Simple Truths of Life

After some time, I came to the village again to help my mom take the crop away. Before, my father would do this on his car, which he sold a couple of years ago but could ride on it by proxy.

We had to pay for father's debts on housing and communal services, and we thought about renting it. To do this, it was necessary to put the apartment in order, which was not at all easy.

I came to father’s apartment on a clear sunny day to clean the walls of the kitchen of old crumbling paint. While working, something distracted my attention, and I looked to my left towards the corridor. I saw a white translucent figure looking at me, and then it quickly “walked” sideways behind the wall of the small room. I realized that these were the very 19% of electrons that used to be part of my father. I was not scared, because I knew about the reasons for ghosts, but sometimes I would still glance around.

The other day, when I was already with my mother, who was helping clean the floor in the large room, I saw something white flowing along my right hand. I thought it was mom, but when I turned around, she was doing something by the wall, and her back was turned to the windows. These were again the electrons that are not part of the Astral body, and are separated from the physical body three days after the death of a person.

The other day, I worked in my father’s apartment alone. In the evening, when it was already dusk, I was about to leave. I turned on the light as I was changing into clean clothes in the small room. With lateral vision, I noticed how something dark and small moves in the corridor from right to left. I thought that it could be a neighbor's cat, who sometimes visited the apartment, but when I looked directly at the moving object, it became clear to me that it was a dark mass that disappeared behind the door. I got control over myself and calmly left.

After these experiences with this real ghost, it became very clear to me that the bright entity in the village was not a ghost.

After the death of my father, I often cried. Thinking about the reasons, I think that my emotions lashed out so much because of all the stupid things that I had to do all those years, in which I could live in a completely different way. Perhaps this would have affected my father, and he would not have drunk so much. After all, he once obeyed me and was sober on my birthday…

And so, my mother and I were in my father’s apartment, and again emotions and tears came flooding over me. I was in the corridor – in the very spot where months earlier I saw the dark mass – when I felt something cold touch a part of my left hand. I want to emphasize that it was part of the hand, and not the entire bare hand, which eliminates the draft…

While sorting out the apartment, we found father’s children's photographs. I regret that he never showed me them. I always knew my father as an adult and never imagined him as a child. These photos could help me understand and forgive dad much earlier.

I also noticed that my father began to go bald very early, and when I was born, he was already completely bald at his age of 29 years. There are two points here. Firstly, I used to be very worried about hair loss, but in fact my baldness was not so fast, and at thirty I still have some hair on my head. Secondly, I remembered how, as a child, my dad told me that when I was born, he was healthy (meaning that he had all his hair) – but the photos told the opposite… Looking back, I would have preferred if my dad just told me the truth, or did not say anything. His words did rather worse than better, as I started to believe that I would be fine in terms of appearance. Knowing what awaited me, I might have come to terms with it, and also tried to make better use of what I had in my youth.

I was recalling many events from my life, and one memory reminded me of one thing my father said. When I was in high school my computer broke down. To be precise, the power supply burned out after I punched the case. My father took the whole computer for repair, and then he got drunk. I called him and firmly demanded to bring my computer back. To this, he told me then: “Слушай ты, мудак…” (“Listen you, asshole…” is about the closest translation, but it is not the same on the emotional level for me) – this was the first and last time when dad told me something bad, and then I started to have a heavy hysterics, because I was very strongly offended by the fact that my father told me that. Mom then called him and scolded him. The bottom line is that the phrase “listen you…” followed by either an insulting word or nothing, was told me 3 times throughout my life: by my father, by the village friend, and by Thao.

Other than that, dad was always very kind to me. He was often happy to see me, and he was frequently smiling and joking.

I understood that father would one day live a new life in a new body. I hoped that he would have to suffer less than he had already suffered. It is a pity that he did not manage to overcome the habit of drinking alcohol, and even lying in the hospital asked the worker to bring him a drink. Naturally, she refused and then told everything to my mom.

I often started having dreams about my father. I do not even know if I ever once dreamed about him while he was alive.

In one dream, he asked me: “Why didn’t you go?”

Before that dream, I often recalled how long ago, when I was leaving the village with my father, maybe even for the last time, dad asked my mother and me if we would like to go by car to another city – Suzdal or something like that. Due to the fact that I dreamed of leaving for the USA and forgetting about everything and everyone, I did not have much desire to go somewhere, and my bad habit did not allow me to go physically either. And so I ask myself a question with tears in my eyes – for what purpose did I have to do all this nonsense?

Then there was a dream where I was told that my father was already born in a new body.

