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This must be the family Lane had gone to visit. Wade rolled his head back and forth. Even if he had any interest in marriage, the last thing he needed was a young woman barely old enough to leave her parents. Besides, Lane had his sights set on the young lady and Wade had no intention of being competition. “Marriage isn’t for everyone. And to provide for a family, a man needs a home. I have none. I’m a cowboy.”
“Look around the table,” Eddie said. “These fellows were homeless cowboys, too, until they found a reason to settle down.”
The conversation was thankfully dropped as people turned their attention to the bountiful food. Wade savored every mouthful even though the meal carried sorrowful memories of similar occasions spent with Susan and her family. But as Missy had said to Annie, his sister would want him to enjoy the day.
Beneath the rumble of a discussion about the new church, Missy murmured, “One would think two orphaned children would be enough reason to settle down.”
So much for thinking the topic had been abandoned.
Wade’s enjoyment of the meal turned sour.
Linette lowered her fork to the table. “Tell me, Wade, what are your plans for the children?”
He, too, lowered his fork, knowing his answer would bring more criticism from Missy. Not that it was any of her business. “Ma’am, I’ve been in contact with a Mr. and Mrs. Bauer from Fort Macleod regarding adoption.”
A collective gasp came from others at the table.
“I had hoped to hear from them by now because I have to leave almost immediately. I’ve agreed to look after a friend’s ranch while he takes a trip.”
A beat of silence passed before anyone responded.
It was Missy who spoke. “I guess you’ll have to take the children with you.” Obviously she knew that wasn’t his plan, but she meant to force him to reconsider.
“That’s not possible. I can’t take care of them and the ranch, too.” Before Missy could voice any more disapproval, before any of them could, he spoke again. “I need someplace safe to leave them until the couple comes. I hope...hoped they could stay here.”
Linette and Eddie looked at each other for a moment. Eddie answered Wade’s request. “We’ll discuss it later.”
With those words, he had to be content, though he could not relax with Missy’s heavy disapproval coming off her like a wave.
The main part of the meal ended, the dishes were cleared away and mincemeat pie served. Wade hoped the children were enjoying the dessert more than he was. Every mouthful was full of regret from his own heart and silent accusations from Missy.
Finally the meal was over.
“Everyone return to the sitting room. There are gifts for all the children,” Linette said.
Wade had begun to rise, but at that he sank back in his chair. He must find a way to draw Joey and Annie away so they wouldn’t be disappointed when they received no gifts.
Linette waved a hand to indicate he should join them. “There’s something for Annie and Joey, too.”
Missy waited at her chair as if to make certain he didn’t skip out.
He had no such intention and rose to follow her back to the other room. In a flash he saw that everyone had resumed their previous positions, which left him sitting at Missy’s side. He would have avoided the seat, but the room was crowded and he had no other option.
The children raced in and sat in a circle before the decorated evergreen tree next to the window.
One by one, Eddie handed gifts to the young ones. When it was his turn, Joey opened his package. “A ball for playing catch. Papa taught me to throw and catch.” He gazed at it, his lips quivering.
Wade would have gone to him, but wondered if the boy would find it embarrassing to be needing comfort.
Annie opened her gift, a sock doll with black button eyes, brown yarn hair and a pink cotton dress.
She stared at it and burst into tears.
Wade sat motionless, his heart shredding with shared sorrow. Before he could move, Missy sprang forward, sat beside the child and pulled her to her lap. “Shh, shh.” She rocked Annie in a tight embrace.
Finally the tears stopped. Missy returned to her chair, with Annie clinging to her like a sweater.
“I’ll take her.” Wade reached for his niece, but Missy shook her head.
“She’s fine here on my lap.” Missy’s eyes, too, were awash with tears.
Wade closed his eyes against a rush of wild emotions—a burning desire to comfort them both, a burst of fresh pain at his own sorrow and beneath it all, his unending sense of failure in not being able to give these children what they needed. And in not having seen how sad and desperate his late wife had been. The accusations hurled at him by Tomasina’s parents that it was his duty to see to her needs were no stronger than those from his own heart.
He never again wanted to experience such failure.
* * *
Missy held Annie as tightly as Annie held her. How well she remembered the first Christmas after her parents had died. The aching feeling that nothing would ever be the same, that no one would ever understand and love her the way Mama and Papa had. She and Gordie had gotten presents for each other—she’d bought him a new pocketknife she’d seen him admire in the store and he’d bought her a set of ivory hair combs. She hadn’t noticed them in any of the stores and wondered where he’d gotten them. It was much later that she realized he’d probably stolen them, and she’d never again used them.
