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“This isn’t a game, Mary Elizabeth. While you’ve been gone, the rest of us have been left to watch Hank. The man’s been miserable without you, but he’s gotten by. Unless you’re really sure about what you want, don’t start something up with him.”
Lizzy looked her mother squarely in the eye. “I was never the one who was unsure, Mom. Hank didn’t just let me go. He practically pushed me out the door. You all seem so all-fired sure that he wants me, but he’s never once given me any evidence of that. How come nobody seems worried that I’m the one who’s going to wind up hurt?”
“Because you’ve always been able to pick yourself up and dust yourself off, just the way the song says. And maybe because you’re the one who’s going to walk away in a couple of weeks.” She gave Lizzy a penetrating look. “Aren’t you?”
“Yes,” Lizzy said quietly. No matter how things turned out when she saw Hank Robbins again, she was going to be on that flight back to Miami. She sighed heavily. “Maybe I won’t go for that ride this afternoon, after all. I think I’ll go on up to my room and unpack. I’ve got some thinking to do.”
“The answers aren’t in your room,” her mother argued. “Something tells me they’re out in Hank’s south pasture.”
Lizzy grinned at her beautiful mother. Janet Runningbear Adams’s Native American ancestry had grown more pronounced as the years lined her face. Her straight black hair was streaked with gray now, but her eyes sparkled with intelligence and wisdom.
“Now who’s trying to manipulate me?” Lizzy teased. “You’ve been with Daddy way too long.” Her expression sobered. “He really is going to be all right, isn’t he?”
Her mother met her gaze evenly. “If he takes it easy and stops sneaking into the kitchen for ice cream when I’m not looking. I’m thinking of having the refrigerator padlocked.”
“It won’t do a bit of good. He’ll just find somebody in the family who’ll sneak things in for him.”
“You’re probably right. I caught Harlan Patrick taking cigars up to him the other day. He swore he’d just forgotten to take them out of his pocket, but Cody’s boy never could lie worth a darn. You should have heard your daddy when he found out I’d confiscated the things.”
“When did Daddy start smoking cigars?”
“When he found out he shouldn’t. He puffs on one every now and again just because he knows it makes me furious.”
Lizzy chuckled. “He does know how to rile you, doesn’t he?”
“Oh my, yes.”
“Mom, I’m sorry I wasn’t here when he got sick and that I couldn’t get back right away.”
“Oh, sweetie, don’t feel bad about that. You have a right to live your life. And neither of us wanted you to take time off from your studies when we knew everything was going to turn out fine. Of course, your father and I both wish you were closer to home and that we could see you more often, but we’re proud of you. Taking on medical school is a big deal. We know you’re going to be a fine doctor.”
Lizzy thought of the grades she’d gotten on her last exams. “I wish I had your confidence.”
Her mother regarded her with concern. “Troubles with your classes?”
“Nothing to worry about,” Lizzy reassured her. “I’ll get a grip on things once I get back.”
“I’m sure you will. Now, go. If you’re not going for a ride, get some rest before supper. You’ll need it to fend off all the nosy questions. Your brothers and Jenny may complain about Harlan’s meddling ways, but they’ve inherited the tendency.”
Lizzy retreated to her room, which remained exactly as she had left it, with the ruffled curtains and rodeo posters, an admittedly incongruous mix that pretty much summed up her personality.
Instead of unpacking, though, she went straight to the window seat and settled back against the mound of pillows, staring out across the rugged terrain, imagining Hank out there somewhere, his skin bronzed by the sun and glistening with sweat.
Tomorrow, she thought. Tomorrow she would face him and find out if anything at all had changed between them. With luck she wouldn’t be able to stand the sight of him. She sighed at the improbability of that. With better luck, he would sweep her into his arms and tell her he couldn’t live without her. Now that, probable or not, was something worth waiting for.
Chapter Two (#ulink_dd9e6e03-122a-56e2-8f44-44d3666c6ba9)
A man could only mend the same fence so many times without looking like a darned fool, Hank thought as the sun beat down on his bare back. Cody Adams had passed by twice the day before just to get in a few taunts about the obviousness of his activity and to keep him updated on Lizzy’s whereabouts.
Even if Cody hadn’t told him, though, Hank was pretty sure he would have known the precise instant Lizzy was back at White Pines. He could feel her presence. The air seemed to crackle with the electricity of it. And that old familiar ache in the region of his heart started up again.
“Just come to dinner at White Pines tonight,” Cody had suggested. “You know you’d be welcome. The whole family will be there.”
“I know that.” Hank said.
He liked the whole Adams clan, from Harlan on down. They’d always made him feel like one of them. The littlest rascals in the family were so used to his presence, they had even taken to calling him Uncle Hank. He’d liked the feeling of belonging and he’d enjoyed spending many an evening with them since buying his ranch, but this was different This time Lizzy would be there, and he didn’t know what kind of welcome to predict from her, not when they’d parted on such uneasy terms.
