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Pulling Cam to her again, she put her arms around him and held him gently, cradling him. “I’m so sorry, honey. I—I don’t— I’m sorry.” Holly just stood and held her son. A tear slid from beneath her closed eyes. Cam squeezed her back, his thin body reminding her that he was just a child who needed help in understanding what happened around him.
Ethan cleared his throat. Holly still had to deal with the situation that had brought him here in the first place. No matter what Cameron was going through, she couldn’t condone his behavior and needed to get a handle on it quickly before it spun further out of control.
Releasing her son, she lifted his chin and stared into his unhappy eyes. “I’m still upset by your actions at Mr. Pellegrino’s house. You know what you did was wrong.”
“Yes,” Cam agreed halfheartedly.
“Good. And you know there’s going to be a consequence.”
“But—”
“No buts.” After wiping her hands on her jeans, she glanced at her landlord, surprised to see such compassion before his expression closed. “We’re going to Mr. Pellegrino’s house this weekend to remove the graffiti. Patrick, too, as soon as I talk to his parents.”
“That won’t be necessary.”
Holly took a step back and openly stared at the man. With his arms now folded across his chest and his legs spread shoulder-width apart, she deemed him another force to be reckoned with. The tick in his jawline and the immobile line of his lips didn’t help, either.
“It is necessary.” She placed her hands on Cam’s shoulders and spun him around to face the man. “My son needs to be held responsible for his actions. Why else would you have brought him here if you didn’t want some sort of resolution, Mr. Pellegrino?”
“Please, call me Ethan. Point taken. I’ll stop by tomorrow to set up the details.” He rubbed the stubble on his chin and stared at her baldly. But it was the words he didn’t say that concerned Holly. Her gut told her that when Mr. Pellegrino—no, Ethan—came by tomorrow, he’d have her eviction notice ready to add to the pile of past-due invoices underneath her counter.
* * *
“Welcome to ’Tis Always the Season.” Holly glanced up from her computer the next day. When she saw who stood at the threshold of her shop, her heart began to beat rapidly inside her chest.
“Afternoon.” Ethan Pellegrino took up more space than he should. A small gust of wind carried in the snowflakes and made her shiver, but that wasn’t what stole her breath away and froze her spine into a straight line. Crossing her arms, she leaned against the counter.
His expression matched the snow-laden clouds in the sky behind him. Not surprising, since she knew the nature of his visit today. She’d been expecting him, but that still didn’t make today’s conversation any easier.
Ethan rubbed his left hand over his five-o’clock shadow and broke eye contact for a moment. Hesitation danced over his features as he let out a sigh. “I won’t sugarcoat the situation. I was going to come by at the end of the week. Yesterday’s incident made it that much sooner. You know I’m here to collect the past-due rent as well as talk about the garage.”
Holly stared at a bare spot on the counter. Heat stung her cheeks, and humiliation draped across her until the butterflies in her stomach begged for release. Four months behind in rent and more than one hundred and twenty days past due on most of her invoices, it had only been a matter of time. She’d just hoped she could get through Christmas and figure out another game plan before she had to close. “I know. Thanks for not bringing it up in front of Cam yesterday.”
“I’d like to think I have more tact than that.”
Her newly designed flyers on the counter caught her attention. Her idea was a good one, and people would hire her. People who came into the shop told her she had a flair for decorating, and she’d learned quite a bit from all the classes she’d taken at the local community college when they’d talked about opening the store. In about an hour, Cameron would come sullenly through the doors after school, and she’d had hopes they could fold, stuff and stamp the envelopes after he’d finished his homework. Unless Ethan gave her a reprieve, they’d have to scrounge boxes from the local market instead.
“I’m sorry. I don’t have the rent. But I’m working on it. I just need a bit more time.” Her voice squeaked and her fingers gripped the counter until her knuckles gleamed white. Jared had died with a life-insurance policy in place, but that had been eaten up by both their medical bills from the car accident, and things had been tough these past two years despite the social-security benefits. The rent due to Ethan had gone toward her mortgage payments, and the payments to her vendors had gone to her utility bills.