And then I had a dream where I was in his apartment and saw a woman and a man there. I knew that he was my former father in a new body. In the dream, I told him about it, but he did not recognize me. I knew that they drank, but not much, and my father did not spend weeks in bed being drunk. The man had a full head of dark hair, and the woman, as I knew, was his wife. In real life, father offered mother to get married, but she refused because there was an example of a failed marriage in front of her eyes, and she was afraid that the same thing could happen to her.

It reminded me of another unexpected thing that my father told me in my childhood. He suddenly told me about a young woman to whom he went to confess his love, and then it turned out that she was not worth it. Perhaps in his next life everything will be different…

Also dad told me once, when I already had problems with the desire to live, that “Water does not flow under a lying stone”. The saying was, of course, on point, but due to the fact that I was offended at heart at the incident with my mother, I did not want to follow his advice, since he would be right.

This is strange, but such things happen. There is one streamer who told on her stream that she married once just to hurt her ex-boyfriend, or something like that. Needless to say, she divorced and realized her mistake.

I also remembered how my father pulled me out of the snow in a ditch in front of a neighboring house in the village. I was then little and, while walking in the snow, fell into a hole formed at a large concrete pipe in the ditch. I tried to get out, but the snow only buried me more. I did not even have time to panic, as my father was already pulling me out of the snow prison, which in theory could become fatal. As it turned out, he was keeping an eye on me all the time.

Then there was a dream where I was in the village, and there was my father too. I knew that it was the next summer, and we were repairing the well. This was impossible, since dad was not alive.

That dream was a reference to my old dream with a mirror image telling me “I will never let you get out of yourself”. I often thought of that dream as of prophetic, but rather, it only warned me about what would happen if I continued to fantasize. In fact, I myself did not allow myself to get out from my mind – exactly like in the dream.

Of course, as you know, I had many dreams the events of which very strongly reflected what would be happening to me after some time.

The same applies to the dream I had a few years earlier. In it I was in the village, walking down the road to the spring. A woman with a dog was going in my direction. I was so afraid of the dog… that I did not see the big bear that, unlike the dog, posed the real danger.

That day after the dream I was walking by the lake and saw a girl with a big dog walking towards me in the distance. Next to her were two guys, one of whom was jumping in front of her. Ever since I was bitten twice by a friend’s long-haired dachshund in childhood, I tried to keep my distance from dogs, and this time was no exception. When I was walking close to the girl, she left two guys with the words “Oh Lord!” It became clear that they harassed her and did not allow her to pass. At the same time, they clearly believed that they were not doing anything wrong, not seeing how they appeared in the eyes of others. Then I saw how the father of my childhood friend walked nearby in my direction. We greeted each other, and those two guys saw this, as well as the expression on my twisted face – but I still did not understand that I had problems with facial expressions, as I forgot many things. I went further down the path and one of the guys started asking me about my long hair and about where he and his friend had wandered to. Another guy left to speak with the friend's father, pointing at me. After a couple of seconds, he started running fast towards me and with all his might he was going to hit me with his fist in the face, but at the last moment he changed the trajectory.

I politely said goodbye and calmly went on long the lake, and not quite adequate guys continued to pester other people who calmly and without disturbing anyone sunbathed in the sun.

I was able to guess what was said then by my friend’s father only a couple of years later, after meeting Marina.

Marina told me that she had a female friend who used to be single, and she only recently had found a boyfriend. I did not know who she was talking about. But there was one girl who I also often saw walking with her dog at my house, and I was thinking about coming up to her and getting to know her. In fact, I remembered how she stood and looked at me a few years earlier when I was waiting for my mother at the entrance to my house to help her withdraw money from an ATM. In any case, due to the lack of experience and certain knowledge, I was then not able to just make up my mind and approach a girl for a conversation.

I think this happened in the winter of 2017-2018. I walked home from a walk and decided to go not on the asphalt, but in the snow under the trees. I saw a large company of people with dogs. Among them was the same girl whom I was interested in, and the father of my friend. I greeted him and he answered mutually. At that moment, the girl asked him: “Who’s that?” – and his answer just struck me: “Дурачок” – (the word “idiot” would probably be the closest translation here).

It is so good that there was a lot of people there, and I continued to go home…

I had a lot of thoughts regarding that moment, and one of the most significant is that this person could have told me that I had some strange changes back when I was fourteen. Or any other time. But no. When meeting with me, no one said anything to my face, but when a young girl took an interest in me, it was necessary to say that very word, instead of just saying that my name was Zhenya, and I was a longtime friend of his son.

In fact, this applies to many of my friends. All of them could have told me that I had changed, that there was something wrong with the facial expressions of my face, and I needed to change the course of my thoughts. Then I remembered that the class teacher in the ninth grade was telling me exactly that, and a classmate immediately confirmed her words. Then there were other people who allowed themselves to talk unflatteringly about me. But I did not listen to them, because, firstly, I was offended by rudeness, not having the spiritual understanding that I have now, and secondly, I did not have the necessary material knowledge to change the course of my life.

