The New Warden

When she returned from St. Aldates, Gwendolen Scott had had only time to sit down in a chair and survey her boots for a few moments when Louise came into her bedroom and suggested that Mademoiselle would like to have her hair well brushed. Mademoiselle's hair had suffered from the passing events of the day.

"Doesn't Lady Dashwood want you?" asked Gwendolen.

No, Lady Dashwood was already dressed and was reposing herself on the couch, being fatigued. She was lying with her face towards the window, which was indeed wide open – wide open, and it was after sunset and at the end of October – par example!

Gwendolen still stared at her boots and said she wanted to think; but Louise had an object in view and was firm, and in a few minutes she had deposited the young lady in front of the toilet-table and was brushing her black curly hair with much vigour.

"Mademoiselle saw the ghost last night," began Louise.

"Who said that?" exclaimed Gwendolen.

"On dit," said Louise.

"Then they shouldn't on dit," said Gwendolen. "I never said I saw the ghost, I may have said I thought I saw one, which is quite different. The Warden says there are no ghosts, and the whole thing is rubbish."

"There comes no ghost here," said Louise, firmly, "except there is a disaster preparing for the Warden."

"The Warden's quite all right," said Gwen, with some scorn.

"Quite all right," repeated Louise. "But it may be some disaster domestic. Who can tell? There is not only death – there is – par exemple, marriage!" and Louise glanced over Gwendolen's head and looked at the girl's face reflected in the mirror.

"Well, that is cool," thought Gwendolen; "I suppose that's French!"

"The whole thing is rubbish," she said.

"One cannot tell, it is not for us to know, perhaps, but it may be that the disaster is, that Mrs. Dashwood, so charming – so douce – will not permit herself to marry again – though she is still young. Such things happen. But how the Barber should have obtained the information – the good God only knows."

Gwendolen blew the breath from her mouth with protruding lips.

"What has that to do with the Warden? I do wish you wouldn't talk so much, Louise."

"It may be a disaster that there can be no marriage between Mrs. Dashwood and Monsieur the Warden," continued Louise.

"The Warden doesn't want to marry Mrs. Dashwood," replied Gwendolen, with some energy.

"Mademoiselle knows!" said Louise, softly.

"Yes, I know," said Gwendolen. "No one has thought of such a thing – except you."

"But perhaps he is about to marry – some one whom Lady Dashwood esteems not; that would be indeed a disaster," said Louise, regretfully. "Ah, indeed a disaster," and she ran the brush lengthily down Gwendolen's hair.

"I do wish you wouldn't talk," said Gwen. "It isn't your business, Louise."

"Ah," murmured Louise, brushing away, "I will not speak of disasters; but I pray – I pray continually, and particularly I pray to St. Joseph to protect M. the Warden from any disaster whatever." Then she added: "I believe so much in St. Joseph."

"St. Joseph!" said Gwendolen, sharply. "Why on earth?"

"I believe much in him," said Louise.

"I don't like him," said Gwendolen. "He always spoils those pictures of the Holy Family, he and his beard; he is like Abraham."

"He spoils! That is not so; he is no doubt much, much older than the Blessed Virgin, but that was necessary, and he is un peu homme du monde – to protect the Lady Mother and Child. I pray to St. Joseph, because the good God, who was the Blessed Child, was always so gentle, so obedient, so tender. He will still listen to his kind protector, St. Joseph."

"Oh, Louise, you are funny," said Gwendolen, laughing.

"Funny!" exclaimed Louise. "Holy Jesus!"

"Well, it all happened such ages ago, and you talk as if it were going on now."

"It is now – always now – to God," exclaimed Louise, fervently; "there is no past – all is now."

This was far too metaphysical for Gwendolen. "You are funny," she repeated.

"Funny – again funny. Ah, but I forget, Mademoiselle is Protestant."

"No, I'm not," said Gwen; "I belong to the English branch of the Catholic Church."

"We have no branch, we are a trunk," said Louise, sadly.

"Well, I'm exactly what the Warden is and what Lady Dashwood is," said Gwendolen.

