A Mother to Love

Taking a break, they sat on the porch steps and talked about different kinds of flowers. Though Carly knew more about flower colors than kinds, she mentioned roses and tulips. Planting bulbs in autumn would add colorful spring blossoms to the landscape. Angie made a note in her book to help her remember.

“What do you like to do for fun, Carly?” The question came out of nowhere.

Carly looked thoughtful as if she had too many to list. Yet no ideas seemed to come.

“How about swings and slides at the park?” Angie watched her face brighten.

“We have swings at school.”

“Can you go up high on them?” She watched the girl’s face twist in thought.

“I don’t know how.” She faced Angie. “Do you?”

Tender feelings slid through Angie. “You’ll learn when you’re bigger, but one day we’ll have to take you to a park. Your daddy can push you a little bit high.”

“Really?” Her eyes sparkled. “And can we go on the slides?”

“You can. I think I’m too big.” She pictured herself trying to squeeze her hips down a slide. The picture made her smile. “Does your daddy take you to the park?”

“No, but we go shopping and buy groceries. And he takes me to the hamburger place that has tunnels and ladders, and he watches me play.”

“That’s fun. I don’t think they had that kind of play area when I was a little girl. You’re lucky.”

“I am, because my daddy is fun.” Her head lowered as if in thought and then popped up. “Daddy reads me stories, and we laugh. And he buys us pizza.”

“You are a very lucky girl.”

“Maybe he’ll buy you pizza, too.” She looked thoughtful before nodding her head. “I’ll tell him to.”

Angie silenced her gasp. “You don’t have to. Let’s see if he thinks of it by himself.” All she needed was to have him think she’d put the bug in Carly’s ear to invite her for pizza.

Carly nodded. “Okay. Let’s see.”

“See what?” Rick came around the corner of the house, a bright smile on his face.

“Nothing.” Angie jumped up. “We were talking about playing on swings and slides at a park. Carly would like that.”

His eyes widened. “Good. We have a park somewhere near us. Good idea.”

She suspected Rick hadn’t thought of the park. The child needed fun and ways to play, and she wondered what they did together other than grocery shop and eat burgers and pizza. Little kids needed stimuli.

His unexpected appearance surprised her. “Are you done with everything?”

“I think so. Do you want to check?”

The thought ran through her head and out again. “No. Later. Let’s go to the nursery for the flowers.”

“Let’s go.” Carly clapped her hands and skipped toward the car.

Rick reached for her, but before he captured Carly she spun away from him toward the car, wearing a silly grin as she beckoned to him to follow. A tender feeling oozed through Angie as she viewed the father-daughter antics. Though she had lost confidence in men and had no desire to marry, today a sweet sensation ran through her, and for once she understood the joy of being a family. With the image in her mind, she melted.

* * *

Rick pulled into Sunburst Garden and parked. He hadn’t felt this alive in years. Carly’s smile and excitement sent guilt creeping up his back. Why hadn’t he thought to teach her things like planting a flower or doing simple tasks? She’d cozied up to Angie as if she was a female Pied Piper. Though logic said he should feel a bit envious, he didn’t. Seeing his daughter’s spirit higher than the treetops—and over such simple things—lifted him into the clouds.

He jumped from the car and headed for Carly to unhook her booster seat, but she’d already loosened the belts and slipped out of the shoulder strap as Angie opened the door for her. She bounded from the SUV, skipping around them as if she had swallowed jumping beans. The sight made him laugh. “You are a bundle of energy.”

“I’m excited ’cause Angie said I can help plant flowers.” Carly gazed at Angie with admiration. “I’ve never planted flowers.”

“Okay, but if you’re good at it, then I’ll put you to work at home.” He gave Carly a wink.

Carly loved the idea and skittered ahead of them through the nursery gate into the outdoor area filled with all types of perennial plants.

He held back, longing for time to talk with Angie, but he suspected that wouldn’t be easy with Carly’s exuberance.

Angie found a shopping cart and placed an empty flower flat in it and then pushed it along with Carly hanging on to the handle. Rick followed, amazed at his little girl’s attraction to Angie and the whole idea of planting flowers.

Angie beckoned her toward the annuals inside the building and pointed to a flat. “See these flowers, Carly?”

She nodded. “They’re pretty.”

“They’re called wave petunias, and they’re beautiful when they grow in a garden, so I want you to pick out the colors that you like and put them in this box.” Angie picked up a box of pink petunias and set them in one of the little compartments. “We’ll fill this flat with all kinds of colors that you like, and they will grow so big you’ll be surprised.”

“I get to pick them myself?”

Angie nodded. “I trust you’ll do a good job, and I’ll be right here.”

Rick’s head spun hearing the dialogue between the two. Carly moved up and down the lengthy row, studying the plants as if she’d been asked to make a necklace from the crown jewels.

Angie stood back, an amazing smile on her face, her rounded cheeks rosy. Even without lipstick, her lips were pink. They curved in a warm smile. “Look at her, Rick. She’s a little treasure.”

He agreed. “I wish her mom could see this. Glenda’s work keeps her busy, and sometimes I feel she pays little attention to Carly. I hope she doesn’t notice.” He lowered his head and faced his own weakness. “And sometimes I don’t think I’m much better.”

“Come on, Rick. You’re a loving person, and you dote on her when you talk about her.”

“I know. I love her more than I can say, but sometimes I’m at a loss. I never would have thought to let her select flowers for a garden or help plant them. It’s something a mother thinks about, I guess. Watching you, I feel inadequate.”

“Stop thinking like that. You’re creative. At Carly’s age, she’s learning all the time, and you can help teach her things she’ll remember always.”

