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Before she stepped out, she glanced over her shoulder. “I won’t go far, Claire. You need anything, you holler, hear?”
“I will.”
After she and Charlotte disappeared into the hallway, Alex came around to stand at the side of Claire’s bed. “What was that all about?” He jerked his head toward the door. “Lucille acts like she’s afraid to leave you alone with me.”
“It’s not that. She’s just worried about me.”
“Well, I’m glad to hear it.” He sat on the edge of the bed. “I know she’s never been my biggest fan, but I’d hate her to think that you’re afraid of me.”
“She doesn’t think anything of the sort. But I still don’t understand why you’re here, Alex. You could have called to find out how I’m doing.”
His amiable smile faltered. “Like I said, I wanted to see for myself that you’re okay.”
“I appreciate your concern, but I’m not your responsibility anymore.”
“Not my responsibility?” His lips pinched together as he stared down at her. “You think I can just turn off my feelings because you want me to? You think I’ll stop caring just because you’re divorcing me?”
“We both agreed to the divorce.”
“Because you left me no other choice. It’s not what I want and you know it.”
Claire stared at the ceiling. Why was she letting him get to her like this? Their marriage was over. The decision had been made and it was time to move on. Time to pull the plug on all her guilt. “I don’t want to do this. Not now.”
“I don’t want to do this, either. I didn’t come down here to fight with you, Claire. It scared the hell out of me when I heard what happened to you.”
“I’m sorry you were worried.”
“Nothing to be sorry about. I’m just glad you weren’t seriously hurt.” He took her hand and squeezed it. “Why don’t you tell me what happened?”
“Are you asking as a cop?”
“Just humor me, Claire.”
She slipped her hand from his. “Didn’t Charlotte fill you in on the details?”
“Her account was pretty sketchy. She said you stepped in front of a car, but I have to believe there’s more to the story than that.”
“Not really. It was an accident. I wasn’t looking where I was going and I ran out in front of a car. It was my fault.”
“What about the doll she said you saw in a shop window?”
Claire heard the edge in his voice and turned her head to the window so that she wouldn’t have to see his face. Raindrops ran down the glass in tiny rivers. She watched one of the streams split in two and slide off in separate directions. “You don’t really want to hear about the doll,” she said quietly.
He sighed. “No, I probably don’t, but why don’t you tell me about it anyway?”
Claire kept her gaze focused on the window. “She looks exactly like Ruby.”
“Claire.” He said her name so tenderly her eyes welled with tears. “Why are you doing this?”
“I’m not doing anything.” Her voice trembled in spite of her resolve. “You asked about the doll and I’m telling you what I saw.”
“You can’t keep tormenting yourself this way.”
“That’s not what I’m doing, and even if I am, it’s no longer your concern. Just forget it, Alex.”
“Like hell I will.” He got up from the bed and strode over to close the door. When he turned back, Claire could see the anger and frustration on his face. “Let me ask you something. When was the last time you spotted a kid that you thought looked like Ruby?”
Claire remembered the girl she’d seen on the street earlier, and lifted her chin. “This is different.”
“Different than what? The one you saw on the playground that you took pictures of? Different than the time you followed another little girl and her mother home from the mall? You thought she looked exactly like Ruby, too. So you got out of your car and beat on their front door until the poor woman became so frightened she called the cops. If I hadn’t gotten wind of the situation, you would have been hauled in and booked.”
Claire listened to everything he said, and then she shrugged. “I don’t care what you think, this is different. I know what I saw.”
He shook his head, at a loss. “I don’t know what to do anymore. I don’t know how to help you.”
“You could try believing me.”
“That’s the one thing I can’t do. I can’t feed this obsession of yours, Claire. I won’t. Because I know how it’s going to turn out. You’ll get yourself all worked up again and then your heart’s going to be ripped open like it always is. I’ve seen it happen over and over, and this time won’t be any different. It’s been seven years. Seven damn years. You can’t spend the rest of your life grieving like this. You have to find a way to get over what happened.” He rubbed the back of his neck as he walked toward the window. “I don’t know, maybe you need to see someone.”
