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“Yes. I’m all the family they have left. The older boy is Caleb Rhodes and the younger is Mark.” Her soulful eyes met his. “And you are our last hope to stay together.”
Philip didn’t want that kind of responsibility. He wasn’t the marrying kind. He didn’t want or need a family. And from the sound of it, it was obvious that a family was something that Bella both wanted and needed.
Bitterness filled Philip. He couldn’t get married. That would require him to love deeply and Philip couldn’t bring himself to do that. His father had loved his mother so much that when she’d died in childbirth, he’d died, too.
The workers at the orphanage had whispered how sad it was when a man died of a broken heart from loving too hard. Even at the age of five, Philip had known that his father had hung himself in the barn. He’d seen him do it but had never told anyone.
Now here stood a stranger with two children who expected him to marry her. All women expected love to come with marriage eventually. He couldn’t give her his heart. What if he carried his father’s gene of weakness? Would he rather kill himself than live with the pain of knowing he’d never see his wife, the one who held his heart, again?
* * *
Bella Wilson watched the emotions rush across Philip’s face. He was a handsome man with deep blue eyes and straw-colored hair. There was a small bump on the bridge of his nose, which had probably been broken sometime in the past. She thought the bump gave his face character.
Was Philip Young a take-charge man? Her ex-fiancé, Marlow Brooks, had been a take-charge man, but when she didn’t want to follow his lead, he’d called off their engagement. The memory still stung. What had he expected her to do? Put the boys in an orphanage? There was no way Bella would allow Mary’s children to be sent away. She had foolishly thought that she and Marlow would raise the boys and give them a happy home. Marlow had disagreed and broken their engagement.
Bella wanted to prove to Philip that she had a backbone. So far she’d been timid with him, but her future, and the future of her nephews, depended on this man. Exhaustion had about taken its toll, but Bella knew she had to be strong for the boys’ sake. She squared her shoulders and lifted her head high, then said, “Look, you placed the advertisement and I have arrived in answer to it. Are you going to marry me or not?”
He swallowed. Philip ignored her question and asked one of his own. “What did you mean when you said that I’m your last hope to stay together?”
She wrapped her arms around her waist and looked to the little boys. “Mary and her husband, Jim, owed more than they owned. So there is no money to raise the boys. Before I knew that my sister’s life had all been a lie, I quit my job and hurried to Denver, Colorado. Upon arriving I learned that they didn’t have the money that she and her husband had led everyone to believe they did. So their debtors came and took everything Mary and Jim did have and then the bank froze their money to pay off their home mortgages. All I had left was what I brought with me and those two small boys with their small bags.” Tears pricked the backs of her eyes. She fought to keep the moisture from falling. “Now I have no money, no way to feed them and no place for them to live.”
“So why didn’t you continue on to Dove Creek?”
“I ran out of money and the stage refused to take me any farther. Thanks to Cara and John I learned that you’d be arriving soon and they said we could stay with them until you did.” Bella heard the desperation in her voice and swallowed hard. Would he abandon her and the boys to their fate? She’d answered an advertisement expecting him to marry her. It never dawned on her that he might not have placed it.
Bella gnawed at her bottom lip. Marrying Philip would assure the boys’ security. She’d been wary of who might be at the end of the trail, but now that she’d met him, Bella knew God had a plan. If only Philip would see it, too—then she’d be able to relax.
His deep sigh drew her attention. “Where do we go from here?” he asked.
She shrugged. “I’m still waiting to see if we are getting married. If not, then I will have to decide what I will do and you can go on with your life.” Bitterness laced her words and Bella wished she could take them back. Her life had changed so much in the last few months.
He nodded but didn’t say anything.
What must he think? He’d just been told she was his mail-order bride. A bride he’d not sent for. He could go on with his life and Bella couldn’t hold it against him. She’d gladly taken on her nephews because they were her family and she loved them. Philip didn’t have such feelings and wasn’t obligated to marry her.
Bella offered him what she knew was a weak smile. “It’s all right, Philip, I understand. You didn’t write the advertisement. I’m sorry I sounded resentful.” She pushed away from the table. “God will provide a way.” Were they empty words? Would the Lord really take care of her and the boys? Bella had to believe He would.
Philip pushed back his chair. “Give me time to think about this, Bella. It’s sudden for me.” His gaze moved past her to the two little boys. “And a lot of responsibility. But I’m willing to consider what is best for everyone.”
That was all she could ask, and yet Bella wanted to ask so much more of him. Instead she nodded her understanding.
Chapter Two (#uf26b063b-65f3-57d8-808f-7581143f8c29)
The sadness on her face tugged at Philip’s heart. He looked to the two boys, who were staring back at him. “Come on, boys, help me put the horse away.”
They clambered down from the couch. The older boy looked up at him. He watched the younger one slip his small hand into his brother’s. Philip assured them, “You don’t have to come, if you don’t want to.”
