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Breathe, Garrett. You have to breathe. He nodded. His throat too dry to make a coherent sound.
“Her son’s name is Garrett River Kincaid Jr. You’re listed as the father on his birth certificate. Family members also say you’re the father.”
“Are you sure?” What kind of man didn’t know he had a kid? Even his loser of a father stuck around for the first few years. “I didn’t know.” His jaw hurt, but he made sure to keep his face calm. A clear mind and facts, that was what he needed to sort this out.
“This is an emergency situation. You can challenge with a DNA test if you want to, but the state uses the name on the birth certificate and acknowledges you as the legal father.”
Garrett looked at the curve of the rocker resting on the worn boards of the porch. What had Viviana done now? He cleared his throat, the need to explain, to make them understand, burning his gut.
He heard the creak of the screen door again and looked up. Anjelica handed him a water bottle. Fighting the urge to press the cold bottle against his neck, he rolled it between his palms. His landlady vanished inside the house again. “Why are you the one telling me this? Are they in trouble?” If CPS was involved, something had to be wrong.
Sheriff Torres leaned his elbows on his knees and Sharon took a deep breath. He wanted to yell at them to stop messing with him, but he sat and waited. He pressed his right thumb into the center of his left palm. He could hear the chickens in the yard and music playing somewhere in the house. None of it seemed real.
“There’s a history of domestic violence with her current boyfriend.”
Viviana’s life was a history of domestic violence, from the time she was born. The need to save her had eaten him for years.
“Yesterday a neighbor called to report shouting and gunshots. Two bodies were found. It looks as if he shot her, then turned the gun on himself. It’s under investigation. The officers found the boy, Garrett, his baby sister and a dog hiding in the backyard.”
All the blood left his body. If Sharon kept talking, he didn’t hear it. Viviana was dead. Grief and regret swamped him. She was dead and she had left children behind. Not just the one boy named Garrett Kincaid, but a daughter, too. Oh, Viviana.
He ran his hands through his hair. “More than one?” He didn’t understand. “How many children did she have? Are they Ed’s?” This couldn’t be real. “I can’t imagine he allowed her to put my name as the father. This isn’t making sense.”
The caseworker’s brow drew closer and she gave him a questioning look. “Ed? I don’t know who that is. The current boyfriend was James Barrow. He is the father of the little girl. She’s ten months old. He was an auto mechanic and had a job in Kerrville until about a month ago. His family lives in Houston.”
He rubbed his face. “She moved on to someone worse?” Trying to figure out Viviana’s love life wasn’t important right now. Her children were now orphaned. What a mess, a living nightmare.
He took in one long breath, counting to seven. “Tell me what you know.” He looked Sharon in the face. If what she said was correct, the boy wasn’t an orphan. Garrett’s stomach rolled.
No, the boy had a father, and that would be him. Maybe. Just because Viviana put his name on the birth certificate didn’t mean the boy was his, but he couldn’t just leave them, either. From the first time he met her at the age of ten, he had been desperate to rescue Viviana from her life. Taking her children would be a way to do that, since she never allowed him to help her.
“The boy, Garrett River, just turned five. Pilar is the girl—she’s ten months old. With the birth certificate, letters from the mother and other family members’ statements, we have enough evidence to immediately place them with you if you’re willing. It doesn’t mean you’re taking permanent custody of the girl. There will be a hearing for temporary placement that needs to happen rather fast. The courts will decide on that first, then permanent in six months.”
Custody and court dates? Garrett leaned back and closed his eyes. “I gave her an ultimatum. Viviana picked Ed. I left Houston, blocked her from my phone and filed for divorce.” He jolted from the rocking chair and paced along the edge of the porch. His muscles jumped under his skin, restless and tight.
Oh man, what if she’d tried to call and tell him about the pregnancy? He covered his eyes with his hands, pressing the palms hard against his eye sockets. He had been so set on not allowing her to use him again. His stubbornness could mean he had left a son behind. “What do I need to do now?”
