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Good question. “Let’s see. She doesn’t fit in with what I want in life, who I am. She’s more like Luke—unpredictable, headstrong.” And makes me feel just as unpredictable. Out of control.
“She’s gorgeous.”
“She works in a bar.”
“Ah, a hard worker.”
Jacob stared hard at the bookshelves, cataloging the shapes and colors of the books but not the titles. “She kept my son a secret.”
“So she panicked and made a mistake. You enjoyed being with her before. What’s the real problem?”
Could he let his guard down? Even a little? Jacob was used to his brothers confiding in him, not the other way around. “I just— Before, it was easy. But she’s right. I kept her compartmentalized so I wouldn’t have any interference in my life.” He ran his hand across his close-cropped hair. “It had nothing to do with only wanting her for sex and everything to do with making our relationship convenient for me.”
“Relationships are anything but convenient. I’m learning to roll with it because the good far outweighs everything else.”
Jacob felt a moment of envy. Inflexibility seemed to have been bred into him. Strict adherence to standards and procedures served him well in business, not so much in relationships. At least, the few he’d had. He rarely saw a woman more than a handful of times, since he wasn’t ready for the long-term thing yet. Maybe not for several more years.
KC had taken him off guard. He could admit to himself that he’d kept her compartmentalized in his life because he’d been afraid—afraid of her taking over, afraid of losing control, afraid of being ruled by emotions instead of his brain.
I want another chance at that woman. No. “She’s my son’s mother. Better to stay close and know your enemy, right?”
Aiden’s smirk took him by surprise. “Jacob, the last time I fell for that line, I ended up married to the woman who changed my life, my way of thinking, forever. For the better, but still...”
“Not me.”
Aiden’s expression screamed famous last words, but Jacob ignored it. Aiden had vowed at eighteen never to return to Blackstone Manor—now he was happily married and living here full-time, with frequent business trips to New York to manage his art import/export business.
Would Jacob end up the same? Moving home was definitely the right choice, especially since his son was now here. But married? Not to KC. As exciting as being with her was, he wanted peace, not unpredictability.
“Jacob.”
The serious tone in Aiden’s voice cut through Jacob’s confusion. “Yeah?”
“What are you going to do about KC? About the baby?”
“Carter,” he said, clearing his throat when it tried to close. “Forcing her to give him to me would probably lead to a legal battle—and prove me to be a jackass. She might not have a lot of money, but she won’t give him up without a fight.” He frowned. “The bigger question is, what is she gonna do about me?”
Aiden thought for a moment. “Do you want her?”
“I do, but I told you, she’s not right—”
“Sometimes things don’t come the way we plan.”
And Jacob had been planning his entire life. He didn’t know if he could give that up.
“I can’t walk away. He’s my son.” Deep down he cringed at the hypocrisy of speaking as if memories of those incredible nights together had no influence on Jacob’s desire to see KC again.
“Then you need to be very careful...for you and for them.”
Jacob glanced over. “What do you mean?”
“I mean what’s going on at the mill. We still haven’t figured out who’s trying to sabotage our business, and until we do, nobody associated with us is safe. Delaying shipments and messing with customers’ orders is annoying, but what happened to Christina last year could have killed her. She wasn’t the target, but that doesn’t change the result.”
Jacob remembered all too well the night a group of thugs had set Aiden’s studio on fire...with Christina inside. The incident was one of many suspicious events at the Blackstones’ cotton mill, but it had escalated the game to a whole new level. “You think they might target my son?”
“Not on purpose, but then again...” Aiden leveled a look at him, sending unease running over Jacob’s nerve endings. “It would be for the best to keep the connection quiet. For now.”
“Right.” For now. Jacob had a lot of experience keeping things quiet in this town.
“So get control, before someone else does.”
Like KC. Jacob had been irritated and fascinated at the baby store. Until she’d burst in and started making demands, he hadn’t known what it would be like to have all that feistiness turned on him as a weapon. His whole body had lit up inside. At this rate, she’d have the upper hand in no time. Leading him about by the nose, or rather, another appendage he’d just as soon keep under control.
Jacob was grateful when Aiden moved on, pulling him back out of his convoluted thoughts.
“Back to business,” Aiden said. “I had a call from Bateman at the mill right before Canton arrived.”
Jacob had had a call, too, but he’d let it go to voice mail. He’d been too keyed up from his clash with KC to make sense of business.
A problem he never had.
Deflating like a balloon, Jacob dropped into one of the chairs facing the desk, grateful Aiden had replaced the old leather-and-wood chairs with cozy wing backs. His brother and sister-in-law were slowly updating things in Blackstone Manor—especially the study—inch by inch scraping away the depressive stench of their grandfather’s manipulation to reveal the true beauty of a home that had stood for generations in the face of natural and man-made tribulations.
“I just don’t know how to get a handle on the problems at the mill,” Jacob said, reminding them both of the year they’d spent dealing with the saboteur. “We need to find another way of catching this guy. I mean, I’m there every day, but I’m in management. And no one’s talking to me. We need someone on the floor, someone relatable. I think that’s where the problem is.”
