at a considerable distance by the smell, before even he could distinguish them by sight."

So early as the second century, the supplying the deficiency of a lost nose became an object of professional consideration; and the Greeks gave the name

, to those who required such an operation. Taliacotius was the first who treated it scientifically; and, from his time, the art of Addition became one of the branches of surgery; and, under the title "De Decoratione," formed a very interesting chapter.

Although Taliacotius has the credit of bringing the art of nose-making into fashion, and being the first to write on the mode and manner of performing the operation, yet it appears that one Branca had been in the habit of performing it long before, as we learn from an ancient author, whose name must, in this instance, be considered as the highest authority, being no less a person than Nosorenus.

Why the magistracy of Bologna should have conferred the high honour of a statue on Taliacotius it is difficult to understand,—unless the loss of the nose was of more frequent occurrence than in those days, from the barbarity of warfare and civil punishment; for an old law of the Lombards assigned the loss of the nose as a punishment for theft; and the captives in war were equally spoiled for snuff-takers.

That this was no uncommon dilemma with Italian gentlemen in the fifteenth century, appears by the style in which a Neapolitan poet writes to the noseless Orpianus:—"If," says he, "you would have your nose restored, come to me—truly the thing is wonderful. Be assured that, if you come, you may go home again with as much nose as you please."

It does not, however, appear that the nasal operation made any impression on our ancient English surgeons. Wiseman does not even mention it, though slitting the nose, and cutting off the ears, was a common mode of punishing political delinquents in his time; and it is said that Prynne, whose ears were cut off, had new ones made, "à la Taliacotius." The fact is, that the operation was misunderstood, and disbelieved, as we know by the jocose manner in which it is alluded to by Butler. It has, however, been successfully revived, and performed, by Mr. Carpue.

Connected with the varieties of the organ of scent, is the well-known story of that extraordinary lusus, the Pig-faced Lady.

Brande's Journal.

THE ANECDOTE GALLERY

ARCTIC ADVENTURES

From the Tales of a Voyager. Second Series

THE MORSE, OR SEA HORSE

After a long and tedious interval of misty, dripping weather, we obtained sufficient sun at noon, to find ourselves in latitude 72.19; but a discovery that afforded me most pleasure was the appearance of a sea-horse, lying at some distance from us, on an elevated piece of ice. This animal was first perceived by the captain, from the mast-head, whence he immediately descended, and ordered a boat to be lowered, inviting William and myself to join him in trying to make the monster our prey. When we drew near to its station, it raised its head and displayed one formidable tusk, projecting downwards from its upper jaw towards its breast, whilst part of another, broken by some accident or encounter, offered a less menacing weapon to our view. The beast itself was about the size of a large bullock, and lay upon the ice like a huge mass of animated matter, which seemed to possess no means of locomotion. Its head was disproportionably small to the size of its body, judged according to our usual ideas of the relative difference of bulk between these parts, while its whiskers were evidently larger and stronger than those of any other animal. These singularities gave it a grotesque appearance, not lessened by an approximation in its square short countenance to a caricatured resemblance of the human face, while the half stolid half ferocious stare, with which it regarded us, contributed to render it one of the most strange beings of earthly mould on which I had ever set my eyes.

