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In silence they rode the elevator to the fifth floor, where they entered a large suite decorated in muted earth tones of umber and green and deep red. Sunshine poured through floor-to-ceiling glass windows and doors, giving a sunny glow to the room and sharply contrasting Jared’s icy rage.
She crossed the sitting room, putting distance between them before she turned to glare at him defiantly. “You walked out, Jared. You have no claim. Absolutely none.”
“The hell I don’t!” he snapped, shedding his coat to drop it on a chair. “That’s my son. Why didn’t you call me?”
“Call you?” she raised her voice, her cheeks flushing a deep pink, shaking with anger. She leaned forward. “Why would I call you when it was obvious that you never wanted to see me again?”
He crossed the room to clasp her shoulders. “You should’ve let me know that I was going to be a father. You damn well know it,” he said, grinding out the words, shaking himself.
“Get your hands off me!” she ordered, jerking away from him. “You asked for whatever happened.”
“Is that why you married, or did you have some kind of rebound relationship?”
She looked away and bit her lip before turning back to him. “The marriage was solely because I was pregnant.”
“You were never in love?” he asked in surprise, feeling glad even through his rage. “You didn’t marry to get even? Wasn’t that guy furious when he discovered what you’d—”
“No, he wasn’t, because our marriage was a business arrangement. My father negotiated it to cover up the paternity of my baby!” She flung the words at him.
“Negotiated?” Jared asked in disbelief. “You went along with that?”
“Damn you, Jared! You crushed me and left me and I was pregnant. My control freak father was enraged. He said horrible things. Then he contracted for the marriage and it was all settled beforehand.”
His anger toward her father returned full force. How the bastard tried to govern everything. “Your meddling father—what did he do exactly?” Jared asked, unable to stop prying, yet knowing he was going to hate what he would hear.
“He arranged or, rather, bought my marriage,” she said, pronouncing the words slowly and distinctly as if Jared were unfamiliar with English.
“Where did he find the guy?” Jared asked while his hurt multiplied.
“Mike was the son of a Montana rancher. By then, he was an engineer, living in Phoenix. My father paid him to marry me.”
“And you went along with that?”
“What was I supposed to do? It was a paper marriage, a business arrangement to give the baby a father.”
“He wasn’t our baby’s father. Did you even live under the same roof?”
“For a little over a month. The marriage was never consummated. We had separate bedrooms and each of us went our own way. Mike had no interest in me. He only wanted the money to open his own firm. But under that guise of respectability, my father would pay for the baby and my care.”
“That bastard!” Jared exclaimed, rage eating at him. He had thought when he’d left South Dakota that the Sorensons could never hurt him again. How wrong he’d been! To discover she’d hidden the most important thing in his life from him—his son—cut to his soul.
“Who are you to say that?” she answered. “You walked out and left me pregnant! Damn you, Jared! I was uneducated, young and dependent on my dad.”
It was on the tip of his tongue to reveal her father’s duplicity, but he wasn’t going to get into that now, or hurling accusations would be all they would do. He wanted to know about Ethan.
“So go on—tell me what you did. You married Mike and moved to Arizona.”
“That’s right. Under the circumstances, I was less than pleasant. Mike was interested in his career and I think there was someone in his life, but he was kind enough to keep her out of our lives. We got a quiet divorce after seven weeks and I left.”
“You came home once for a reception, I heard.”
“Yes, so Dad could convince people that Ethan was Mike’s son.”
“How could anybody believe that lie after Ethan was born?”
She shrugged. “I don’t know what gossip flew, nor did I care by then.”
“I got a degree of revenge on your father in Ethan, since he looks exactly like me. Your father had to be constantly reminded of me,” Jared said. No one who knew both him and Ethan could mistake the connection. “Do you ever see Mike?”
“No. We went our separate ways and I haven’t talked to him since,” she said, and Jared was surprised by the relief he experienced over her answer. “My dad used to tell me about him occasionally. I think he’d even hoped we’d stay married. Mike established his own firm and married. That’s the last I heard about him.”
“Damn it,” Jared said. All they had both gone through because of her father. “And in all that time, it didn’t occur to you to let the father of your baby know about his son’s existence?”
“Don’t, Jared! Don’t accuse me—”
He grasped her shoulders again, fighting the urge to shake her. “I’m the father, and in this day and age I have rights. Yes, I accuse you. You know damned well you should’ve let me know we were having a baby.”
“I never once when I was pregnant thought I should let you know,” she said, the words tumbling out in a rage.
“When I first spoke to you last Saturday, you went white as a sheet and looked as if you might faint.” His voice was low, and he leaned closer with anger white hot. “You were filled with guilt for keeping silent. Admit it, Megan! Admit that you know you should’ve told me about Ethan.”
Her eyes were wide and green with anger as she shook her head, adding to his fury. “No. You gave that right up when you walked out without a word. You cut all ties with me in the cruelest possible way.”
