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The Christmas Bouquet
“Are you absolutely sure they don’t already know that something’s up?” he asked. “With us, anyway.”
“Did you not hear what I just said about my stepfather and my grandfather?” she asked impatiently. “If either of them had a clue, you’d be a dead man.”
Noah couldn’t believe she was right about their likely reaction. “Come on, Cait. You’re in your twenties. You’ve been away at school for years now. Surely they can’t believe there’s never been a man in your life.”
She finally smiled, the tension in her shoulders visibly easing. “Well, they knew about Ronnie Jessup in fourth grade,” she told him. “That was after we moved from New York to Chesapeake Shores. He sent me a dozen valentines that year. Grandpa Mick immediately wanted to have a talk with his parents, but Nell stopped him. And my mom managed to keep Trace from following me to my high school prom. I’m pretty sure Grandpa Mick was lurking around somewhere in the shadows, though.”
Noah laughed, then realized she was serious. “They’re that protective?”
“Carrie and I were the first grandchildren. Grandpa Mick might have gone a little overboard. While I can’t imagine building my entire life around dating the way Carrie has, she might have had the right idea. She’s trained them to deal with it. I was the responsible, serious one. I was in love with my books. I probably lulled them into a false sense of complacency thinking I’d never do anything outrageous. This is going to come as a huge shock to them.”
“Oh, boy,” Noah whispered, then regarded her with a renewed sense of determination. “Sweetie, we need to get this over with. Neither of us is on duty this weekend. It’s the perfect time to go to Chesapeake Shores.”
“But I have to study,” she protested.
He met her gaze. “With all of this on your mind, do you actually think you’re going to be able to concentrate?”
“I can always concentrate,” she insisted.
Noah thought that actually might be true, but he shook his head. “Cait, I won’t have your parents or anyone else thinking I’m reckless and irresponsible or that I’ve treated you carelessly. That would be a terrible way to be introduced to any family, but especially to one as protective as yours. I want them to like me or at least to accept me.”
“Noah—” she began.
Since a protest was undoubtedly coming, he cut her off. “I know how much you love and respect your family. If you’re determined to stay here and avoid this, go right ahead, but I’m going to speak to them. They need to know my intentions are honorable, even if we ultimately decide not to get married.”
She looked stricken by his vehemence. “You wouldn’t.”
“I would,” he told her solemnly. “I love you, Cait. More than that, I respect you. I’d like to prove I’m worthy of your family’s respect, too. They need to know that I’ll do whatever it takes to protect and support you and our child.” He lightened his tone. “And if you’re right about your grandfather and stepdad beating me to a pulp, at least I’ll have time to heal before our child gets his or her first look at me.”
She scowled. “That’s not even remotely amusing.” She sat down beside him and wove her fingers through his. “Look, I love you for wanting to stand beside me and face my family, but maybe that’s not the best idea.” She drew in a deep breath, then conceded, “You are right about one thing, though. I should probably go down there this weekend and fill them in on what’s going on, even get some of Nell’s sage advice. The whole family relies on her to put things into perspective.”
Noah frowned, not entirely pleased about her plan. “And then you’ll do what? Come back here and announce your decision to me?”
She winced at his caustic tone. “No, of course not. We’ll decide this together. I promise. Going home will help me to think everything through, though. I’m reeling right now. I need this space, Noah. You know how I am. I ponder things, especially important decisions, and I won’t be able to do that with you watching me every second. Please don’t push to go with me.”
He nodded finally, reluctantly accepting her decision. “As long as you swear you’ll come back and talk it over with me before you do anything crazy.”
She obviously knew what he meant by crazy, because she rested her hand against his cheek, tears in her eyes again.
“There won’t be an abortion, Noah. That much I do know. I swear it.”
A wave of relief washed over him at the sincerity he heard in her voice, at the commitment shining in her eyes. He knew he could trust her to keep her word. Now he just had to pray that whatever went on with her family would work in his favor.
2
With every mile that brought her closer to Chesapeake Shores, the knot of dread in Caitlyn’s stomach seemed to tighten. It was the first time ever she hadn’t been eager to get back to see her large rambunctious family. They could be overwhelming at times, but she’d grown up never doubting how much she was loved. In fact, that had given her the strength and confidence to choose the path she’d chosen for her future. She’d known there were too many children in the world who didn’t have that powerful support system, who didn’t even have the basic necessities.