While I was making these observations, we were rapidly advancing towards the object of them, which, seemingly in doubt whether to take our visit in enmity or friendship, continued to gaze at our approach as it lay (standing not being one of its faculties) at its full height upon a block of ice, about eight feet above the surface of the sea. It must have climbed this elevation by crawling up one side of the frozen mass, which was shelving and easy of access, by means of its tusks and flippers; but, whatever was its way of mounting the acclivity, it quickly showed us how it managed to descend; for, upon a couple of bullets passing through its neck, it gave itself a heave backward, rolled overhead and heels down the slope of the hummock, and was launched violently into the water by the precipitate rush of its heavy body. No sooner did it find itself in its most natural element, than it prepared to dive; but this manoeuvre had been foreseen, and the stern of the boat was on its back at the moment it was about to disappear, and the captain exerting all his force, after striking the weapon with a sudden plunge against its tough hide, drove the harpoon through its skin, and allowed it to make its vain attempt at escape. It then dived and took out several fathoms of line like a whale, but it soon rose to the surface, and reared its frightful head and shoulders above the waves, with the most threatening aspect of deadly warfare. Evidently eager to revenge itself upon its enemies, the morse began to take hasty strokes towards us, yet in a state of hurry and confusion which impressed us with a belief that the balls had inflicted desperate, if not immediately mortal wounds. Nevertheless, it displayed determination enough to enter into close conflict with its foes, and came on, puffing and snorting, with a savage though bewildered look. Seeing this disposition to assail us, we backed astern; but before the walrus had made much progress, the guns were reloaded, and another bullet struck it on the head, which sent it down immediately; however, it quickly appeared again, raising itself high above the water, and looking furiously around for its antagonists. When it perceived our position, it resumed its endeavour to attack us; but during its approach it stopped short, infirm of purpose, probably exhausted with loss of blood, or growing giddy from the shock of the last ball, and allowed us time to discharge a musket once more, and with fatal effect; its head dropped suddenly upon the water, and we pulled up and took it in tow. When we had hoisted it on board, a proceeding that required pretty strong tackle and several hands, it was flayed, yielding a hide of extraordinary thickness, lined on the inside with blubber, and scantily covered externally with short reddish brown hair, the greatest part of its skin appearing to have been denuded of this clothing by eruptive blotches, such as I presume disfigure a measly hog. Although incomparably larger, the general contour of its body resembled the figure of a seal; its frame being of the same description, though differently moulded. It was considerably more bulky in proportion to its length, its chest and back more elevated, its fore flippers thicker and more rounded, and its hind quarters less tapering to the tail. Altogether, it impressed upon the mind a strong idea of a formidable monster, in spite of its relatively diminutive head; for its fearful tusks, and thick-set projecting whiskers, gave its visage a most truculent expression; and with its grotesquely fashioned ponderous carcass, provided with fin feet of strange formation, seemed to mark it as a personification of one of the fabulous conceptions of mythology.

The morse is said to roar or bellow loudly, but the animal we slew made no outcry, for the half sneezing, half snorting sounds it uttered I conceive to have been the consequence of its hasty dive, which had apparently prevented its taking in sufficient breath, and occasioned it to admit some water down its windpipe. Nevertheless, the immense size of its larynx or thropple, which William dissected out and brought with him to England, seems to indicate vast powers of voice in this animal; but I am at a loss to conjecture why it should be provided either with this unusual capability of "blaring," or with the exceedingly strong whiskers that arm its muzzle, organs which, though nominally of little or no importance except in Bond-street, must really be of consequence to the walrus, since their roots are imbedded in two thick cushions of tough blubbery substance, so large as to give a marked character to the countenance, and evidently pointing out the growth and nourishment of these whiskers as a matter of some consideration in the eye of nature.

SEAL'S WEDDING

Just as we had made fast to a floe, to take in water from a bright blue pool which slept on its hollow surface, I was called upon deck to witness "a seal's wedding." This ceremony was performed in a manner which, however nuptial it may have appeared to seamen, was not quite in accordance with my ideas of the hymeneal contract. A "seal's wedding" seems to be a seal's dance, or a combination of gambols, which these animals act together, while swimming rapidly forward in company, leaping above the surface of the water, rolling, tumbling, going "tail up" after each other, and enacting a thousand wild freaks, as unexpected from such grave-looking and clumsy-built harlequins as can be imagined. Yet why should not the solemn visaged, double-chinned phoca partake of one of the most universal habits of animal life—the love of frolic?—a desire which is equally as diffused throughout the living creation as the inclination for fighting. A shoal or "school" of beautiful unicorns also swam past our vessel at this time; they were particularly large, and, from the numerous horns projected from the water, there must have been many males amongst them. They swim, dive, rise, and blow, much like other whales, throwing up their tails when scared, or when intending to take a deep dive, in the same manner, but exhibiting far greater quickness in foreseeing and avoiding the approach of enemies. No satisfactory use has been assigned for the horn that arms the male narwal, nor should any reason be conjectured for its presence that involves its possessor's mode of procuring food, since the same necessity would be unprovided for in the female; yet I have sometimes thought the horn was employed to dislodge the flat-fish, on which the unicorn feeds, from the recesses of the bottom, where they would naturally conceal themselves at the sight of their enemy; and if the narwal seeks its prey in company, as, from its constant appearance in a shoal, may be concluded, the raking of the horns amidst the weeds and ooze would be as serviceable to the unarmed females as to their gallant consorts.

THE GATHERER

A snapper up of unconsidered trifles.Shakspeare.

