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“Of course I did.” A fresh wave of color came into her face. “He was nice!”
“I mean as a boyfriend,” Tyler clarified.
She lifted her shoulders in a stubborn little shrug. “What if I did?”
Tyler stepped nearer. “Then I’d have to say I severely misjudged you because I never envisioned you spending time with the most anal, numbers-driven guy I’ve ever come across in my life.”
He’d never really expected her to give any guy—except him—the time of day, given the solitary way she had been living her life.
“Gary Hecht is an actuary. What did you expect?”
“I don’t know,” Tyler said drily. He paused to look deep into Susie’s eyes. “At the very least, I figured there would have been some conversation about the great November weather.”
“Well, now that would have been thrilling,” Susie sassed back, mocking Tyler’s sober tone.
“Certainly,” Tyler continued critically, trying to impress upon Susie the need to raise her standards. “It would have been laudable if there had been a lot less talk about Gary Hecht and his interests and more focus on you.”
Susie shook her head at Tyler as if she could not believe his stupidity. She stepped nearer, not stopping until they stood toe-to-toe and nose to nose. “Did it ever occur to you that I did not want Gary Hecht to focus on me?”
That had certainly been his wish, Tyler thought. It should not have been Susie’s. “Exchanging information—one’s likes and dislikes—is part of dating, Suze.”
Susie’s expression turned smug. “It wasn’t dating,” she informed him sweetly, batting her eyelashes Texas-belle style once again. “It was an introduction.”
Tyler didn’t know whether to be relieved nothing of any import had happened between Susie and Gary Hecht after all, or ticked off that Susie was goading him deliberately, trying to get a rise out of him. Or that it was working.
“Same thing, from the looks of it,” Tyler muttered back.
“No,” Susie countered patiently. “It wasn’t.” She paused a moment to let her words sink in. “I went tonight to pacify my parents. And because I wanted him to do a favor for me. Which, by the way, no thanks to you and your distracting presence, Gary readily agreed to do!”
Tyler tried not to be too thrilled that he had disrupted her powers of concentration as much as she had disrupted his this evening. “What kind of favor?” he asked.
Susie huffed, becoming difficult once again. “I’m not telling.”
Tyler thought of all the ways he could force the information out of her. Kissing her, being the prime one.
“Is that so?” he countered back, his temper inching ever higher.
Amber eyes flashed. “You better believe it is.”
Ignoring her sarcasm, he continued searching her face. “Don’t you think you are being a little bit childish?”
She glared at him in resentment and splayed a hand across his chest. “You’re one to talk! This whole discussion is absolutely stupid and juvenile and pointless and—”
Tyler had heard enough. Doing what he had wanted to do from the first moment he had laid eyes on her at the driving range this evening, he wrapped his arms around her, brought her close, lowered his head, and fastened his lips over hers. It had been an eternity since he had kissed her. Too long. All he knew was that in this moment she was everything he had ever wanted, everything he had never had. Not in any way that counted, since the two of them had made sure that every previous clinch they had shared in the last twenty-four hours had gone absolutely nowhere….
Whereas this kiss…this kiss felt as if it was going somewhere. And it was more than just the softness of her lips, or the peppermint taste of her mouth, the softness of her breasts molding against his chest, or the feel of her hands clasping the back of his neck. It was the way she was kissing him back. As if there was no tomorrow. As if there had never been a yesterday. As if this moment was all that counted, or would ever matter.
As Tyler brought Susie closer still, he knew she was right.
Tonight was all that mattered.
In so many ways, Susie was all that mattered.
Which was why he knew he had to honor their previous promise to each other and stop now, before this went any further, and the two of them ended up in bed together, again.
Calling upon every ounce of gentlemanly restraint he possessed, Tyler let the kiss come to a halt. Slowly, he lifted his head and looked into her eyes.
And even more reluctantly, let her go.
They drew apart, much more slowly than they had ever come together. Susie had that dazed look in her eyes that was at once both deeply satisfied and yearning for more. It destroyed him every time. Tonight was no exception. He wanted her more than ever, even as he knew full well all the reasons why they should never ever be more than crisis buddies.
To do otherwise, to pretend he would always be there for her…in the way that she needed…to pretend they could ever be as emotionally close as she needed her potential soul mate to be…was pure fallacy.
Tyler knew his shortcomings.
He was not going to inflict them on Susie.
