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A nod was all he managed. She took everything to the sink. The lights flickered as the thunder rolled through the house. She tilted her head toward the ceiling. “Doesn’t sound like it’s letting up.” The lights wavered again. “Follow me—I’ll show you the baby stuff I have ready for you and Pilar.” She walked through an archway that took them into a living room. Several mix-and-match sofas and chairs made for a welcoming room. He was surprised by the white sofa. The red floral sofa he expected, but the white one? How did she keep it clean? He didn’t know anyone who actually dared to have white furniture. Red, white and blue pillows and blankets were everywhere. Yellow flowers were tucked into odd containers all over the room. It looked well lived-in, the site of years of family events and memories.
“I’ve been wanting to tell you how much I appreciate you playing the sax on the balcony. When I’m working in the studio, I open my door to listen. You should come to church with me one Sunday. Pastor John is really into music. Did you ever play in a band?”
He nodded and followed her around the furniture that looked as if they’d been salvaged from an old barn. “All through school, and when I joined the Marines, I played for them, too.”
“Wow.” She stopped in front of a floor-to-ceiling bookcase and looked up at him, making him feel taller than his six-one. “I would have taken you for a football player, you know, the warrior type. I don’t think of soldiers as musicians. Do you play any other instruments?” She tilted her head as if trying to recalibrate what she knew about him.
“I was a total band geek, marching and jazz. I play some strings, too, but I prefer the sax. I didn’t get any size on me until later in high school—I wasn’t a jock.” He cleared his throat. She looked as if she wanted to add him to her collection of odd animals now.
He glanced at the shelf behind her, and a wooden display with a folded flag caught his eye. The flag sat above some medals and a picture of a young Hispanic male in dress blues. Next to that was a wedding picture. A very young Anjelica in a white wedding dress standing in the arms of the same soldier. Letters were etched into the wood: Estevan Diego Garza.
She turned and looked behind her. “Oh, that’s my husband, Steve.”
“He was a marine, too.” Way to go and state the obvious, Garrett.
“Yes, one of the heroes that didn’t come home.” Graceful fingers touched the picture. “Being a hero was his life’s dream. He planned to become a firefighter or EMT when he got home.” A bright flash flooded the room in blinding light. Then everything went dark and silent.
He reached out to touch her arm, but the lights were on again and she had her happy face back in place. “I’m sorry. I’m going on and on. You’re here to see the baby stuff.” A few steps and she opened a white painted door.
Nerves started crawling again. Garrett’s skin became too tight for his body. The urge to escape and go back to his simple rooms had him feeling edgy. There was nothing wrong with beige. Beige was calming, very calming. A peaceful color for kids who needed a quiet place to heal. He liked quiet places.
Concern in her eyes, Anjelica placed a gentle touch on his arm. “Are you okay?”
She was the one who’d lost her soldier and a baby, but she was worried about him?
“I’m good. We need to get this settled so I can figure out the next steps I need to take to make this right.”
“Garrett, it’s not your fault the way things played out.”
A corner of his mouth twitched. She actually had him smiling. “I don’t think that’s what you were thinking earlier.”
“Guilty. Sometimes we dive headfirst into conclusions and judge too fast. Sorry. So are you ready to see the stuff?”
“Lead the way.”
* * *
Anjelica stood at her daughter’s door. She had put so much planning and time into decorating this space. Each step had been documented and sent to Steve, along with images of her growing belly.
Five years ago, she spent hours in that rocking chair, crying until every part of her body ached. After a while, she was able to visit the room without crying. The sadness was still there, but softer. The last few months, she kept telling herself to call her mom and sisters so they could help her pack it up.
Now she knew God had another plan for this room. “Garrett, most of what Pilar will need is here.” She turned on the overhead light and waited for him to join her.
In the middle of the room, she stopped and took a deep breath before she turned back to him. “This would have been Esperanza’s room. Nothing has ever been used.”
Garrett stood in the doorway and scanned the room with a slow steady movement. “I can’t take your stuff from here.”
“Why not? I was to the point of packing it up. It was made for a little girl. Everything your daughter needs is waiting for her.”