"Ah, my Lady Dashwood," said Louise, breaking into a tone of tragic melancholy. "I pray always for her. Ah! but she is good, and the good God knows it. But she is not well." And Louise changed her tone to one of mild speculation. "Madame perhaps is souffrante because of so much fresh air and the absence of shops."

"It is foolish to suppose that the Warden does just what Lady Dashwood tells him. That doesn't happen in this part of the world," said Gwendolen, her mind still rankling on Louise's remark about Lady Dashwood not esteeming – as if, indeed, Lady Dashwood was the important person, as if, indeed, it was to please Lady Dashwood that the Warden was to marry!

"Ah, no," said Louise. "The monsieurs here come and go just like guests in their homes. They do as they choose. The husband in England says never – as he does in France: 'I come back, my dearest, at the first moment possible, to assist you entertain our dear grandmamma and our dear aunt.' No, he says that not; and the English wife she never says: 'Where have you been? It is an hour that our little Suzette demands that the father should show her again her new picture book!' Ah, no. I find that the English messieurs have much liberty."

"It must be deadly for men in France," said Gwendolen.

"It is always funny or deadly with Mademoiselle," replied Louise.

But she felt that she had obtained enough information of an indirect nature to strengthen her in her suspicions that Lady Dashwood had arranged a marriage between the Warden and Mrs. Dashwood, but that the Warden had not played his part, and, notwithstanding his dignified appearance, was amusing himself with both his guests in a manner altogether reprehensible.

Ah! but it was a pity!

When Louise left the room Gwendolen went to the wardrobe, and took out the coat that Louise had put away. She felt in the wrong pocket first, which was empty, and then in the right one and found the ten-shilling note. Now that she had it in her hand it seemed to her amazing that Mrs. Potten, with her big income, should have fussed over such a small matter. It was shabby of her.

Gwendolen took her purse out of a drawer which she always locked up. Even if her purse only contained sixpence, she locked it up because she took for granted that it would be "stolen."

As she put away her purse and locked the drawer a sudden and disagreeable thought came into her mind. She would not like the Warden to know that she was going to buy an umbrella with money that Mrs. Potten had "thrown away." She would feel "queer" if she met him in the hall, when she came in from buying the umbrella. Why? Well, she would! Anyhow, she need not make up her mind yet what she would do – about the umbrella.

Meanwhile the Warden surely would speak to her this evening, or would write or something? Was she never, never going to be engaged?

She dressed and came down into the drawing-room. Dinner had already been announced, and Lady Dashwood was standing and Mrs. Dashwood was standing. Where was the Warden?

"I ought not to have to tell you to be punctual, Gwen," said Lady Dashwood. "I expect you to be in the drawing-room before dinner is announced, not after."

"So sorry," murmured Gwen; then added lightly, "but I am more punctual than Dr. Middleton!"

"The Warden is dining in Hall," said Lady Dashwood.

So the Warden had made himself invisible again! When was he going to speak to her? When was she going to be really engaged?

Gwendolen held open the door for the two ladies and, as she did so, glanced round the room. Now that she knew that the Warden was out somehow the drawing-room looked rather dreary.

Her eyes rested on the portrait over the fireplace. There was that odious man looking so knowing! She was not sure whether she shouldn't have that portrait removed when she was Mrs. Middleton. It would serve him right. She turned out the lights with some satisfaction, it left him in the dark!

As she walked downstairs behind the two ladies, she thought that they too looked rather dreary. The hall looked dreary. Even the dining-room that she always admired looked dreary, and especially dreary looked old Robinson, and very shabby he looked, as he stood at the carving table. And young Robinson's nose looked more turned-up, and more stumpy than she had noticed before. It was so dull without the Warden at the head of the table.

There was very little conversation at dinner. When the Warden was away, nobody seemed to want to talk. Lady Dashwood said she had a headache.

But Gwendolen gathered some information of importance. Mrs. Potten had turned up again, and had been told that the right money had gone to Mrs. Harding.

Gwendolen stared a good deal at her plate, and felt considerable relief when Lady Dashwood added: "She knows now that she did not lose her note in Christ Church. She is always dropping things – poor Marian! But she very likely hadn't the note at all, and only thought she had the note," and so the matter ended.