When he flinched because what she accused him of was true, he still couldn’t bring himself to reveal to her that it was her father, because it would sound weak, as if he were making excuses. “Maybe I deserved for you to keep me out of your life, but when Ethan was born, you know you should have informed me. If you’d told me you were expecting a baby, I would’ve come back here.”
“Oh, please, Jared! Don’t stretch credulity to that point! You know you wouldn’t have. You would have run all the more, if I’d called you and said you were about to become a father. Or you would’ve asked if I was sure it was your child.”
“That’s not true,” he said in a voice that was low and vehement. “I damn well would’ve come back.”
“You’ll never, ever convince me of that. It’s a moot point now,” she said, glaring at him and he noticed she was breathing as rapidly as he was.
“Even so, I can’t believe that in all these years you haven’t told me. I can’t understand why my own parents didn’t tell me, but they moved from here two years later.”
“I didn’t see your parents. I didn’t come home to live for a year and a half. People here met Mike at the reception, so they accepted the story that he was the father. Your parents moved shortly after I returned.”
“I still say you should have told me. You know you should have. When you moved back here, you could have faced dealing with letting me know. We’d put enough time between us—”
“Enough time between us that I no longer hurt from what you did?” she flung the words at him as he clamped his jaw closed while he clenched his fists.
“Even so—”
“All right,” she said, her voice suddenly sounding restrained. “When Ethan was one, I should’ve informed you. But I always thought I would when he got a little older, or if you came home and we crossed paths. Or if you tried to contact me, which of course, you didn’t until you wanted something I have. Whenever a year rolled by, I put off telling you again.” His anger was mirrored in the depths of her eyes. “What was I to do? Pick up the phone and call the man who walked out on me and say, ‘Oh, by the way, we had a baby’? You left without a word—that means you wanted to sever all ties with me. Why on earth would I call you?” she cried. “Can’t you get it?”
“I deserved to know, Megan, simply because I’m his father,” Jared said. “I guess you don’t know a parent’s rights, but I do have rights. Where was Ethan born?”
“In Chicago, where we had gone to college. It’s a large city and far from here.”
Jared’s pain over the past intensified. “You were alone in Chicago? Did you have any friends?”
“I’m sure you care!” she exclaimed bitterly. “Jared, this is all past.”
“I want to know what happened. Answer my damn questions.”
“If you must know, my aunt came to stay with me the last two weeks. My dad never came. After Ethan was six months old, he told me to come back home.”
“Well, I got some damned revenge there. Ethan looks like me. What a blow that must have been.”
“It was to all of us. I prayed he wouldn’t look like you—and that you’d never know,” she said, the coldness and anger clear in her voice.
“Damn it, Megan!”
“Damn it is right! I prayed my baby wouldn’t resemble you in any way and that you’d never know as long as you lived. How can you act like you care now?”
“It’s a shock to discover I have a child. I have questions. And frankly, Megan, I want to know my son.”
She looked as if he’d hit her. And then he could see her pull herself together in that manner she had. She stood taller, a coolness coming to her features.
“Was it difficult for you when you came back home? With one look at Ethan, I’d think anyone would’ve known who his father was.”
“How much gossip there was, I don’t know,” she admitted. “In the course of months, other scandalous things happened around this area, so interest shifted. It didn’t matter after we moved to Santa Fe and it never has again, I’m sure you and I were a major source of gossip until I married Mike. You couldn’t tell who Ethan’s dad was by looking, until after the boy got a full head of hair. While he was a baby, people thought that he was Mike’s child. Dad was smart enough to find a guy who bore a physical resemblance to you—black hair, dark brown eyes, tall. It was inevitable that Ethan would have black hair. No one would give that a thought.”
“I’ll bet my folks never laid eyes on him. One look at him, hair or no hair, and my mom would’ve known.”
“As a matter of fact, they didn’t.”
“Damn it, even if I did walk without telling you good-bye, you should’ve let me know about our baby. I know now, though,” he said coldly. “We’re going to have to work something out,” he said.
She walked away to stand by the floor-to-ceiling glass door before she turned back to face him. “You keep your distance. You forfeited all rights to Ethan when you walked out on me. You’re not coming into our lives now, Jared. Forget that one. I don’t see that you have any rights in the matter.”
“I damn well do. You’re not going to pack and go and take him away from me.”
“I’m going home. You know what happened after you left me, and this is getting us nowhere.”
“How the hell can you walk out of here and try and say good-bye? Understand me, Megan, I intend to get to know my son,” he declared, his temper rising. He clenched his fists and inhaled deeply.
He stood with his hands on his hips and they glared at each other, the clash fierce between them. In spite of all his fury, he wanted her. She was as beautiful and enticing as she was infuriating. Long strands of her black hair had come loose from the clip and fell around her face. Her cheeks were flushed and her eyes wide, and she was enticing in spite of the struggle between them. He desired her and he wished she would cooperate with him—both impossibilities.