His head jerked up. “She’s not my daughter.” Both hands dug into his hair, interlocking the fingers at his neck. With his head back, he closed his eyes and blew out a slow waft of air. “I guess by tomorrow she’ll be my daughter.” He closed his eyes, his jaw working twice as fast as before.
She wanted to put her arms around him and soothe the pain. Instead she stepped away and placed her hand on the quilt draped over the rocking chair. Buela had made the blanket. “Garrett, you can do this. I think God brings people into our world that need us and vice versa. It’s been heavy on my heart that all the stuff was being wasted.” She walked to the white crib that was tucked into a colorfully painted cove that had once been a closet. Pink and green triangle flags hung over the bed. “Please let me give it to Pilar and your son.”
Confusion marred his strong face as he watched her. “Why are you doing this? What do you get out of helping us?”
Adjusting the blankets they had picked out so long ago, she smiled at his cynicism. “I can’t save every child out there, but I can help you save these two.” If she wasn’t careful, she was going to cry. She feared he would misunderstand and this could all fall apart. She stiffened her spine as she turned and glared at him, making sure not to show any weakness. “Stop being so suspicious and say thank you.”
He walked around the room. Touching the rocking chair, setting it in motion. He saw the bags full of new supplies and clothes. “What’s this?”
“While you were sleeping, I called a few of my family members and ladies from the church. They gathered some stuff you’ll need for the children.”
In front of the chest of drawers, he stopped and looked at the wall.
She had painted Esperanza across the upper part of the wall, surrounded by stars and butterflies. The whole room was decorated with flowers and friendly critters, a little secret garden.
With a frown, he stared at the wall. “You painted this?”
A nod was all she managed.
He moved to the window and held the wispy sheer curtain to the side so he could look out into the storm. Wind slammed the rain against the window.
“I called my mother.”
Disappointment should not have been her first reaction, but it was. She had started thinking of them as a team when it came to these two kids she hadn’t even met yet. “Oh, so she’s coming to help? You don’t need me, then.”
He rubbed his face. “No.” He looked away, staring at the mural. “She hasn’t returned my calls. It looks like I’ll need someone to watch the kids. A temporary fix for now. Until I can get a place of my own and make permanent arrangements.” He turned back to her. “Is there anyone in your family you recommend?”
“Me.” Before he could form any words to argue against her idea, she rushed on to explain. “I’ve been thinking about this all day. I’m a sub at the school and I volunteer with the group home. I know what these babies have been through, so you wouldn’t have to explain that to someone new. I can stop taking sub jobs and you can pay me the same daily fee, but I would be available day or night.”
He looked back out the window. Lightning flashed. She forced herself to breathe and waited for him to process the options.
Well, she tried to wait. “I also had another idea. Please, listen and think about it before you respond. I think you and the kids should move into the house. It’s bigger and I can live in the apartment.”
She chewed on the inside of her cheek while waiting for his response.
“No.” He crossed his arms. “I’m not kicking you out of your family home.”
“You’re not.” Hands planted on her hips, she tilted her head. “The garage is part of my family home and I actually lived there as a teenager once.”
“No. We’ll stay in the apartment. It’s fine. I’m not moving into your house.”
“Okay. Then what about hiring me as your babysitter?” She smiled. “I do think it’s important to have someone that can watch them with your crazy hours. I can be right there at a moment’s notice. The next best thing to a live-in nanny. I always wanted to be Mary Poppins.”
He didn’t say anything. He stared at her with the muscles flexing in his arms.
She broke eye contact first and rearranged some of the pillows. “You don’t have to worry about taking the kids anywhere or waiting for someone to get here. It’s perfect, right?”
“I don’t like asking for help.”
A giant eye-roll threatened to pop from her head. Stubborn men. “You didn’t have to ask for help. I’m offering. My heart is hurting for these babies. I’m so sorry your mother isn’t coming, but I think this will work out well for the children.”
He sighed. “It’s funny if you think about it.” He leaned across the crib, picking up a stuffed ladybug. “This morning I didn’t even have a girlfriend. Now I’m talking about baby furniture and hiring a nanny. Seems I skipped a few steps from bachelorhood to fatherhood.”
The sadness in his eyes ate at her heart. “God has placed these kids with you. It’s going to be okay.”