She shook off the memories and flicked her gaze to the man beside her. She noted that his hands were curled so tightly the knuckles were white. From under her lashes Missy studied him. His expression revealed a mixture of emotions—uncertainty and sorrow.
He’d lost his sister. Of course he felt sorrow.
In her judgment of him she’d forgotten to take that into account. At the first opportunity she would correct the matter.
Annie cuddled close as the other children played with their new toys. After a bit, Joey left the others and scooted over to sit with his back against Wade’s legs. Wade rested his hands on the boy’s shoulders.
Missy smiled as uncle and nephew released tiny sighs and sank toward each other, giving comfort and consolation.
One by one the guests rose, gathered up their children and bade Linette and Eddie and the others goodbye. Louise and Nate excused themselves and took baby Chloe to their room. Only Missy remained beside Wade, with Annie on her lap and Joey at Wade’s knees.
Eddie and Linette approached Wade. “We need to talk.”
Knowing they meant to address Wade’s request to leave the children at the ranch, Missy struggled to her feet. “I’ll take the children into the kitchen. Come along, Joey.”
The child was too tired to argue and shuffled after her, but by the time they sat down at the table, his curiosity kicked in.
“They’re talking about us, aren’t they? Is Uncle Wade leaving us here?” The boy’s voice cracked, not only from fatigue. The poor child dreaded being abandoned.
Annie sobbed and tightened her arms about Missy’s neck.
She forced herself to take two slow breaths. How could Wade think of leaving these children? Yes, she understood he had a job to go to, that someone was counting on him to take care of their ranch. Yes, she understood he was an unmarried cowboy with no home. But the facts did not change her feelings. She knew what it was like to have people she cared about snatched out of her life, and to feel as if she was only an inconvenience to those who were left. She even harbored a suspicion that Louise had married her brother, Gordie, simply to protect Missy from Vic. The thought twisted through her gut. A nuisance and a burden.
Praying her voice would be firm and reassuring, she pulled Joey to her side. “Listen to me, both of you. Wherever you go, whatever happens to you, you are not alone. You have each other. And you have your mama and papa inside you.” She didn’t know how else to say that their memories of their parents would always be with them and always guide them. “And God is with you. He will never leave you nor forsake you. He is as close as your next breath. He sees what you need and He will provide it.”
Two pairs of dark eyes watched her, practically drank her in, taking the encouragement and assurance she offered.
“You can trust God no matter what. Can you remember that?”
Annie and Joey nodded.
The kitchen door swung wide. Wade stood in the opening, his eyes on her. “Missy, would you please join us?” He turned to the children. “You two wait here.”
Missy set Annie on a chair next to her brother, caressed both heads and smiled. “Remember what I told you.” She reminded herself of the same thing—God was with her—and followed Wade into the sitting room.
She felt the heaviness in the air around her as she sat down opposite Wade.
“What’s this all about?” she asked.
Linette answered. “You heard Wade say he was trying to find an adoptive family for the children.”
Missy nodded, her lips pressed together to keep her opinion to herself.
“We’ve asked him to stay until he makes those arrangements. For the children’s sake.”
“Quite so. They’ve had enough loss to deal with already.” Missy released the words in a rush and blinked hard to keep from piercing Wade with her challenging look.
Linette continued. “However, he doesn’t feel he can take care of them on his own.”
Eddie spoke at that point. “I won’t let Linette be responsible for them. Not when Jonathan is only a few days old.” The baby boy slept in her arms.
Wade cleared his throat and Missy’s gaze jerked toward him. So many feelings rushed through her—fear that he meant to give these children away, hope that it would give them a loving home and... Oh, yes, she meant to express her sympathy at his loss. Before she could say a word, he spoke.
“I would like to hire you to look after Annie and Joey until I can make other arrangements.”
She opened her mouth, but again he cut her off. “You can put the money toward paying for the secretarial course you want to take.”
She’d meant to say she’d gladly take care of the children free of charge, but his words reminded her that she needed funds to fulfill her plans. Still she did not answer him. Somehow to say yes felt as if she’d be giving approval to his plan, aligning herself with him rather than the children.
But if she said yes, she could spend time with them, help prepare them for their future and help them find enjoyment in their current situation.
“Yes, I’ll do it. On one condition.” She hesitated. Was she asking the right thing? “You—” she nodded to Wade “—spend time with them, as well.”
Their gazes held as they measured each other. Likely he wondered at her reason even as she wondered at his.
