Texas Dad

She pushed aside half of her sandwich, wondering why she’d recalled that or anything else about Mack. It had taken her a long time to bury her pain.

Paying at the register, J.J. walked back to her motel, determined to put Mack out of her mind for the night.

* * *

THE NEXT MORNING, just past 10:00 a.m., she hurried into the library. It smelled like all the libraries she’d spent time in during her school years in Texas. The odor of pungent wax didn’t quite hide the musty scent of old books.

The heels of her boots clacked on the weathered wood flooring. Rising late after sleeping better than she’d expected to, she’d hastily thrown on a citified version of cowgirl wear—skinny jeans, a sleeveless black linen blouse and understated gold accessories that were a staple when she traveled. Assuming she’d be driving to the ranch later, she’d pulled her hair in an easy twist that looked elaborate but really wasn’t. It kept her hair contained and out of her face when she shot photographs in remote locations. Slung over one shoulder she carried her ever-present worn leather bag filled with cameras, light meters and other equipment she never found time to unpack between trips.

“I’m supposed to meet a couple of teen girls,” she told the librarian. The woman pointed her to a round table partially hidden behind a counter on which sat two computers.

Crossing over to the waiting pair, J.J. smiled and said, “Sorry I’m a bit late. I’m J. J. Walker. I’m from Her Own Woman magazine.” She was surprised that she couldn’t readily identify which of them was Mack’s daughter, given that she’d known both of the girl’s parents. She’d forgotten Texas ranch kids tended to look younger and more scrubbed than teens she encountered on a New York subway.

For the girls’ part, they seemed struck mute.

Not wanting to intimidate them, J.J. slid out a chair, dumped her bag on the floor and sat. “Well, I don’t know who’s who, but you know why I’m here. It must be exciting to have your essay and photographs chosen by our staff,” she said brightly.

The girl with reddish brown braids sat up straighter. “I’m Zoey Bannerman. This is my friend, Brandy Evers. I took the pictures, and Brandy gave me suggestions for my essay.” She kept her gaze downcast, which didn’t allow J.J. to see if the girl’s eyes were gray like Mack’s.

Removing a folder and business card from her bag, J.J. said, “Our next step is for me to interview your father and take some professional photos. We want shots of him doing what he does every day on his ranch.” Her gold bangles clinked as she spun her watch around to check the time. “If we head out now, I should be able to wind things down by four o’clock.”

“Today?” The girls shared a look of consternation. Before J.J. could decipher it, the front door to the library flew open, creating a cool breeze. J.J. saw both girls stiffen as a man’s deep voice called, “Zoey.” Zoey jumped up and almost fell over the camera bag.

Leaning down, J.J. tucked the bag farther under the table, then let her eyes track over scuffed cowboy boots, up worn blue jeans, to a shiny belt buckle. Panic set in when she completed the journey and got stuck on the tanned, lean face of none other than Mackenzie Bannerman. Thankfully, he wasn’t paying any attention to her, and that gave her time to take a deep breath and pull herself together.

“You should’ve let me know you girls were coming into town, Zoey. I expected you to be at Brandy’s house. Erma fell down our back steps. She may have broken her hip. I had to bring her into the urgent-care clinic, and I wasted precious time tracking down Brandy’s mom, who didn’t hear her phone. Since I’m here, she asked if I’d drive you kids home. So grab your books and check them out. I have to swing back to the clinic to get the verdict on Erma.”

The girls remained glued to their spots, Zoey standing and Brandy seated across from J.J.

“What’s wrong with you two? Hop to it. Whether or not Erma broke her hip, she’s going to be laid up for a while. I need to stop by the employment office and see if they can scare us up a temporary housekeeper.” Only then did Mack seem to realize there was someone else at the girls’ table.

J.J. knew the exact moment he noticed her—and recognized her—because his breath escaped his lungs in a hiss. He reeled back on his heels and swore out loud.

“Mack,” she said, inclining her head ever so slightly to meet those incredible eyes. “It’s been a long time.” J.J. prided herself on the fact that her voice wasn’t shaking like her insides were.

Fury wafted off the man and surrounded them in oppressive waves. J.J. could barely breathe for the tension that crackled between them. But of the two of them, she’d at least managed to be civil. Perhaps Mack—the cheater—didn’t have it in him to do the same.

Chapter Two

Mack felt as if he’d gone back in time. He shut his eyes and opened them again slowly to see if he’d lost his mind. His heart was beating so fast that he wondered if he was about to suffer the same fate as his father—a stroke.