Just as dinner was over Gwen gathered more information. The Warden was going away early to-morrow! That was dreary, only – she would go and buy the umbrella while he was away, and get used to having it before he saw it.

That the future Mrs. Middleton should not even have an umbrella to call her own was monstrous! She must keep up the dignity of her future position!

CHAPTER XIX

HONOUR

The drawing-room was empty except for the figure of Gwendolen Scott. Her slim length was in a great easy-chair, on the arms of which she was resting her hands, while she turned her head from side to side like a bird that anticipates the approach of enemies.

Mrs. Dashwood and Lady Dashwood had gone upstairs, and, to her astonishment, when she prepared to follow them, Lady Dashwood had quietly made her wait behind for the Warden!

The command, for it seemed almost like a command, came with startling abruptness. So Lady Dashwood knew all about it! She must have talked it over with the Warden, and now she was arranging it as if the Warden couldn't act without her! But the annoyance that Gwen felt at this proof of Lady Dashwood's power was swallowed up in the sense of a great victory, the prize was won! She was going to be really engaged at last! All the waiting and the bother was over!

She was ready for him, at least as ready as she could be. She was glad she had got on her white frock; on the whole, she preferred it to the others. Even Louise, who never said anything nice, said that it suited her.

When would he come? And when he did come, what would he do, what would he say?

Would he come in quietly and slowly as he had done last night, looking, oh, so strong, so capable of driving ghosts away, fears away? She would never be afraid of anything in his presence, except perhaps of himself! Here he was!

He came in, shut the door behind him, and advanced towards her. She couldn't help watching him.

"You're quite alone," he said, and he came and stood by the hearth under the portrait and leaned his hand on the mantelshelf.

"Yes," said Gwen, blushing violently. "Lady Dashwood and Mrs. Dashwood have gone. Lady Dashwood said I was to stay up!"

"Thank you," said the Warden.

Gwen looked up at him wistfully.

"You wrote me a letter," he began, "and from it I gather that you have been thinking over what I said the other evening."

"Yes," said Gwen; "I've been so – bothered. Oh, that's the wrong word – I mean – "

"You have thought it over quietly and seriously?" said the Warden.

Gwen's eyes flickered. "Yes," she said; and then, as he seemed to expect her to say more, she added:

"I don't know whether you meant – " and here she stopped dead.

"Between us there must be absolute sincerity," he said.

Gwen felt a qualm. Did absolute sincerity mean that she would have to tell about the – the umbrella that she was going to get?

"Yes," she said, "I like sincerity; it's right, isn't it?"

He made no answer. She looked again at him wistfully.

"Suppose you tell me," he said gently, "what you yourself think of your mother's letter in which she speaks to you with affection and pride, and even regrets that she will lose you. Her letter conveys the idea that you are loved and wanted." He put emphasis on the "are."

"It was a nice letter," said Gwen, thinking hard as she spoke. "But you see we haven't got any home now," she went on. "Mother stays about with people. It is hard lines, but she is so sporting."

"Yes," said the Warden, "and," he said, as if to assist her to complete the picture, "yet she wants you!" As he spoke his eyes narrowed and his breath was arrested for a moment.

"Oh no," said Gwen, eagerly. "She doesn't want to prevent – me – me marrying. You see she can't have me much, it's – it's difficult in other people's houses – at least it sometimes is – just now especially."

"Thank you," said the Warden, "I understand." He sighed and moved slightly from his former position. "You mean that she wants you very much, but that she can't afford to give you a home."

"Yes," said Gwen, with relief. The way was being made very clear to her. She was telling "the truth" and he was helping her so kindly. "You see mother couldn't stand a small house and servant bothers. It's been such hard luck on her, that father left nothing like what she thought he had got. Mother has been so plucky, she really has."

"I see," said the Warden. "Then your mother's letter has your approval?"

Her approval! Yes, of course; it was simply topping of her mother to have written in the way she did.

"It was good of mother," she said. If it hadn't been for her mother she would not have known what to do.

The Warden moved his hand away from the mantelshelf and now stood with his back against it, away from the blaze of the fire.

"You have never mentioned, in my presence," he said, "what you think about the work that most girls of your age are doing for the war."

