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The Clumsies Make a Mess of the Airport
Sorrel Anderson
Shortlisted for the Roald Dahl Funny prize 2010, The Clumsies are back in their sixth and most hilarious book yet and they’re making a very big mess of the airport.More sparklingly funny adventures about the much-loved talking mice that live under Howard's desk, eat his biscuits, try and help him out, but only ever end up making a mess. This time they are at the airport, but a mix up at security sees the Clumsies end up in the wrong suitcase and running amok in Departures
For R. J. P and D. M. P
Contents
Cover (#ua9a015e6-bfa4-5eaf-aa1e-bc740f8612e4)
Title Page (#udcdc5483-736f-5455-a14f-6b46101ef402)
Dedication
Check in, check out, shake it all about
Knickers
Drummond and the nose cones, part 1
Drummond and the nose cones, part 2
Copyright (#litres_trial_promo)
About the Publisher (#litres_trial_promo)
The Clumsies Make a Mess
The Clumsies Make a Mess of the Seaside
The Clumsies Make a Mess of the Big Show
The Clumsies Make a Mess of the Zoo
The Clumsies Make a Mess of the School
It was a Tuesday morning and Howard and the Clumsies were going on holiday. Howard was carrying a
bag and feeling
. Purvis was carrying a small bag and feeling eager.
Mickey Thompson was carrying a sombrero and staring at a vending machine while Allen the dog and Ortrud the elephant (carrying nothing), were looking a little bit
as they gazed around the airport’s vast departure hall.
Howard glanced down at them.
‘There’s no need for
he said, bracingly. ‘We’re all going to have a nice, relaxing time, aren’t we?’
Allen and Ortrud nodded
Purvis nodded eagerly and Mickey Thompson began to
‘We’re going to
he shouted
‘Yes, indeed,’ said Howard. ‘Our holiday starts right here; the travelling’s all part of the fun.’
‘Oh, I can’t wait, I can’t wait,’ said Mickey Thompson. He stuck out his arms like wings and raced off shouting
‘COME BACK,’
Howard.
went Mickey Thompson, racing back and
into Howard’s foot.
‘Ouch,’ said Howard.
‘Sorry, Howard,’ said Purvis, grabbing his brother before he could set off again. ‘He’s over-excited about the
‘We’re going to
a million miles fast and a billion miles
than the sun,’ announced Mickey Thompson. Ortrud
in alarm and Allen looked a little
‘PURVIS!’ said Howard, loudly. ‘Tell us which part of the holiday you’re most looking forward to.’
‘Travelling wisely,’ said Purvis, delving into his bag and producing a well-thumbed book called “The Wise Traveller”.
‘It has all sorts of useful information,’ he said, ‘but there were one or two things I wanted to ask you, Howard.’
‘Ask away,’ said Howard. Purvis opened the book and out
a drawing of Howard in a
swimsuit,
on a tropical-looking beach.
a minute,’ said Howard.
‘Yes,
a minute,’ said Mickey Thompson. ‘That’s my drawing; I did it last week.’
‘I know,’ said Purvis. ‘I borrowed it to use as a bookmark.’
‘I’ve been looking for it everywhere,’
Mickey Thompson. ‘I wanted to
it up in the office.’
‘We will,’ said Purvis, ‘as soon as we get back from holiday.’
‘Oh no we won’t,’ said Howard. ‘It’s unflattering.’
‘It isn’t,’ protested Mickey Thompson. ‘It looks just like you.’
‘I disagree,’ said Howard.
‘I think it’s
good,’ said Purvis.
‘So do I,’ said Mickey Thompson.
‘But, but,’
Howard.
‘Listen,’ said Purvis, tapping his book.
‘“The wise traveller is a calm traveller, remaining cheerful at all times and never bickering with his, or her, companions.”’
‘Sensible advice,’
Howard. ‘Now, what was it you wanted to ask?’
‘Well,’ said Purvis, ‘there are chapters on safaris and camel trains and hot air ballooning, and what to wear
and what to pack and what to say, but I couldn’t find anything about airports.’
‘Nothing at all?’ said Howard, sounding
‘No,’ said Purvis, ‘so I don’t know what it is we’re supposed to do here.’
‘It’s simple,’ said Howard. ‘First we check in at “check in”. He pointed at a sign marked “Check in”, and everyone looked and
.
‘Check in,’
Mickey Thompson. ‘Check in.’
‘Then we go through security.’ Howard pointed at a
queue of people shuffling quietly under a sign marked “Security”. Everyone nodded and looked.
‘After security we leave the “landside” part of the airport, which is here, and go to the “airside” part of the airport, which is through there.’ Howard pointed at some double doors marked “Airside through here”, and everyone looked slightly
.
‘Then we wait until it’s time for us to
.’
Mickey Thompson started
again and stuck out his arms.
‘Not so
,’ said Howard, grabbing him before he could run off. ‘This airport is a
and busy place full of
and busy people, so it’s very important we all keep together: we don’t want anyone getting lost, or
, do we?’
‘No, Howard,’ said the mice.
‘No, Howard,’ agreed Howard. ‘Please explain it to Allen and Ortrud, too.’
‘They heard you,’ said Purvis.
‘They’re still looking
said Howard, peering at them. ‘No need for
he said bracingly, again. ‘We’re all going to have a nice,
holiday.’
‘We certainly are,’ said Purvis. ‘Ortrud wants to go snorkelling and Allen would like to try golf.’
‘Excellent,’ said Howard. ‘And I’m going to take you all to see the Armitage Museum.’
‘Oh,’ said Purvis. ‘Yes.’