“Another time,” he said, covering his regret.
“She won’t be here forever,” Cody had reminded him. “And we have a bet.”
“It’s her first day home. There will be time for me to make good on that ridiculous bet.”
Call it masculine pride or sheer muleheadedness, but what he didn’t say was that he wanted Lizzy to come to him, that he wanted to know that she’d missed him at least enough to finally seek him out.
Oh, he knew as sure as shooting that she’d been avoiding him all these years. He’d seen the flush of embarrassment in her cheeks after she’d kissed him on the eve of her departure for college. He’d also seen the quick rise of anger and pride when he hadn’t tried to stop her from leaving. She’d been so sure he would, so confident that that kiss would make a difference. He’d seen that, too.
Little did she know what letting her go had cost him. That unexpected kiss had turned him inside out No woman had ever made him want so much. And no woman had ever been so far out of reach. The distance was far greater than the miles between Los Piños and Austin or even the miles between home and Miami. They were separated by their dreams.
His were simple. He wanted a wife and children and a small ranching operation that he could take pride in having built from the ground up. The Triple Bar was his. There was no history or conditions tied to it, the way there would have been if he’d stayed at his daddy’s place. In that, he was a whole lot like Luke Adams, the oldest of Harlan’s sons.
Lizzy’s hopes and ambitions were more complex and all-encompassing. Harlan Adams had laid the world at the feet of his baby daughter, and she had embraced it all. Hank wasn’t sure she could ever be happy with a life as quiet and self-contained as the one he could offer.
He knew—he had always known—that he wanted more from her than a brief, passionate fling. And for that, she had to come to him in her own time, on her own terms. He’d long ago accepted the fact that she might never come at all.
Knowing that, he’d turned Cody’s invitation down, then spent a miserable night back at his own ranch, cursing the day he’d ever met the pretty little sixteen-year-old who’d gone and grown up into a beautiful, willful woman who’d twisted his heart into knots. No man should have to contend with loving a woman like that and watching her walk away.
Today he was back in the same pasture, doing the same work all over again, hoping to catch at least a glimpse of her. What kind of fool did that make him? He’d been asking himself that since sunup and he didn’t like the answer any better now than he had hours ago.
Hopefully, Cody wasn’t spreading the word about what a pitiful spectacle Hank was making of himself. When he glanced up a few moments later, he thought he was seeing things. There was Lizzy Adams strolling across his pasture looking very much at home and pretty as a picture in her snug jeans and bright red shirt, her black hair streaming down her back under a big black Stetson. Right at this second, with that long, athletic stride of hers, she was a cowgirl through and through. He could almost make himself believe she hadn’t changed at all.
Nor, unfortunately, had his reaction to her. His blood heated as if she’d done a whole lot more than offer him a smile and a wave. He was glad then that he’d waited to see her, glad that this first meeting wasn’t taking place in front of all those prying, hopeful Adams eyes.
She looked confident and sassy and so damned tempting that Hank clutched the posthole digger a little tighter to keep from dragging her straight into his arms and giving her a proper—well, improper, actually—welcome.
Lizzy didn’t seem inclined to show the same restraint. Her pace never even slowed as she sashayed toward him, lifted her hands to his cheeks, gazed straight into his eyes and planted a kiss on him guaranteed to fell a saint. The woman never had hesitated to take what she wanted. Her daddy had always led her to believe that it was her due.
There was hunger and passion and maybe even a little greedy desperation in that kiss on his part and hers. She smelled of sunshine and some kind of exotic flower and she tasted just the way he’d remembered with a hint of mint on her breath. They were both trembling and breathless by the time she pulled away.
“Damn,” she murmured, her expression shaken.
Hank grinned. He knew precisely how she felt, as if the ground had shifted under their feet when everyone had declared the earthquake safely past He dredged up his sense of humor to keep from revealing how shaken he, too, had been, how eager he was for more.
“Was it everything you remembered?” he taunted.
She scowled up at him. “Oh, go to hell.”
“Now, that’s a fine way to greet an old neighbor.”
“The kiss was the greeting. The rest was regrets.”
He laughed at that. “I know exactly what you mean.”
She regarded him suspiciously. “You do?”
“I was kinda hoping I’d gotten it all wrong, too. Care to try again, just in case the first time was an accident?” The question had nothing to do with his bet with Cody and everything to do with his longing for further experimentation. He’d spent too many restless nights dreaming of having this woman back in his arms. The discovery that she still fit him like the other half of a carved piece of wood was too tempting to resist.
Lizzy shook her head as if to clear it. “No, please. Once was enough to prove the point.”
“Coward.”
“Me?” she protested. “If you thought the last kiss was all that great, where have you been for the past five years?”