“You’re giving me more credit than I deserve, but thanks. I hope you’re right.” He touched her arm, feeling her soft skin beneath his fingers. “I’m definitely learning from you.”

She gave a head shake and shifted her gaze to Carly, who’d begun to fill the flat with thoughtful choices.

“Angie.” He drew in a breath, not wanting to ruin the moment or the day. “You’d make a wonderful mother. I really can’t understand why some man hasn’t snapped you up before now.” The only thing that made him know she’d heard him was the expression on her face.

Her brow furrowed a moment before softening. “To be honest, Rick, I was never asked.”

He drew back, unable to grasp what she’d said. “You’re kidding. That can’t be.”

“But it is. I don’t tell people this. Once I thought I’d found my true love, but...” She shook her head. “It wasn’t meant to be, and after I looked back on it, I realized it would have been a mistake. I’ve never been open enough to arouse a man’s interest, since...since—”

“It was the motorcycle guy, wasn’t it?” He recalled the impact the man’s death had on her.

She nodded. “We were too different. He knew better than I did. I still thought he’d ask me, but he was killed before he might have.” She gave him a feeble grin. “But the ‘might have’ is unlikely. He loved his bike, camping and hanging out with the guys and their girls. That wasn’t me.”

“Then what was the attraction?” The image bogged in his mind. The picture she painted wasn’t the Angie he knew.

“I think it was the unknown, the surprise and unfamiliar. I was pretty straightforward. Raised to get an education and a good job. Do all the right things. Go to church. He lived on the edge, and I wished I could be more like that, but...”

“But it doesn’t suit you.” Angie had become a woman he admired, one who would be a wonderful mother and a loving wife, a wife who would pitch in and work toward their mutual dreams.

Dreams. The word stopped him. His dream, not hers, and he’d already warned himself. His heart sank.

“It didn’t suit me. Not at all. When I really thought about the lifestyle, it frightened me. Still, I wanted to do something to stimulate my very mundane life.”

“And your faith? Are you still a churchgoer?”

She looked away, tension tightening her jaw. “No, I drifted. Too far, I’m afraid.”

He slipped his arm around her shoulders. “It’s never too far or too late, Angie. God’s bigger than that. Your faith is still there. You just put it to sleep for a while, but with sleep comes renewed energy. Faith doesn’t stray too far.”

Angie nodded, her gaze shifting to Carly. “You’ve done a wonderful job with her, Rick.” She strode to Carly’s side and helped her set the flat of flowers on the bottom shelf of the cart. “Now, let’s look for some roses.”

Carly’s eyes widened. “Roses smell pretty, but they have thorns.”

Rick slipped behind Carly, his hands resting on her shoulders. “Sometimes beautiful things have thorns that scare you away, but if you’re really careful, they’re worth all the trouble.” His gaze slipped to Angie, and he sensed she’d caught the analogy. From her expression he’d surprised her as much as his admission surprised him. He caught the handle of the basket. “Which way?”

Angie pointed toward the outside, and when she turned, he followed her. They made their way down the rows and found the roses in an area close to the back of the nursery where many kinds and colors were on display. She and Carly studied the plants, and Angie settled on some Knock Out roses, which she said bloomed all summer. Carly picked out some long-stemmed blossoms.

“Good choice, Carly,” he said. Angie signaled him to lift the plants into the cart while she watched Carly study other ones. An expression on her face warned him she had something on her mind. “Are you sure you want all these?”

“I love them.” She smiled at Carly. “This young lady did a good job of choosing some beautiful roses. But...”

When she faltered, he knew he’d been right. “But what?”

Angie eyed Carly before answering. “It’ll take a long time to plant these, and I’m thinking that today may not be the best day.”

He raised an eyebrow, letting her know he suspected she had left some things unspoken. “How long can flowers sit without being planted?”

“No more than a day or so. I’ll need to keep them watered.”

“What about tomorrow? Carly and I could come after church and finish the job.” His pulse skipped at his impulsiveness. She may have had enough of them. “That’s if you’d like us to.”

Her face brightened. “I’d love you to come if you really don’t mind.”

Carly’s eyes sparkled. “Can I help?”

“You sure can.” Angie slipped her arm around Carly’s shoulders and gave her a hug. “I’ve never had such a good helper in my whole life.”

“Daddy.” Carly bounced on her toes. “Can we come tomorrow?”

“If Angie wants to put up with us another day, we sure can.”

Carly clapped and twirled, then grabbed the handle of the cart and eyed Angie. “Are we done?”

“If you’re planting tomorrow, I have a few more ideas.” Angie chucked Carly under the chin. “What do you think?”

Carly gave a nod and waited for her to point the way.

They followed Angie down another row while his own excitement grew. With Angie’s willingness for them to return Sunday, he wanted to twirl down the rows as Carly had done. Two days with Angie felt like a gift to him as well as Carly. She made life fun and meaningful. Yet a flicker of concern tightened in his chest. He had to be careful. He’d already feared her hesitation to plant today was because of something he’d said.

“If we’re finishing the planting tomorrow...” She paused and looked at Carly. “We might have time to go to the park today.”

“The park? Really?” A gleeful giggle escaped Carly. “Can we, Daddy?”

“If we have time, why not?”

Carly jumped in place. “Why not?”

Angie gave him a wink, pleasure filling her face. She hurried down the row, selected a few more perennials, and after he loaded her choices in the cart, he pushed it toward the cashier. Many times things he longed to know flew into his head, but those kinds of questions needed time. Instead he trod lightly. A lifetime didn’t happen in a day. Angie clung to a private past she seemed unwilling to share. He could learn a lesson from her silence. Already he’d revealed too much.

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