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He was still grinning like a rogue when the waitress brought their meals. He cut into his meat. She studied the silverware pattern and pushed away her guilt. She wanted to be someone new in his eyes.
She glanced up and met his amused gaze. “Your reputation precedes you, Colt. I know all about you.”
His smile disappeared. “Everything?”
She wasn’t sure what everything was. “Just gossip, I suppose. People like to talk.”
He reached for his water. “The gossip started with my mom. Her folks, my grandparents, built Bluff Creek, the recreational ranch I inherited. Grandma ran the bed and breakfast and Grandpa took tourists on pack rides. Fishing and camping, nature trails, that sort of thing.” A short laugh barked from his chest. “But when Grandpa hired this big Indian fellow to help out, he got a little more than he bargained for. Toby Raintree took a shine to my mom. Problem was, she was only sixteen and Toby was twenty or so. Grandpa sent the Cheyenne packing, but the damage had already been done. I arrived nine months later.”
Colt raked his hands through his hair, deep-set eyes reflecting old wounds. Melanie thought about her own unbecoming beginnings. She was illegitimate, too. “You don’t have to tell me everything, Colt. If it makes you uncomfortable...”
“We’re talking about making a baby. I think we should be candid with each other.” A shrug jerked his brawny shoulders. “Besides, my family loved me, even if I had a bit of Toby in me. I wasn’t wild on purpose. I wasn’t trying to prove anything. It’s just who I was.”
She teased him with a feminine toss of her head. He was staring. Seriously considering her for the baby-making job, she thought. “I heard you were a spoiled rich boy.”
His grin was wry. “Overindulged, maybe.”
The waitress came by and cleared their plates. He had finished his meal, she’d done a lot of rearranging on her plate. If he noticed her lack of appetite, he didn’t comment on it. They both ordered a cup of coffee, passed on dessert.
“I have to know, Melanie. Is it the money?”
She couldn’t help herself from bristling. “I didn’t bring up your family’s money because I need it.”
“It’s my money now. My family’s gone. And I’m offering a fair amount to the woman who has my baby. I have a right to know what your true motivation is.”
She wanted to leap across the table, pummel his chest and shout that she loved him, that she hoped to keep his baby and share a life with him. “I plan to give the money to charity. A children’s organization of some kind. I have a successful career. I’m not in the business of selling babies.”
“And I’m not in the business of buying them,” he retorted, then softened his tone. “I had a daughter...a sweet little girl...” His eyes turned watery. “God, it seems like a lifetime ago. I just miss being a father. I didn’t mean to offend you. What you do with the money is your prerogative.”
He reached across the table for her hand, squeezed it apologetically. “Are you still interested, or did I just prove what an idiot I can be?”
Longing made her voice breathless. “I’m still interested.”
His fingertips brushed hers. “Will you come by the ranch tomorrow? I’d like to show you around. It’s a great place for a kid to grow up.”
“Certainly. I’d love to.”
Two hours later Melanie rocked on Glona’s weather-beaten porch, wearing a red cotton blouse, faded blue jeans, Harley-Davidson boots and an anxious expression that mirrored her fluttering heart.
Gloria’s youngest hummed a contented tune. The towheaded four-year-old reached for his favorite toy, a yellow dump trunk packed with tiny stones from the freshly graveled driveway. When he grinned, the cherry Popsicle stain around his mouth widened.
Seated beside him on the front step, his mother touched the back of his head and shuddered. “Colt’s daughter was about Joey’s age when she died. I can’t imagine losing a child.”
Melanie stilled the bentwood rocker. She remembered that summer. She’d come home for one of Gloria’s baby showers and learned Colt had just buried his estranged wife and daughter As usual, he’d been the talk of the town. She’d heard he was inconsolable, shutting out the world around him.
“What do you really think about him looking for a surrogate?”
“Truthfully?” Gloria ruffled her cropped hair, the spiky strawberry-blond strands still damp from Joey’s swimming lessons. She had always been fresh-scrubbed looking with a generous supply of freckles, cosmetics low on her list of priorities. “I think he’s lonely and misguided. He should marry again and have children the traditional way.”