"Oh yes," said Gwen, eagerly; "mother is so keen about that. She does do such a lot herself, and she took me away from school a fortnight before time was up to go to a hospital for three months' training."

"And you are having a holiday and want to go on," suggested the Warden.

"No; mother thought I had better have a change. You can't think how horrid the matron was to me – she had favourites, worse luck; and now mother is looking – has been" – Gwen corrected herself sharply – "for something for me to do that would be more suitable, but the difficulty is to find anything really nice."

The Warden meditated. "Yes," he said.

Gwen continued to look at him, her face full of questioning.

"You have been thinking whether you should trust yourself to me," he said very gravely, "and whether you could face the responsibility and the cares of a house, a position, like that of a Warden's wife?"

"Oh yes," said Gwen.

"You think that you understand them?" he asked.

"Oh yes," said Gwen. "At least, I would try; I would do my best."

"There is nothing very amusing in my manner of life; in fact, I should describe it as – solemn. The business," he continued, "of a Warden is to ward his college. His wife's business is to assist him."

"I should simply love that," said Gwen. "I should really! I'm not clever, I know, but I would try my best, and – I'm so – afraid of you," she said with a gulp of emotion, "and admire you so awfully!"

The Warden's face hardened a little, but Gwen did not observe it; all she saw and knew was that the dismal part of the interview was over, for he accepted this outburst as a definite reply on her part to his offer. She was so glad she had said just what she had said. It seemed to be all right.

"That is your decision?" he said, only he did not move towards her. He stood there, standing with his back to the projection of the fireplace, his head on a level with the frame of the portrait. The two faces, of the present Warden of the year 1916 and the Warden of the eighteenth century, made a striking contrast. Both men had no lack of physical beauty, but the one had discovered the "rights" of man, and therefore of a Warden, and the other had discovered the "duties" of men, including Wardens.

He stood there and did not approach her. He was hesitating.

He could, if he wished it, exercise his power over her and make her answer "No." He could make her shrink away from him, or even deny that she had wished for an interview. And he could do this safely, for Gwendolen herself was ignorant of the fact that he had on the previous night exercised any influence over her except that of argument. She would have no suspicion that he was tampering with her will for his own purposes. He could extricate himself now and at this moment. Now, while she was still waiting for him to tell her whether he would marry her.

The temptation was a heavy one. It was heavy, although he knew from the first that it was one which he could and would resist. There was no real question about it.

He stood there by the hearth, a free man still. In a moment he would be bound hand and foot.

Still, come what may, he must satisfy his honour. He must satisfy his honour at any price.

Gwendolen saw that he did not move and she became suddenly alarmed. Didn't he mean to keep his promise after all? Had he taken a dislike to her?

"Have I offended you?" she asked humbly. "You're not pleased with me. Oh, Dr. Middleton, you do make me so afraid!" She got up from her chair, looking very pale. "You've been so awfully kind and good to me, but you make me frightened!" She held out her hands to him and turned her face away, as if to hide it from him. "Oh, do be kind!" she pleaded.

He was looking at her with profound attention, but the tenseness of his eyes had relaxed. Here was this girl. Foolish she might be naturally, badly brought up she certainly was, but she was utterly alone in the world. He must train her. He must oblige her to walk in the path he had laid out for her. She, too, must become a servant of the College. He willed it!

"I hope, Gwendolen," he said gently, "that I shall never be anything but kind to you. But do you realise that if you are my wife, you will have to live, not for pleasure or ease; and you will have not merely to control yourself, but learn to control other people? This may sound hard. Does it sound hard?"

Oh, she would try her very best. She would do whatever he told her to do. Just whatever he told her!

Whatever he told her to do! What an unending task he had undertaken of telling her what to do! He must never relax his will or his attention from her. It would be no marriage for him; it would be a heavy responsibility. But at least the College should not suffer! Was he sure of that? He must see that it did not suffer. If he failed, he must resign. His promise to her was not to love her. He had never spoken of love. He had offered her a home, and he must give her a home.

He braced himself up with a supreme effort and went towards her, taking her into his arms and kissing her brow and cheeks, and then, releasing himself from her clinging arms, he said —

"Go now, Gwendolen. Go to bed. I have work to do."