He sighed. “Are you sure you want to take us on full-time? I have a feeling these will not be well-adjusted kids.” He gave her a lazy, lopsided grin. “I know I’m not well-adjusted—I’m barely housebroken. I don’t even know what a normal family should look like.”
“Well, the one thing I’m an expert on is family, and first let me tell you, there is no such thing as normal. Believe me, I know.” She could not hold back any longer; she walked over and hugged him. His frame tightened as if in fight-or-flight mode. She held him gently until he relaxed and gave her a stiff pat on her shoulder. “Garrett, I want to help those sweet kids.”
The muscles in his forearms bulged. Head down, he backed away from her. “They might not be so sweet.” Then he nodded, his face relaxing. “Okay, so I have a stocked nursery and a nanny. This might work.” He looked up. “Thank you, Anjelica.” Halfway to the door, he stopped. “What about the boy? I need to get him a bed, too.”
“I can call around, but if nothing comes up, we have a couple of bunk beds upstairs.” She brushed past him to cross the living room but paused in the doorway. The smell of earth after a rainstorm crossed her senses. Closing her eyes, she absorbed the scent. It was rich and dark.
“Anjelica?”
Jerked out of her own head, she jumped forward and bumped into him. Large hands steadied her. “Are you okay?”
Looking up, she saw the concern in his eyes. He looked that way a great deal when around her. He probably thought she was a complete flake and maybe he was right.
“I’m fine. We can move all the stuff in the morning.” She rushed past him. She needed some distance. That was it. Other than her family, and the one date she’d had with Jake Torres, she hadn’t been this close to a man in a long time. She’d forgotten how good they smelled, and how different they were compared to her.
“Can I use your restroom?” he asked.
“Sure—right through that door.” She pointed to the right of the staircase.
Standing in the middle of the living room, she lost her purpose. What was she doing?
Anjelica went back into the kitchen. Bumper barked, demanding attention. The little Yorkie looked like a rat just rescued from a flooded river. Anjelica grabbed a towel and rubbed down the little dog. Garrett and Steve seemed to have a great deal in common. Why did some men want to rush into danger?
Buela and Mom were always on her about getting back into the dating scene. She knew it was time. But not with Garrett. He had too much on his plate already.
The biggest problem was his job. He was a lawman and she didn’t see that changing anytime soon.
Talking to the dog, she made her way to the studio off her kitchen. “Just because I married one soldier doesn’t mean I want another one in my life. No thank you.” She held Bumper up so they were face-to-face. “Next time around, I want a man with a nice safe job. Maybe I should warn Garrett about the matchmaking duo. Now that he’s a single father, I’m sure they have bumped him up on their list.” She chuckled. This might be fun to watch, because it was not going to be her. Nope, his job was too dangerous for her peace of mind. But she was ready to date again.
In a few months, she’d be twenty-five. On her wedding day, she had imagined life with Steve in five and ten years. He’d be back home full-time, and they’d have two or three kids. She rubbed the little dog’s head and sighed.
Si Dios quiere. Her parents had taught her that saying for her whole life, to trust in God’s will. Sometimes it was easier to say she trusted in God’s will than live like it. The wind rushed against the wall and slammed the screen door. Hail hit the roof harder and the storm whirled around the old house.
Loud banging made her jump. The wind played games with her outdoor furniture. She rushed to the door.
Garrett gently caught her by the arm. His hard face looked even sterner. “You can’t go out there.” His voice sounded like a growl. “It’s even more dangerous than before. It’s late anyway—you should go to bed.”
She narrowed her eyes and pulled her arm out of his light grip. With her hands on her hips, she lifted her chin. “I outgrew a bedtime a few years back. What about you?”
The wind manhandled the hundred-year-old oak trees around her yard. The sound sent chills up her spine. She sucked in a large volume of air as she looked out the window. The force of the storm pelted the hail into the passageway. The rain came in at such a slant, looking as if it could slice through skin.
With muttered words under his breath, Garrett pushed her farther into the kitchen. “Is there a room without so many windows?”