“I had lunch with him today.” Melanie set the rocker in motion. It felt good to breathe the clean Montana air. Almost as life-sustaining as the sound of Colt’s husky drawl.
“A date? Oh, Mel, that’s wonderful.”
She gnawed her bottom lip. “It wasn’t exactly a date. I didn’t tell him my name used to be Gertrude. You see, we weren’t really meeting for old time’s sake.”
Joey’s mother shooed him into the house, bribing him with another Popsicle. “Just one,” she cautioned as the boy forgot about the truck and dashed off. She turned to Melanie, one eyebrow arching. “What’s going on?”
Melanie gazed out at the front yard. Along the fence, rows of late-blooming flowers and tall, scattered weeds fought for control. The garden hose attached to a sprinkler head slithered across the overgrown lawn like a giant snake. In the center of the damp grass a proud tree yielded a makeshift swing, a big, black tire swaying in the breeze.
Her beachfront property paled by comparison. A happy home surpassed a lonely, upscale, condo any day. “I told him I was interested in being his surrogate.”
“Oh, my Lord! You didn’t!”
Melanie set her jaw. “I did. And I am.”
Gloria shook her cropped head. “You, my dear, are not a good candidate. You’ve never even had a child. You’d never be able to turn your baby over to him.”
Plastering a smile on her face, Melanie ignored the other woman’s disapproving scowl. “Yes, I could. I’m too wrapped up in my career to think about raising a child. I’m—”
“Lying,” Gloria provided.
The phony smile faded. “You said it yourself. Colt needs a wife.”
“But he doesn’t want a wife. He wants a child, no strings attached.”
“I’ll make him change his mind.” That car accident had given her a new outlook on life. It had taught her to go after what she wanted. And more than anything, she wanted Colt.
When Glona’s expression reflected Melanie’s biggest fear, her confidence wavered. Reminding herself to breathe, she closed her eyes and said a silent prayer. Please God, make Colt want me, too. Don’t let me fail.
She opened her eyes and addressed her friend. “You’re the one who gave me this idea.”
“What are you talking about?”
Melanie took another deep breath. How typical of Gloria to act innocent. “You couldn’t wait to tell me that he was looking for a surrogate. And you even said that I should be the one to have his baby.”
Gloria wrung her hands together. “I was kidding.”
“Baloney, that was a subliminal message and you dam well know it.”
“Sublimi—” The other woman stood up and began to pace. “Oh, my Lord, what have I done?”
Melanie forced a grin. If she couldn’t convince Gloria, then how could she convince Colt? “Oh, quit fretting. A little subconscious matchmaking never hurt anyone. Just wish me luck. Support my decision.”
The other woman paused. “Are you sure you’re in love with Colt? True love happens over time, and the two of you have never really spent any time together. I want you to be certain before you—”
“I am,” Melanie professed adamantly, meeting her friend’s concerned gaze. “From the first moment I saw him, I knew he was meant to be part of my life. And we did spend time together—every weekend for almost two years—I rode at his family’s ranch. He was good to me, Gloria. The kindest person I’d ever known.”
“He may not be so kind once he finds out what you’re up to.” When Gloria paced again, the wood planks squeaked below her feet. “I hate to say this, but there is the possibility he might not fall in love with you. Think about how serious this is, Mel.”
“I have.” Long and hard, every waking moment. “I’m not trying to trick Colt. And I know what the consequences are. If he doesn’t fall in love with me, then I’ll honor our original agreement.” Deep down, she kept telling herself that wouldn’t happen, but the realist in her knew it could.
Gloria’s jaw dropped. “You’d give him the baby?”
