The Prince She Never Knew

‘Alyse,’ Leo said, and she opened her eyes. He was leaning forward, his eyes narrowed in concern. ‘If you’d rather, we can wait. We don’t have to consummate our marriage tonight.’

‘A reprieve?’ she said, her voice sounding cynical even to her own ears.

‘It might be more pleasant when we’re not so tired and there are fewer expectations on us,’ Leo answered with a shrug. ‘And frankly, no matter what you’ve said, you do look terrified.’

Yes, she was, but not in the way he thought. She wasn’t afraid of sex. She was afraid of it being meaningless for Leo. Did he want her at all? Was this a bore for him, a chore?

‘I promise you, I’m not afraid,’ she said when she trusted herself to speak as neutrally as he had. ‘But I am tired, so perhaps this...aspect of our marriage can wait a little while.’

Leo shrugged, as if he didn’t care either way, and that hurt too. ‘Of course. But we should both sleep in the bed. Staff see everything, and even palace employees have been known to gossip.’

She nodded, trying not to imagine lying next to Leo, his nearly bare body so close to hers. It was a big bed, after all. And she needed to learn how to manage this kind of situation. They would, after all, be sleeping in the same bed for the next...

Except, no; perhaps they wouldn’t. Perhaps they would have separate bedrooms along with separate lives, coming together only for the cameras or to create an heir.

‘That’s fine,’ she said. ‘I’ll just put some...’ She trailed off, because the only clothes in the room were her ballgown and the negligee. She didn’t like either option.

Leo glanced at the lace confection spread out on the bed. ‘It’s a big bed,’ he said dryly. ‘And I think I can control myself, even if you wear that bit of nonsense.’

Alyse swallowed, nodded. Even tried to smile, though every careless word he spoke felt like a dagger thrust to her heart. She didn’t want him to be able to control himself. She’d always known him to be cool, pragmatic, even ruthless. Yet she wanted him to be different with her, and she was honest enough to recognise that some stupid, schoolgirl part of her had secretly hoped things might change when they were finally alone.

‘Fine,’ she said and, rising from the chair, she went to the bed and swept the negligee from it before disappearing into the bathroom once more.

Leo stretched out on one side of the bed and waited for Alyse to emerge from the bathroom. He felt the conversation hadn’t gone as well as he would have liked. Alyse had seemed brittle, almost as if he’d hurt her feelings, a possibility which exasperated him. He’d thought she was as pragmatic as he was about their union, yet this new, unexpected awkwardness clearly unnerved her—as well as him.

When had he started caring about her feelings, whether she felt nervous, awkward or afraid? The whole point of this marriage, this pretence, was that he didn’t have to care. He didn’t have to engage emotions he’d purposely kept dormant for so long.

And while he might be weary of pretending—he’d done enough of it in his life, God only knew—at least this marriage, this pretence, had been his choice. His decision.

He still remembered the negotiation they’d gone through after that wretched photograph had gone viral. His father had asked to see them privately.

Alyse had flown to Maldinia a few weeks after her birthday party; her mother had accompanied her. And, when she’d walked into his father’s private study alone, Leo had been jolted by how young and vulnerable she looked, dressed simply in a plain skirt and schoolgirl’s blouse, her dark hair held back in a ponytail.

His father hadn’t minced words; he never did. Queen Sophia and her mother were friends, he told Alyse, and they’d considered a match between her and Leo. Leo knew that hadn’t exactly been true; his mother had wanted someone with slightly bluer blood than Alyse’s to marry her son. Leo had gone to that birthday party with only a vague and passing knowledge of Alyse’s existence and it was the media hype that had turned it into something else entirely.

‘In an ideal world,’ King Alessandro had said with a geniality Leo knew his father did not remotely possess, ‘you would have got to know each other, courted. Seen if you suited. But it’s not an ideal world.’

Alyse had simply stared.

Leo, of course, had known where this was going all along. He’d talked to his parents already, had received the assignment from on high. You must marry her, Leo. The public adores her. Think of what it will do for your country, your kingship.

He’d known what they really meant: what it would do for them. They’d done enough damage to Maldinia’s monarchy with their lies, affairs and careless spending. He was the only one left to clean up the mess.

He’d understood all that, but Alyse hadn’t. She’d just looked thunderstruck. She’d barely spoken for that whole meeting, just listened as the King went on about the benefits of a ‘decided’ marriage—a much more innocuous term than arranged, Leo had thought cynically. Or commanded.

She’d only spoken when she’d begun to perceive, dimly, just what kind of charade they would be perpetuating and for how long. ‘You mean,’ she’d said in a voice only a little above a whisper, ‘we have to...to pretend we’re in love?’