She’d spent most of the drive trying not only to summon the courage to reveal her secret, but trying to decide the first person she should tell. There was little question that her mother would empathize. She’d had to make her share of difficult decisions to balance love and career and family. She’d even given up her dream job as a successful stockbroker in New York to take over the Baltimore office of her brokerage company so she could be closer to Chesapeake Shores and her new family with Trace.
Caitlyn pulled to the side of the road. She drew in a deep breath, then hit speed dial on her cell phone. When her mom’s delighted voice filled the car, she immediately felt her anxiety ease.
“Hey, sweetheart, how are you?” her mother asked. “I’ve been thinking about you a lot this week. We miss you.”
“I miss you, too,” Caitlyn said. “As a matter of fact, I’m on my way home. Are you in Chesapeake Shores or at the Baltimore office?”
“Lucky for you, I’ve been working from home today,” Abby said. “Why didn’t you let us know you were coming? I’d have cooked.”
Caitlyn laughed. “No, you wouldn’t. You would have called Aunt Jess and asked her to send over some food from the Inn at Eagle Point,” she teased. “There’s still time to do that. I’m about thirty minutes away. I could pick it up.”
“What a great idea! Why don’t you do that. I’ll call Jess as soon as I get off the phone.” She hesitated. “Caitlyn, are you sure everything’s okay? You never pop in unexpectedly like this. You always let us know when you’re coming. Has something happened at the hospital? Is your work going okay? Medical school’s not getting to be too much for you, is it?”
“Everything’s fine,” Caitlyn assured her automatically. She forced herself to amend that. “But maybe you and I could find a little time to talk after dinner. I’d like your advice about something.”
“Now I’m really worried,” Abby said, only half in jest. “I’ll tell Jess we’re going to need one of those chocolate decadence cakes to go along with some serious conversation.”
Caitlyn laughed despite her somber mood. “You always want one of those cakes. I’ve just given you the perfect excuse to order it without guilt. You can blame all those calories on me.”
“Too true,” her mom said. “My hips won’t thank you, but I do. See you soon.”
Caitlyn disconnected the call and sighed. There, she thought. She’d laid the groundwork. She doubted, though, that in her wildest dreams her mother could possibly imagine the news that she was coming home to share.
* * *
Noah didn’t have a lot of buddies, at least not the kind he could call and join for a beer and a serious discussion about what was going on in his life. He had a few basketball pals, but their conversations were superficial and mostly limited to medicine and sports. On top of that, they were rarely available on a Friday night. If they weren’t on duty at the hospital, they’d be home with their families or out on dates.
Since he knew he’d probably lose his mind sitting around his apartment and waiting for word from Caitlyn, he switched rotations with one of the other residents and went to the hospital for the Friday-night shift.
Thankfully, it was a quiet start to the weekend, because his concentration was shot. He knew he was in bad shape when the head nurse on duty pulled him aside after rounds.
“What’s with you, Noah?” Jill Marshall asked. “I’ve known you since the first day you set foot in this hospital, and it’s the first time I’ve ever seen you be abrupt with a patient.” She gave him a long look, then added, “Ray Simpson.”
He regarded her with dismay and went over his conversation with Ray in his head. He winced when he realized she was right. He’d practically cut the man off in midsentence.
“I’ll go back in there and apologize,” he said at once. “I have a lot on my mind, but I shouldn’t be taking it out on a patient.”
“It must be pretty serious,” she said, regarding him worriedly. “How about a cup of coffee instead? I’m a good listener. Maybe you should get this off your chest before you tick off another patient. You can go back to see Mr. Simpson afterward. He’s in traction. He isn’t going anywhere.”
Since Jill was in her fifties and had been a head nurse long before he’d turned up at the hospital as a green intern, Noah knew the offer was well-meant. She might treat the physicians with the utmost respect, but she mothered the med students, interns and even the residents. If anything other than Caitlyn’s pregnancy were on his mind, he’d accept her offer eagerly. She’d proven herself to be a good sounding board on many occasions.
“I could probably use the coffee,” he admitted. “But can we skip the heart-to-heart?”