“Yes.” The next breath she took hurt. Deeply. “I vowed a long time ago that if I could ever repay Colt for his kindness, I would. I’ve always wanted to change his life the way he changed mine.” She set the rocker in motion again—a movement as gentle as the breeze, as tender as Colt’s heart. “He made me realize my worth, helped me to believe in myself. I’m successful and strong because he convinced me I could be
“So you see, Gloria. If I have to, I’ll give him our baby.” She would give Colt a part of her that would live forever. “But as I said before, I’ll do whatever I can to make him want me.”
The other woman’s expression softened. “Oh, Mel, you really do love him.”
“Yes. I always have.” Melanie recalled how sensitive and protective he had been. When the other teenagers who frequented the rental stables made leering cracks about what a “nerdy brain” she was, Colt had countered their attacks, professing “I think intelligent women are sexy.” Time and time again, Colt Raintree had been her champion, her knight in shining armor. He would touch her cheek and tell her she was perfect—sweet and pure—one of earth’s angels.
Although their lives had taken separate paths, Colt’s image had never been far from her heart. She wanted him to be her first love. Her only love.
As an image of her teenage self surfaced, Melanie’s stomach fluttered. What an image: a shy, skinny little girl with mousy brown hair and a mouthful of silver braces. “Colt didn’t recognize me.”
“How could he? Let’s face it, you’ve changed.” Gloria tilted her blond head. “You do plan on telling him who you are, right?”
“Yes, but not right away.” Colt wanted a professional relationship with his surrogate. A woman who adored him during their teenage years certainly didn’t fall into that category. Until his baby lay cradled in her womb, she would keep her identity a secret.
“Are you sure that’s wise? I mean—” Gloria paused as Joey scampered out the front door and down the rickety porch steps. The boy had a Popsicle, probably his fourth, the rainbow around his mouth a conspicuous giveaway.
His mother latched on to his shirttail. “How many of those have you had?”
He squirmed. “Two.”
“Joey?”
“Three.”
She released her hold. “No more, okay?”
He grinned. His teeth were blue. “Okay, Mom.”
The child leaped onto the wet grass and both women laughed. Mom. Just the word alone made Melanie’s womb ache. The only man she had ever dreamed of having a baby with was Colt. At this point, being inseminated with his seed sounded romantic.
Melanie Richards had built a successful career, acquired self-esteem and survived a near-fatal accident, yet she had never forgotten the wild, black-haired boy who had treated her kindly when others had not; the boy with whom she had fallen hopelessly in love.
Colt wondered if she’d be early. They had agreed on 10:00 a.m. He glanced at his watch. It was 9:33.
Melanie Richards was an enigma. A beautiful, single, successful lady willing to have a baby for someone else. Something didn’t add up. Maybe she needed the dough. He wasn’t quite buying her I-plan-to-give-the-money-to-charity story. Being a surrogate was a job—nine months out of a woman’s life. He didn’t begrudge paying for the service, yet the idea of buying his own baby, in a sense, left him cold. He wanted the perfect scenario, a woman who needed to give a child as much as he needed to receive one. Melanie was going to have to tell him straight out why she was offering him the ultimate sacrifice. The most precious of gifts. Her motivation was still vague.
Colt flipped his leg over the leather recliner and reached for the coffee mug. Dang, he was actually anxious about seeing her again. Unfortunately he found himself physically attracted to her: a youthful complexion, big cornflower blue eyes, shoulder-length hair the color of autumn leaves, each strand unique in its vibrance. And her body? Enticing curves a man could ride, slow and sensual, like a smooth hypnotic current
He jerked forward when the doorbell sounded, locking the recliner in place. It was 9:40. She was early.
He pulled open the door. Pushed away his lust. Business and pleasure didn’t mix where women were concerned.
“Hi.” She smiled. She looked younger than the day before. Her blue jeans were faded, fraying at the knees, her denim blouse tied at the waist. A green ribbon secured her ponytail, but wispy tendrils had worked loose, gently framing a heart-shaped face. She smelled like citrus-scented soap, clean and fresh.
Colt glanced down and let out a low whistle. Her Western boots were ostrich. The lady had class. Money.
He stepped away from the door. “Come in.”