His expression remained detached. Unless he held her stuff as collateral, she could still sell the merchandise online and coordinate her decorating services from her home. It wouldn’t be easy, but it was the only fair thing to do. He needed a renter who could pay the rent, and it would be easier for her to not have to worry about it anymore. But to give up Jared’s dream... It would give her more time to focus on her son. She knew what she had to do even though the words were hard to form. “I’ll vacate immediately.”
A kaleidoscope of emotions flickered across his features but didn’t match his words. “How much time do you need?”
Closing her eyes for a brief second, and knowing this was for the best, Holly shuddered at the thought of boxing everything up. Jared’s hopes and dreams packed into a dark world and crowded together, lifeless, with no one to enjoy them. She fingered the carved baby Jesus ornament by the old-fashioned cash register that Jared had given her the day they’d opened the store, determination filling her every movement.
She would find everything in the store a new home and maybe bring in enough money to pay her mortgage and provide her son with a Christmas present this year. Straightening her shoulders, she flipped her hair back and met his gaze. “Well, if I can run a going-out-of-business sale for a few weeks, that should help. The rest I’ll auction off online, along with the trees and fixtures. Today’s November 3. Can I have until the end of the month?”
“Isn’t this supposed to be your busy season?” When Ethan used both hands to pick up the Santa snow globe from the counter and shake it, Holly noticed the scars covering his entire right hand and disappearing under his sleeve. When she saw the nubs where his fingers should have been, she bit her bottom lip. Now she understood his hesitation yesterday about shaking her hand. More heat claimed her cheeks, because she’d assumed he was being rude. What had happened? And did she really want to know?
Yes... No. Holly warred with her answer as compassion filled her. The scars looked fresh, but she didn’t have the time or the energy to open another place in her heart right now. Cameron and her money issues took up just about everything she had. She looked away, and from inside the globe, the jovial old man, the commercial epitome of the season, mocked her with his sack of presents. “It should be, but nothing’s been busy since the economy went south.”
Staring at the bits of white swirling around in the liquid inside the glass, Holly was reminded of her life right now. Drifting along but spiraling downward, resting at the bottom until someone came along and shook things up.
Like Ethan.
Not that she could blame him. Business was business.
When Ethan shook the globe again, she caught him looking at her over the top of the smooth glass. Lines were etched into the skin framing his deep blue eyes, but she sensed he had nothing to laugh about these days, either.
Her breath stalled, leaving her struggling to push away the strange, forgotten emotion gripping her heart. Moments passed before she managed to blink and break the effect he had on her. The snowflakes he’d carried in with him had melted, creating drops of water that glistened in his short, dark, wavy hair and on his jacket. Her instincts were to dust off the moisture so he wouldn’t catch a cold, but she refrained from leaning across the counter and touching him with anything but her gaze. A day’s growth of beard hugged the contours of his strong jaw, the intensity of his expression broken by his slight frown.
“What are these flyers for?” Ethan set the snow globe back on the counter, picked one up, then stared at the words.
Releasing her breath, Holly refocused on what should be the most important thing to her right now—making an income to pay her bills. “It’s an advertisement for a holiday home-decorating service for people who are too busy to do it themselves this time of year.”
“That’s an interesting concept.” Ethan looked around the store pensively. An awkward moment passed between them as another Christmas carol filled the air. “Will it bring in enough money for you to get caught up?”
Holly found herself staring back into Ethan’s blue eyes and felt a current threatening to pull her under. She floundered, trying to free herself from its grasp. Ethan Pellegrino confused her. She shrugged to relieve the tension building in her shoulders and arms. “Honestly? I have no idea, but I have to try.”
The wind kicked up beyond the glass door, which protected them from the cold, even though the temperature seemed to drop inside. She shivered and pulled her black sweater tighter. Snow started to accumulate on the lawn across the street. Maybe she’d close up shop early and try to make it home once Cameron arrived from school. It wasn’t as if she’d have much business this afternoon anyway, and they could take care of the flyers anywhere.
Ethan scraped his good hand through his hair and contemplated his next move. What was another month in the scheme of things? The thirty-six-hundred dollars was just a drop in the bucket of what he needed to operate his dog sanctuary, bring rescued dogs over from Afghanistan and introduce them to, or in some cases reunite them with, their new owners. “You can stay until the end of the year.”
How could he kick her out before Christmas? Not only would he have a hard time reconciling that with God, Ethan also had his mom to contend with. She wouldn’t take too kindly to him evicting the woman during the holidays.