“My studio.” Bumper barked and jumped around her feet. “There’s just the garden doors, but I have shutters over them. It’s in there.” She pointed to the door on the other side of her table. “But my animals. What—”
“They have shelter.” He opened the door, flipped on the light and peered in. “This is good.” He took her hand and pulled her inside the studio space and closed the door.
Sitting on the wooden bench her grandfather had carved, she patted the empty spot next to her. His big frame took up the rest of the space, long legs stretched out in front of him.
Total chaos reigned outside. She often thought of the wind as a gentle lullaby at night, but not now. It expressed itself like a two-year-old in a full-blown temper tantrum, a giant two-year-old. It sounded as if trees were being tossed around.
Bumper buried her head under Anjelica’s arm. Her heart slammed against her sternum. “Dear God, please keep everyone safe.” Thunder rolled, but in the studio they couldn’t see the flashes of lightning. The walls rattled. The lights went out, plunging them into darkness. “Oh no, I left candles in the kitchen.”
“We’ll be fine. It shouldn’t last long. We’re safer in here in case any furniture or branches get tossed into one of your windows.”
Another clap of thunder was followed by a loud crash. This time the whole earth shook. An explosion sounded too close. Had something hit the house? Blood rushed to her ears. “What was that? Oh, my babies have to be scared.”
His long fingers found her hand and took hold. “It’s okay. Good thing about Texas is the storms never last long. So this is your grandparents’ house?” His voice reached out to her, low and soothing.
She knew he was distracting her and she let him. “My great-grandparents had the property and a small house. My grandparents started this house and added on and updated as the family grew. They wanted to move into town and have a smaller place, so they sold it to Steve and me.”
As quickly as the wind had started, it was gone, the silence heavy. Anjelica held her breath and waited, but she couldn’t even hear the rain anymore. “Is the storm over?”
He squeezed her hand. “Stay here while I check the damage.” He stood. He flipped the switch, but the room stayed dark.
“I’m going with you.”
He frowned and opened his mouth, then shook his head. “Stay close to me. There could be lines down. We don’t want to rush out and make things worse. Trees and structures could still fall.”
Bumper squirmed in her arms. “Let me put her in the washroom and get the flashlights.”
As they exited the back door, she gasped. Her world had been turned upside down. She prayed she’d find everyone safe and sound.
Garrett’s warmth and solidness comforted her. Looking around, she found most of the rocking chairs and some of her wind chimes were missing. Broken pieces of ceramic projects littered the ground. Frantically scanning for the piece celebrating her wedding and then pregnancy, she didn’t find it. It was her favorite, whimsical shapes and swirls with sunflowers, frogs and butterflies in an asymmetrical layout.
She gasped. Large pieces of it were scattered across the porch. She found one of the frogs on the bottom step. She picked it up and ran her thumb along the jagged edge where the leg had been.
Garrett rushed to her side. “What is it? Are you okay?”
She nodded. “Sorry. It’s one of my wind chimes. I started this one when we bought the house. Each section was tied to a memory.” She made sure to smile at him. “It’s just an object, right? The memories are in my heart. Let’s make sure everyone’s all right. That’s the important thing. Not broken pieces of clay.”
“Are you sure?” He looked back at the porch. “Was it the one with the big sunflower and bugs?”
She had to laugh. “Yes, butterflies, ladybugs and frogs. Steve loved frogs. He always had a pet one growing up. He wanted to put a pond for frogs on the property. I didn’t want the cleanup or risk to children. I was going to decorate the nursery with frogs if we had a boy.” She closed her eyes and gathered her thoughts. “I’m sorry—this doesn’t matter.”
“Do you want to gather it up?”
“No, it... We need to take care of my poor babies.”
The beams of their flashlights scanned the area. Debris, both natural and man-made, cluttered the yard. As they walked past the empty garden, she let out her breath with a sigh of relief. Her pens and outbuildings all stood strong. He followed her to each shed and helped her check the huddled groups of animals. Everyone was safe and accounted for. Her father would be proud of his work.
Garrett’s phone went off. Glancing down, he pulled his lips tight. “I need to go. We have low water crossings that need to be barricaded.” He glanced at her little farm. “Everyone is safe for now. You stay inside until we can get someone out here to look deeper at the damage.”