“Definitely can’t be either of us. See if Bateman can put you in touch with someone over there to help. He’ll know who’s trustworthy.”
“Right.” His foreman had already been very helpful. Because Jacob wasn’t capable of judging anyone at the moment. Business would give him something to focus on besides KC, just as soon as they settled on some ground rules.
Start as you mean to go on, his mother had always said. For everyone involved, that was exactly what they needed to do.
* * *
As she faced off with Jake on her front porch, KC knew she was simply delaying the inevitable, but she couldn’t stop herself from arguing just for the sake of it. “What if my mom wasn’t here to watch Carter?”
KC spoke with no real hope of making a dent in Jacob’s thinking but couldn’t resist pointing out the inconvenience he was putting everyone through. Everyone but him. She hated the push-pull of her emotions. Wanting to keep him at arm’s length, yet greedy for even a little bit of his attention. When he’d finally called after two days of silence, her heart had sped up, but she couldn’t help being contrary about his sudden demand for her to take a Sunday drive with him.
“If we’re going to do this, there will be ground rules,” he said now as he waited impatiently on her doorstep. “That means we need to talk. Alone.”
That take-charge tone shouldn’t send shivers down her arms but it did. “Yes, we should,” she conceded. “But you still could’ve given me a heads-up sooner.”
She took her time walking back to the nursery. Not that she had anything important to do on Sunday mornings. Her mother usually came over before lunch for some downtime with Carter since Lola’s wasn’t open. Sometimes KC ran a few errands. Then they had family dinner with Grandma. Asking her mother to stay with Carter for a little while was really a formality, but it also wouldn’t hurt Jacob to wait on her porch a few minutes, just for giggles and grins.
Her pokiness had her changing into jeans and pulling her hair into a ponytail, but she simply refused to hurry. He didn’t comment when she finally came outside, just held the door for her to climb into his Tahoe and closed it with a firm hand.
The contained atmosphere of Jacob’s SUV didn’t settle her nerves. The interior smelled like him—spicy and dark. If she closed her eyes and breathed deep, she could almost remember what it felt like to have that scent all over her and wish she didn’t ever have to wash it away. After all, she never knew when she might smell it again.
After she’d left, been away from him for a while, she realized how sad it was to need someone so badly and yet be relegated mostly to a physical relationship. They said men did it all the time—obviously Jake had—but KC had never felt more alone than when she was lying in his arms, wishing she was good enough for him to make her a true part of his life.
The door opened and Jacob slid into his seat with his phone pressed to his ear. “I’m on my way,” he said as he reached for his seat belt. Without explanation he stowed the phone in the center console. Then he put the Tahoe in gear and pulled out of KC’s driveway, all without telling her where they were going or what this was about.
“You said something about ground rules?” she prompted.
Jacob maintained a still silence for several minutes more, at odds with the hum of the tires on asphalt. “I’ve made it clear what I want—”
“Actually, you haven’t.”
He shot a glance at her.
“Well, you haven’t,” she insisted. “Are you trying to get Carter full-time? Not that I’d let you have custody, but still...do you want him part-time? Have you thought about how that will work, how it will affect him? Do you—?”
“Enough, KC.”
His deep frown had her second-guessing her pushiness, but she wouldn’t apologize for trying to protect her son.
“I started making demands because I was angry. Unlike you, I didn’t get to think about this, plan for this, nothing. So I reacted out of emotion.” The heavy sound of his breath was her clue to how much self-control he was exerting.
A part of her, the wounded part, wanted to push him. Make him acknowledge that she and Carter would have a big place in his life—something he hadn’t found important enough to offer her before. Another part of her wanted to see that legendary control smashed to teeny-tiny pieces.
Just the way it had when they were in bed together. But as soon as the sex had been done, he’d been back in form—charming and attentive but perfectly capable of walking away.
“We have to do what’s best for Carter,” he said, staring straight out the windshield. “So how do we do that?”
“Let me get to know you.”
“To what end? What are we striving for here, KC?” He ran a rough hand over his smooth chin. In the time she’d known him, she’d never once seen him with stubble. “Because if you think you can disappear with him if you don’t like what you learn, that’s not an option. I will always find you.”
But for all the wrong reasons. “My family is here, Jacob,” she countered. “It didn’t take me long to realize that running is not a safe, long-term option. I made a mistake—one I won’t repeat. But I’d better like what I see, because unlimited access to your son is on the line.” She shifted against the leather seat, wondering if she could back up her big words with action.
“Look,” she said. “I don’t want us to spend our time trying to guard against each other. If this is truly about Carter—” she ignored Jake’s look “—then we need to work together. I tried to do things your way before and got nowhere. So this really is all on you. Show me what you’re like out of bed so I can see where Carter and—” I. Carter and I. She cleared her throat, grateful she hadn’t finished that sentence out loud. “Where Carter fits. Prove to me that he’s in good hands with you.”