She was still smiling. “Boots are my weakness.”
Women like you are mine, he wanted to say. “Yeah, I can see that.”
She gazed around the room. “Impressive place.”
He followed the line of her eyes and assessed his surroundings with renewed interest. Constructed of native timber and pegged-beam ceilings, the six-bedroom homestead used to serve as the main lodge He’d considered renting it out and moving into one of the log cabins out back, but couldn’t bring himself to abandon his daughter’s room. Her pink canopy bed and favorite stuffed animals remained there, waiting for a child who would never return.
“Big place for one guy, huh?” he asked.
“Soon there will be two of you.”
He smiled at the thought. His home had been empty far too long. “The patter of little feet.”
“Little boots,” she amended.
He winked at her, something he hadn’t done to a woman in a long time. Melanie reminded him of his youth for some reason, and although she didn’t look familiar, she felt familiar. Something he didn’t quite understand. “Do you want a cup of coffee or iced tea or something?”
“Tea sounds nice.”
She followed him into the kitchen then sat down at the oak table in the adjoining dining room. It seated twelve. He poured a tall glass of sun tea and joined her. “We used to have people around all the time. Tourists. Sometimes I hated it, having strangers in my house. Other times, I really enjoyed it. When my grandparents died, I couldn’t keep the bed and breakfast going. I raise quarter horses. That keeps me busy.”
“My work keeps me busy, too.”
He brushed his hair out of his eyes. “If we decide to go through with this, I want full custody of the child. I’d want this to be like an adoption on your part.”
She gazed into her tea. “I know.”
“I couldn’t take another custody battle, Melanie. You have to be sure you can do this. You have to convince me I can trust you, that you’re being completely honest.”
A shadow hooded her blue eyes. They went from daylight to dark in an instant. “A custody battle? I don’t understand.”
He blew an anxious breath. His scars hadn’t healed. Dredging up the past hurt, but she had a right to know. “I wasn’t happily married. I married Shelly because of the baby. I never loved her the way a husband should. We argued all the time. She kept accusing me of cheating. I hadn’t been, but she was obsessively jealous. I couldn’t even talk to another woman. After a few miserable years, I told her I couldn’t take it anymore, that I wanted a divorce.”
Melanie twisted the dainty gold chain around her neck. Colt studied her nervous fingers, bit the inside of his lip and continued. “Things got real ugly after that And Meagan, our daughter, got caught in the middle.” He tugged a hand through his hair. “We ended up in court. It was a long, drawn-out process, but eventually I got custody of Meagan. Shelly was issued weekend and holiday visitations. The psychiatrist who testified seemed to think it was in our daughter’s best interest to remain with me.”
He pushed his chair back and gripped the tabletop, expelling pain and frustration from the past. “But the court ruling didn’t mean a damn thing because the first weekend Shelly had Meagan, she closed her bank accounts and ran. She kidnapped my little girl. Took her away from me.”
His brown knuckles whitened. The worst was yet to come. “Even though I searched and hired people, we never found them. A whole year went by and then one day the police showed up at my door Shelly and Meagan had been killed in a drive-by shooting in Chicago.” Colt caught his breath, felt the familiar sting beneath his eyes. “The last time I saw my five-year-old daughter was at her funeral.”
Someone had killed an innocent child because they’d mistaken Shelly’s car for one belonging to a rival gang member. His baby girl had met a violent death on a cold, empty street. Oh, they’d caught the lone gunman, but knowing that bastard was rotting in jail hadn’t eased his pain. Colt had vowed to himself over and over that no one would ever take another child from him again. Not the child’s mother nor some sick, violent stranger. He would protect this baby with his life.
Melanie looked up. Her eyes were lined with tears. “I’m sorry,” she whispered.
Colt’s heart clenched. A part of him hated what he was asking her to do. Deep down, he knew a child should be raised by two loving parents, yet Shelly’s deception had made it impossible for him to welcome another woman back into his life. Had Shelly not kidnapped Meagan, his daughter would still be alive.
