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About That Night
About That Night
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About That Night

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About That Night

‘Oh, you know, he’d get stressed and angry and take it out on the researchers. He reduced a couple of them to tears. Nothing was good enough. He’d find fault with the guest bookings, the scripts, the props. In a way, it came from the right place – his ambition for the show – but it got to the stage where he was never going to be satisfied unless we booked Barack Obama and preferably got him to sing a duet on the show. He’d lost perspective somehow. He couldn’t understand why he was having to work with reality show contestants instead of the leader of the free world.’

‘Did he reduce you to tears?’ The DI looked at the pad on her desk and Elizabeth realised she’d made quite a few jottings.

‘Not in his presence,’ Elizabeth said truthfully. ‘But I must admit, I’ve had quite a few nights where I’ve been awake at 3 a.m., eating Marks & Spencer custard.’ She looked at the policewoman’s lean, netball-toned figure and doubted that Karen Watson had any nights when she succumbed to a tub of crème anglaise. But the detective looked up and half a smile played across her lips. Her eyes were lively and bright.

‘And who’s your boss?’

‘Matthew Grayling, the Controller. The man you met last night.’

The DI’s smile vanished. ‘Ah yes, the man with the limp. So he runs the whole network? He’s in charge of all the programmes?’

‘Yes. He’s been there fifteen years. He knows Ricky of old. He got him to do Saturday Bonkers in the first place. He recently gave him the chat show to try and ease him into a new slot – you know, it’s not on Saturday nights, it’s not live, so we can always go into the edit and cut out the worst bits.’

‘And was Matthew in the studio all evening?’

‘No, I rang him, once Ricky… once he’d collapsed.’ Elizabeth felt suddenly tearful. She bent her head and DI Watson sat silently for a moment before saying more gently, ‘And now you’ve had time to think about that night, time to think over everything that happened, you can’t think of anything that was unusual? Nothing about Ricky Clough that struck you as strange or different? He didn’t seem ill?’

‘No.’ Elizabeth reached for a tissue from the box on DI Watson’s desk. ‘If anything, the thing that was unusual was that he was actually in a good mood. He seemed upbeat. I thought we were in for a good show. He didn’t seem in any discomfort, wasn’t complaining.’

‘And you’d actually started recording the show, I think, when he fell ill?’

‘Yes, that’s right. We’d done the introduction and we were about to do Paolo Culone.’

The DI look across at the sergeant. ‘We’re seeing all the guests from the show later, is that right?’ Ali Rafik nodded and listed the names of a few minor celebrities. Elizabeth winced at the poor quality of the bookings, but the DI appeared to register nothing. Eventually, she said, ‘I don’t watch much television. There never seems to be anything on that I want to watch.’ Elizabeth nodded. It was true. There was a criminal lack of coverage of women’s netball in primetime.

‘So tell me about the chef – Paolo Culone?’

‘Well, he’s young, very brash. He’s just opened his third London restaurant and it’s all about smell. He puts a different scent around the restaurant entrance because he says it influences your mood and he wants his guests to be happy when they come in. So the week it opened, he made sure it smelled like an old-fashioned sweet shop – sugary and lemony – so that people coming in would feel nostalgic for their childhoods.’ Elizabeth took a deep breath. She’d been to Culone’s new restaurant a few weeks back. She’d gone there with Hutch and it had smelled of Curly Wurlys. Later that night in bed, Hutch had said she smelled deliciously of caramel and he’d licked her agonisingly slowly, all over.

The sergeant made a sound that was half cough, half giggle. Elizabeth recovered herself and nodded at him. ‘Ricky thought it was all bollocks, too. He wanted to take the piss out of Paolo. We were going to bring on some of his restaurant dishes hidden in boxes and get Culone to guess what they were by their smell.’

The DI wrinkled her nose and frowned, as if trying to understand how such an idea might constitute primetime entertainment. ‘And so it’s likely Ricky Clough might have eaten something before or during the show?’

‘Yes. We had some of Culone’s food in the Green Room, where we entertain guests before the show. Ricky went in to say hello. I think he was trying to put Paolo at ease. To praise his food and sort of lull him into a false sense of comfort.’ Elizabeth shrugged apologetically as if to distance herself from the sheer cynicism of the move, although it had actually been her idea.

‘And so others might’ve eaten the food, in the Green Room?’

‘I’m not sure. I wouldn’t be surprised if some of the team had some. We don’t pay our junior researchers much. They mostly live off scraps.’ Elizabeth pulled a face at Sergeant Rafik and was delighted to see him try to hide a smile. DI Watson’s expression was stony.

‘We’re running tests on all the food that’s been left over. We’ll have to interview everyone on your team as well.’

‘Really?’ Elizabeth sat up straight. ‘Is that honestly necessary?’

The DI put down her pen. ‘Yes, it is. But they don’t need to come in here. We’ll come to your offices this afternoon and talk to them individually.’