“So what is it I’m supposed to do to show you I’m a good man? Hell, even I don’t know if I’m a good father. I’ve never been one before. Is this a written exam? A field test?”
“Oh, it’s a field test, all right. No more secrets, Jacob.”
He shot her a quick glance. “Are you seriously saying you didn’t learn anything about me in the months we were together? Why don’t you tell me what you do know and I’ll fill in the blanks.”
All the memories of their time together flooded her mind—long nights, laughter and loving... No. Not loving. The thought created an urge to get under his skin in the only way she knew how.
She shifted as close to him as her seat belt would allow. “Well,” she said, reaching out a fingertip. “I know you’re sensitive here.” She brushed gently back and forth along the outer edge of his ear, then down along his jawline. “I know you shave early and often because you don’t like looking scruffy.” The back of her hand rubbed down along his throat, then up along his collarbone. “I know your favorite sexual position is missionary because it gives you the most control—”
“What do you want to know?” Jacob interrupted, his voice deep and rough.
She leaned back in her seat, trying to cover her smile of satisfaction. Torturing him had always been fun. “What do you do—I mean, really do? What do you care about? Enjoy? Do you plan on staying here for longer than just the time it takes to get the mill on track?”
“What about you?” he asked, countering a question with a question.
“What do you mean?”
“The same questions apply to you,” he said, turning the Tahoe into a nearby parking lot so he could face her. “This won’t be a one-way street, KC.”
Yes, her sins would haunt her forever. She should never have kept Carter from Jake.
His gaze held her immobile as he spoke. “I’m not the only one paying for my mistakes,” he said, leaning closer, crowding her until her heart fluttered in panic. “We’re gonna be seeing a lot of each other.”
“I’m sure,” she said with a nod, trying to get a handle on her nerves.
His gaze dropped to her lips as she licked them, reminding her of things she was better off forgetting. The space around them closed in before he spoke. “The thing is, with your history, I’m now questioning every word from these pretty lips.”
She had no warning when his thumb came up to rub back and forth across her mouth. It affected her more than she wanted to admit, and left her dreaming of more.
“Consequences, KC. Those are my terms.”
Her lips firmed, and she had a feeling she’d adopted the stubborn look she was known to turn on disruptive customers. Jacob simply smiled, then pulled back and got them on the road again.
“Well,” she said, a little stumped, “my life is pretty simple, as you saw before. My job, my time revolves around my family.”
“They’re supportive? Of you and Carter?”
Her heart jumped at the softening of his voice as he said their son’s name. “Definitely. Our family is very close. And my grandmother, mother and brother love Carter unconditionally.”
Even if their new connection to the Blackstone family scared her mother no end. KC rubbed her palms against her jean-covered thighs, searching for more words. “What about your family?” She swallowed hard, distracted by thoughts of her friend Christina, a true Blackstone now. She would be so mad when she realized KC had kept the truth about Carter from her. “Did you tell them?”
“I guess you’ll see,” Jacob said, then turned the truck abruptly into a construction area.
With a start, KC realized they were at the site of the new playground Aiden Blackstone had raised money to build on the south end of town. The large field had been cleared and leveled, with concrete slabs laid in various areas to anchor the equipment. Current construction seemed to center around a two-story fort at the far end.
There, a group of people stood to one side while a handful of construction workers drilled to secure the platforms. “Do they know we’re coming?” she asked.
“They knew I was coming,” Jacob said. “You’ll just be the bonus.”
Yeah, right.
Jacob settled his palm on the door’s handle, then spoke while staring straight ahead. “And for the record, my favorite position isn’t missionary. It’s you on top.”
KC swallowed hard. That revelation held her in place for longer than she liked. Her mind wandered back to all the times—no. No time for that now.
She’d be better off remembering all the times he’d left her to go back to Philadelphia with rarely a call between trips. KC scrambled out of the car, ignoring Jacob’s frown. He’d always liked to open the door for her, and she’d trained herself to wait for him. It had been hard for a girl who’d always taken care of herself, but she’d done it because it made him happy. And deep down, because it made her feel special. Letting him do it now would be too big of a reminder of those precious moments.
As she followed at a slight distance behind him across the open lot, KC wished there was at least one happy face in the crowd. She recognized the newlywed couple as they approached, and neither looked very welcoming.
Yep, the news of Carter’s parentage had spread.
Jacob introduced her to his brother, but Christina stepped in before he could go further. “We know each other,” she said quietly. “Hey, KC.”
KC couldn’t read her friend’s tone or expression. They’d been very close before KC left, often hanging out in the same group of women. But she, Christina and their friend Avery Prescott had formed a tight bond through community work that hadn’t been weakened by their different social statuses. KC had told them she was moving away for a job, and other than some chance encounters, she hadn’t tried to renew her bond with the women since she’d returned.
All it would have taken was one of them to figure out who Carter’s father was, and they all would have known. Living and working in Blackstone Manor—and now married to the Blackstone heir—Christina posed a danger to KC. She hadn’t wanted to risk anything until she had all her ducks in a row.