She frowned at that. “How am I supposed to help if you won’t tell me what’s worrying you?”
“Just knowing you care helps a lot,” he said.
She rolled her eyes at that, but led the way to the empty nurses’ lounge and poured them both cups of coffee strong enough to keep the most exhausted person on staff wide-awake and alert.
“I thought you took this weekend off so you and Caitlyn could have some time together,” she commented as she handed him his coffee.
Noah chuckled at her attempt at an innocent interrogation. “Something came up. She had to drive down to Chesapeake Shores to see her family.”
“And you didn’t want to go along? You had the time off, after all.”
“It wasn’t the right time,” he said.
She gave him a direct look. “Okay, I know I’m butting in here, but are the two of you serious or not?”
“We are,” he said a little too emphatically.
“Then I really don’t get it. Have you even met her family? They live practically up the street.”
“It’s a little farther away than that,” he responded, then sighed. “But I know what you mean. It’s complicated.”
“Complicated how?”
“I can’t explain it,” he admitted.
“Because she won’t explain it to you,” Jill guessed. “Noah, you know we all love Caitlyn to pieces. She’s going to be an incredible physician, every bit as talented as you. Personally, I think the two of you are perfect for each other. But if she’s holding you at arm’s length, whatever her reasons for it, maybe you need to think about moving on. It’s not normal for a woman supposedly in love to be deliberately keeping you away from her family.”
She allowed that to sink in, then added, “You’re an incredible man. I know a half-dozen women on staff who’d give their right arms to have you glance at them twice. Believe me, any one of them would be thrilled to drag you home to meet Mom and Dad.”
Noah appreciated what she was saying, but he wasn’t interested. “That’s very flattering, but Caitlyn’s the one for me.”
She held his gaze and asked gently, “But are you the one for her?”
“I am,” he said readily.
He had to be, he told himself. Especially now.
* * *
Caitlyn managed to get through dinner with her mother and Trace without giving anything away. She even played with her little half brother, Patrick Donovan Riley, for a few minutes before he went down for the night. Her last words as she tucked him in were, “Don’t you dare let Grandpa Mick insist on calling you Paddy, okay? It should be enough for Grandpa that your cousin Luke has an Irish pub called O’Brien’s right here in town. We don’t need to be obsessive about the whole Irish thing.”
“’Kay,” he mumbled sleepily as his eyes drifted shut.
She lingered in his room, trying to imagine herself with a child his age in a few years. How crazy would that be? And how on earth would it work if she were in some isolated part of the world? Would Noah insist that their child remain with him wherever he located and opened his practice? Was that one of the possibilities? Could she accept being separated from her child, even temporarily? And what about Noah? Could she live with being separated from him? Until now it had seemed a distant problem, one it would be years before she had to resolve. Now it was all too depressingly complicated with no obvious solutions, at least none she’d managed to come up with on her own.
When she got downstairs, she found her mother in the kitchen, putting the last of the dishes into the dishwasher.
“Where’s Trace?” Caitlyn asked.
“I told him we wanted some mother-daughter time,” Abby replied. “How about going for a walk? It’s a mild night for this time of year. After the endless winter we’ve had that dragged on through April, I can almost believe that spring is finally right around the corner.”
“It’s a little too dark for a walk on the beach,” Caitlyn responded, regretting that. She’d done some of her best thinking and planning on the shores of the Chesapeake Bay.
“We could walk along the road into town, burn off a few calories from that cake,” her mother suggested. “We could even grab a cup of coffee or shop. I imagine one or two of the stores are still open, even though most of them won’t start extending their hours for the summer season until Memorial Day weekend.”
Caitlyn smiled. Her mom had always loved shopping, a trait she shared with Grandma Megan. She’d been in heaven living in New York. There was no comparison in Chesapeake Shores certainly, even though the small downtown area was thriving.
“We can certainly window-shop at least,” Caitlyn agreed. “No more food, that’s for sure. That cake is so rich I may not eat for the rest of the weekend.”
“You’ll eat at Grandpa Mick’s on Sunday,” her mother said. “Otherwise, you’ll never hear the end of it. He’ll lecture you on insulting Nell.”