“We need you to take immediate custody of the children.” She took a sip of her coffee. “Because you’re a state trooper, a veteran and the state-acknowledged biological father of the first child, we could place Pilar with you if you’re willing to take her. We would still have to go to court, but my hope is you agree to be the temporary solution. We still need to follow up with home inspections and parenting classes.”
Looking at the horizon, Garrett cleared all thoughts and concentrated on breathing.
Torres cleared his throat. “So he doesn’t need a DNA test to claim the boy? Where are they now?”
“No, as far as we’re concerned, he’s the father. He’ll only need the DNA test if he wants to challenge the birth certificate. Right now the kids are in an emergency shelter in Kerrville. We’d like to get them out of there as soon as possible. It’s not designed for the care of infants and small children. There’s no one that’s capable of caring for the children on the mother’s side of the family, and the father’s side refuses to take them.”
“So you want me to take both of them.”
“We do prefer keeping them together whenever possible.”
He nodded. A baby needed a crib and a car seat... Well, he wasn’t even sure what all a baby needed. The boy was only five. Did he need special equipment? “What timeline are you looking at for me to take the kids?”
“So you’re willing to take both of the children?”
He nodded. He didn’t see any other choice. If that was his son and his son had a sister, he’d keep them together. Even if the boy wasn’t his son, he was Viviana’s and no kid deserved to start off life that way.
Everyone was looking at him. Glancing away from their intense gazes, Garrett turned to the horizon. This was not how he imagined fatherhood entering his life. A strong urge to pray plagued him, but he didn’t even know where to start.
Sharon gave him a big smile. “Good. I know this is a shock, but the faster we can get these little ones settled with you, the better. Can you pick them up tomorrow? We’ll set up a house inspection afterward.”
“Tomorrow.” A flash of panic constricted his lungs. Garrett turned to Torres. He was the closest thing to a friend he had in this town, but their only connections were the Marines and state law enforcement. Could he help with the kids?
No, not the kids, his kids. Hoping the sick feeling in his gut didn’t show on his face, he forced a smile for Sharon.
With a warm glow in her eyes, she leaned forward and touched his hand, offering him two plain-looking folders. These folders would change his life forever. Was he ready? Could he do this? Parenting two babies who’d suffered a major trauma. He had his own issues to deal with. Nodding, he took the folders from her. “Thank you.” His fingers dropped them on the tabletop as if they had burned him.
He had been so careless and Viviana...oh, Viviana. He thought of the girl he had loved. His love had not been enough. Would he be enough for her children? The children were caught in a horrific trap and it looked as if he was their best hope. That didn’t say much for the poor kids. He had to be stronger than his nightmares. Another wave of nausea rolled over his stomach.
This had to be made right. They needed a safe place, a home. He was all they had left. Maybe his mother could take some time off work.
Anjelica opened the door. “Do you need anything? More water? Something to eat?”
“I didn’t even think to ask. I got custody of two small children, a small boy and a baby girl. Can I move them into the apartment with me?”
“Two? Not just the son?” Her mouth open, she blinked a few times before turning to the CPS worker. “Without a doubt, they’ll be welcomed here. Anything they need.”
Sheriff Torres nodded and turned to Garrett. “I’ll talk to Pastor John. The church will make sure you have what you need. Don’t hesitate to ask for help on this. Check to see if you can take some days off work to get them settled.” He looked at Sharon. “He’ll have the support of the community. We’ll make sure he has all the bases covered.”
Garrett rubbed the back of his neck. All the bases would mean childcare with his crazy schedule and appropriate gear for the kids. Food that kids ate. Did a ten-month-old baby even eat? Was she still on a bottle? Oh man, they need psychotherapy. He jerked his head to the caseworker, who now stood next to him. “Did they witness the incident?”