The two looked at each other. Both seemed hesitant.
They were so small and unsure of what to do. Their little eyes were filled with a deep sorrow that could only be placed there by the loss of one’s parents. How many children had he met in the orphanage, where he’d grown up, with that same lost, hurt stare?
Philip kneeled down in front of them. “Look, fellas. You don’t have to go with me. I’m going to put the horse away and maybe find the old yellow cat that lives in the barn.”
“There is a kitty in the barn?” Mark asked with new interest.
Philip stood. “Last time I was here there was. He’s old, so I like to check on him, and sometimes I sneak a little milk from the cow to give the old cat a treat.”
Mischief replaced the look of loss in Mark’s eyes. “Can I help you sneak the milk?”
Philip started to the door. “You sure can, and if we hurry, we can be back in the house before it gets dark.”
Mark’s little boots sounded on the wooden floor behind him. “What color is the cat?”
Philip stopped by the door and pulled down both little boys’ coats. He held them out to the boys. Mark took his and thrust his arms into the sleeves while Philip answered, “He’s yellow with white stripes all over.”
Caleb looked to Bella one more time.
She smiled at him and motioned for him to go on. Her soft voice ordered, “Be good for Mr. Young and do as he says.”
That was all the encouragement the little boy needed. “Does the cat have a name?” Caleb asked, taking his own coat and then following Philip and Mark outside.
Philip untied the horse and walked him into the barn. He rubbed the horse’s velvety nose. “Cara calls him Sunny.”
Mark ran deeper into the barn. Horses of all colors looked out over their stall doors at the little boy as he passed. “Here, kitty, kitty,” he called in a soft voice.
“Caleb, take Mark up to the loft. That’s where Sunny likes to hang out.” Philip fluffed the older boy’s soft blond hair. “Just be careful up there.”
“Mark! Come on!” Caleb yelled. He hurried to the ladder that led up into the hayloft. “Mr. Young says the cat might be in the loft.”
Philip chuckled. Both boys scrambled up the ladder. He listened as they searched the barn for the cat. Tiredness weighed on him like a wet blanket as he rubbed down the horse and poured feed into the bucket in its stall. He picked up each of the horse’s hooves and checked them for rocks.
As he worked, Philip listened to the boys rooting around in the hay above him. They seemed like nice little boys who needed a father figure. Just like he had at the age of twelve, six years ago, when John Young and his wife, Rebecca, had adopted him. John had been a good parent to him. Still, the thought of his own birth father troubled Philip.
“What are they doing up there?” Bella asked.
He’d been so deep in his work that he hadn’t heard her come into the barn. Philip stood and stretched out his back. “Looking for the cat.”
Her face was tilted upward as she tried to see the boys. Dark circles surrounded her heavily lashed blue eyes. She’d been through a lot over the last few weeks and Philip’s heart went out to her.
Caleb called from above. “Mr. Young?”
He looked up, too. “Yes?”
The little boy’s blond head popped through the railings. “We found a cat, but I’m not sure it’s Sunny.”
“What makes you think it isn’t Sunny?” Bella eyed the loft warily.
Philip frowned. He realized that the old tomcat normally would have come out as soon as he heard voices. Why hadn’t he been paying better attention to the boys? Philip just prayed that whatever kind of cat they found up there, it was a friendly one.
“Come see.” Mischief filled the boy’s smile.
Philip chuckled. Caleb reminded him of his younger self. He seemed like the adventurous, fun-loving type. He looked back to where Bella still stood looking up into the hayloft. Her tan coat hugged her body and she crossed her arms about her middle. “Are you coming?” he asked.
She shook her head. “No, if it’s all the same to you. I’ll stay down here.”
Philip nodded. Curiosity drove him up the ladder. Bent over at the waist, he gazed about. The loft was beginning to look like a storage shed. Tools, old furniture and wooden crates filled the space. “Where are you two?”
Caleb stepped out from behind a pile of furniture. “Over here.” He disappeared again.
He walked toward the boy and stepped around the rubble of broken furniture. He found the boys crouched down staring into a pile of hay. He cleared his throat and caught their attention. “What are you two looking at?”
Mark ignored his question and asked one of his own. “I thought you said Sunny was a boy cat.”
Philip grinned. “He is.”
Caleb tried to muffle his laughter. “I don’t think so, Mr. Young,” he said.
Mark scooted back so that Philip could see what they’d discovered. A mama cat lay on her side nursing three kittens. She was yellow with big green eyes that didn’t look happy to have her secret space invaded.
“Well, I guess you are right, boys. Daddy cats usually don’t take care of their kittens. She can keep the name, though, don’t you think?” He kneeled down beside Caleb.
Both little boys nodded. Mark reached out a hand to touch one of the kittens and the mama cat hissed up at him.
“Don’t touch them, Mark. She don’t want us to,” Caleb said as he grabbed Mark’s hand and pulled it back.
