скачать книгу бесплатно
But why would a caring God, a God who assigned each person an angel, take a man’s wife and leave a little girl motherless? Why would He allow a vicious drunk to steal a boy’s home and toss him out on the streets to fend for himself? Where was God in that?
He didn’t know. But more and more lately, he wanted to reconcile Lindsey’s God with the one in his head.
“Silent Night” drifted into his awareness. Lindsey moved away, back to the nativity. Other than the floodlights she’d asked him to rig up, the set looked ready to him. As she adjusted the sheep and fluffed the hay inside the manger, joy practically oozed from her.
Sure she was happy. Why shouldn’t she be? Other than losing her elderly grandparents, Lindsey had probably never had a moment’s heartache in her life. Loving God and exuding tranquility was easy for her.
Frustrated at his line of depressive thinking, he yanked hard on a tangled cord, and turned his mind to more important matters—his search.
They had trees to haul this week which would give him the time and opportunity to ask questions in town. Yesterday at the courthouse he’d slipped up once, expressing to the clerk his interest in the transaction that gave Lindsey’s grandfather ownership of the Christmas Tree Farm. When the woman had looked at him curiously, he’d covered his tracks with vague remarks about Lindsey’s plans for expansion. If only he could talk freely with someone like Clarence or Loraine Stone, the couple who claimed to have known Charlie Mitchell so well. Sooner or later, by biding his time and listening, he’d have his opportunity.
After dusting and organizing the main pieces of the nativity, Lindsey went back to the storage shed for the final figure—the eight-foot-tall animated camel who blinked long-lashed eyes and mooed. She tugged and pulled, careful not to damage the heavy object in the journey across the rough field. Stopping to readjust, she saw Jesse leap the fence and trot in her direction.
“Why didn’t you say something?”
“I can get it.”
With a look of exasperation, he hoisted the camel into his strong arms. “You shouldn’t have to. That’s why you hired me.”
Oddly touched and feeling more like a helpless female than she’d ever felt in her life, Lindsey traipsed along beside him. How could she not admire this man? Every time she turned around, he was lifting work from her shoulders, both literally and figuratively. She’d never seen anyone work so hard for so little pay. And for all his silences and secrets, Jesse had a way of making her feel special.
Lindsey wasn’t sure if that was such a good idea, given the spiritual differences between them, but she liked Jesse Slater. And she loved his little girl.
As if he’d heard her thoughts of Jade, Jesse spoke. His voice came from the opposite side of the camel’s hump.
“Jade will be excited when she sees all this.”
“You don’t think she’ll be disappointed that we did so much without her?” She’d worried about that all day. After the way Jade had begged to take part, Lindsey didn’t want her hurt. But setting up the farm for Christmas took time.
“I explained to her last night that we’d have to do most of the work today. She was okay with it as long as she gets to do something.”
A jingle bell came loose from the saddle and Lindsey ducked beneath the camel’s neck to retrieve it.
“I promised to save the ‘best stuff’ until she gets here. She and I are going to put up the wreaths and decorate that tree up front.” She pointed toward the entrance, the bell in hand jingling merrily. “And she can flip on the lights as soon as the sun sets. I hope that’s enough.”
Jesse’s silver eyes, lit by an inner smile, slanted toward her. “You’re amazing with her, you know it?”
Buoyed by the compliment, Lindsey shook the bell at him and grinned. “I cheat. I use Christmas.”
The teasing admission moved the smile from Jesse’s eyes to his lips, changing his rugged, bad-boy expression into a breathtaking sight. That solitary action shot a thrill stronger than adrenaline through Lindsey. Someday, she’d break all the way through the ice he’d built around himself and make him smile all the time.
Startled at such thinking, Lindsey rushed ahead to open the gate. Where had that come from? Jesse was her employee and maybe her friend. But that was all he could be.
Heart thudding in consternation, she analyzed the thought. As a Christian, she wanted to see him happy. She wasn’t falling for him. Was she? She’d been in love with a man like Jesse before—a devastatingly handsome man filled with secrets. And Sean had betrayed her so completely she’d come home to the farm and promised never to fall for a pretty face again.
Jesse eased the camel into place alongside the rough wooden building that sheltered the baby Jesus and his earthly parents. He’d already positioned bales of hay around the site and spread straw on the ground. Later, he’d rig up the spotlights and the Star of Bethlehem to bring the scene to life.
In minutes, he had the camel bellowing and blinking.
With a grimace, he shut off the mechanism. “Jade will love that monstrosity.”
With laughter and a clap of her hands, Lindsey put aside her troubled thoughts. “I thought as much. We’ll let her turn it on as soon as she gets home from school.”
Jesse dusted his hands down the sides of his jeans, one corner of his mouth quirking ever-so-slightly. “What’s next? Singing Santas? Yodeling elves?”