Pursing her lips, she gave him a slight nod. “We believe the boy did. Everything’s in the report. Like I said, they found them in the backyard. At first the dog made it difficult to get to them. We’re not sure if they crawled out before or after the incident.”
And there it just went. Had he really thought things couldn’t get worse?
Anjelica moved closer to the edge of the porch. “Sharon, you don’t need to worry.” Tenderness softened her eyes to a golden honey as she looked at Sheriff Torres. “These kids won’t be alone. We can all lend a hand.”
Without even knowing what had happened, she stepped up and offered her service. He hated the thought of her reaction to the fact he had a son he didn’t know existed.
Asking for help went against everything he’d ever taught himself. But if he and these poor kids were going to have a chance at surviving this ordeal, that was going to have to change.
A dry throat was hard to talk around. He swallowed and managed a simple “Thank you.”
Sharon smiled. “I have given you some shocking information, Officer Kincaid. In the folders you’ll find my number if you need to reach me. You’ll be appointed a new caseworker.” She smiled at Anjelica. “Thanks for helping.”
“It’s the least I can do.” She looked at Garrett, her wide smile tighter than usual. The new coldness burned in her usually warm eyes.
Gathering her bag, Sharon turned away from them. She stopped at the last step. “You’ll make a big difference in their lives. You’re doing the right thing, Officer Kincaid.”
Then why did it feel like he was making the worst mistake in his life? He turned to Anjelica. “I have to go to the apartment and see what I can do to make it kid ready.”
Nodding, she followed him off the porch. “You’re going to need stuff for a baby. Crib, changing table, bottles, car seat, probably clothes and shoes for both of them.”
The lifeline that tethered him to Earth disappeared. It was as if he was floating away from everything he knew and had no way to get back. How was he going to make this work? Halfway up the steps, he realized Anjelica was still following him. He raised an eyebrow when he turned to look at her. “What are you doing?”
“I’m going with you. We’ll need to make a list. I probably have most of what you need.”
“I appreciate the offer, but you were heading into town. You don’t need to change your plans for me.”
She tilted her chin and looked him straight in the eye. “I’m not doing it for you. I’m doing it for those two little ones...” Lips pulled tight, she closed her eyes for a moment. “If they came to find you on a Saturday, it’s an emergency situation. With me, kids always come first.” Her normally open expression had a bit of steel in it as she narrowed her gaze.
Garrett sighed. “I have no doubt about that.”
“I have a grandmother, a mother, sisters and cousins that will help.”
He couldn’t imagine that kind of large family. Of course, this morning he couldn’t imagine being a father, either. Unfortunately, they didn’t have any other options. Innocents couldn’t be allowed to suffer because of his mistakes.
“Besides, you forgot these.” She held up the two folders. Folders that he was sure told an ugly story.
He had to make this right. As much as he wanted to keep his distance from Little Miss Sunshine, he had a feeling he needed her more than he’d ever wanted, or needed, another person. He glanced behind her, scanning the fanciful farm. Especially a delicate female who seemed to live in another world altogether.
* * *
Anjelica kept her gaze hard and firm as she looked back up at Garrett. He sighed and turned his back to her, his hand resting on the wood rail. The muscles in his neck coiled. What kind of man didn’t know he had a family?
Her cousin Yolanda said good looks spoiled a man. She would have argued that Garrett Kincaid was a solid man, a bit standoffish and a loner, but good. Now she wasn’t so sure.
His jaw flexed as he unlocked the door. She gritted her teeth. How could men be so...so careless?
They entered the apartment in silence. He had a son and a baby daughter he didn’t know about. She pulled her gaze away from his jawline and studied her hands. How could she have mistaken him as a man of honor?
Anjelica, judging Officer Kincaid won’t solve any of the problems. You don’t know the whole story. She knew when it came to children she had to be careful of filtering thoughts through a haze of resentment.