“Don’t I know it,” Caitlyn said. “Besides, sometimes I actually crave Gram’s pot roast and her chicken and dumplings and her Irish stew.”
“Any preference for Sunday? I’m sure she’ll make whatever you ask her for.”
“Irish stew,” Caitlyn said at once. “I tried making it myself a couple of weeks ago. It was awful, and I know I followed the recipe you gave me.”
Her mom winced. “Maybe you should have gotten it directly from Gram. You know how I am about things like that. I could have left off half the ingredients. To her everlasting dismay, your uncle Kevin is the only one in the family who inherited Gram’s skill in the kitchen.”
Caitlyn shook her head. “That would explain the disaster, all right. My stew was all but inedible.”
“I’ve already called to tell her you’re here. I’ll let her know first thing in the morning about Sunday dinner,” her mom promised. “Shall I tell her you’ll be stopping by for a cooking lesson in the meantime?”
“That would be great,” Caitlyn said at once. It would give her time alone with Nell to get some much-needed perspective to go right along with the recipe.
Abby grabbed a jacket off a peg by the kitchen door. “You ready for that walk?”
Caitlyn plucked her own jacket off a peg and left the house with her mother. The night air was brisk, even for May, but there was a full moon that cast a stream of silvery light across the Chesapeake Bay just below the road.
They walked the first half mile or so in silence until Caitlyn couldn’t stand it any longer.
“How’s work?” she asked.
“Challenging,” Abby replied. “Handling the job full-time now with Patrick seems a lot harder than it did when you and Carrie were his age. It doesn’t make sense since there were two of you.”
“That’s because we were little angels,” Caitlyn said wryly, knowing perfectly well that she and her sister had been anything but angelic.
Her mom laughed. “As if, but it’s true that Patrick’s a real handful. Trace is a trouper, but he’s more in demand for graphic design work than ever, especially for these new start-up web companies. Even though he works at home, it’s hard for him to juggle work and child care. Thank goodness for kindergarten. He manages a few uninterrupted hours of work before Patrick gets home.”
“You could afford help,” Caitlyn suggested.
“And have your grandfather complain that strangers are raising his grandson?”
“It’s not as if he has a lot of room to talk,” Caitlyn reminded her. “Didn’t he leave Nell to raise you and the rest of his kids when he and Grandma Megan were apart?”
“But Nell is his mother. He’d say it’s not the same.”
“Then tell him he can step in and babysit Patrick.”
“Oh, no,” her mom protested at once. “That child is stubborn enough without letting my father influence him on a daily basis.”
Caitlyn laughed, well aware of her grandfather’s personality. Stubborn was just the tip of the iceberg. Controlling and meddling also came to mind. “I can see how that would be worrisome,” she said.
Silence fell again until they reached downtown Chesapeake Shores. The shops were all closed, but one or two of the restaurants along Shore Road appeared to be open.
“Panini Bistro?” Caitlyn asked.
“That works for me,” her mother said, leading the way inside and heading for a table in the back.
There were a few other tables occupied, but they were far enough away that their conversation wouldn’t be overheard. As soon as they had cups of decaf coffee in front of them and Caitlyn had taken her time adding sugar and cream, her mother reached over and covered her hand.
“Talk,” she said gently. “Whatever’s going on, you know you can tell me. Is medical school not going well? Are you having second thoughts about medicine?”
It was interesting that her mother had focused on her career first. Clearly she understood it was the most important thing in Caitlyn’s life.
Caitlyn shook her head. “Work at the hospital is good. And I’ll never change my mind about medicine and what I want for my future. That’s part of the problem.”
“How so?”
Tears welled up in Caitlyn’s eyes. Unable to bear the thought of the disappointment she might see on her mom’s face, she looked down at the table and whispered, “I’m going to have a baby.”
There wasn’t even an instant of shock or hesitation from her mom. “Oh, sweetheart,” she said, squeezing Caitlyn’s hand tightly. “That’s wonderful news!”
Caitlyn looked up and spotted the tears in her mother’s eyes and realized her words were totally sincere. Among the O’Briens, babies were a blessing, no matter what.
“Seriously? You’re not disappointed in me?”
“I could never be disappointed in you,” Abby replied fiercely. “You’re brilliant and loving and the best daughter imaginable.”
