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Натали знала о себе много. В молодости ей понадобилась уйма времени, чтобы понять, что она сильно отличается от других людей. Эти другие часто не понимали её, считали странной, а она не всегда понимала их. К примеру, их потребности носить «маски», создавать какой-то иной образ для людей, имея ещё один для своего личного пользования. Непонятно! Натали всегда оставалась самой собой, в любой ситуации, в любой компании – такой же, какой была и наедине с собой и своими мыслями. Быть собой ей очень нравилось. В отличие от большинства людей, наша героиня не стремилась вернуться в какое-то иное время своей жизни, не тосковала по прошлому, не грезила о других столетиях и ни за что не хотела бы поменяться местами с кем-то, проживать чужую жизнь. Быть собой, жить здесь и сейчас, благодарить за каждое мгновенье, таким, пожалуй, было её невысказанное мотто.
И ещё одной непонятной вещью оказалась «виртуальная реальность». Ну, какая же она виртуальная? Самая что ни на есть реальная реальность, такая же, как мир наших чувств, мыслей, эмоций, как наши планы и наши мечты. Да, руками не потрогаешь, не обнимешь, не поцелуешь… Но эти ограничения не следствия «другой» особой реальности, а обусловлены расстоянием, которое разделяет их, друзей или влюблённых, как ни назови. Да, как ни назови, сути это не меняет – как со временем они стали близки с Аднаном, так теперь стремительно и неудержимо сближались с Амиром. Как она для него, так и он для неё становились частью жизни. Самой что ни на есть реальной реальностью.
[16.10.2010 19:40:21] Amir: Hi love i am back
Natalie: very well :)
Amir: i love you!..
Natalie: Amir!… you can?t really love me cause you don?t know me and haven?t seen me yet, so plz stop repeat it all the time
Amir: this is the only reality i know now and i love you a lot, i have seen you and…
Natalie: When will you find your microphone?
Amir: i will go to market tomorrow
Natalie: you’ve told me same before!
Amir: yea i know, i am sorry i was not able to do that
Natalie: what’s the problem?
Amir: honey i am sorry
Natalie: ok
Amir: i love you a lot
Natalie: Amir! what can I tell on this, plz stop! we will see each other first… let’s talk about something else… by the way I am not divorced yet, so have to do that
Amir: so what are you waiting for?
Natalie: I can?t do it while I’m here, only when I am in Estonia… I wanted to do before, but it just wasn?t important
Amir: ok, no problem, take your time and divorce your husband… you there?
Natalie: yes, see if my comp switch on I am like always here, but in fact I can do some other matters… just skype shows me online… then I just watch some video or visit some sites while you are keeping silent :)
Amir: because i want to see your beautiful face 24 hours
Natalie: impossible! you have to sleep and do other matters.. so I beg you don?t get crazy really, it is not wise! you have to wait for 2 months
Amir: honey i wana see you so please open your cam
*** Call to Amir, duration 00:55. ***
Amir: you are so lovely
Amir: which song?
Amir: nope
Amir: can you add it to your profile?
*** Call ended ***
Amir: well i love that «Ten black roses», it’s an awesome song
Natalie: all songs of The Rasmus are great… almost, but I like the most… Shot, Host of Love, well about 10… this song I am listening now is not of the Rasmus and lyrics is not really good but when I am in good mood somehow I like the song! I will send it now so check after some min
Amir: ok can you add this video to your profile?
Amir: love
Natalie: well I am trying to find the best video, but can?t, just will send the song, you know it, I am sure, it is rather well known
Amir: ok
Natalie: watch, I’ve sent but I will delete it, I don?t like it in my profile
Amir: honey wait, i will add it on my profile
Natalie: no, it is not good song really! just it makes me feel like a bit crazy
Amir: cam plzzzz
Amir: hellooooooooooo
Amir: cam plzzzz and don’t close it
Amir: please don’t say no
Amir: plzzzzzzzzz plzzzzzzzzz plzzzzzzz plzzzzzzzzzz plzzzzzzzz plzzzzzzzzzz plzzzzzzzzz
plzzzzzzzz
Natalie: i can’t stay with open cam all the time, it is take power of my laptop, it is not so strong! :
Amir: plzzzz
Amir: plzzzzzzz
*** Call to Amir, duration 00:38. ***
Amir: don’t close
Amir: please please please please
Amir: please
Amir: don’t you like if i see you
Amir: please Natalie
*** Call ended ***
Amir: :( what is VOVA doing? very busy kid
Natalie: what do you want of him now? he spends his time almost like you
Amir: can i tell him that i like his mother and i want to marry you
Natalie: of course! it is your matter what you will tell him, you may try to build some relations with him… he likes music most of all
Amir: hmmmmmmmm i know, i am trying but i don’t know about music that he likes
Natalie: then he likes to meet his friends and spend time with them in the same manner like you – movies, talks… whole night :) you can ask him about music… don?t be afraid, he is very easy to communicate
Amir: well then we will be best friends for sure
Natalie: it’s just he doesn?t trust you now as I did in the beginning
Amir: yea, i know, don’t worry, we will have great relations, me and Vova
Natalie: he needs it I think… his grandfather was always with him :) but he needs more I think, especially now, in this age
Amir: ok i am here for him, don’t worry
Natalie: we can speak with him almost about everything, but man?s opinion and mind a bit different and here are things I just can?t tell or can?t help with… so thanks!
Amir: i am here for him love, don’t worry, i will be a good friend as well as a good father
Natalie: but don?t think too much about him, he has own life, own friends and girlfriends :)
Amir: ok, yea i know, i am just thinking about you, only you
Natalie: he is glad I am now not with him. He wants more freedom :) and I also want something… I told you before… I want a baby, because my son soon won?t need me as much as before…
Amir: ok let’s make a baby… after coming close… after knowing each other… after passing time together
Natalie: do you like kids in general?
Amir: yea, kids are like angels
Natalie: he is talking to me now, my son, so wait a bit
Amir: ok
Amir: so tell me what are you talking about?
Natalie: about you too and about other matters, he wants just to speak to me
Amir: ok no problem, take your time, i am waiting for you, just send me message when you will be free
[16.10.201* 20:28:24] Natalie: ok
[16.10.201* 20:32:08] Natalie: it is not so easy to stop him! :) it was the same when I was at home
Amir: what happened?
Natalie: sometimes in evening he wants to speak too much and I want to sleep :)
Amir: hahahahahahha, i love you princess
Natalie: look, he is calling again, sorry
Amir: well he is a kid so just don’t worry
Natalie: well, I am free, he will go out with his friends soon on half a night to run a disco
Amir: waooo cool, DJ, i am impressed
Natalie: yes, he works as DJ for 2 years now on weekends
Amir: great
Amir: i wana see your hands
Natalie: yes, but I don?t like he is not at home at night, however our place is almost safety but I am a mother, so I prefer him to be at home at night… my hands?
Amir: i can understand mother’s feelings… yes, i wana see your hands
*** Call to Amir, duration 00:51. ***
Amir: both hands
Amir: nope
Amir: what happened?
Amir: ok
Amir: yes
*** Call ended ***
Amir: i was thinking about an engagement ring so that’s why i asked you to show me your hands