Nope, he wasn’t living a nightmare. There sat Jill Walker, looking more gorgeous than she had at twenty-one. Pulling himself together, Mack snarled at her out of renewed anger—how dared she waltz back into his life when she’d treated him so abominably? “Jilly,” he said icily. “What brings you to La Mesa? And why in hell are you with my daughter?”

Handing him a business card, Jill stared coolly at Mack. “I go by J.J. now...J. J. Walker. Believe me when I say I’m not here by choice. I’m on assignment. I assume you’re familiar with Her Own Woman magazine, since Zoey nominated you and you were selected to be our featured man of August.” She noticed then how the girls were frantically trying to signal her. She stopped talking, unsure what they were trying to convey.

“If that’s not total bullshit, I don’t know what is.” Mack crushed her card in his hand.

The girls swooped around him at the same time the librarian hurried over to shush them. “You four need to take your noisy discussion outside,” she ordered. “There are people here trying to concentrate.”

Giving J.J. another angry glance, Mack collected the girls’ books and bags, and hustled Zoey and Brandy out.

J.J. gathered her folder and camera bag, slower to follow. No matter how prepared she thought she’d be to see Mack, he was far more potent in person than in those photographs.

Mack and the girls stood at the base of the library steps when J.J. descended. He was waving his hands, and as she got closer she heard him demanding answers from Zoey. Huge tears rolled down the girl’s face while her friend stood to one side biting her lower lip. J.J. might not want to be here, but she felt sorry for Mack’s daughter.

“Girls.” She broke in. “I suspect you haven’t been up front with Zoey’s father regarding my magazine’s contest. The truth is we can’t feature anyone who objects. In fact, Zoey, the magazine mailed you a release you were instructed to have your dad sign.”

“I, uh, we... Brandy and me thought he could sign it later.”

“I’ve got no intention of signing anything,” Mack said, glaring down his nose at J.J. as he hooked his thumbs over his belt. “Release for what? What’s going on? I didn’t enter any contest.”

“Nothing,” Zoey wailed. “Everything’s ruined. I didn’t think you’d win, but if you did I planned to surprise you.”

“That you have succeeded in doing,” Mack said, drawing out a long sigh.

Brandy slid in next to Zoey. “Zoey did it for your steak-fry, Mr. B. Every winner gets a check from the magazine for his favorite charity.”

Zoey scrubbed her wet cheeks. “The magazine people choose a reader to bring the check. And they send you and the reader to a nice restaurant...kind of like a date. Oh,” she sobbed, “it’s hopeless. Now you’ll never go out with someone nice who can help me dress like a girl,” she cried. “Next year Heather Reed and all the boys will keep laughing at me.”

Mack stood in stunned silence a moment, unable to process the bulk of Zoey’s ramblings. She was more upset than he’d ever seen her, and her sadness cooled his anger the way nothing else could. He used his thumbs to wipe away her lingering tears. Kneeling, he pulled her close.

J.J. noticed how his demeanor changed and his face softened when he gently tugged one of Zoey’s braids.

“You look like a girl,” he murmured. “Who says you don’t? Help me understand, Bug. What check? What reader? Why do you think that girl laughs at you? And why does it matter if I date or not?”

“Don’t call me Bug. Boys are bugs. Brandy’s mom and dad call her honey.”

Slanting J.J. an embarrassed little smile before he cradled Zoey’s splotchy face in his big hands, Mack murmured, “I’ve called you Bug since you were born, because you were cute as a bug. If you don’t like it, I’ll stop. But the rest, especially the dating part, isn’t a subject to be discussed in public.”

Brandy interrupted again. “Mr. B., how come you know a magazine photographer from New York?”

He didn’t answer, still peeved as he switched his focus to J.J. “I swear this is the first I’ve heard of any of this. I have no idea what’s going on. I probably should have asked Zoey why she was stalking me with a camera a few weeks ago. But tell me how any reputable magazine can encourage children to invade a person’s life without obtaining that person’s permission?”

Beginning to steam at Mack’s holier-than-thou attitude, J.J. flipped her folder open and yanked out a blank sheet of paper. “Like I said, the rules state that candidates must sign a release. The girls followed the rules. Our staff found Zoey’s essay compelling, and the photos, well, intriguing. I was on a shoot out of the country when the decision was made to put you in the lineup. But no problem, Mackenzie, we can end this ASAP and I’ll be on my way home. All I need is for you to jot a brief note declining to be included in our promo.” She shoved the folder and pen toward him as he knelt in front of Zoey.