He was not ever going to put her in a position where he would hurt her, the way she had once been hurt before.
The kiss…well, the kiss had been a way to end the argument before it went too far, and either of them said or did anything they would later regret, Tyler reasoned, even as guilt washed over him, anew.
Susie stepped back, and shoved her hands through her silky blond hair.
Having recovered completely from the unexpected intimacy of the moment, she stomped her foot. “Now why did you go and do a darn fool thing like that?”
Tyler shrugged.
“Because I wanted to end the argument and that was the fastest way I knew how.”
Susie’s eyes took on a turbulent sheen. Her lower lip slid out into a delicious pout. “I thought we agreed…”
Tyler’s gut tightened. “We wouldn’t fall into bed again.”
She nodded, her expression as solemn—and worried—as her mood. “It could ruin our whole crisis management system, Tyler.”
A system, Tyler knew, Susie depended upon. The truth was, there had been times when Tyler really needed Susie, too. Times when she had come to his rescue.
Been there. Done what needed to be done, said what needed to be said. And then left, as soon as he was on an even keel again. Had it not been for her…
He doubted he would have survived those dark times as well as he had.
“You know I’m right,” Susie persisted, her voice taking on a more normal sound.
That was the hell of it. On some level, Tyler did know.
On another…
“We set those boundaries with each other for a reason,” Susie continued firmly.
Boundaries Tyler now wished—as he did every time he ended up kissing Susie—that they could take down.
“Well?” Susie prodded with a discreet lift of her brow.
A discreet lift that said she was much more relaxed about what had just happened between the two of them than he was.
She waited for his response.
Before Tyler could reply the pager at his waist went off.
He looked at the number flashing across the screen, frowned.
Susie sighed and guessed, “Emergency?”
“I hope not,” Tyler groused, shoving a hand through his hair. “I don’t want anything ruining our dinner plans.”
He didn’t want their evening ending with Susie still in a mood to regret—or was it simply dismiss—their impetuous and forbidden kiss.
Eyes locked with hers, he answered the call. Listened intently. “No problem,” Tyler said when the caller had finished. “I’ll be right there.”
“So much for brisket, I guess,” Susie lamented as he shut off the phone and put it back on his belt.
Tyler scoffed as he headed back to his truck. He reached into the compartment behind the seat, and pulled out a rumpled tan chambray shirt from the pile of clean laundry there.
He stripped off the ugly green-white-and-orange striped golf shirt, then stood there a minute, naked from the waist up, as he put the shirt that was inside out to rights.
“I was really looking forward to treating us both to some fine Texas barbecue. Another time then, I guess.”
Tyler grinned. “Are you kidding me?” Pulse racing, he shoved his arms through the sleeves of the shirt and buttoned the soft rumpled cotton cloth from the bottom up. “You’re not getting off the hook that easily, missy.” Now that he had her full attention, he let his gaze meet and hold hers. “You’re going on this vet call with me.”
Chapter Three
To get more out of life, give more of yourself.
It wasn’t the first time Susie had seen Tyler without a shirt, she ruminated as she and Tyler drove to see Tyler’s equine patient. She and Tyler’d been swimming together, for heaven’s sake. But treading water wasn’t what she thought about when she saw his broad muscular shoulders, taut pecs and strong abs.
She thought about what it would be like to be his woman. She thought about the last time they had made love. She thought about how quickly they undressed whenever they fell into each other’s arms and how swiftly they put their clothes back on when reality hit them over the heads and the passion was spent. She thought about the wistful yearning she always suffered afterward. How she wished she and he had the kind of relationship where they could cuddle and share pillow talk and make love whenever they pleased, however much they pleased. She wished they could have the kind of relationship where they saw each other and hung out together all the time, even when their lives were excessively dull.
Unfortunately, that hadn’t been the case in the past, and for reasons far beyond their control, would not be so in the future.
Susie exhaled in frustration.
She needed to get a grip.
Stop letting her parents’ constant talk of love and romance and finding the perfect man to settle down with fill her head with romantic notions. She needed to be practical. And a realistic assessment of her recent actions indicated that she had completely overreacted to Tyler’s showing up early at the driving range. True, he’d had no business hovering over her like a chaperone intent on breaking up the first sign of familiarity, but she knew he had meant well, even if he had been ridiculously overprotective.
What really annoyed her was how traitorous and guilty his mere presence had made her feel.