“Thank you.”
Ethan looked away from Holly’s open expression and soft, feminine features to stare at the scars on his hand where his fingers used to be. He’d been one of the lucky ones. Along with the chaplain he was assigned to protect, two of his other comrades in the convoy in Afghanistan had been killed; one of them had been a father and the other a newlywed.
Why the Lord chose those three to die mystified Ethan. If anyone should have been called home, it should have been him. Nobody depended on him or needed him. If anything, he needed someone else since returning home from rehab. Buttoning a shirt and learning to write with his left hand continued to challenge him. Determination forced its way past the dissatisfaction as he shifted and flexed his injured hand. God had a plan for him, and it revolved around the new canine shelter.
“It’s not a problem.” Ethan would find the money owed from the rent elsewhere, especially since in his gut, he knew Holly wouldn’t ever get caught up. Someone said charity began at home. Well, right now this was as close to home as he was going to get. He could still advertise for a renter, but with the three other storefronts available along the main square, it might take a while. As long as Holly made her utilities, what difference was it going to make? Peace settled inside him as he feigned interest again in the snow globe.
Dark blond hair fell to her shoulders and framed her pale face, accentuating the dark circles under her green eyes. The black sweater she clutched around her only made her appear more fragile, as did the fact she barely came up to his shoulder. A light dusting of freckles endeared her to him more than he was comfortable with.
The woman looked as if she needed a break right now. The urge to shelter and protect her almost brought him to his knees. While his stint as an army chaplain’s assistant had come to an end, he couldn’t help who he was. He needed to think of something else.
“So your last name is Stanwyck. I knew a Jared Stanwyck. Any relation?”
When Holly nodded, his hope chose a quick exit.
“My late husband.”
His mom had told him about Jared’s car accident a few years back, but she’d failed to mention he’d left behind a wife and son. Another reason he couldn’t evict her any sooner than the end of the year. “I’m sorry for your loss.”
“Thanks. How did you know him?”
At her lost expression, his heartbeat accelerated. He picked up the carved wooden ornament sitting by the cash register. It was better than the similar one Jared had done in high school during shop class, but he’d recognize the talent anywhere. “We grew up a few blocks from each other and played ball together in school, but pretty much lost touch after graduation. I went into the military. He went to Northern Arizona University.” He stared at her and then his injured hand. “If anyone... Never mind. I see Jared’s work got better.”
“It did. I used to have a lot of his stuff here, but it’s all sold, except for one of his earlier pieces. I’m sorry for your loss, as well.”
“Thanks.” Ethan put the figurine back down and his attention strayed to the empty fireplace along the wall, where she’d hung a few stockings, with more placed in the nook built beside it. The store had a pleasant feel and smell to it. As soon as he finished with the dog areas, he could use some advice on how to decorate the reception area he had in mind for Beyond the Borders Dog Sanctuary so it would look nice when he welcomed owners either dropping off or picking up their dogs.
He sniffed in the scent of cinnamon and listened to the sound of another Christmas carol coming over the speakers behind the counter. Lights twinkled on various-size fake trees, each pine with its own different theme. Larger ornaments interspersed with snowflakes hung from the ceiling, and wreaths of all sizes hung on the walls. Shelves lined the back walls, but even from here, Ethan could see they lacked merchandise.
He sensed Holly was in more financial distress than just behind in her rent and wondered if she was even going to make it through the holidays. The closer he inspected the store, the more gaps he found on the trees, shelves and walls. Would her last-ditch effort to set up decorations for other people work?
He hoped so. Even though he needed the rent money for his shelter, it wouldn’t be coming from here. He’d already made up his mind and couldn’t immediately evict his friend’s widow. What a mess. He refocused on the snow globe with the Santa figure. Picking it up, he shook it again, creating a flurry of activity inside. The turbulence suited his mood.
“How much is this?”
“Twenty-four ninety-nine. I have others if you’d like to see them. They’re right this way.”
Holly had no idea why she prolonged Ethan’s visit. She should be shooing him out the door so she could free herself from his closeness and plan her going-out-of-business strategy before Cameron showed up. Somehow she knew Ethan wasn’t quite ready to leave yet, and all of a sudden she wanted his company to chase away the loneliness inside the shop.
