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She turned the key. Click... Click. No! She tried again. Nothing. Come on. Please start.
One more try. The engine started. Yes! So much for a grand exit. It didn’t purr, not like the Mercedes she drove just two years ago. She reminded herself to be grateful for a car she bought with her own money. Pulling back onto the country road, she headed to the arena on the edge of town.
* * *
Back in the SUV, Jake turned off the flashing light. With a heavy sigh, he started the engine.
He spent years ignored by Vickie. He should be used to it by now. Nevertheless, seeing her so battered by life hurt him in a way he suspected he’d never get over.
After checking the empty road for traffic, he pulled out to follow her. He’d pay the ticket himself if it would keep him from having to arrest her. He imagined she’d never forgive him for putting her in jail in front of her daughter.
Vickie would never forgive him for helping her, either. Describing her as stubborn was like calling the Texas sun in August a little warm.
Just a couple of months ago her son had been airlifted to San Antonio after almost drowning. He thought they had connected that night and she would be more open to reviving their old friendship.
Going by the Mercantile where she worked, he tried talking to her, but she managed to be in the back of the store whenever he stopped by.
Vickie made it clear that he had no place in her life.
He finally got to see her face-to-face, only to have to threaten to arrest her. Not the impression he wanted to make.
Easing into the parking spot next to Vickie’s small vehicle, Jake put the Explorer in park in front of the sixty-year-old county building. The windows of the wood exhibit hall shimmered with pink and red metallic ribbons.
A couple of faces appeared through the streamers followed quickly by three girls rushing outside. “Ashley! Where have you been? You volunteered to decorate.”
The oldest one, Rachel Levi, the pastor’s daughter, stopped at the edge of the concrete slab and looked at Vickie instead of the younger girls. “Mrs. Lawson, is Seth with you?”
“No, sweetheart, he’s with his grandfather.” Vickie reached over and pulled the cupcakes out.
Ashley stood with her box of cards. “He’s grounded. But he made a card for you.”
“Really?” A smile lit up her face. The preteen turned to Vickie. “He’s still grounded because we snuck out?”
“No, Rachel, he has a whole new set of reasons.”
Her lips drawn, the girl looked uncomfortable. She had been with Seth the night he ran away and had pulled his unconscious body out of the river.
“Is your father here tonight?” Vickie asked.
Rachel nodded. “Daddy still doesn’t allow me anywhere without him.”
Jake looked at his watch. If Vickie was going to get her fines paid today, she needed to make those calls before the office closed.
He moved forward to take the cupcakes from her. “Come on, girls, let’s get these inside. Ms. Lawson has some calls to make before the party starts.”
Ashley and Celeste, Rachel’s little sister, skipped to his side, holding hands. “Celeste, my mom made penguin cupcakes,” Ashley said.
Rachel went in, shoulders slumped, but the other girls hopped around him.
“Oh, Ashley, these are the cutest cupcakes ever.” Mia De La Cruz, one of Ashley’s friends, held the door open for them.
At the far end of the room, women were setting the tables with food and drinks. He knew everyone. To his left Pastor John and Adrian De La Cruz kicked balloons out of their way as they walked toward him.
Adrian, a carpenter and roper Jake hung out with, slapped him on the back. “So you giving Ms. Lawson and her cupcakes a police escort?”
He smiled. “Looks that way, doesn’t it? So where do these guys go?”
“I’ll take them, Officer Torres.” Rachel took the box from him and headed across the open floor.
Tables covered in more pink and red lined the walls. They left the center open for games and dancing. He spent many nights in his youth at the 4-H meetings and parties with Adrian and Vickie. “So now you’re one of the 4-H parents?”
Adrian laughed. “That’s me, dad of the Valentine’s party. Happens a lot faster than you realize. Are you staying to help?”
“No, I just followed Vickie. I’m heading out, still on duty.”
“Daddy!” Mia, Adrian’s ten-year-old daughter, ran toward them. “Ms. Ortega is looking for the oranges and Hula-Hoops. Did you bring them in?”
“Yeah, I’ve got ’em.” With another slap on Jake’s back, Adrian followed his daughter to the group of mothers.
John gave him a quick goodbye and headed to his daughters.
Jake used to wonder what it would be like to have his own family. One part of him loved the thought of being the dad that helped at the 4-H events and rodeos, watching his own kids participate and compete. The other part knew he had no business being anyone’s father or husband. The knowledge didn’t seem to stop him from dreaming, though.
Vickie peeked around the door, scanning the area until she spotted him. She waved him over then disappeared outside.