‘Well, I guess you’ll have to talk to Matthew about that…’ Elizabeth realised her boss’s attempts to keep the network out of this were hopelessly optimistic. ‘I guess he may want someone from Legal there.’ She looked at the DI anxiously. ‘Can I ask, do you know the results of Ricky’s hospital tests?’

The sergeant cleared his throat. The DI looked down at her pad, as if considering something, and then looked up at Elizabeth. ‘Not all of the results, no. But we’ve got reasonable cause for concern at this stage.’

Elizabeth felt sick. The colour drained from her face. ‘Concern about what?’

‘It would seem from all the tests so far that Ricky Clough did not die of natural causes. In fact, it appears that his seizure was the result of a highly toxic substance in his bloodstream.’

Elizabeth gripped the arms of her chair, her knuckles whitening.

DI Watson leaned back in her chair. ‘I’m afraid, Elizabeth, we have very good reason to believe that Ricky Clough was poisoned.’

Chapter Five

When Elizabeth staggered out of the police station an hour later, the smoky purple sky was threatening rain. DI Watson had let her go after some very detailed questioning about the studio schedule and routine. She’d asked Elizabeth to produce an exhaustive list of all the people present, from the camera crews, the sound guys, the lighting team, to all the production staff – anyone who might have had direct access to Ricky Clough. Elizabeth supplied it all, her mind whirring with obscene possibilities: could it have been the cameraman who’d been shouted at by Ricky once too often? Was it the make-up girl who used to service Ricky on her knees in his dressing room? Was it a prank gone wrong from the sound guys, who every week had to clear the wax out of his earpiece? Who on earth would do such a thing, to Ricky Clough, the king of entertainment?

She walked slowly towards Café Cecile, her usual meeting place for lunch with Hutch. They’d been seeing each other for nine months now, but still in secrecy. Hutch was beginning to get increasing recognition on the street; his football show was becoming very popular. He was now getting invited to every celebrity party, gallery opening and first night. He was witty, he was tall, he wore mostly black, he suited a baseball cap, he stayed late and drank a lot – he’d won his place on the A-list. He also went to most of these events alone, which made him popular with every hostess, because although it was well-known that he was married – to a sports PR girl he’d met when he still lived in Manchester – her own work commitments seemed to entail her spending most weekdays up north.

Elizabeth was wearying of the subterfuge. She’d initially gone along with the secrecy, had even found it exciting: slipping into his flat through the car park’s side door, leaving restaurants minutes apart, walking in opposite directions. Only her sister Vic knew about the affair – she hadn’t even told Lola. She’d been swept up in the giddiness of being adored – it had been a great solace after the break-up with Jamie. Hutch seemed fascinated by her, it was very gratifying: she felt clever and self-confident in his company. He was interested in her job, asked lots of questions, watched all her shows, minutely observing. He’d told her from the beginning that his marriage was over, they were living separate lives – he was simply waiting for the right moment. But here they were, nine months later, apparently still waiting for his right moment, and in the last few weeks Elizabeth had begun to believe that his right moment might never come. She was fed up with hiding in the shadows. She wanted a relationship that could be public, open, lasting. She wanted to be loved, enough.

That was what Jamie had said inside Marylebone Town Hall a year ago: I don’t love you, enough.


He had been waiting for her as she came through the town hall doors, standing alone and apart, unfamiliar in his grey suit, his shaggy blond hair newly washed and combed. He looked very pale and grave. Elizabeth held out her arms to show off her ridiculous apricot dress and did an apologetic mock pirouette. But Jamie didn’t smile. Instead, he grabbed her hand and pulled her with him out of the nearest door and into a municipal corridor. Portraits of former councillors, all of them men, gazed sternly down at them with their heavy chains of office.

‘Jamie… I… I’m sorry.’ Elizabeth’s heart was pounding against her ribs.

Jamie looked at her, surprised. ‘You’re sorry? What…? Oh, for being late? It doesn’t matter.’ He now looked at his feet and she noticed he had new shiny shoes. ‘Elizabeth, I…’

She suddenly felt she couldn’t breathe. She leaned against the wall. He must know! Perhaps dishonesty was like a scent; it lingered around your ears, on your neck, so that when he kissed her, he could smell her treachery? Surely, now, she had to say something? What if Vic was wrong? Perhaps it would be better to confess.

‘Elizabeth, I’m so sorry.’ His voice was quiet, almost a whisper. Unconsciously, she leaned in to hear him. ‘I don’t think I can do this. I don’t think we should do this.’ His breath came in gasps. ‘I don’t want to marry you. I’m so, so, sorry. I… I don’t think I love you. Enough.’

Elizabeth reeled back as if struck and her knees buckled; she slid slowly down the wall to the floor, still clutching the stems of her disintegrating bouquet. Enough? What did ‘enough’ mean? Jamie knelt beside her.