Staring at the shelf along the back wall that contained what was left of her snow-globe merchandise, she wondered why the pretty glass orbs were her favorites. Was it because of the intricate work inside? The bright colors in some, the muted colors in others? The idea that each time she shook up the make-believe snow, she created a new scene?
She picked up one with a happy family opening presents on Christmas morning inside. Turning the key on the bottom, she wound the music box, shook the globe and set it back on the shelf, the strains of “We Wish You a Merry Christmas” keeping time with the swirling snow.
Ethan stirred next to her. He obviously wasn’t comfortable with her choice, either.
He picked up one containing the manger scene. Ethan fumbled for a moment as he tried to turn the crank on the bottom to listen to the music inside, but without his fingers, the task was impossible until he flipped it into his injured hand and used the good one to start the music.
“What happened to your hand?”
Disgust, sadness and resignation flickered through his eyes as he looked at her, but his expression remained immobile. Holly forgot to breathe. In that quick instant his pain was her own—the death of a dream, a shattered life struggling to mend, a man trying to continue on as if nothing had happened, and yet in a flash everything had changed.
She knew it well. “I’m sorry. Forget that I asked.”
“It’s okay, Holly. You’re not the first to ask and you won’t be the last.” Setting the snow globe back down on the shelf, Ethan pulled up the sleeve of his dress shirt, exposing more scarring that went to his elbow. “It looks a lot better than it did a few months ago. I served as an army chaplain’s assistant in Afghanistan.”
“What’s that?” Holly never took her eyes off the man’s arm. She wasn’t repulsed, but she wasn’t comfortable, either. Some people wore their scars on the outside, others on the inside and others in both ways.
“I was a bodyguard to whatever chaplain I was assigned to. This time it was a pastor, but I’ve protected rabbis and priests. We were heading out from our base camp when our convoy encountered a roadside IED. I was one of the lucky ones. The chaplain and two soldiers were killed along with two innocent civilians.”
“What’s an IED?”
“Improvised explosive device. It’s technical words for a bomb.”
“I’m so sorry. That must have been horrible for you.” Holly knew there was more to the story than just the spoken words, yet she dared not ask. Having closed off her emotions after Jared’s death, Holly refused to let them open up again.
“I saw a lot of horrible things over there.” Ethan looked as if he wanted to say more about that subject, but his expression closed again and she could almost see his thoughts shift. She braced herself for the next topic of why he was in the store. “Now, about the garage. I’ll expect Cameron at eight.”
“That works for me, but Cameron will be a bit testy that early in the morning.”
“He’s almost a teenager. I wouldn’t expect anything less. It will be good for him.” Ethan cracked a smile and studied the manger inside the snow globe again. “I’ll take this one.”
“But you don’t have to buy anything.”
“I don’t have to—I want to.” Back at the counter, he handed her his credit card, giving Holly her fourth transaction of the day. It wouldn’t meet her overhead, but it would help cover something. When she went to wrap it up, he put his good hand on her arm, causing her heart to flutter. “It’s a gift for you. We all have troubles, Holly. Sometimes it helps to know that we don’t have to carry them alone.”
Chapter Two
What had Ethan been thinking? Holly needed money, not a manger scene inside a snow globe. The irony that they were both in the same position but for different reasons would have struck him as funny if things weren’t so complicated. Somehow, though, the action seemed right. For a moment, he saw behind her mask of exhaustion and fear and glimpsed the beautiful, caring, compassionate and vulnerable woman underneath.
The kind of woman Jared would fall for. He could, too, if that was what he wanted.
But wanting to protect her when he had to be part of her problem? Sure, he hadn’t been the cause of her financial woes, but deep down he knew that being behind in her bills bothered her and he felt like a cad. His mom would have never gone over there and asked for the back rent. As soon as he met Holly Stanwyck, he knew he wasn’t going to get it from her. Even if she did somehow come up with it, he wasn’t sure he would take it and hoped her idea for the holiday decorating service panned out because she needed money.
The woman also needed some divine intervention right now. He’d add her to his prayers tonight and ask his mother to do the same. Knowing Nan, though, Holly was already on the list.