For some insane reason, he smiled as he followed her through the door. Tomorrow she’d go back to ignoring him, but for now he had her full attention.
Chapter Two (#ulink_d79abeb9-7cc2-5e2d-8b7b-65624b0bd487)
Vickie stood at her backyard fire pit alone, watching the dancing flames, the day finally over. She’d paid her ticket and left the party as soon as she could. Tomorrow would have been her thirteenth wedding anniversary. With the ugly emotions surfacing, it was a good thing Ashley went home with Mia, and Seth had stayed the night at her parents’ house.
She had not had a second to herself in two months and tonight she needed some alone time. A fitting end to her worst Valentine’s Day ever.
Well, maybe not the worst. Three years ago today, she found out her husband had been involved with his campaign manager, a woman she trusted. A woman that had sat at her dinner table and played with her kids. An anniversary gift she’d never forget.
She had worked so hard at being the good wife to a man that didn’t care about being a good husband or father. It was all about image for Tommy.
Dousing the fire pit with diesel, Vickie watched the flames dance high into the Texas night sky. Hands on her hips, she looked up, following the tongues of orange as they curled and danced toward the stars.
For a moment, she focused on the silhouetted hills surrounding her father’s ranch. She grew up counting the trees along the riverbank. Their smell always gave her comfort, but not tonight.
Tonight she needed to do something to purge the remaining traces of bitterness and feeling of helplessness. Maybe a good cry. She snorted. Her mother would disapprove.
Crying didn’t solve anything, just made a person look weak. Opening the elaborate cover of her wedding album, she looked at the engagement picture. That girl looked like a stranger to her now. She was made up in the image of her mother.
Tommy smiled at the camera, one arm wrapped around her waist. Her hand flat against his shirt, showing off the large diamond. She tossed the grinning groom into the blaze and stared as his face distorted before vanishing into ashes.
She couldn’t think of one single day in the last two years she had even missed Tommy and his hypercritical demands. Finding out about the other woman was her breaking point. He blamed her, telling her he couldn’t love her.
Being a wife and mother was all she ever wanted. She didn’t seem to be winning in that department, either. She rolled her head back and closed her tired eyes.
A grown woman with an eleven-year-old son and seven-year-old daughter to raise and not a marketable skill in sight.
Her mother lectured her for the past twelve years about being the good wife, even after the divorce. People in her family did not get divorced.
Against all evidence, Elizabeth Lawson hung on to the dream that Tommy would come back and beg her forgiveness, becoming the model family man. Vickie knew it was beyond over. She failed at marriage and had messed up the perfect family history. Her mother would have to find a way to deal.
The one thing she would not be, could not be, was a failure at being a mom. Her kids needed her more than ever since Tommy’s disappearing act.
She tore out another photo, her mother fussing over the intricate pile of hair the hairdresser had created around the bridal veil. Miles of perfectly preserved white lace and tiny beaded pearls surrounded Vickie along with all her mother’s plans and expectations.
Seth needed her to be strong. She knew the divorce and his father’s abandonment hurt him beyond words.
Flipping the heavy page, she ripped out another photo. Into the fire the kiss went. Running down the steps of the church...gone.
The three-foot wedding cake...history.
The breeze blew smoke into her face. Vickie’s chest and throat started to burn as tears finally escaped, one after another. Her eyesight blurred as she watched each picture vanish in the multicolored inferno.
Headlights made their way down the long drive. She gritted her teeth. Why couldn’t her mother just leave her alone in her misery? Using the bottom of her oversize T-shirt, Vickie wiped her face.
The car door opened and closed.
“Vickie?” A strong, masculine voice surprised her. She hung her head. Much worse than her mother, the ex-best friend that almost arrested her today. Officer Jake Torres.
“I could see the flames from the highway. You know the county is in the middle of a burn ban.” He walked straight toward her.
She pretended not to notice his wide shoulders or powerful legs. He was a walking cliché of a Texas Ranger. “Officer Torres, I would think you had better things to do than bother women—” A leftover sob escaped her chest. She swallowed it back down “—on their own property. Is this an arrestable offense also?”
He sat on his heels, hunched next to her as he picked up a picture that had fallen in the dirt. “Wedding pictures?”
She stared at the fire, hoping he would leave. She didn’t want to share her humiliation with anyone, especially her childhood crush. Every girl at school had giggled whenever Jake walked by. He had been her best friend but completely out of reach.
He thrust his chin to the box at her feet. “In honor of your anniversary?”
