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With determination, she stepped out of her car and moved up the gravel walkway to the deep wraparound porch. Her hand caressed the smooth railing as she climbed the wide steps. The huge glass door sparkled from the waning light.
“I can take the jacket.”
The female voice from deep in the porch caused her to jump. Placing her hand flat against her racing heart, Vickie turned to face Maria Torres, Jake’s mother.
“I didn’t see you there.” Vickie moved to the swing at the end of the porch.
“There’s no reason for you to go inside.” Maria closed her Bible and set it to the side. The slight Spanish accent softened her words. “I can make sure he gets it. Just lay it there in the rocking chair.”
“I...would like to thank him for helping me the other night.” Vickie looked back to the door. Maybe she had made a mistake. Trying to recapture some youthful fantasy that had never even been real wasn’t a good idea.
Maria’s eyebrows went up. “Yes, Jake is very good at helping people. I hear Seth has fully recovered. I’ve been praying for him.” Maria folded her hands in her lap and gently swung, the chains creaking over the wood.
“Thank you for your prayers. I know they helped. The doctors said he was very fortunate.”
“Our children are our most precious gifts from God. We must protect them. Right? As mothers we understand the big picture.”
Vickie didn’t like where this was going. “Right. But as they grow up, we have to allow them to make their own choices.”
“True. Let me speak honest with you, Mrs. Miller.” She smoothed out her blouse, her accent thicker now. “You have hurt Jake in the past, a hurt that was not easy for him to get over. I lost him once because of you. You might care for him now, but we both know you are not what he needs. Please do not pull him back into your life.”
Horrified that Maria blamed her for him leaving for the marines the day after graduation, Vickie looked down to the wood boards. She heard he had built this house with his own hands. Vickie laid the jacket on the empty rocker. “I’m no longer Miller. It’s just Lawson now.” She bit into her bottom lip and looked at the setting sun. “No disrespect, Mrs. Torres, but I was not the one who left without a word.”
“If you truly want what is best for him, you will stay away from him.”
“Mother!”
Jake’s voice startled both women.
“I’m old enough to pick my own friends.” Jake stood at the far edge of the house. The setting sun cast him in silhouette, a bridle in his hand.
How long had he been standing there?
Maria stood and headed for the door. Toting her Bible, she nodded to Vickie. “I’m going to make dinner.” Without a backward glance, she marched to the cut-glass door. With her head up, she swung the door open and glided through it. The gentle but firm click reminded Vickie that she had no right to enter Jake’s world.
Hanging the leather headset and braided reins on a hook, Jake made his way up the steps. “Sorry about that.” He sent her one of his heart-stopping grins.
She could spend hours staring at his smile. Sighing, she pulled herself back to reality. She was lying to herself; she wanted more than friendship with Jake Torres, and that could not happen.
He moved to the swing his mother had just abandoned and patted the space next to him. “As you know, mothers can get protective, no matter what age their children are.”
Shaking her head, Vickie edged toward the railing, putting more distance between them. “She has a point.”
“Come on, sit and tell me how Seth’s doing.” He leaned back, stretching his arms across the back of the seat.
His offer tempted her. She gripped the railing, keeping herself away from him. “He’s good, ready to get back to all his regular activities.”
“There’s a father-and-son flag-football game coming up at the church picnic in a couple of weeks. It’s part of our mentoring program at the church. We’ve been practicing.” He grinned. “More like an excuse to throw the ball around and have fun. I thought I could take Seth. If he’s ready, would he like that?”
“Oh, he loves football. Well, he did, anyway. The last couple of times he played with the YMCA in San Antonio were rough. Tommy had high expectations. He made Seth play quarterback.” She looked down at her feet, and followed the patterns made by the grains of wood. “Well, you know how Tommy is on the field. No room for mistakes.” She looked back at Jake. “He might not want to play anymore.”
Jake grunted and looked to the hills, the sun almost gone. “Yeah, I know Tommy. Spent way too many years on the field with him. But there’s more to football than quarterbacking.” He looked back toward her, his dark eyes intense in the last rays of light. “If you don’t mind, I’d love to take Seth and reintroduce him to the fun of football. It’s flag, so not much hitting. Is that okay with you?”
“Yeah, thank you. It’ll be good for him to be around other boys. He hasn’t made many friends since we came back.”
“You could use a friend, too. You and Ashley can join us. We could grab something to eat afterward.”
For a moment, she imagined them all together, almost like a real family. Her gaze traveled the outline of his house. If she had made the right choice in high school, this warm home and special man could’ve been hers. But she hadn’t. The reality of it hit her hard. As much as she would love to reconnect with Jake, she had to put her life back in order, starting with her kids.
Her kids were the best part of her life. The one thing she got right with Tommy.
Her baggage was too heavy to leave on Jake’s steps. Friendship with Jake sounded good, but now she knew she’d want more.
She made so many wrong choices and it was too late to change them. “Jake, your mother’s right. I’m not what you need.”
He leaned forward, elbows planted on his knees. “Why don’t you and my mother let me decide what I need?”