OLD LOVE SONG

When the bright God of dayDrove to westward his way,And the ev'ning was charming and clear,When the swallows amain,Nimbly skimm'd o'er the plain,And the shadows like giants appear.In a jessamin bower,When the bean was in flower,And the zephyrs breath'd odours around,Lovely Coelia she sat,With her song, and spinnet,To charm all the grove with the sound.Rosy bowers she sung,While the harmony rung,And the birds did all flutt'ring arrive,The industrious beesFrom the flowers and trees,Gently humm'd with their sweets to the hive.Now the gay god of love,As he flew o'er the grove,By zephyrs conducted along,While she play'd on the strings,He beat time with his wings,And an echo repeated the song.Oh ye mortals bewareHow ye venture too near,Love doubly is armed to wound;From her eyes if you run,You are surely undoneIf she reach but your ears with the sound.

EPITAPH ON A LAWYER

The following inscription is taken from a tomb in St. Pancras churchyard, Middlesex. It is a flat stone, which some years since lay even with the ground, but was, about 1815, raised on a few tier of bricks, (to prevent obliteration by footsteps,) by order of the church-wardens, as I was informed by the grave-digger, and which, no doubt, was done on account of the singularity of the lines. The situation of the tomb is not far from the east corner of the church, a little beyond a lofty tomb with a monument. The inscription, from time, has been much defaced, and the verse is not easily made out by a stranger; but I have recollected it since about the year 1778, when it was very perfect. I saw the same in 1817, and took a copy as under:—

"This stone is inscribed to the memory of Mr. Thomas Abbott, of Swaffham, in the county of Norfolk, attorney-at-law, who died lamented by his friends, (enemies he had none,) after a painful and tedious illness, which he bore with patience, resignation, and fortitude becoming a man. Departed this life August the 16th, Anno Domini 1762, aged 48."

"Here lieth one, (believe it if you can,)Who, though an attorney, was an honest man.The gates of heaven for him shall open wide,But will be shut against all the tribe beside."T.R.

A celebrated gunaiphilist having asked a friend with whom he was walking, if the woman they had just met was not very passable, the other replied, "Undoubtedly she was, or I had never got by her, while you were with me at least."

HEBES.

A WEDDING

A tragic-comic meeting, compounded of favours, footmen, faintings, farewells, prayers, parsons, plumcakes, rings, refreshments, bottles, blubberings, God bless-ye's, and gallopings away in a post-chaise and four.

CHARADE

A natural production, neither animal, vegetable, nor mineral, neither male nor female, yet often produced between both; it exists from two to six feet high, is often spoken of in romances, and strongly recommended by precept, example, and Holy Writ.—A kiss.

Extempore written during the time some medical pupils were considering how they should remove the heart of a young woman deceased, whom the friends allowed them to open, on condition that they took no part away:—

St. Thomas's pupils, I cannot help grieving,To think it should ever be said,That we, who so oft steal girls' hearts whilst they're living,Should steal them as well when they're dead.We're admitted in confidence, and with relianceThe friends on our honour depend;We have given the pledge, then disgrace not the science,By stealing the heart from a friend.E.C.

Sir Isaac Newton was, it is well known, extremely fond of employing his leisure hours in fishing. Being one day asked by a fellow-collegian how it happened that so vast a genius could stoop to a pursuit so trifling at the best, replied, "How is it possible that you should be surprised at my being a lover of the angle?"

HEBES.

1

The preamble speaks of two Mac Ranalds, (chiefs,) and then enumerates three. It is probable there were two families who had been usually elected to the chieftaincy, and that Cahal, the son of Conachar, represented one family, Toraylach and Gerald the other. I give this, however, only as a conjecture. Perhaps the safest way will be to set it down as an Irish bull, the earliest upon record.

2

"Witness," said my friend, "the bracelets which I am now wearing; they are modelled from a pair found in Pompeii." These were made of gold, quite in the fashion of the present day; beautifully chased, but by no means of an uncommon pattern.

3

This is an unlucky word for a cookery book. Why not say operations? Mrs. D. Mrs. D! you have not escaped the scientific mania that is mounting from area to attic throughout this country. Such a term as manipulation sounds well enough in Mr. Brande's laboratory at the Royal Institution, but would be quite out of place in the kitchen of either of the hotels in the same street. A footman might as well study the polarization of light whilst cleaning the drawing-room windows.

4

Lear.

5

1 Henry IV. iv. 2.

6

2 Henry IV. ii. 1.

7

Henry V. ii. 1.

8

"Ovidius Naso was the man: and why, indeed, Naso; but for smelling out the odoriferous flowers of fancy?" says Holofernes, the school-master, in Love's Labour Lost.