It wasn’t as if she had been cheating on him, or was being unfaithful to him in any way. Sure, the two of them had impetuously crossed the line from friends to lovers four times in the past decade. Each time, they had promised themselves and each other there wouldn’t be a next time.
Each time, there had been a very good reason.
The first time they had come together like that had been on her twenty-first birthday. She was feeling sorry for herself, thinking that because of her illness, and the possibility it may come back, she would never get close enough to anyone to make love. Tyler had told her she was wrong, and the next thing they knew they had ended up in her dorm room bed. She had pushed him away afterward, accepting that it never should have happened.
The second time had been four years later, when he had passed his boards and gotten his license to practice veterinary medicine. He’d called her, wanting to celebrate. They’d had way too many margaritas. And somehow ended up in bed, again. That time they’d fallen asleep afterward. They’d awakened at dawn, hung over, happy—about his success—but mortified by their lapse in judgment.
It had been awkward for them for a while. They were both embarrassed by the sheer physical abandon with which they’d given themselves to each other. But eventually they’d chalked it up to an alcoholic and joyful aberration and gone back to being crisis buddies once again.
Which of course was how the third time had come about, several years after that.
One of Tyler’s college friends had been killed in an accident, and he’d been devastated by his buddy’s death. Susie had gone to the funeral in Corpus Christi with Tyler and they’d ended up talking in their hotel room late into the night. Tyler had been so sad, so devastated, it had seemed only right that Susie reach out to him. One hug had turned into two. Before she had known it, they were kissing again, and once they started kissing, there was no reason either of them could think of to stop. Fueled by grief and sadness and the need to feel, in that instant, very much alive, they had tumbled right back into bed.
They’d made love through the night that time. Fiercely, passionately.
By the time morning came, they had come to grips with the passing of his friend. But were more confused than ever about what had transpired between them. They knew it wouldn’t have happened had the two of them been back in Laramie, Tyler not reeling with grief. So again, they had promised themselves. No more.
And that vow had held until the day a year before, when Susie’d had a close call on the job. She was out doing a bid on a property, inspecting a tree that had died and needed to be removed, when one of the rotting limbs broke off and came down, knocking her to the ground, narrowly missing her head. Her crew had insisted she go to the hospital and get checked out. Her parents had overreacted even though all Susie had to show for the near-death experience was a few bruises and a torn shirt.
Meg and Luke had wanted her to go home with them.
She’d called Tyler and had him come and get her instead.
Tyler had told her parents he would stay with Susie through the night—a move that had turned out to be both good and bad. Good because when the enormity of what had nearly happened finally hit Susie she had started crying and couldn’t stop. Tyler had held her until the storm passed, and a different storm started. Once again, they had ended up in her bed.
Making love with him that night had been the perfect remedy for the calamity. The usual confusion and promises not to ever do it again had followed. And they had kept that promise. Until tonight.
The fact they had ended up in each other’s arms this evening really was no surprise, Susie silently reassured herself.
Her parents had a talent for driving her absolutely crazy. And now, thanks to her plea for his intervention, Tyler was being driven to distraction by the situation, too.
Fortunately, this time, for the first time, their coming together like that had started and ended with a single kiss. His emergency call had removed them from a situation rife with physical temptation and emotional pitfalls.
And now that she had gotten the much-needed break, she had to take a step back. Take a deep breath, and go back to what worked best for her, living moment to moment. No plans for the future, other than the ones she had for her business.
The upcoming holidays were going to be tough enough without adding another emotionally complicated but ultimately going-nowhere lovemaking session with Tyler to the mix. Thanksgiving was so family-centered. It always brought home to her the things that would never be hers—a husband, children, the deep, inherent belief she would have everything she had ever wanted, everything she deserved, and live to a ripe old age.
All that and more had been taken from her. She didn’t care what anyone said. No platitude or encouragement could bring it back.
“Still ticked off at me for kissing you that way?” Tyler drawled, turning his pickup into the fair grounds where the Laramie County barrel racing competition was being held.
How could she be mad at him when she was equally to blame?
Susie flashed a smile. “Not a problem as long as you don’t do it again.”
Tyler’s expression remained inscrutable. He searched for a parking place. “I’ll keep that in mind.”
Which was not the same thing as promising to abstain, Susie noted.
Jimmy Rooney and his father met them at the entrance to the horse barn. Mr. Rooney was a mild-looking man, unlike his son, who seemed like an arrogant kid.