She turned to him in shock. “You remembered my wedding date? Tommy never did.” She should look away. Please, just go away before I start to think I could rely on you. “You weren’t even there.”
This time he broke eye contact first. “Yeah, I...um... I had to be somewhere else.”
Why didn’t you take me with you? “You had to run off and save the world.”
He reached out and touched her arm. His dark hand stood in contrast to her pale skin.
“Vickie, are you all right? Has Tommy done something?” She jerked her arm back. Don’t let him think you need a friend, Victoria Maria. She turned her face away from him and focused on the fire. “I’m fine. This is not about Tommy. He’s in Florida planning his new future, and I’m here with the kids. That’s all I need.” Please leave before I do something stupid like cry in front of you.
He pulled his hand back and stood. “You’re a good mother. Listen, I know you’ve had a couple of rough years, but you have people that are here for you if you need anything.”
The problem with that was she needed to learn to take care of herself. Swallowing the lump in her throat, she focused on the popping of the fire. Maybe if she ignored him, he’d go away.
* * *
Looking around, he spotted the green water hose, neatly curled up like a snake. With a turn of the old knob, he had the water running full blast. Stretching the hose from the old barn to the pit, he started smothering the flames. Jake scanned the area for any wayward embers.
Vickie burst from her chair almost eye to eye with him, even barefoot. He always liked her height. He frowned. Was that the problem? His mother was always trying to match him up with short women.
“Hey! That’s my fire. Just because you wear a uniform now doesn’t mean you...”
“Victoria, it’s so dry, the smallest spark could turn your father’s ranch into an inferno.”
Standing, she crossed her arms over her chest and glowered at him.
He smiled.
The hostility in her glare was so much better than the defeated look he saw earlier.
With a deep sigh, she looked away and ran her fingers through her dark blond mane. “I’m sorry.”
Tonight her hair hung loose, looking wild as the flames reflected off the long strands. He loved it down. Most of the time, she kept it styled and starched. He had to lean in a bit to hear what she muttered.
“I don’t know why I say the things I do. It just pops in my head and out of my mouth.” She turned her face back to him. Her eyelashes glistened with moisture. “I’m so tired of fighting. Seth and I had another argument earlier today.”
Jake concentrated on putting out the flames. He could control this fire for her. He had no idea how to help her with the rest of her life. “Don’t be so hard on yourself. Talk to him, explain what’s going on. Believe me, sons are very forgiving of their mothers.”
He shoveled some dirt from the nearby mound into the pit. The last of the flames died out, separating them with a column of thick smoke.
She flopped back down in the camping chair. “I’m sure he’d be much happier without me as his mother.” She closed her eyes. “I can’t blame him. I don’t want to be around me, either.”
“Seth loves you. He’s just angry and confused right now. Give him some time.” He coiled the hose. Standing a good ten feet away, he could still see her shivering as she huddled into a ball.
With the fire out, all the heat vanished, leaving the cold breeze and smoke between them.
He didn’t want to leave, but he had to get going.
A few steps and he was next to her. He slipped off his jacket and laid it over her thin T-shirt. Sitting on his heels next to the camouflaged chair, his hand resting on the canvas arm, as close to her as possible without touching, he said, “Listen, Vickie, I know it’s been a tough couple of years, but life will get better.”
“Thanks.” Her tight-lipped answer gave him the first clue that their friendly discussion had ended about as fast as it had started.
He stood. “Call me if you need anything.” Like the hardheaded idiot he was, he waited. After a few extensive minutes loaded with nothing but his own breathing, Jake stepped back. “Good night, Victoria.” Another pause, just to make sure she had nothing else to say.
With a locked jaw, he walked to his patrol car. He forced himself to look straight ahead, no turning back, not one glance over his shoulder. No, she had made it clear over the years she didn’t need him. So why did he think tonight would be any different?
* * *
Vickie watched as each step took Jake farther away from her. She bit her lip as her fingernails cut into her palms. The urge to call him ripped at her throat. He slipped into his black SUV and reversed out of her drive. A new type of sadness wrapped itself around her heart. She hadn’t felt so alone with him next to her.
Thick smoke rose from the fire pit. She wanted to throw her whole album into the now-soggy, mud-filled hole, but it was a part of her children’s history. A part of her history—the good, bad and ugly.
Instead of dwelling on old hurts, she knew her time would be better spent focusing on the good and reading her Bible. Two months ago, holding her unconscious son’s cold hand, she prayed for God’s forgiveness, wise words and a new heart.