“Nothing quite that fun. We’d better begin cutting and baling. I’d like to haul the first load tomorrow if we have enough ready.”
“So soon?”
“The rush begins on Thanksgiving. That’s only a week away. Stores and lots like to have their trees ready to sell.”
Switching off the last strains of “Silent Night,” he gestured in the direction of the trees. “Lead on, boss lady.”
Though disappointed to lose the beautiful music, Lindsey hummed Christmas carols as they began the process of cutting the marked and graded trees. Jesse manned the chain saw and as each tree toppled, Lindsey slid a rolling sled-like device beneath the pine and pulled it to the waiting baler.
Accustomed to lifting the heavy trees, Lindsey manhandled each one into the cone-shaped baler to be compressed into a tight bundle and secured with netting.
Saw in one gloved hand, Jesse poked his head around a tree. “Leave those for me to lift and bale.”
“We’d never get finished that way. I’m used to the work, Jesse. Stop fretting.”
But pleasure raced through her blood when he laid aside the saw long enough to lift the baled tree onto the flatbed truck. She might be accustomed to heavy work, but being treated like a girl was a novel and somewhat pleasant, if misguided, occurrence.
Following him back into the wide row, and lost in thought, Lindsey never saw the danger coming. One minute, she was examining a hole in her glove and the next she heard the crack and whine of falling timber.
“Lindsey, look out!”
She looked, but all she saw was green blocking the gray-blue sky and rapidly closing in on her.
Then all the air whooshed from her lungs as Jesse came flying and knocked her to the ground, taking the brunt of the felled pine across his back and head.
She tasted dust and pine sap. Prickly needles poked over Jesse’s shoulders and scratched the side of her face. Her pulse pounded and her knees trembled as if she’d done jumping jacks for the last hour.
One arm flung protectively over her head, his chest lying across her back, Jesse’s warm breath puffed against her ear. “Are you okay?”
He sounded scared.
“Fine.” She struggled to draw air into her lungs. “You?”
“Yeah.” Jesse’s heart raced wildly against her shoulder blades. The situation was anything but intimate, and yet Lindsey was aware of him in an entirely new way.
“You’re crushing me,” she managed.
“Sorry.” He shoved the tree to one side before rolling to a sitting position.
Offering a hand, he pulled Lindsey up to sit beside him. Breath coming in rapid puffs, his concerned gaze checked her over.
With a tenderness usually reserved for Jade, he stroked one calloused finger down her cheek. “You have a scratch.”
She studied his face, but resisted the urge to touch him. Already her skin tingled from his simple gesture, and her insides were too rattled from the accident to think straight. Her throat felt tight and thick. “So do you.”
He flicked one shoulder, tossing off her concern like an unwanted gum wrapper.
“I’ll heal.” He took a deep breath and blew out a gusty sigh. “Man, that scared me. I can’t believe I let that tree get away from me.”
“Not your fault. I heard the saw. I knew you were harvesting, but I was…distracted.” She wasn’t about to tell him that he’d been the distracting element. And now she was more discombobulated than ever. Jesse had put himself in harm’s way to protect her. And she liked the feeling of having a man—of having Jesse—look after her.
Oh, dear. She could be in real trouble here if she didn’t watch her step. There was no denying Jesse’s attractiveness, but the idea of letting another handsome face turn her head was worrisome. Jesse’s secretiveness and his resistance to the Lord bothered her, too. But as a Christian, she wanted to provide a shining example of Christ’s love; to share the incomprehensible peace of mind the Lord had given her.
Somewhere there had to be a midway point between being Jesse’s friend in Christ and falling for him.
She only wished she knew how to find it.
Chapter Seven
“Are you sure you don’t mind?” Jesse asked the moment he and Jade arrived on Thanksgiving Day. “We can still head down to the Caboose and grab a bite to eat.”
A sharp wind, the likes of which rip and tear across Oklahoma with the energy of wild, vicious dogs, swept a draught of cold air into the farmhouse.
Though the oven had warmed the place considerably, Lindsey wasn’t one to fritter away expensive heating fuel. She plucked at the quilted sleeve of Jesse’s coat and pulled him inside.
“And waste this feast I’ve been cooking all morning? Not a chance, mister. You are stuck with my home cooking. No arguments.”
Ducking beneath her daddy’s arms, Jade slipped into the house and started shedding her outerwear. She wore a red wool coat Lindsey had never seen before over a plaid jumper, black tights and patent-leather shoes. Lindsey’s heart did a funny stutter-step. Jesse had dressed her up for Thanksgiving dinner.
“You guys toss your coats in the bedroom. I need to check on the dressing and sweet potatoes.”
Hands on the snaps of his jacket, Jesse stood in the kitchen doorway sniffing the air. “Candied sweet potatoes?”
She nodded. “With marshmallows and brown sugar.”