Holding her daughter happened only in dreams. Esperanza would have been five next month. Tomorrow’s date was burned into her brain, the day she’d lost her precious baby girl. During this time, between Esperanza’s death and due date, her emotions were always closer to the surface. A twist of the silver charms on her wrist helped her calm the negative thoughts.
Garrett moved to the kitchen counter that ran against the back wall. Redirecting her thoughts, she focused on him as he put the gun in a safe.
At the counter, he turned and leaned, arms crossed. His uniform stretched over broad shoulders. “Okay, enough of the silent treatment. You’re bound to have questions.”
“It’s really none of my business.” She scanned the bare room. Did he dismiss the dangers of his job the way Steve had waved off her worries of his joining the Marines? “Well, other than you’re moving two children into my very small garage apartment. There’s no real kitchen. And you have a very dangerous job.”
The urge to scowl at him needed to be tempered. Her family lived by the rule of speaking your mind if it was helpful, kind and true. She wasn’t doing a good job of it. There was always something helpful and encouraging to say, and if she tried hard enough, the right words would find their way to her lips. “What you’re doing is a good thing. You stepping up and taking the kids, even if it is a little late.” She bit her lip. That did not count as kind, it wasn’t helpful and it might not be true. Her thoughts were going crazy.
Garrett stood across the room and stared at her, a tight, closed look on his hard face. “Do you have any questions or just observations?”
“Sorry.” Okay, she needed to come straight out and ask. “You have a young son and baby daughter that you didn’t know about? How does that happen?”
Leaning back against the counter again, his masculine knuckles turned white as he gripped the edge. “I’m not sure. Right now I’m feeling a bit blindsided.” With his head down, he seemed to be studying his boots. “It seems the boy’s mine. The girl has another father.” He raised his head and looked her in the eye. “There’s no excuse for abandoning a child, but I...I left town hoping to leave all my ex-wife’s drama behind. I didn’t know I was leaving behind a son to deal with the mess.”
She didn’t understand the blow to her emotions from hearing he had been married. Why would that even bother her?
With a heavy sigh, he stalked to the table and sat in one of the two chairs. Playing with the empty saltshaker, he never looked up. Anjelica moved to the other chair and waited.
“I met Viviana in the fifth grade. She was my best friend. By the time our freshman year came around, I was in love. I spent those four years rescuing her. When I left for Afghanistan, we stayed in touch. According to her letters, she’d made better choices and gotten out of her father’s house. He was not a nice man.” He looked up briefly, but with a sigh he lowered his head again.
“She said she was waiting for me to return home. We met at the airport and I asked her to marry me right there.” His focus moved from the simple saltshaker to the balcony door. “Looking back, I realize I had made her into a woman of my dreams. I imagined us with a home and family that even included a dog. While reading her letters, I created a life in my head that wasn’t real.”
Wrapping her hands over her upper arms, she tried to stave off the cold that crept into her veins. All of the letters Steve wrote her during his tour in the Middle East had been about home, too. He talked about the long hours of doing nothing. Telling her how he reread her letters over and over to get a piece of normal. He would draw pictures of the farm and the projects he planned to start when he got home. There were pages where he wrote of their daughter’s future and all the kids they would raise. Her heart twisted. Don’t go there, Anjelica.
She packed thoughts of her husband away and fixed her attention on Garrett. “How old were you when you joined?”
“Eighteen. I had just graduated and didn’t have many options.” He blew a hard puff of air. “The Marines were a blessing. They gave me focus and a sense of belonging, but it wasn’t always easy.” Standing, he rubbed the back of his neck. “I thought we were ready for the next phase of our life. I wanted to feel normal.” He gave a harsh laugh. “That didn’t work out so well.”
Garrett walked to the French doors and opened one of them. The breeze released some of the tension that had weighed down the room. Four saxophone cases lined the wall. They were the only personal items other than a small stack of mail in his living quarters. The quietness lingered.