Philip agreed. He stood slowly. “Come on, boys, let’s give the little family some privacy while Sunny feeds her young.”
Mark’s bottom lip shot out. “I want to stay and pet them.”
Caleb shook his head. “Remember what Aunt Bella said, Mark. We better do as Mr. Young says.” He tugged on his little brother’s shirt.
Still not pleased at having to leave, Mark stood.
Philip looked down at them. “Boys, we best leave Sunny alone until the kittens get bigger. I’d hate for her to move them. Promise you’ll stay out of the loft until I tell you that you can come back.”
Caleb nodded and nudged his brother to do the same. Mark did so, but not with as much enthusiasm as his brother. The two boys descended the ladder first. Philip followed a little more slowly.
When he turned around, Bella was kneeling down in front of Mark. “What did you find up there?” she asked softly.
“A mama cat and kittens,” Mark said, his bottom lip still pooched out. “Mr. Young told us to leave them alone. Do we have to, Aunt Bella?”
She looked up at him. Philip felt as if he could drown in her pretty blue eyes. To avoid them, he bent down and picked up a piece of straw. He chewed on the end of it, waiting for Bella to look away.
She turned her attention back to Mark and Caleb. “If he said so, then yes.”
Mark kicked at a clump of wet hay. Disappointment filled his face. Tears filled his eyes.
Philip watched as Caleb placed an arm around his brother’s shoulders, then looked to him. “Mr. Young? Are you still going to give the cat some milk?”
Philip looked up into the loft. “Not today. I don’t think we should disturb the mama cat, but the cow still needs to be milked. Do you boys want to help?”
Mark seemed to brighten with the prospect of milking the cow and both boys nodded. Philip looked to Bella.
She stood slowly and said, “Before she left, Cara said we could warm up the pot of stew for our supper. While you men milk, I think I’ll see if I can scrape together a pan of biscuits.” Bella walked toward the barn door but then stopped. She turned slowly and studied them. “Are you sure you don’t mind the boys helping you?” Her brow furrowed.
“I wouldn’t have asked for their help if I didn’t want it,” he answered with a grin. Philip dropped a hand onto Caleb’s shoulder.
Bella nodded and then left.
Philip turned his attention back to the boys. “Looks like we have chores to do.”
“I’ve never milked a cow before.” Caleb removed his arm from Mark’s shoulders.
“Me, neither.” Mark stooped down and picked up a piece of straw. He placed it between his teeth and chewed.
Philip tried not to smile as he realized Mark was imitating him. The boys needed a man in their lives. Could he follow in his adoptive father’s footsteps and adopt the two boys as his own? Bella would have to be part of the package. He couldn’t imagine her letting him raise the boys alone and, truth be told, Philip didn’t want to. But he also didn’t want to fall in love. Would Bella agree to a loveless marriage?
* * *
Bella missed her old job at the bakery. She even missed the early hours and found herself still rising long before the sun. If there was one thing Bella was good at, it was baking. The smell of biscuits filled the house. She loved mixing, kneading and baking bread.
Philip came through the door with both boys hot on his heels. “Woo-wee, something smells good in here.”
Mark dashed around Philip. “I got to help milk the cow.”
Caleb followed, carrying one of the milk buckets. “Me, too.” He panted under its weight.
Bella couldn’t help but smile. The boys were louder and more active than they had been since she’d taken them from their home a month ago. It appeared spending a little time with Philip had been a positive experience for the boys. She was thankful that Cara had suggested they spend the night with them so that they could all get to know each other better.
Philip put his bucket of milk on the kitchen counter and then helped Caleb with his. “You did a good job.” He patted the boy on the shoulder and offered him a warm smile.
Caleb squared his body. He stood taller and nodded his thanks. Mark hurried to the settee, where they’d left their wooden horses. He carried them to Philip and Caleb. “This one is mine. His name is Brownie. Someday I’m going to have a horse like him.”
Philip took the toy and examined it. “He looks good and sturdy. I think you have yourself a keeper there.”
“While you men study the livestock, I’m going to butter this bread and get our supper on the table.”
Bella continued to listen to Philip and the boys as she set the table for dinner. Cara had told her earlier that she wouldn’t be back in time to eat, but for her and the boys to go ahead. It felt odd working in another woman’s kitchen as Philip and the boys talked about horses, the Pony Express and the mama cat. She smiled at the way the boys responded to Philip. Caleb asked questions about the Pony Express and Mark talked about the mama cat and kittens.
She made sure to set a plate on the back of the stove for Cara and then called, “Time to eat, boys.”
Philip pushed up from the couch. “Come on, boys, I’ll show you where we men wash up.”
“Do we need our coats again?” Caleb asked.
“Nope, we won’t be outside. Cara talked John into making her a small pantry off the kitchen, where she made a place for him to wash up.” He was already walking past Bella and into the pantry.
Bella smiled as the sound of the boys’ laughter and chatter filled the small space.