This was the answer to why no one told me about my changes – they did not know that which I know now. They did not know about the Superior Intelligence and about the reasons for the creation of the Universe. They did not know about the duality of life, and that a person can be focused either on the present or on his inner world. They did not know that madness is a simple loss of control that can be restored by choosing to return one’s focus to the present moment of life; and meditation and concentration can assist the process. They did not know about the Law of the Universe that absolutely all errors must be repaid by suffering. They did not know about the existence of Michel Desmarquet’s book “Thiaoouba Prophecy”, nor about its veracity. And they did not know many other things.

Based on these understandings, it becomes clear that those people who already had certain spiritual knowledge could not help me because of the lack of necessary material knowledge, and those who did not have that spiritual knowledge were not afraid of the consequences of their bad, erroneous actions.

This understanding is the main reason why I subsequently decided to write this book – to convey to people my knowledge.

After the first reading of Thiaoouba Prophecy, I thought that I would not find a girl of similar spiritual affinity, since I did not think that they exist in the modern society of this planet. But I myself was not a very spiritual person, as it turned out. Again, the question arose about what I did in order to help people improve their material knowledge about the Universe, which as a result would help increase the level of spiritual knowledge in many people?

Of course, there were those who tried to somehow help me. So, one village friend told me: “Hold on. We are with you!” – after I stopped studying at the institute. But then I could not reconcile with how my life was going, as this would mean reconciling with the suffering, which, as it turned out later, was the result of my mistake. Had I reconciled, then most likely I would not have discovered the truth about many things. Then I also remember the status of the long-time friend in VK with, he said something like that someone complains about life and someone is looking for possibilities. I could also arm myself with this phrase.

As for the girl with the dog, some time after the death of my father, I decided to go up to her so as not to think about her much more. When during our conversation I asked her if she remembered that moment with the friend’s father, the girl walked away with a wry smile and without saying goodbye.

Then I also remembered how my uncle Vitya told me in childhood: “I don’t understand, are you an idiot!?” – I did not know then why he suddenly uttered that phrase that was not perceived as very offensive. I already had problems with my speech at that time, and I think that the imagination, which I remember was always a part of my life, played a role – I was often in my mind, and people saw it but did not understand the true reason for my “strange” look. If uncle Vitya knew what I knew, he would have most likely told me to be more relaxed and focused on reality.

***

I again began to watch streams of the streamer whom I had not watched for many months because of Alyona. Soon I saw a video, which someone shared in his group in VK, where he kissed Alyona. Then it became clear that they really were together for some time. But this news no longer hurt me in my soul. Due to the large number of dating attempts and other life understandings that I discovered in recent months, I was calm about the fact that someone had romantic relationships, but I did not. Moreover, I knew that they broke up, and the guy suffered for some time because of this. I remembered again that life has many shades of a wide variety of colors.

In conclusion of my one-sided story with Alyona, it is interesting to note that of the more than a hundred girls whom I approached to try to meet after Marina, none had dyed red hair.

After all the pain that I had to endure because of love, I thought for many months that I could never fall in love again. But then one day I was buying groceries in a store, and I saw a young woman with dark hair. At the first glance at her I felt that same feeling of inexplicable craving for her, a sense of love. She noticed me and hurried to leave. I do not know exactly what was the reason for her worry, but I have a couple of assumptions. My feeling of falling in love quickly faded away, but I learned that I can still feel love no matter what.

Closer to winter, my mother and I returned home after cleaning our father’s apartment. We got into a trolley bus where a teenage guy from the southern regions looked at me, wryly laughing. He told his friends something about the fact that this person is probably a homosexual (I do not include his swear words so that the book does not receive a large age rating). Of course, I knew that this was about me because, apparently, even the slightest loss in myself was still highlighted on my face.

This was an important moment for me, because for the first time I was able to not have any bad feelings, thoughts, and fantasies about an ignorant person, remembering everything that I realized over the years. I just realized once again the fact that I need to be in reality at 100%, and not at 99%, since people will see even the 1%. As for the guy himself, sooner or later life will punish him for his actions. I do not need to become an executioner, as this will be a mistake for which I will have to pay with suffering. Moreover, thanks to such people, others can understand that something is wrong with them and make appropriate adjustments in their lives in order to live happily, or even much happier – is this not the best punishment for the offender? Naturally, sooner or later the hour will come when the current ignoramuses themselves will begin to suffer for their mistakes, and then other ignorant people will help them in their spiritual growth. And then the story of life will be repeated again and again, and the cycle will continue until the Universe ceases to exist…

I was growing up spiritually, becoming able to calmly look at all the events of my life – both good and bad.