He let out a low groan. “Forget the Caboose. I wouldn’t leave now even if you chased me with that shotgun of yours.”
Lindsey couldn’t hold back the rush of pleasure. She knew she was blushing and quickly bent over the oven door to blame her increased color on the heat.
Asking Jesse and Jade to Thanksgiving dinner made perfect sense. They had no other place to go, and she had no family living close enough to cook for. In fact, she’d been as energetic as that silly bunny for the three days since Jesse had agreed to share the holiday with her.
“So,” Jesse said, coming back into the kitchen from putting away his wraps. “What can we do to help?”
The foil-covered turkey was nicely basted and already out of the oven. The dressing and sweet potatoes were almost ready as were the hot rolls. Though she didn’t want to admit as much to Jesse, she’d gotten up earlier than normal to bake everything the way her grandmother always had.
“We’ll be ready to eat soon.” She turned with a smile, wiping her hands on her bib apron. “You could set the table if you’d like.”
“Come on, Butterbean,” he said to Jade. “The slave driver is putting us to work.”
He was in high spirits today, a rare occurrence to Lindsey’s way of thinking. And she liked seeing him this way, without the load of care he usually wore like an anvil around his neck.
Jade’s dress shoes clicked on the kitchen floor as she helped her daddy spread the white lacy tablecloth and set out three of Granny’s best BlueWillow place settings.
After carefully positioning a knife and fork on top of paper napkins, she looked up. A small frown puckered her brow. “Where’s Sushi going to eat?”
“Sushi?” Lindsey hesitated, a potholder in one hand. “I put her in the extra bedroom.”
“Oh.” Turning back to her job, Jade said nothing more about the dog. The adults exchanged glances.
Jesse mouthed, “Don’t ask me.”
Jade seemed unmindful that she’d raised adult eyebrows with her concern for a dog she supposedly despised. Letting the subject drop, Lindsey returned to the task of getting the food on the table. In her peripheral vision, she caught the red flash of Jade’s plaid jumper and gleaming shoes.
“You sure look pretty today,” she said.
“Well, thank you, ma’am.” Jesse’s teasing voice had her spinning toward him. “You look pretty, too.”
Jade burst into giggles. “Daddy! She meant me. I’m pretty.”
On tiptoes, the little girl twirled in a circle.
Jesse slapped a hand against one cheek in mock embarrassment. “Do you mean to tell me that I don’t look pretty?”
Gap-tooth smile bigger than Dallas, Jade fell against him, hugging his legs. “You’re always pretty.”
Lindsey had to concur, even though she’d never before seen Jesse in anything but work clothes. Seeing him in polished loafers, starched jeans, and a light blue dress shirt that drew attention to his silvery eyes took her breath away.
Considering how decked-out the Slaters were, she was glad she’d taken the time to dress up a bit herself. Though her clothes were still casual, she’d chosen dark brown slacks instead of jeans and a mauve pullover sweater. And she’d put on earrings, something usually reserved for church. They were only small filigree crosses, but wearing them made her feel dressed-up.
With a wry wince of remembrance, she glanced down. If only she’d exchanged her fluffy house shoes for a snazzy pair of slides…Ah, well, she was who she was. As Granny used to say, you can’t make a silk purse out of a sow’s ear.
Delighted to have guests on Thanksgiving Day, she didn’t much care what anyone wore. Just having them here was enough.
After sliding a fragrant pan of yeast rolls from the oven, she slathered on melted butter, and dumped the rolls into a cloth-covered basket.
Without waiting to be told, Jesse put ice in the glasses and poured sweet tea from the pitcher Lindsey had already prepared.
“What’s next?” he asked, coming to stand beside her at the counter. He brought with him the scent of a morning shower and a manly cologne that reminded Lindsey of an ocean breeze at sunrise.
She, on the other hand, probably smelled like turkey and dressing with a lingering touch of pine.
“I think we’re about ready.” She handed a bowl of cranberry sauce to Jade. “If you’ll put this beside the butter, your daddy and I will bring the hot stuff.”
Jade took the bowl in both her small palms, carefully transferring the dish to the table. Jesse and Lindsey followed with the rest and settled into their places.
The trio sat in a triangle with Jesse taking the head of the table and the two ladies on either side of him. Lindsey, out of long habit, stretched out a hand to each of them.
Jade reacted instantly, placing her fingers atop Lindsey’s. After a brief, but noticeable interval, Jesse did the same, and then joined his other hand to his daughter’s.
The moment Jesse’s hand touched hers, Lindsey recognized her error. She hoped with all her might that the Lord would forgive her, because she was having a hard time concentrating on the prayer with Jesse’s rough, masculine skin pressing against hers.
Somehow she mumbled her way through, remembering to thank God for her many blessings during the past year, including the blessing of Jesse and Jade.