"Are you – is it – " she stammered.

"We are engaged, if that is what you mean," he said.

"Oh, Dr. Middleton!" she exclaimed. "And may I write to my mother?"

The Warden did not answer for a moment.

That was another burden, Gwendolen's mother! The Warden's face became hard. But he thought he knew how he should deal with Gwendolen's mother; he should begin from the very first.

"Yes," he said; "but as to her coming here – she mentions it in her letter – Lady Dashwood will decide about that. I don't know what her plans are."

Gwendolen looked disappointed. "And I may talk to Lady Dashwood, to Mrs. Dashwood, and anybody about our engagement?" she asked.

"Certainly," he said, but he spoke stiffly.

"And – and – " said the girl, following him to the door and stretching out her hand towards his arm as she walked but not touching it, – "shall I see you to-morrow morning before you go to town?"

The Warden felt as if he had been dealt a light but acutely painful blow.

Shall I see you to-morrow morning? Already she was claiming her right over him, her right to see him, to know of his movements. He had for many years been the servant of the College. He had given the College his entire allegiance, but he had also been its master. He had been the strong man among weaker men, and, as all men of his type are, he had been alone, uninterfered with, rather remote in matters concerning his private personal life. And now this mere child demanded explanations of him. It was a bitter moment for his pride and independence. However strictly he might bind his wife to his will, his own freedom had gone; he was no longer the man he had been. If this simple question, "Shall I see you to-morrow morning?" tortured his self-respect, how would he be able to bear what was coming upon him day by day? He had to bear it. That was the only answer to the question!

"I am starting early," he said. "But I shall be back on Saturday, some time in the afternoon probably."

Gwendolen's brain was in a whirl. Her desire had been consummated. The Warden was hers, but, somehow, he was not quite what he had been on that Monday evening. He was cold, at least rather cold. Still he was hers; that was fixed.

She waited for a moment to see if he meant to kiss her again. He did not mean to, he held out his hand and smiled a little.

She kissed his hand. "I shall long for you to come back," she said, and then ran out, leaving him alone to return to his desk with a heart sick and empty.

"There can be no cohesion, no progress in the world, no hope for the future of man, if men break their word; if there is no such thing as inviolable honour," the Warden said to himself, just as he had said before. "After all, as long as honour is left, one has a right to live, to struggle on, to endure."

CHAPTER XX

SHOPPING

Mrs. Potten found that it "paid" to do her own shopping, and she did it once every week, on Friday. For this purpose she was compelled to use her car. This grieved her. Her extreme desire to save petrol would have been more patriotic if she had not availed herself, on every possible occasion, of using other people's petrol, or, so to speak, other people's oats.

She had gone to the Sale of work in Boreham's gig, but there was not much room in it for miscellaneous parcels, so she was obliged to come into Oxford on the following morning as usual and do her regular shopping.

Mrs. Potten's acquaintance with the University consisted in knowing a member of it here and there, and in accepting invitations to any public function which did not involve the expenditure of her own money. No Greenleafe Potten had ever given any endowment to Oxford, nor, for the matter of that, had any Squire of Chartcote ever spent a penny for the advancement of learning. Indeed, the old County had been mostly occupied in preserving itself from gradual extinction, and the new County, the Nouveaux Riches, had been mainly occupied in the dissipation of energy.

But Mrs. Potten had given the Potten revenues a new lease of life. Not only did she make a point of not reducing her capital, but she was increasing it year by year. She did this by systematic and often minute economies (which is the true secret of economy). The surface of her nature was emotional, enclosing a core of flint, so that when she (being short-sighted) dropped things about in moments of excitement, agreeable or disagreeable, she made such losses good by drawing in the household belt. If she inadvertently dropped a half-crown piece down a grating while exchanging controversial remarks with a local tradesman, or mixed up a note with her pocket handkerchief and mislaid both when forced to find a subscription to some pious object, or if she left a purse containing one shilling and fivepence behind her on a chair in the agitation of meeting a man whom she admired (a man like the Warden, for instance); when such misfortunes happened she made them up – somehow!