He reached for one of the cases. She’d heard him play several times, usually at night when he came in from work. Sometimes it was slow and soothing, other times energetic and raw, but it was always good. The music would wrap around her while she worked with the clay. She didn’t feel so alone when he played.
Dropping the strap, he stared off through the French door. With a sigh, he joined her at the table. “It’s hard allowing the old nightmare to resurface. A few weeks after we were married, Ed, one of her boyfriends she forgot to mention, started calling. Viviana ran to him, until he beat her—then she’d come home and I would patch her up. That had always been my job. After several attempts of trying to report him, I had to get out. At one point she threatened to tell the police I had hurt her. My career was on the line. I left. Changed my number. Deleted hers so I wouldn’t be tempted to check on her. I made a clean break. I made sure she had no way to get in touch with me. If I had just left her one way to contact me...” With his elbow on the table, he pressed his forehead into his palm.
She heard resentment in each word. If his ex-wife had hidden the boy from him, he had every right to be angry. “Why are you taking the girl, too? It sounds like there’s a chance the boy is not even yours. Why did they come to you for placement?”
“I guess we were still married when she gave birth, so my name is on the birth certificate and there’s no one else.” He shrugged. “As a little girl, she had dreams of living in the county with lots of animals.” He snorted. “I promised her I’d make her dreams come true. Maybe I can make good on the promise with her children. Also, I’d guess there is a fifty-fifty chance the boy is mine. I couldn’t take one without the other—she’s his baby sister. Can you imagine how much he would hate me if I didn’t bring his sister home with him?” He scanned the room and blew out a hard puff of air.
She still struggled with the idea of not knowing about a child and then taking in two. “Where’s their mother now? Why have they been taken from her?”
His jaw did the tick thing again and he nodded to the two folders she had set on the table. “Everything about them and their mother is in the folders.” He shook his head.
Picking up one of the folders, she flipped it open. “You haven’t seen the children?” It was the baby girl. Her heart melted at the big eyes, perfect tiny lips and tons of tight curls that surrounded the sweetest face. “Oh, Garrett, she’s adorable. Look at her.”
As if wearing a neck brace, he turned and gave the eight-by-ten photo a quick glance. With his attention back on the door on the opposite wall, he nodded. “She looks like her mother.” He moved away. “For now, I should clean out the office so it can become their room.”
“What happened? How’d she lose the kids? What about the fath...?” She flipped to the next photo. Shocked by the scene, her stomach heaved. The folder fell from her grasp. She leaned over and braced herself. “I’m gonna be sick.”
Garrett rushed to her side. He muttered under his breath as he pulled her hair back. “Do you need the restroom?”
Forcing in deep breaths, eyes closed, she shook her head. “No, I’m fine now.”
“I should have warned you the crime-scene photos might be in there.” He went to the mini refrigerator and pulled out a bottle of water. “Here.” He pressed the cold plastic into her hand.
Sitting up, she leaned her head back. She adjusted her scarf. Knowing horrible things happened was one thing; seeing them in pictures was a completely different story. How was she going to get that out of her head? “Oh, Garrett, those poor babies. We have to help them.”
Garrett pulled the other chair next to her and placed his hand on her shoulder at the base of her neck. “I’m sorry. I should’ve looked through them before letting you see the folders. I was...just avoiding.”
“Were they in the room? Did they see what happened to their mother?”
“The boy might’ve been.” He was so close she could hear his breathing. “Pilar is a baby and, hopefully, won’t have any memory.” Leaning back, he pushed his hair away from his forehead.
With the folder in hand, she was careful not to look at the bloody photos, instead focusing on the picture of the little girl and her information sheet. “Her name is Pilar Rose. She just turned ten months old.” Making sure to breathe, she reached for the second folder.
Hand flat on the folder, he spread his long fingers over it as if to protect her from the contents. “I just want to see him.” She held her hand out for the deceptively plain folder Garrett covered. “I’m prepared now. I was caught off guard. Let me see them.”