He slammed his car door shut. As a career soldier forced out because of his injuries, he’d never make it in the civilian world if he didn’t toughen up. Right. He was just a big softy, regardless of which side he was on. He’d always had pieces of candy in his pocket for the Afghan children and biscuits for the stray dogs. Now he was opening a sanctuary for dogs to stay while their owners served on foreign soil and to help transport stray dogs adopted by servicemen overseas and reunite them stateside.
Head down to keep the lingering snowflakes from his eyes, and hands bunched inside his coat pockets, he headed toward home and the kennels in the enclosed porch of his house in town that he used as the temporary sanctuary. The permanent one was going to be at his family’s farmhouse outside of town, but it needed to be refurbished before he could take the dogs out there. He needed money to do that; some of it he’d hoped to get from Holly. Now he’d have to look elsewhere, since his disability checks barely covered anything.
The lemon scent of cleaner and varied barks greeted him when he walked through the double French doors off the back porch.
“How’d it go?” Meredith, his cousin and fellow board member of Beyond the Borders Dog Sanctuary, greeted him.
“As well as I suspected. There won’t be any funds coming from the store anytime soon.”
“I’m sorry to hear that. Holly’s such a nice woman. She’s just had a lot to deal with lately.”
Ethan didn’t bother to mention the incident with the garage door, seeing as he suspected Meredith was the one who had leaked the eviction information to the wrong person. He loved his cousin, but after being away so long, he’d forgotten her fondness for spreading gossip.
“Anything new with the little girl?” Ethan changed the subject. He didn’t want to think about Holly anymore, or the tangible energy that had made the short hairs on the back of his neck stand at attention when his hand grazed hers as he gave her the snow globe. Meredith sat inside the kennel, stroking the little black-and-white mutt’s head, and he saw the bandages covering both front legs where the dog had licked away all her fur.
“Pudding Cup will be fine. It’s just nerves. She misses her mom.”
“How about the big guy I brought in to Tim?” He’d found the injured stray mix huddled on the side of the road yesterday, and it reminded him of one of the dogs their patrol had rescued from the cruelty of an Afghan family. He couldn’t ignore the mutt and had thoughts about keeping him, despite the fact Ethan needed to stick to his mission statement. There were other shelters in the area that took in homeless and abandoned dogs.
“He’s going to be just fine. Tim thinks he’s found a home for him already, so he said not to worry about the bill.” Meredith was engaged to the local veterinarian, who also sat on the board and was willing to take care of any of their animals for cost.
“I’ll have to stop by and thank him.” And make sure the animal was going to a good home. Okay, so he was a sucker for dogs and kids and apparently widows behind on their rent.
Ethan rubbed his hand across his stubbly chin. “Anything else?”
“Yep.” Meredith rose to her feet, causing Pudding Cup to whimper and follow her to the gate. “Another stray is being shipped over from Afghanistan, courtesy of your buddy Phil, along with the other one. Duggan and Jasper arrive Saturday, as do two more dogs on Wednesday. Their owners ship out next Friday.”
“Great.” Ethan wiped the snowflake residue from his face. His six temporary accommodations were more than full. With four more dogs coming in, he would be over capacity at seven, even though the two from Afghanistan would only be temporary until he could reunite them with their owners, who’d arrived home from their tour of duty last month. He could spill out into his living room, but he’d be over the limit and need a kennel license that much sooner. “Where am I going to put them?”
“Whose brilliant idea was it to provide a home for displaced animals when their owners left?”
“Mine, and you know it’s a good one. It’s one less thing for our local service men and women to think about while they’re doing their tour. Most are fortunate to have family to take care of them, but not all.” Ethan had started his studies to be a lay minister and had often counseled some of the enlisted men when the need arose. Leaving their pets behind ranked pretty high up there behind family, especially when they had to dump their companion in a shelter.
Being distracted could get a person killed. He knew that firsthand.
He stared at the nubs on his hand and tried to feel the forgiveness. The emotion refused to come. Five people died that day, and he wrestled with the guilt. Despite the fact he was assigned to protect the chaplain, he felt a responsibility to everyone he traveled with. He should have seen the IED. He knew the signs to look for. A strange vehicle on the side of the road, the wink of light reflecting off the camera lens set up to film the incident, the uneasy feeling harbored inside his gut because of the delay in getting the convoy started.
