Юрий Низовцев.

Sneers on a palm or the absurd ridicule



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Sneers on a palm or the absurd ridicule


Part I. Fresh pranks


Why all are going to the zoo?

To admire by itself in development.


Why love to caress cats?

For lack of more worthy object.


Whether understands parrot own chatter?

Only partly, but he likes it, and he is not stopping soon.


What special quality of the real housewives are the best?

By their richness – like the bun.


Where to now sit thieves?

Everywhere.


Why beggars have such look of suffering?

They always consider that they are given a little.


There is «Manneken Pis» (A pissing boy) in Brussels. And what is at us?

We may piss anywhere.


How the spirit is strengthened not so bad?

By acquisition of boots with foot bindings.


What a stick is good in?

It is possible to force down with its help not only pears.


What do cornered people make?

Japanese – Hara-kiri;

Russian – drunkenness;

American – business;

German – the order;

The Frenchman – champagne;

Englishman – soccer;

Chinese – a kite;

The Hindu – nirvana;

Jew – a sell.


Why the monkeys any more do not turn into people?

They had seen enough on them.


Why in the Russian language, almost all words are borrowed?

Apparently, Russians learned to speak later all.


Whether so really the person is perfect?

It is possible to learn it, having looked at a fly creeping on a ceiling.


Why do people trust the deceivers?

And why husband believes to wife?


Who occurs from a cow?

Exclusively good-natured persons, but in insufficient quantity.


What the bald head can be useful for?

For additional lighting of the space.


What is better to drink?

What into a throat flows and it is not being spillt.


How are combined boiling water and crayfish?

Just as boiling water and people, up to reddening.


What cheap cologne beats expensive perfume in?

It replaces vodka at an extreme.


For what pants are necessary?

To cover, inasmuch their opening does not make a contribution to science.


When women begin to get smarter?

Some – already after fifty.


Where did nudists undertake from?

From sin, that they do not hide.


From what a goose to a pig is not a comrade?

From the different feeding troughs.


Whether will triumph of validity?

When the cancer shall start to whistle at mount.


How to become rich?

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