His intense stare seared right to her heart. She couldn’t handle that look right now. Vickie stepped back. “I’ve got to go. The kids are waiting for me at my parents’ house. Bye, Jake.” She ran to her car, clenching her teeth.
It took two tries for her car to start. She was not good at the dramatic exit. She pulled out of his drive and with one last glance into the rearview mirror, she saw Jake at the top of the steps, watching her. There wasn’t enough light to see his expression.
She needed to focus on the road in front of her. Heading back to her small trailer, Vickie fought the urge to cry for the girl that had not been strong enough to be the woman Jake needed when they were in high school.
* * *
Jake paused in the archway leading to his kitchen. He watched his mother as she lifted the lid to stir the contents of the steaming pot. The rich aroma of the carne guisada encouraged him to forget what he wanted to say. No, he wouldn’t let her cooking distract him. They needed to get some things straightened out.
“Sit, mijo, dinner’s almost done.”
So she wanted to pretend nothing had happened with Vickie. Not this time.
“Mother, I love you, but I’m a grown man. I don’t need you to pick my friends.” Standing at the sink to wash his hands, Jake looked over his backyard. The surrounding hills created a cocoon around the pasture. In the twilight, he could make out his pair of roping horses.
He had put together a life he loved. He just never found anyone to share it with, well, other than Vickie. His mind always went back to her. “You had no right to be rude to Vickie.”
“She’s not your friend. She made her choice and married Tommy Miller. And you do need help. You are almost thirty-one and not married. I should have grandchildren.” She filled two plates with the mouth-watering sauce and meat and set them on the table. Hands in her lap she waited for Jake to join her before continuing. “I remember your pain after she went with that boy to the prom.”
He tried not to roll his eyes. “That’s old history. Vickie’s divorced now. She was married to the wrong man. You should understand that better than anyone.” He dug a fork into his dinner. “If I want to pursue a relationship with Vickie, that’s my business.” He looked at his mother, pointing the meat-loaded utensil at her. “Please be nice to her.”
Across from him, she picked at her plate. “I just don’t want to see you get hurt again. You need to move on, and I need grandchildren in my old age. Your sister has run off and shows no sign of settling down.”
Jake grinned. “Amá, she didn’t run away. She’s studying to be a lawyer.”
“Yes, well, she made it clear she has no desire to get married.” She looked around the large kitchen that opened to a cozy family room. “It’s my fault. Look at this beautiful home you made. You built this home for a family, but the only kids ever here are the youth groups from the church. You deserve a family of your own.” She looked him straight in the eyes, lips firm. “I deserve grandchildren.”
“I think you might have already said that a few hundred times.” He used a warm corn tortilla to soak up the gravy on the beef tips. “There’s a side to Vickie no one gets to see.”
“Maybe you’re blind to what everyone else knows about her. She is her mother’s daughter.”
His jaw flexed. “And I’m my father’s son.”
Maria gasped and reached for his hand. “No. Oh, mijo, don’t ever say that!”
“Did you forget what I did?”
She stood, the chair toddling on back legs before settling down. “No! You will not speak of that. The fault was mine.” She picked up her Bible. “You are not your father, you’re not!”
Jake pushed away from the table and pulled his mother into his arms, hugging her short frame against his chest. “I’m sorry, amá. I shouldn’t have said anything.” He closed his eyes and buried his guilt. “I just wanted you to know the Vickie I know. The summer we moved here, well, she helped me...I don’t know, she helped me in ways I can’t explain.”
“I remember her as a sweet girl, I do, but you are from different worlds.” Her head shook against his chest before stepping away. “I was their housekeeper. It would be easier if you turned your attention to someone more like us.”
“Mother, we’ve already had this conversation.” He sighed.
“Maybe you hang on to your love for her because she’s safe?”
As the words sank in, he stared at his tiny mother. Safe, with no risk of being in a real relationship. Did he? Vickie had always kept him at a distance, no jealous rages to worry about.
His mother went to the sink and ran the washcloth under the water. “You’re a good man, Jake.” Keeping her eyes down, she started wiping the counter. “Juan always bullied—his sisters, me, even his dogs.” Her lips tight, she neatly folded the dishrag and draped it over the pewter faucet. “But enough of that nonsense.”
For a moment Jake’s brain echoed her words. She never, ever mentioned his father by name. Never spoke of him.
“Here, take this.” She slipped a blue piece of paper from her Bible and held it out until he automatically took the handwritten number. “This is Anjelica Ortega’s cell phone number. Her mother gave it to me. We know you’ll be perfect together. She needs an honorable man after losing her husband. Call her. She’s waiting to hear from you. If nothing else, it’s just a date, right? When was the last time you went out for fun?”
With a sigh, Jake took the number and slipped it into his wallet, hoping that simple action would put the discussion to rest for now.
His mother meant well. She truly believed he needed a wife and children to be happy. He had tried dating, and it never felt right.