He reached up for the folder. Zoey looked stricken.

Gesturing with the pen, J.J. said, “By declining, you will forfeit the five-thousand-dollar donation to your charity. I imagine that’s the biggest shame, especially if you’re forced to cancel your steak-fry. I admit I was impressed by your charity.”

“Forced to...? I’m baffled as to why you’d think there’s some doubt about me underwriting our annual steak-fry.” His expression even more confused, Mack rose to frown first at J.J., then Zoey. “Zoey, please stop crying. I’ve left Erma in the E.R. and we need to go see about her.”

“Do you mean Erma Fairweather?” J.J. asked.

“Yes.”

“I’d love to see her. Oh, but she probably won’t remember me. I always liked Erma. I hope she’s okay.”

“You liked her, yet you had no trouble dropping out of her life and mine?”

J.J. flared at his unfair assessment, but rather than strike back in front of the girls, who were clearly hanging on everything passing between her and Mack, she bit back her comment.

Following another uncomfortable silence, punctuated by Zoey’s sniffling, Mack threw up a hand. “Enough! Let’s take a minute and get to the bottom of this. I hate seeing you so upset, Zoey.” He knew he’d never handled her tears well. And Jill Walker seemed far too anxious to be rid of him. The way she’d stomped on his heart before blithely abandoning Texas still rankled. Having her here felt like unfinished business to Mack and he disliked leaving things undone. Maybe he’d reconsider this stupid contest for no reason other than to annoy the hell out of Jill—or at least put himself in a position to finally extract a bit of revenge.

“Don’t everyone rush to explain,” he said. “How about I take a look at the entry the girls sent in?” Mack held out his hand to J.J.

Thrown off-kilter by his turbulent gray eyes, she leafed through her folder. As she did, she chanced a glimpse at Zoey. The pleading expression in the girl’s teary eyes left no doubt that Zoey didn’t want her dad reading the story she had concocted. Could it be that Mack wasn’t aware of how much his unhappy daughter wanted a mother? J.J. recalled incidents from her own childhood, things her mother later claimed she’d done for the sake of giving J.J. a normal life. When the truth came out, J.J. had been resentful. Despite that, she wasn’t here to offer the Bannermans advice or otherwise interfere in their lives. She wasn’t a psychologist. But...Zoey looked so miserable, the very least J.J. could do was avoid causing added anxiety.

“I have the photos, but apparently not the essay,” she fibbed, carefully extracting the four-by-six photos taped to a blank page. She passed it to Mack, and watched both kids sigh in relief.

Mack studied the top two prints dispassionately. He cringed when he got to the one at the bottom—the one Zoey had taken of him in the bathroom.

J.J. noticed a crimson blush rising up his neck and staining his tanned cheeks. He tugged on one ear, and she recognized it as an old habit of his, especially prevalent whenever he felt uncomfortable. She used to consider it an endearing trait in a guy who was tough in other ways. Her veneer of disinterest started to crack. Perhaps Mack wasn’t so changed from the man she’d once known and loved, after all.

His color still high, Mack handed back the photos. “I can’t pretend to have a clue why Zoey pulled this little stunt. I’m a rancher, not a male model, for God’s sake. Zoey, you said you planned to take photography in junior high next year. If that’s true, I can’t imagine your teacher approving of a student doing this.” He stabbed a finger at the pictures J.J. was busily tucking away.

Brandy was the one to answer. “The fact that Zoey’s photographs were good enough for New York magazine people will impress teachers, Mr. B.” She grinned while Zoey only looked more uncomfortable.

J.J. was beginning to find the whole thing amusing, since Mack didn’t see himself as hot the way Her Own Woman’s staff did.

J.J. didn’t like the contest, either, but for now she would keep the girls’ secret, mostly because she liked seeing Mack stew over his decision. Clearly he loved Zoey and didn’t want to disappoint her. How could J.J. not give the guy points for that?

Mack checked his watch. Again he frowned in obvious frustration. “Bug, uh, Zoey, I wish you kids had talked to me before you did any of this. But if you entered me hoping to earn money for my charity, I guess your hearts were in the right place.”

Zoey hunched into her shirt collar. “I’m sorry. We didn’t think you’d totally hate it if you won. I thought it was cool that the magazine picks a reader to bring your check. I thought you’d like a nice woman to go out to dinner with.”