‘Feelings come in time, don’t they?’ Alessandro had answered with that same false joviality, and Leo had looked away. No, they didn’t. If Alessandro held up his own marriage, his own family, as an example, it showed they never came. And you couldn’t trust them anyway.

But Alyse had nodded slowly, accepting, and their engagement had been announced the next day along with them posing for requisite photos.

And the rest, Leo thought now, lacing his arms above his head, was history. Repeating itself over and over again.

The door to the bathroom opened and Alyse emerged, wearing the woman’s robe. Leo wondered if she’d try to sleep in that bulky thing. He supposed a little virginal shyness was natural.

He watched as she skirted the bed and then hesitated on the far side, her fingers playing with the sash of her robe. Leo reached for his bedside lamp.

‘Shall I turn out the light?’

‘If you like.’

Actually, he didn’t like. He was suddenly rather curious as to what Alyse looked like in the skimpy negligee. He’d seen her in plenty of designer dresses and well-coordinated outfits, hair and make-up immaculately styled, always primped to perfection.

But he’d never seen her like this—wearing a bridal nightgown, her chestnut hair loose about her shoulders, grey eyes wide, about to climb into his bed. He felt an insistent stirring of arousal; it had been a long time since he’d been with a woman. A very long time.

He switched the light off, but the moon spilling through the open windows was enough to see by anyway, and as he lay back against the pillows he saw her slip the bulky robe from her body. Dressed as she was in only the slinky negligee, the moon gilded her slender curves in silver.

He could see the shadowy vee between her breasts, the dip of her waist, the hidden juncture of her thighs. Then she slid hurriedly under the covers and lay there, rigid and unmoving.

Leo had never felt so far from sleep and, judging by how she lay there like a board, he suspected Alyse was the same. Perhaps they should have agreed to consummate their marriage tonight. At least it would have given them something to do.

He considered talking to her, but after six years of enacting this parody of love he had nothing of consequence to say, and he didn’t think she had either. Which was how he’d wanted it.

Yet in the darkness and silence of that moment he felt a sudden, surprising need for conversation, even connection. Something he’d taught himself never to crave.

And he had no idea how to go about creating it now.

‘Goodnight,’ he finally said, his voice coming out gruffer than he’d meant it to, and he felt Alyse tense even more next to him.

‘Goodnight,’ she answered back, her voice so soft and sad that Leo felt caught between remorse and exasperation at her obvious emotion—and his.

With a barely suppressed sigh, he rolled onto his side, his back to Alyse, and willed himself to sleep.

CHAPTER THREE

ALYSE AWOKE GRITTY-EYED and still feeling exhausted. Lying next to Leo, she hadn’t slept well, conscious of his hard, powerful form just inches away from her even when she’d been falling into a restless doze.

Now as sunlight streamed through the windows she wondered what the day would bring. They were meant to fly to St Cristos, a private island in the Caribbean, that morning to begin their honeymoon. A week completely alone, without the distractions of television, telephones, computers or any other people at all. A week, she still hoped, when they could get to know one another properly, or even at all.

A knock sounded at the door and before Alyse could say or even think anything Leo was snaking his arm around her waist, drawing her close against the seductive heat of his body. Shock turned her rigid as she felt the hard contours of his chest and thigh against her backside—and then the unmistakable press of his erection against her bottom.

‘Vieni,’ he called and then murmured against her hair, ‘Sorry, but the staff will gossip.’

Alyse barely took in his words. She’d never been so close to him, every part of her body in exquisite contact with his. The crisp hair on his chest tickled her bare shoulders, and the feel of his arousal pressing insistently against her bottom sent sizzling darts of sensation shooting through her.

She shifted instinctively, although whether she was drawing away or closer to him she didn’t even know. She felt a new, dizzying need spiral up inside her as his own hips flexed instinctively back. Leo groaned under his breath and his arm came even more firmly around her. ‘Stop wriggling,’ he whispered, ‘Or I might embarrass myself. I’m only human, you know.’

It took a few seconds for his meaning to penetrate the fog of her dazed mind, and by that time two young serving women were wheeling in a breakfast tray, the smell of fresh coffee and breakfast rolls on the air.

Embarrass himself? Was he actually implying that he wanted her that much? That a mere wriggle of hips could send him over the edge?

Leo let go of her, straightening in bed as he adjusted the duvet over himself. ‘Grazie,’ he said and the two women giggled and blushed as they left the room, casting covert looks at the two of them in bed. Alyse realised the strap of her negligee had fallen off one shoulder, and her hair was a tangled mass about her face. Did she look like a woman who had been pleasured and loved? She felt like a mess.