“I’m amenable to that.”
Eddie slapped his knees. “Then it’s settled. Things have a way of working out for the good of everyone.”
Missy wondered what he meant. She couldn’t see how things would work out for the good for Joey and Annie. They’d lost their parents and would soon lose their uncle and go to live with strangers.
None of them had any control over the future. But as she’d told the children, God would never leave them. If she could do one thing in the few days she’d have with them, it would be to make sure they believed that.
In so doing, she’d make certain they enjoyed their time at Eden Valley Ranch—even if it meant she’d have to interact with Wade Snyder to make that happen.
Chapter Two (#ulink_8b5e3e8d-dc65-5be5-89c4-e11c1d6c430c)
Eddie got to his feet, took the baby and helped Linette to stand. “I think my wife should have a little rest. It’s been a long day.” He led her up the stairs.
Missy watched them go, then glanced about the room. Not long ago this space had been crowded with guests. Now there was only Wade and her. Not that they were really alone. The children were in the next room; Linette and Eddie, Nate and Louise were upstairs. Nevertheless, Missy’s nerves twanged with tension. Would Wade use the quiet to inform her that she had stepped into his business too many times? She knew she had but didn’t regret it.
There was only one thing she meant to change. “I have never expressed my condolences over the loss of your sister and brother-in-law. I’m very sorry. I recently lost my brother, so I share a little knowledge of how you feel.”
“Thank you. I didn’t know you’d lost your brother, though I suppose I should have realized it when Louise said her husband had never met baby Chloe. I didn’t make the connection. I’m sorry for your loss, as well.”
Missy let her gaze find his as she offered her sympathy. It was nothing but a cool, impersonal meeting of the eyes, but at his kind words, something shifted between them. Their circumstances might be different, but the pain and loss were similar and they silently acknowledged it. She felt his sorrow in the depth of her heart, even as her own sense of loss tightened her chest.
Her breath stuttered in and she broke their visual connection. “Do you intend to tell the children of your plans?” she asked, bringing her gaze back to his.
He looked away, his eyes full of uncertainty. “I don’t know how much I should tell them.” He turned back to her. “I don’t want to take away from their enjoyment of Christmas.”
She nodded. “Nor do I. In fact, I’ll do everything in my power to make their stay here enjoyable. Too bad Christmas is over.” In the ensuing silence, she heard a distressing sound. “Is that Annie crying?”
They were both on their feet in an instant and rushed for the kitchen door.
Joey sat with his arm about his little sister. Her sock doll lay on her knees as tears dripped to its face.
Missy knelt before the child. “Honey, what’s wrong?”
Annie sobbed an answer.
Missy could not make out what she said and was about to sit down and pull the child to her lap when Wade beat her to it. He held Annie so tenderly, his face so full of sorrow and concern, that Missy blinked back a few tears of her own. How she wished to help this hurting trio. God, I told the children You would help them and guide them. Let me assist if that’s possible.
She sat beside Wade and rubbed Annie’s back. After a moment the little girl quieted and was able to speak. “Mama made me a doll. I don’t know where it is.” Her crying intensified again.
Missy’s heart twisted and she gave Wade a look of despair. “She’s lost so much.”
“She hasn’t lost her doll.” He shifted Annie to Missy’s arms and strode from the room.
“Where’s he going?” Joey clutched her hand. “Is he leaving?”
“I don’t think so.” Missy was as uncertain as Joey until she reminded herself that Wade had agreed to stay until the children were placed.
He returned in quick order carrying two bulky boxes and two valises. “Your doll is in this stuff. We just have to find it.” He dropped his burdens to the floor.
The children sprang forward and fell upon the baggage as if they’d been returned home from being lost. In a sense, Missy supposed it felt that way. Everything they owned and were familiar with was before them.
Wade pried open the first box and let the children dive into the contents. Blankets, clothing, a pair of woolen mittens were all pulled out. Annie pressed her face into each article and breathed deeply. Joey fingered the fabric and then slipped his hands into the mittens, a look of joy and pain twisting his features.
They emptied the box and sat back. No doll.
Missy carefully repacked the contents while Wade opened the next box. Again he stepped back as the children examined the contents. With a squeal, Annie pulled out a pink sweater and slipped it on. She rubbed her sleeves and smiled through a sheen of tears. “My sweater Mama made me.”
Joey dug further. He didn’t say anything, but it was obvious he was hunting for something. When the box was empty he sat back on his heels. “It’s not there.”
“What are you looking for?” Wade asked.
“Something.” Joey would say no more.