“But why not enter some young guy like Trevor?” Mack asked, referring to the younger of his ranch hands.

“I heard Mom’s cooking club talking about the contest,” Brandy admitted. “You sponsor the charity, Mr. B., so you’re the one who needs to be in the magazine. Last year our class collected stuff like toothpaste and deodorant to send to soldiers. The teachers talked about how you give money to build homes for hurt veterans, so Zoey and me wanted to help get you more money.”

J.J. saw Brandy dig her elbow in Zoey’s side, which prompted that girl to nod vigorously. “Yeah,” she agreed, her big hazel eyes still glossy with tears.

J.J. rolled her own eyes as she listened, sure Mack was being manipulated. The girls were cute as could be, but what a pair. She saw Mack begin to cave and wondered if the kids knew to quit digging themselves a deeper hole when they might be winning.

“Hmm. So, it’s only a one-time story in your magazine, right?” Mack’s eyes bored into J.J.

She could lay out his daughter’s real reason for sending the essay and scare him off, or she could give the girls a break. She’d probably come to regret this later, but she elected to play along for Zoey’s sake. “One time, yes. Each monthly winner gets a four-page spread in the center of the magazine. Yours is slated for our August issue, with a follow-up on the check presentation the next month. I can give you our web address if you’d like to see the other men we’ve worked with. Basically I interview you and write an article about your life, your work and your charity. We’ll include photos of you on a horse and with your cattle, like the pictures Zoey provided, but professional.” She shrugged, figuring he’d bolt for sure if she said readers specifically liked beefcake.

“Well, about the photos Zoey took...” He scowled. “Just so it’s clear...I don’t usually work around the ranch without my shirt on.”

“So, are you gonna do it, Daddy?” Zoey asked, hope creeping into her voice.

Mack was still teetering. He didn’t want Jill Walker here. He certainly didn’t want her poking in his life. He didn’t want her following him around the ranch. But, dammit, neither did he want her to go before he had a chance to ask why she’d dumped him so unceremoniously when he thought they’d settled on a life together. Not that it mattered after all these years. Common sense said Jill wouldn’t be straight with him, anyway. But his common sense fled as he faced her. She still had the power to ignite ripples of desire no other woman had sparked in more years than he could count.

“All right,” he said with a sigh. “I’ll agree because the girls already did what they did, and because your magazine shelled out some bucks to send you here. So I’ll go along with it, Jilly—uh, J.J.”

Zoey and Brandy discreetly bumped elbows, a move so practiced that J.J. guessed it held special meaning for the friends.

J.J. separated another page from her folder. “First things first. Sign and date this release giving me permission to proceed. I’ll scoot on out to the ranch for a few tests with my light meter while you check on Erma. This shouldn’t take more than a few hours to wind up.”

Nodding, Mack ran a thumb over his lips before he took the pen she held out to him. He scribbled his name where J.J. indicated. As he jotted today’s date he was starkly reminded of how many years had passed since this beautiful woman had hurt him so badly. He needed to keep his distance and be vigilant about not letting her hurt him again. Him or Zoey. Mack recognized hero worship in both girls’ eyes, and he was already regretting his decision.

“Shouldn’t Ms. J.J. ride with us so she can find our place?” Zoey asked, sunny again.

“My rental car has a GPS system, Zoey. I left it at the motel, but I’ll be fine on my own,” J.J. said.

Mack’s cell rang and he excused himself, turning his back as he took the call. They all saw him massage his neck and heard his tense voice, so their chatter ceased. J.J. was afraid it was bad news about Erma. Instead, he exclaimed, “Trudy, this is a surprise....Uh, Erma’s still in the E.R. How did you hear about her accident so quickly?...It’s kind of you to, uh, want to rush to the ranch to help out....Really, there’s no need. Thanks, though....Hey, sorry to cut you off, but I’m heading to the clinic for a verdict on Erma.” He closed his phone, straightened and turned in time to see Zoey and Brandy making ugly faces.

“Girls! That’s rude. Erma might have a few things to say about Ms. Thorne, but she has a good heart and was just being neighborly.”

J.J. alone caught the mock gags the girls exchanged, because Mack had dug out his keys, dropped them and had leaned down to retrieve them. On rising, he motioned the girls toward a big, black, extended cab pickup. J.J. had already guessed it belonged to him based on the chrome cowcatcher bolted to the front bumper.