She tucked her tangled hair behind her ears and willed her heart rate to slow. Despite the obvious evidence of his arousal, Leo now looked completely unfazed and indifferent as he slid out of bed and went to the breakfast tray to pour them both coffee.

‘Sorry about that. Basic bodily function, at least for a man in the morning. I think we convinced the staff, at any rate.’

Disappointment crashed through her. Basic bodily function. So, no, it had had nothing to do with her in particular. Of course it didn’t. ‘It’s fine,’ Alyse murmured. She took a steadying breath and forced herself to meet his wry gaze. ‘We’re married, after all.’

‘So we are.’ He handed her a cup of coffee and sipped his own, his expression turning preoccupied over the rim of the porcelain cup. ‘But I imagine all this pretending will get tiresome for both of us after a while.’

Alyse stared into the fragrant depths of her coffee. ‘Like you said, the press will get bored of us now that we’re married. As long as we seem happy in public, they won’t really care.’ It hurt to say it, to imply that that was what she wanted.

‘Perhaps.’ Leo nodded slowly, and Alyse imagined he was wondering just how soon he could return to his simple, solitary life.

And when he did what would she do? Over the last few months she’d bolstered her flagging spirits by reminding herself that, just like Leo, she had a duty. A role. As princess and later Queen of Maldinia she would encourage and love her people. She would involve herself in her country, its charities and industry, and in doing so bring hope to a nation.

She tried to hold onto that idea now, but it seemed like so much airy, arrogant nonsense when she considered how the majority of her days were likely to be spent: in loneliness and isolation, separated from a husband who was perfectly happy with their business arrangement.

‘When do we leave for St Cristos?’ she asked, not wanting either of them to dwell on the bleak future they both clearly envisioned.

‘We leave the palace at eleven o’clock for a public appearance in the front courtyard. Photo opportunity and all that.’ He smiled and Alyse saw the cynicism in the twist of his lips, the flatness in his navy eyes. He never used to be so cynical, she thought. Pragmatic, yes, and even cold, but he’d approached their engagement with a brisk and accepting efficiency she’d tried to match, rather than this jaded resentment.

Was he feeling as she did, that marriage had changed something between them, made it worse? Pretending after the vows had been said seemed a greater travesty than before, something she’d never considered as Leo’s fiancée. She didn’t think Leo had considered it either.

‘I’ll leave you to get dressed,’ he said, putting down his coffee cup. ‘I’ll meet you downstairs in the foyer a few minutes before eleven.’

Wordlessly Alyse nodded, seeing the practicality of it yet feeling a needling disappointment anyway. Was every interaction going to involve a way to avoid each other? Would her life consist of endless awkward exchanges without any real intimacy or emotion, ever? Something would have to change. She couldn’t live like this; she wouldn’t.

Maybe, she thought with no more than a flicker of weary hope, it would change on St Cristos.

Several hours later they boarded the royal jet and Leo disappeared into a study in the rear of the plane. Alyse had been on the jet before when she’d flown between England and Maldinia, yet the opulent luxury always amazed her. Her own family was wealthy and privileged—her father had built a financial empire and her mother had been an heiress—but they weren’t this kind of rich. They weren’t royal.

You are now.

It still felt unreal. If she didn’t actually feel like Leo’s wife, how would she ever feel like a princess? Like a queen?

Pushing the thought aside, she made herself comfortable on one of the leather sofas in the main cabin of the plane. Just as planned, she and Leo had made their appearance outside the palace doors. A crowd had surrounded the palace; posies and bouquets of flowers had been piled up by the gates. Alyse had spent a few minutes chatting, smiling and laughing, while Leo had looked on, his smile faint and a little bit wooden. While the people loved the handsome, enigmatic prince, he didn’t engage the crowds the way she did, and never had. This, she knew, was why Maldinia’s monarchy needed her. Why Leo needed her.

Nothing else.

Now, with the crowds and reporters gone, she wondered just how she and Leo would spend their time alone. Judging by the way he’d disappeared into the jet’s study, alone was the operative word.

She felt a sudden stab of annoyance, which at least felt stronger than the misery that had been swamping her since their marriage. No matter how fake their relationship was, Leo’s determined ignoring of her was just plain rude.

Fuelled by her outrage, Alyse rose from the sofa and went to find Leo in the study. He sat at a desk, his dark head bent over a sheaf of papers. He was dressed for travel in a crisp blue button-down shirt and dark trousers, but he still looked magnificent, his muscles taut and powerful underneath the starched cotton of his shirt. He glanced up as she approached, his dark brows snapping together.

‘What is it?’

‘I just wondered if you intended to spend the entire time in your study,’ she said, her voice coming out close to a snap, and Leo looked at her in something close to bewilderment.