“All right, we’ll go back to the ranch and discuss it,” he said. “You come to my place or I’ll go to yours. The sun is shining, no rain is predicted and the river has lowered enough that the bridge is definitely above water.”
“I see no point in arguing further,” she said.
“Megan, I will get to know Ethan. That’s a fact, not a wish,” he stated, trying to control his temper, pushed to his limit. “We can discuss what we’re going to do in the future. Your ranch or mine will be more comfortable for both of us and this may take a while.”
She clamped her lips closed for a moment. “I know you’ve had a shock. The drive to the ranch will give you some time to adjust to your new status and to think about all that’s happened. Don’t tear up Ethan’s life. You think about it when you drive home. You’re being selfish again. I know you’re accustomed to thinking only of yourself, but you’ll hurt him if you come into his life. And you’ll raise a hundred questions.”
“You should have thought of those questions,” Jared said. “You should have known that this day would come.”
“It wouldn’t have happened if you hadn’t wanted to buy the ranch,” she said bitterly.
“You might have slipped by if you’d sold it to me. My attorneys would have handled the deal, and I doubt if you and I would have crossed paths except at the closing, and then you would have left for New Mexico and I would’ve gone on my way. Big error, Megan, if you’d really hoped to keep me from Ethan.”
Her face flushed and he knew he’d been correct in all he’d stated.
“Perhaps, but I couldn’t bear the thought of selling to you. You get what you want in life too easily.”
“Well, now you pay the price for that refusal.”
Frowning, she picked up her purse and hurried to the door. “If you insist, I’ll see you at my ranch. I’m not taking any chance of getting marooned at yours again.”
Grabbing his coat, he caught up to hold the door and walk out with her. “We’ll start another flurry of rumors by this little interlude in the hotel.”
“I can’t worry about that. I don’t plan to live here,” she said. “I don’t have many close friends here any longer. The few that I have are close enough to understand and to know that there will never be anything between you and me again.”
“You can’t foretell the future,” he said.
“I can predict that much with certainty. There’s too much bitterness on either side for it to vanish.”
He didn’t answer, his mind reeling with his discovery and what he’d learned from her. He escorted her to the street where she motioned with her hand. “My car is parked right there. I’ll see you at home.”
“All right. This will give you time to think, too.”
She nodded and walked quickly away. His gaze traveled over her, looking at the sway of her hips and her leggy stride while he thought about their future. He hurried to his car and in minutes he was out of town.
As he drove to the ranch, he pored over their conversation. His mind kept going back to that startling moment when Ethan looked up at him. Jared vowed that he wasn’t going to be out of Ethan’s life. Megan wasn’t thinking straight, and he knew he had rights. He’d heard too much about a birth father’s rights. He’d never let her cut him out of Ethan’s life now.
Damn her bastard father. Now Jared could understand her bitterness and anger. Why hadn’t she called and let him know? No undoing the past now—but he wasn’t leaving here without settling up when and how he could have Ethan with him and be talking to Ethan as his father.
Now he could understand her frightened and unhappy aunt and uncle’s reactions. Only Ethan was oblivious to the emotional tempest swirling around him.
Realizing how fast he was driving, Jared eased his foot and set cruise control while his mind was still on Ethan. All the years of Ethan’s life he had missed, babyhood, toddler—it hurt, and he vowed that this distance was going to end as soon as possible.
He tried to think of ways they could share Ethan’s life. They needed solutions, not accusations and anger. How could they work it out to share their child, when they had such disparate lives, and while she was so furious with him?
In front of Megan’s ranch house, he spotted her car outside her garage. As he crossed the porch, she opened the door. “Come in, Jared,” she said.
He entered a wide hallway that he hadn’t seen for the past seven years, recalling the last time he’d walked along the hall and out the front door. He’d been hurt, his life had changed and he wouldn’t see Megan again—until this year. All because of her father.
He followed her into a spacious living area that was just as he remembered, with a huge stone fireplace, animal head trophies on the walls, a large gilt-framed portrait of her father, Edlund, on one wall and a smaller picture of Megan beside it. Leather-covered furniture filled the room, along with a wide-screen television and ceiling fans that slowly turned overhead. The polished wood floor held Navajo rugs. Window shutters were open. Memories crowded him—some not good.
She turned to face him. “Let’s get this over with. I hope you’ve done some thinking and that you’ve calmed. Jared, your life is too busy to give much attention to a child.”
“Your life isn’t busy?” he asked with cynicism.
“Of course it is. But I don’t travel the world or have much social life or have any lifestyle like you do, and my kiln and studio are at home, and my gallery is attached to the house, so I can be with him when he’s home.”
“I’m glad to hear that.”
“Oh, please!” she replied. “You have an interest in him because of the novelty of discovering you’re related to him.”