Zoey stopped, looked back and waved shyly. “See you, Ms. J.J. I like your boots a lot,” she added. “I hope you don’t mess them up tramping around our ranch. We have a lot of dirt.”

J.J. smiled. “Please, girls, call me J.J. without the ‘Ms.’” She cast a glance at Mack and interrupted him in the act of checking her out from head to toe. She felt her cheeks grow hot. Her boots were fashionable, with high heels, but they were black leather and should wipe free of dust easily. “I can wait and photograph you with your cattle tomorrow. I brought sneakers and a sturdier pair of boots for navigating around cow patties,” she said, flashing him an exaggerated smile.

* * *

CAREFUL TO CONCEAL his real thoughts, Mack hoped his face didn’t show the admiration he felt for how fantastic she looked. So good, in fact, his heart skipped several beats. Jill had always had a knack for enhancing her natural beauty. Once, she’d been his life. His love. For a year or so she’d been a favorite around the ranch. His dad, Erma and Benny all loved her. Then, poof, she’d up and run off, leaving him to grieve the loss of his father and her at the same time. Standing near her now, watching how the sunlight made a halo around her honey-gold hair, it was easy to forget how cruelly she’d walked away from everything they’d pledged each other. His question remained—why? Again the answer punched him in his gut—to further her career. Hadn’t her mother admitted as much to him? Mack hated that even now her smile turned him inside out.

Zoey called for him to unlock the pickup. That brought Mack crashing back to the present. Stepping aside, he said curtly, “There’s something we need to get straight, Jill. Take your photos and ask me any questions you have. Don’t bother Erma if she comes home, and don’t involve Benny Lopez. And stay away from Zoey.”

Spinning on worn boot heels, Mack strode to his vehicle and jumped in. In his haste to leave the woman who shaded her stunning blue eyes as she watched his departure, Mack flooded the engine.

Zoey and Brandy had climbed into the backseat of the king cab but had yet to buckle in when Mack reversed sharply out of his parking space. His jerky move knocked the girls together.

“Slow down, Dad! You didn’t give us time to fasten our seat belts.”

“Sorry.” Mack braked and studied the girls in his rearview mirror. “I told Erma I’d collect you from the library and come straight back to the E.R. I certainly didn’t expect to be confronted by...” Cutting off his admission, he again took off too fast.

Brandy leaned forward. “So, Mr. B., you didn’t get around to telling us how you know J.J.”

“Yeah, Dad, it’s weird, but cool, too.”

“It’s a small world, girls. Jill, that is, Ms. Walker and I went to the same college a long time ago. Most kids who graduated from La Mesa High went to Lubbock. And Jill grew up in Lubbock.” He wouldn’t call their recent encounter cool. He’d call it a punch-to-the-gut shock.

“Oh,” Brandy murmured, sliding back in her seat. “My folks met in college, too, and fell in love. They lived in Utah.”

“Here’s the clinic.” Mack jockeyed his pickup into an open slot between two subcompacts. “I’ll go see what’s up with Erma. You two stay put. And don’t open the doors or you’ll set off the alarm.” Mack removed the keys, slid out and hit the automatic lock on his key chain. He hauled in a gulp of fresh air, glad to take a break from the kids’ interest in him and Jill. Of all the photographers in the world, it was more than weird, as Zoey had said, that Jilly was the one sent from New York to handle a stupid contest his daughter shouldn’t have entered in the first place.

As he stepped into the clinic, Mack curled a hand around the back of his neck to soothe the throbbing headache that had begun at the library. Stopping at the reception desk, he said, “I brought Erma Fairweather here. Is she ready?”

“Ms. Fairweather is still in X-ray. She should be finished shortly. We’ve been swamped today—we’re blaming last night’s full moon,” the woman said with a twinkle in her eyes. “E.R. visits double when the moon is full.”

“I’ve heard that about the full moon,” Mack said. “More cows drop calves then, too. I’ll be over there if you need me for anything,” he said, pointing to an empty chair by the window. “I left my daughter and her friend in my pickup, so I want to keep an eye on them.”

“Help yourself to coffee,” she said, stabbing a finger toward an alcove where Mack saw an industrial-size pot. Coffee sounded good. He went over and poured a cup. He’d always drunk his coffee black. Oddly, he remembered Jilly laced hers with so much sugar and cream it couldn’t even legitimately be called coffee. A stupid thing to dredge up. But he wondered if that habit of hers or other quirks he recalled had changed.