‘Does it matter?’

Impatience warred with hurt. ‘A bit, Leo. I understand you don’t want things to change between us, but a little conversation could be nice. Or are we going to spend the next week trying to avoid each other?’

He still looked flummoxed, and now also a bit annoyed. ‘I’m not trying to avoid you.’

‘It just comes naturally, then?’

‘We’ve been on this plane for ten minutes,’ he replied, his voice becoming so very even. ‘Don’t you think you can entertain yourself for a little while longer?’

Alyse shook her head impatiently. She could see how Leo might think she was being unreasonable, but it was so much more than this one journey. ‘I can entertain myself just fine,’ she said. ‘But I don’t particularly enjoy living in isolation.’

Leo’s mouth thinned into a hard line. ‘The plane will take off in a few minutes. I’ll join you in the cabin before it does.’

His words seemed so grudgingly given, yet Alyse knew at this point it was better simply to accept them at face value. Now was not the time to force a confrontation, to confess that she didn’t think she could live like this for so much as a morning, much less a lifetime. This was, after all, what she’d agreed to all those years ago when King Alessandro had spelled it out so plainly.

Feelings come in time, don’t they? She’d built her hopes on that one throwaway remark, clearly meant only to appease her. She’d lived for six years believing it could be true. She might as well have built castles in the air.

Leo had already turned back to his papers, so after a second’s uneasy pause Alyse turned around and went to the cabin.

He didn’t come out for take-off. Her annoyance turned to a simmering anger as the staff served her sparkling water instead of the champagne left chilling in a bucket, clearly meant for the two of them to toast their marriage.

She avoided their eyes and reached for her e-reader, bitterly glad she’d filled it with newly purchased books before she’d left. Clearly she’d be getting a lot of reading done on her honeymoon.

A few hours into the flight Leo finally made an appearance. ‘Sorry about that,’ he said, sitting across from her. ‘I had a bit of work to catch up on before we go off the grid.’

Despite his casually made apology, Alyse couldn’t let go of her anger. ‘If you don’t want your staff to gossip, perhaps you should be a bit more attentive to your bride,’ she answered tartly. ‘We’ve only been married for one day, you know.’

Leo stared at her, nonplussed. ‘Even couples wildly in love have work to do.’

‘Even on their honeymoon?’

He narrowed his gaze. ‘I have a duty to my country—’

‘This whole marriage is about duty.’ She cut him off and realised too late how shrewish and hurt she sounded. How ridiculous, considering the nature of their relationship.

‘Careful,’ he said softly, glancing at the closed cabin doors.

‘Our whole life is going to be about being careful,’ she retorted before she could stop herself. She hated how her hurt was spilling out of her. She’d kept it hidden for so long, why was she weakening now?

‘And you always knew that.’ The glance he gave her was repressive. ‘I think we should save this conversation for another, more private time.’

‘At least I have a conversation to look forward to, then.’ Leo just stared at her, and Alyse looked away, trying to reclaim some of the cool composure she’d cloaked herself with during the last few years. She’d never lit into him like this, never showed him how much his indifference hurt her or how much more she wanted from him.

‘What’s wrong with you?’ he asked after a moment and he sounded both curious and exasperated. ‘You’ve never acted like this before.’

‘We’ve never been alone like this before,’ she answered, her face still averted. ‘I just don’t want you to ignore or avoid me for the entire week. I’ll go crazy.’

Leo was silent for a long moment. ‘I don’t mean to ignore or avoid you,’ he said finally. ‘I’m just acting as we always have. I thought you accepted the nature of our relationship—preferred it, as I do.’

Alyse struggled to keep her face composed, her voice even, but his words hurt so much. Too much. ‘I’ve accepted it,’ she said carefully. ‘But it feels different now. We’re married, after all, and we’re going to spend more time together. Time alone. It would be nice if we could enjoy it, at least.’

That was so much less than she wanted, but at least it was a start—if Leo agreed.

He didn’t answer, just reached for the champagne and poured two flutes, the bubbles fizzing and bursting against the crystal sides. ‘I suppose that’s not an unreasonable request,’ he said eventually, and Alyse didn’t know whether to laugh or cry at his grudging tone.

‘I’m glad you think so,’ she answered, and accepted a glass of champagne.

He eyed her evenly. ‘I suppose we should have discussed our expectations of what our married life would look like beforehand.’

‘Would it have made any difference?’

‘Not to me, perhaps.’ He raised his glass. ‘To what shall we toast?’

Alyse couldn’t think of a single thing. ‘To the future,’ she finally said, and heard the bleakness in her voice. ‘Whatever it may hold.’

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