“But this is something Carrie would do, not me.”
Her mother actually chuckled at that. “It’s true that it might be less of a shock coming from your sister, but that doesn’t mean it’s not wonderful. Tell me about the father. Why haven’t you mentioned that you’re with someone special?”
“How do you know it’s someone special?” Caitlyn asked, amazed by her mother’s perceptiveness.
“Because you’re you,” Abby said, a smile on her lips. “If I know nothing else about you, I know you don’t have casual flings. Given how focused you’ve been about school and your career, I can’t imagine you’d get involved with anyone if he weren’t really important.”
“That’s true,” Caitlyn said, grateful for the vote of confidence.
“Any particular reason you haven’t mentioned him before?”
Caitlyn flushed. “You know how Grandpa Mick and Trace would get. The whole family, for that matter. Add in what happened at Jenny’s wedding and Grandpa Mick would never leave us in peace. Catching that bouquet all but signaled that there’d be a wedding in my future. If he knew about Noah, he’d have a date scheduled on the church calendar. I didn’t want to subject Noah or myself to the pressure.”
Her mother smiled. “No question Dad would pile on the pressure,” she agreed. “But you’ve always been able to handle that. Did you think your young man wouldn’t be able to?”
“Not at all. Noah is incredible,” Caitlyn confided to her. “He’s smart and funny and gorgeous. He’s finishing his residency in family medicine next month.”
“He sounds perfect for you.” She studied Caitlyn with a penetrating look. “Am I wrong about that?”
She shook her head. “No, he is perfect. It’s the timing of all this. He wants to get married.”
“Let me guess. You don’t.”
“Not because I don’t love Noah,” she said quickly. “I do. More than anything. And I want this baby.”
“But marriage and a baby weren’t part of the plan,” her mother said, holding her gaze. “The one you thought through so carefully and wrote down before you even finished high school.”
Caitlyn nodded. “That was the plan, all right. This was supposed to happen years from now. After I’d accomplished everything I wanted to accomplish,” she stressed.
Her mother regarded her with sympathy. “Oh, my poor girl, I can totally relate to how you’re feeling. I know all about plans and how disconcerting it is when they go awry. I was just getting started as a stockbroker in New York when I met your father. I had this fast-paced timetable for success, and believe me, there was no room in that for a man, much less marriage and a family.”
Caitlyn chuckled. It sounded so familiar and oddly reassuring. Her mother had figured out a solution. Perhaps she could, too.
“But bad timing or not, there was your father,” her mom continued. “He was very determined and persuasive. Eventually he overrode all of my objections and convinced me to get married. I figured I could juggle marriage and work okay, no problem. I am, after all, an incredible multitasker.”
Caitlyn laughed. “So you’ve always claimed.”
“I am,” her mother repeated with a hint of indignation. “My point is that I adjusted my plan and it was working very smoothly.” She sighed. “At least until I discovered I was pregnant with twins.”
After a moment, she continued. “You know the rest. Your father wanted me to quit work and be a full-time mother. When I refused, we fought. Endlessly, as a matter of fact, until there was no other choice but to get a divorce. Then I had two babies and a full-time career. I panicked, but I did it. You’ll be able to do it, too. You’ll make whatever adjustments are necessary. You have my genes, after all.”
“I’ve been to med school,” Caitlyn reminded her. “I know genetics will only get me so far.”
“Well, you have the O’Brien grit and determination going for you, too,” she added. “What does Noah have to say about all this? Beyond wanting to get married, that is.”
“He says we can figure the rest out, but I don’t see how. The only way I see it working is if I give up on my dream and settle for practicing medicine in some traditional way, rather than going overseas.”
“Did Noah insist you abandon everything you’ve worked for? If he did, perhaps he doesn’t know you as well as he should. The right man would be incredibly proud of your dedication.”
“Noah would never insist on something like that, even if it’s what he really wants. Sure, he’d be thrilled if I finished up in a few years and went into practice with him, but he does get where I’m coming from. He’s always been incredibly supportive. If there’s a way for me to do what I’ve always hoped to do, he’ll back me. I’m the one who’s not seeing any alternative but sacrificing the one thing that’s been driving me for years now. I feel as if I’m caught up in one of those either-or moments.”