He liked the disgruntled attitude and decided to spur it on. “Comparison shopping,” he said.
She frowned at that.
Hank clung to the tiny hint of jealousy. “According to your family, you haven’t exactly been living in a cocoon,” he accused, immediately proving that he was just as capable of envy. Every mention of a man in Lizzy’s life had set acid to churning in his gut, though until now he’d been good at hiding it.
“True.”
He studied her speculatively. “So, Miss Lizzy, what do we do now? Wait another five years before we try it again?”
She considered that, her expression thoughtful as her gaze locked with his. Heat sizzled in the air. Finally she shook her head. “Pick me up at six.”
Hank’s pulse kicked up like an unbroken horse at the touch of a saddle. “For?”
“I wish I knew,” she said with a sigh. “Trouble, more than likely.”
“Now, Miss Lizzy, I do like the sound of that,” he retorted.
“Don’t go getting any wild ideas, cowboy,” she said, and started to clamber back over the fence.
Hank wasn’t ready to see her go. Not yet, not even with the promise of a whole evening ahead of him. “Lizzy?”
“Yes?”
“If you’re not busy,” he said oh so casually, “why don’t you stick around?”
“Why?” she asked bluntly. “You need some help with this fence? Word is it was just fine before you started tampering with it.”
He winced at the direct hit, but pressed on. “Actually, I was hoping you’d join me for lunch. I brought a couple of extra sandwiches, just in case you happened by.”
Her expression brightened. “Ham and cheese?” she asked, eyeing his saddlebags with a gleam in her eyes.
“On Mrs. Wyndham’s home-baked pumpernickel bread,” he said, knowing she would find that—if not him—irresistible.
“Did you bring pickles, too?”
“A whole jar.”
She was pawing through the saddlebags in an instant. When she’d plucked the thick, foil-wrapped sandwiches from them, her face lit up.
“I’ve dreamed of Mrs. Wyndham’s sandwiches,” she admitted as she moved to a spot in the shade of a huge old cottonwood. “I’ve been in a lot of delis the past few years, but none of them has gotten it quite right. Your housekeeper ought to be declared a national treasure.”
“It’s the bread,” Hank said, taking a spot beside her and stretching his legs out in front of him. “I don’t know what she puts in it, but the taste can’t be matched.”
“How’d you remember that I loved these so much?”
If only she knew how many times he’d sifted through the memories of every moment they’d ever shared. After all, she’d trailed after him for years, pestering him with questions and as time passed and she grew into a woman, blistering him with looks hot enough to sizzle steak.
“I remember a lot of things,” he said quietly, his hat low so she couldn’t read his expression.
“Such as?”
He could pretend, as he had done so many times in the past, treat the question dismissively, or he could tell the truth. Maybe it was time for a little straightforward honesty between them.
“For one thing, the way your eyes light up with golden sparks when you take the first bite,” he said, tilting the hat back and keeping his gaze on her steady. “The way your tongue darts out to lick the mustard from your lips. The way you always save one bite as if you can’t quite bear to finish.”
She blinked and swallowed hard, but it was Hank who looked away first. If he started cataloging all the rest of the things he remembered about Lizzy, they’d waste the whole afternoon and his blood would be in a heated frenzy.
“How’s med school?” he asked, forcing a neutral tone into his voice. This was safer ground, turf that would remind him of all that stood between them still.
“Okay.”
“Still getting straight As?”
“Not this quarter,” she said.
He heard the rare insecurity in her voice and wondered at it. “How come? Is it tougher than you expected?”
Even as he asked it, he wondered if he wanted the answer to be yes, wanted med school to be so tough that she’d give up on it and come home. But of course, Lizzy was no quitter and coming home a failure wouldn’t sit well with her. That was no way to get what he wanted, and he knew it.
“Not so tough. I just haven’t been able to keep my mind on my studies the way I should the past few weeks.”
“Since Harlan’s heart attack?” he guessed, knowing how mat would have thrown her. He’d almost called her then to offer support or sympathy or, just as likely, to finally hear the sound of her voice again. That was what had held him back. He hadn’t fully understood his own motives, and that was dangerous with a woman like Lizzy.
She nodded, then faced him, her green eyes with those daggling flecks of gold now clouded with worry. “Do you know how he is?” she asked. “I keep getting the feeling that nobody’s telling me the whole truth.”
He wanted to smooth away her frown, but settled for a teasing comment intended to do the same job. “Hey, you’re the budding doctor. Couldn’t you tell by looking at him that he’s doing okay?”
“He looks good,” she admitted. “But he wouldn’t let me examine him.”
Hank chuckled at her disgruntled tone. “I’m surprised you didn’t wrestle him down and do it anyway.”
“Believe me, I was tempted.” She regarded him thoughtfully. “And you haven’t answered my question, either. How is he?”
“What did your mother say?”
