Between Friends

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I need a shoulder to cry on. If I had the money I’d phone, but our budget just doesn’t allow for long-distance calls. There’s a reason you haven’t heard from me. Oh, Jillian, I’m pregnant again.

I couldn’t see any reason to go on the pill with Buck in Vietnam. Besides, it’s a problem with the way the Church feels about birth control, and I was hoping to avoid facing the issue. Then I met Buck in Hawaii. I know my postcard made it sound like I had the time of my life, but I didn’t.

The first day was wonderful. Buck was delayed and I got tired of sitting in the hotel room by myself and wandered out to the beach. I met a Naval Officer there, someone who likes books and music. We sat and talked for the longest time. Later I wondered what would’ve happened if I’d met Cole before I met Buck. He’d read the same books as me. Michener’s Hawaii and Leon Uris’s Exodus, and he carefully follows world news, just like I do. We got into a big debate about what’s happening in the Middle East, and that was just before the Six-Day War in Israel. He knew about the Palestine Liberation Organization, which I’d never heard of until then. Meeting him made me realize how much I’ve missed by marrying Buck. Oh, Jillian, I’m afraid I’ve made a terrible mistake.

What I’m about to write next you have to promise never to tell anyone. Time slipped away from me while I was talking to Cole and I hurried back to the hotel to see if Buck had arrived. When I passed through the lobby I caught sight of him in the cocktail lounge. He was necking with a woman in the far corner. He didn’t see me and I pretended not to see him.

I know I should’ve confronted him about that woman right then and there, but I didn’t. I knew that if I asked about her, we’d spend the entire seven days arguing. I couldn’t bear it. Instead I’m pregnant again.

To make things worse, he wrote me the next month and said I should see a doctor because of some tropical disease he picked up. The doctor didn’t answer my questions directly, but I think it might have been V.D.

Oh, Jillian, I’m so humiliated and upset and worried. I can’t stand it anymore. I know you’ll be home from school soon. I’ve never needed to talk to you so much. Please call me as soon as you’re in town.

Lesley

July 1, 1967

Dear Lesley,

So you’re knocked up again. Hey, that’s great! Davey could use a little brother or sister. Don’t you worry. Take care of yourself, you hear?

I love you.

Buck

P.S. I don’t think it’s a good idea for you to continue working at the library in your condition.

July 3, 1967

My darling Nick,

It doesn’t look like I’m going to be able to get out of this 4th of July outing with my parents. We’ll make our own fireworks later. Meet me at midnight at the snack booth behind the football field.

Jillian

Jillian’s Diary

July 5, 1967

Mom and Dad and I are barely on speaking terms. They caught me sneaking into the house at three a.m. after meeting Nick. From the way they acted, you’d think they found us in bed naked! Dad lectured me for an entire thirty minutes and when he finished, Mom started in. Finally I couldn’t take it anymore and exploded. I’m almost twenty years old!!!