‘Lizzie, listen to me. I know you hate me right now. But I think, once you’ve had time, you’ll realise I’m right… We’re just doing this because the alternative seems so scary. But it’s not the right thing to do, Lizzie. We don’t love each other enough, we’ve just got used to each other. And that’s not the same thing.’

Elizabeth’s head sank to her knees. Suddenly, she felt very tired. She realised she hadn’t eaten anything. She wanted to curl up in a ball on the municipal floor and make everything disappear. But Jamie was still talking, low and urgently, in her ear. She couldn’t make it stop; this torrent of words from him, they kept on coming.

‘I know this is all my fault. I know I suggested we got married. I thought we needed to change something and that marrying would do it. But I’ve been very unhappy for a long time, Lizzie. You’ve been too busy to notice it. We’ve stopped talking. But I’ve been feeling very lonely and confused. And stupidly, I thought we’d sort things out by getting married and having kids. But as the days went by, I realised it was just a sticking plaster. And that isn’t right – that’s not what marriage should be. I kept thinking I’d say something these last few weeks, but I wasn’t brave enough, I suppose. But I can’t do it. I can’t go through with it. I’m still unhappy. I’m sorry. I’m very sorry.’

Elizabeth struggled to get to her feet and Jamie tried to help her, but she pushed him away angrily. Vic came running, with her husband Mark close behind her, and as they got to her, Elizabeth was feverishly shredding the flowers, a carnage of dismembered blue and yellow petals scattered around her like confetti. Vic lifted her by the arms and it was as if she was drunk, she couldn’t stand. Her mother appeared, crying, arms outstretched as if to catch her. Then Vic and her mum were steering her back down the town hall steps, her feet tripping crazily against each other. Mark was yelling for a taxi, and Elizabeth looked around, bewildered, for Jamie. But he was nowhere to be seen.


Elizabeth pulled her coat around her, feeling shivery. She had dawdled too long – she was late for Hutch. Café Cecile, at the wrong end of Ladbroke Grove, was a faded patisserie which served tired croque monsieur and stale pastries. Madame Cecile herself had also seen better days and she was more often than not to be found sitting on the back step of the kitchen, puffing on a cigarette and rubbing her swollen ankles. But she stocked a reasonable cache of very drinkable wine and being still mostly French, she allowed Hutch to smoke the odd Gauloise inside, at the table nearest the back door. But the main attraction of Café Cecile was that no one Elizabeth and Hutch knew would ever dream of going there. In the early, heady, getting-to-know-you days, she took to wearing a French beret and once presented Hutch with a copy of James Fenton’s ‘In Paris with You’:

Do you mind if we do not go to the Louvre,

If we say sod off to sodding Notre Dame,

If we skip the Champs Elysées,

And remain here in this sleazy

Old hotel room,

Doing this and that

To what and whom,

Learning who you are,

Learning what I am.

Their relationship had blossomed, along with Elizabeth’s astonishment that Hutch knew not a single poem, not even a limerick, resulting in her consequent determination to introduce him to the Romantics. And so his poetic education had progressed in tune with their affair, so that in time he became used to having not only Elizabeth in his bed, but also Keats, Byron and the Liverpudlians. Hutch liked her reading aloud to him and she liked to show off, and so they’d idle away hours over the poetry, the wine, and each other. It was almost as good as a dirty weekend in a backstreet hotel in Le Marais, a weekend they often talked dreamily about, but which had so far failed to materialise. Café Cecile would have to do.

By the time she arrived, Hutch was sitting at their usual table, an empty glass of red wine beside a plate of crumbs and a half-drunk bottle. She looked at him through the glass and the raindrops that separated them. His blue eyes were narrowed against the light, but they didn’t move from her face. His face seemed fuller; Elizabeth noticed his neck was creasing into the collar of his shirt. He’d had a haircut – it was clipped close to his head, like an army buzz cut. It seemed to make his features, his nose, his chin, more obvious. His forehead was furrowed, his dark, almost black, eyebrows raised in that familiar ironic expression, his mouth suggestively half open, those full lips inviting. She stood still, hands thrust deep into her pockets, her hair clinging limply to her face. He was wearing the pink checked shirt she’d once bought him and she wondered if he’d chosen it deliberately or if it was an accident of fate. Or maybe Sue had chosen it for him? Elizabeth imagined rows of freshly laundered shirts on padded silk coat hangers, his wife running her hands over them, lifting one down, laying it carefully on the bed for him. She clenched her fists in her pockets. There was still something unreachable about Hutch, some bit of him she couldn’t penetrate. She hesitated. She could run away, right now. But then Hutch half stood up, still not taking his eyes off her, and his arm was stretched out, his hand open like a supplicant, and she felt the familiar enticing pull. She shrugged as if to say, here I am, the old fool, back again. She opened the door and stepped inside.

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