He remembered Anjelica and Steve from school. They were younger and always together. No one had been surprised when they married a month after graduation and two months later, he went to boot camp. In less than a year, she was a war widow. That was years ago. He hadn’t seen much of her in town.
He hadn’t seen much of Vickie, either. She was always working at the Mercantile or hiding on the ranch. She had made the first step by coming to his home. But then she ran off, putting distance between them, again.
This time he would follow her. There was no reason to tell his one-track-minded mother his new plan.
He pushed his hair off his forehead and flexed his jaw. Right now, his brain needed a break from all this emotional turmoil. He didn’t want to think about Anjelica and her young soldier or Vickie and the coward she had married.
He flopped down on the overstuffed leather sofa and wrapped his fingers around his remote. He just wanted to watch some football for the next few hours. Tomorrow he would map out a plan to get to know Vickie again. Seth needed guidance, too. He knew from firsthand experience that having a bad father was worse than not having one at all. The flag football game would be a good place to undo any damage Tommy might have caused to the boy’s confidence.
Chapter Five (#ulink_5b4224fa-66b3-5b37-9635-57170d1d10e4)
Jake pulled his black Silverado to the front of Vickie’s trailer. He grinned as he leaned over the steering wheel. Who would have thought Vickie Maria Lawson would choose to live in the old worker’s house.
Two decades had passed since his mother had taken the job as the Lawsons’ housekeeper. The rent-free trailer had been one of the benefits. Coming from a tiny, one-room house in the crowded border-town of Eagle Pass, this single-wide trailer felt huge. For the first time he’d had his own room, his own bed.
Stepping out of his truck, Jake heard music blaring from the narrow trailer. The tune sounded like something from their high school days.
On the first step, the worn wood gave and dangerously shifted under his weight. That needed to be fixed. He jotted the note in his mind.
He wondered why she moved in here instead of her parents’ house. The big house, as they called it growing up, could easily fit five families.
He remembered his first trip to the big house. Looking over from his old home, he had once thought the trailer a mansion. A grin followed a chuckle. The Lawson home had awed him with the massive rooms, winding staircases and endless hallways, making him feel he had fallen down the rabbit’s hole into Alice’s Wonderland.
He remembered the moment the oldest daughter, Miss Victoria Lawson, entered the grand room. Struck dumb would be an understatement.
Until the next week, anyway, when he found her in the old barn behind his trailer, sitting in the dirt, wearing a ratty T-shirt. She was feeding three abandoned lambs, laughing as they climbed over her, fighting for the bottle she held.
He smiled. Her laughter from that day would be forever branded in his memory.
The other night he had tried to explain to his mother how Vickie had helped him. She had done so much for him that summer. She had saved him from falling into a deep, dark hole of despair.
She now lived in his old house. If he hadn’t believed before, he absolutely knew God enjoyed a sweet bit of irony.
With a deep inhale, he moved forward. They were no longer kids hiding from their mothers or teenagers trying to figure out life. Maybe this time they could get it right.
The music covered his knock. Jake could smell freshly baked cookies as he eased open her unlocked door. He would need to talk to her about that safety issue, mental note number two.
Pausing in the door frame, Jake leaned his right shoulder against the edge, crossing his arms. He couldn’t stop the smile from growing as he watched Vickie jump around while singing into a whisk. Her high ponytail swung with each movement.
Leaping to the side, her bare feet landed hard on the worn carpet, rattling the thin walls. His grin grew. She had always hated wearing shoes, much to her mother’s horror.
Vickie spun around and screamed. One hand over her chest and breathing hard, she threw the whisk at him.
Laughing, he ducked and the silver utensil went sailing out the open door.
“Jake Torres! That’s not funny. You scared me to death.”
“You left your door unlocked, but please don’t stop on my account.” Closing the door, he moved farther into her living room. He paused and surveyed the small space. “Wow, the trailer looks the same as it did when I lived here, but I don’t remember it being so small.”
Vickie walked to the counter and turned the volume down. “Yeah, well, you realize you’re, like, one hundred times bigger now?” She tried to suppress a giggle. “Back then I was taller than you.”
He savored the sound he’d been denied for so many years. “We were ten.” He tapped his knuckles on the old counter that separated the galley kitchen from the living area. “I can’t believe your dad still has this old thing with the original furniture.”
“I’m saving up my money to buy us a house. No reason to waste it on furniture when this works.”
He slowly looked over the small living space remembering when this little house had made him feel safe for the first time ever.
A family portrait of Vickie and Tommy with the kids hung on the wall giving Jake a kick in the gut and bringing him back to the present.
Vickie had moved to the other side of the Formica counter and started cleaning. “Daddy had a contract to haul it off when I first moved back.” She looked up at him with a gleam in her eye. “My mother just about had a heart attack when I announced I wanted the trailer.”
“But your dad gave it to you, anyway.”
“Of course. He offered to buy me a new house, but I wanted this one.”
“Why?” Jake couldn’t keep the skepticism out of his voice.
“Believe it or not, some of my favorite memories with my best friend happened here.”
He shot one eyebrow up and stared at her. “Really?”