Another time, my mother and I returned home, and conductors entered the bus. I always placed the Troika card on the validator and therefore I was surprised when I was told that I did not pay the fare. I said that I placed the card, and the validator turned green, but did not squeak. An attractive conductor girl, laughing and looking askance at me, went to check the availability of money on the card. They were on the card. I asked to give me my card so that I could lean it against another validator and pay for the ride twice – we had already passed our stop, and I wanted to go out, as we were carrying heavy bags. I was refused, and my card was not returned to me. I was not allowed to buy a ticket either. A male conductor held me and did not let me go out of the bus. They wanted to write a fine of a thousand rubles. I refused to give my passport, and they said to go to the police station to establish my identity. Due to the presence of my mother and heavy bags, I gave them my passport after all and asked where I need to appeal the absolutely unlawful fine.

The address was written on the penalty receipt, and I had to go by the MCC to the Baltiyskaya station.

My path lay to Kosmonavta Volkova Street, and I was not at all surprised that I was destined to go past old familiar places where I used to go to visit my aunt.

I could not help but notice the peculiarity of Stalin's houses which pleased the eye with their architecture even in cloudy weather. This cannot be said about the Khrushchev houses and even about some modern houses.

In the building I needed, I was not the only one who wrote a statement to appeal the fine. There was a young couple next to me, and from their conversation it was clear that the controller simply did not let the girl, who just entered the transport, to approach the validator and wrote her a fine for no reason.

A few days later I received a message that my fine was canceled. Justice triumphed, and thanks to this unexpected experience, I learned something new about life and people. I do not know about the fate of inadequate conductors, but I am satisfied with the fact that sooner or later the Universal Law will make itself felt to them too.

I tried to remember that you should not give your card out of hand to anyone and you always need to keep your passport in your hands.

In January, I had my third time when I woke up in the middle of the night and had a clear realization in my head. Before going to bed that day, I was waiting for a stream of “The Witcher 3” video game from one girl, but she put a “host” on her friend, whom she was visiting. That friend calmly talked about all types of sex and talked about how she finally wanted to have already forgotten sex with an unfamiliar guy at the weekend. So, the thought in my head that night said that all beings (people) want and think about sex. I am not alone.

In confirmation of this, we can talk about the case when I woke up at night in an aroused state, could not help but think about sex, and could only fall asleep after masturbation. I went on the Internet to search for similar cases and found a story almost identical to my case in the English forum. At the end of the story, it became clear that the author of the post was a girl. So, all people want sex the same way. The gender does not matter.

On January 6, 2019, I had a dream about a parrot that I held tightly in my hands. The short version of the dream is that I walked with him in the village where my aunt once lived. I lovingly spoke with the parrot and showed him the surroundings, not seeing that the bird was looking around because it wanted to break out. I kissed his head and soon realized that I was squeezing the bird too much and loosened my grip. It was still light when the parrot spun in my hands, and I turned and walked back. When I came to the aunt's house, there was already total darkness. Holding the bird in one hand, I opened the gate with the other and realized that the bird was exhausted and became 1-3 centimeters long. In the house I exclaimed: “Why is there no cage!?” – as if it should have been there. I was looking for it, but could not find it. Blue light shone from the northwest side of the house, emanating from unknown source. I could not find where to put the parrot, and I could not just let him go, being afraid that he would fly away or get hurt. I thought to put him in a bowl for food, but was afraid to kill the bird by punching holes for air in the lid. I decided to cover the bird with some long plastic jar and attached it with tape to the table. In the end, I realized that the plastic cut the parrot into two parts in the process. He was still alive, and I did not know what to do… What remained of the parrot fell into the trash.

Thinking about the dream, I remembered about Thao's teachings that animals also have free will. Therefore, keeping animals in captivity is most likely a mistake in most cases.

At the beginning of February 2019, seeing that I was able to travel far and I felt good in general, both physically and psychologically, I agreed to translate Michel Desmarquet's book Thiaoouba Prophecy. In my free time, I began to translate the first two chapters to send the translation along with the synopsis and detailed plan of the book to book publishers.

Toward the end of February 2019, I helped my mom to digitize from VHS cassette the old village video made by my cousin when I was less than ten years old. It was already a late dark evening when I went outside from the photo studio. After walking only a few meters I was caught up by a person who began to ask me various everyday questions. We walked together, and I talked about my experience with programming. The person was clearly intrigued and asked me more details about my experience. Soon something happened that I could not have expected, although I was not surprised that I was destined to learn such truths that even I did not particularly believe in before. The person spoke about hacking activity and briefly mentioned reading thoughts, as well as participating in helping the American president win the presidential election. The person told me about the website where it would be possible to leave a request to work with them, if I wanted to, but I did not remember the address. In any case, all this was not for me and not for my morality and spirituality.