“I’ve been to a therapist. It didn’t solve anything.”
“Then maybe you need to find a different one. You have to do something.”
“I’m not crazy, Alex.”
“You will be if you keep this up. I don’t want you ending up like your old man.”
She gasped. “I would never do that!”
“I don’t want to believe it, either, but sometimes I have to wonder.” He stared out at the weather, his frustration collecting on his face like raindrops on the windowsill. “I see divorces in the department all the time. They’re as common as dirt. Cops just can’t seem to stay married. But most of the time it’s because of another woman or the lousy pay or because the wife gets sick of her man rolling around in the gutter before he comes home to her.” He shoved his hands into his pockets. “But none of those things were ever our problem, were they? What did us in was that what you had was never going to be as important as what you lost.”
“That’s not fair,” she said. “My daughter was kidnapped. That’s not something you ever get over.”
“I’m not talking about Ruby.”
The nerves in Claire’s stomach tightened and she closed her eyes briefly. “Don’t say it.”
His face went white with suppressed fury. “You mean I’m not even allowed to mention the son of a bitch’s name? Well, I don’t know why that should surprise me. From the moment he showed up on your doorstep the night we got married, I never stood a chance, did I, Claire?”
“That’s not true. Our problems had nothing to do with him. I haven’t even seen him in years.”
“When’s the last time you dreamed about him?”
She looked away, silent.
“You can’t even deny it, can you?” Alex scrubbed a hand down his face and drew a long breath. “Believe it or not, I didn’t come over here to start something with you, Claire. I just want to help you. That’s all I’ve ever wanted.”
“Then let me go,” she whispered.
“I wish I knew how to do that. I really do.”
Six
The child was enchanted by the dolls.
And the Dollmaker was enchanted by her.
Earlier, when he first got back from the city, he’d prepared a dinner tray and brought it down to the studio, deliberately leaving her door open to see if she would venture out. Then he’d gone over to his worktable, where he’d mounted a mirror on the wall so that he could watch the room behind him as he pretended to sketch.
After a few moments, he saw her hovering in the doorway. She was such a slight child. Waiflike, with her long, wavy hair and big brown eyes. He couldn’t take his own eyes off her.
She remained in the doorway, her gaze darting about the studio as she searched for a way out. His workbench was against the far wall, and the mirror was slanted in such a way that he could watch her discreetly. She didn’t see him at first as she took a tentative step into the room, her head turning first one way and then the other.
When she spotted him, her eyes widened and she started to retreat back into her dim little room. But she must have noticed that his back was to her, and her gaze flew to the outside door. She paused, as if trying to gauge the distance, and then, casting another furtive glance in his direction, she hurried over and twisted the knob.
The door was locked, of course. He’d made certain of that.
She tried the knob several times before finally giving up. Turning, she looked back at him, not knowing what to do.
He couldn’t get over how tiny she was. Much smaller at seven than Maddy had been. She wore blue jeans with elastic in the waist and a little yellow T-shirt with a mermaid on the front.
Her clothes were all wrong. Too casual for a little girl’s birthday party, but that didn’t matter. He would make her a new dress, something pink and frilly and utterly feminine. What mattered to him now were her features. The upturned nose, the heart-shaped mouth, the exquisite cheekbones. She was perfect. Or at least she would be very soon.
Several moments went by before the child saw the dolls. And then, for just a split second, the fear left her face and her brown eyes lit with wonderment. He couldn’t blame her. They were wonderful. Beautiful and charming, and he loved them, too.
Dressed in their finest, they were seated around a small, rectangular table, one at the end and two on either side. At the far end, the sixth chair stood empty. For now.
The Dollmaker had set the table with Maddy’s best tea set, and he’d made her favorite cake with strawberry icing. Her presents were piled on either side of her chair, as if waiting for tiny fingers to rip off the colorful bows and tear away the tissue paper.
The child stood transfixed by the scene. Her expression was rapt, and he swiveled around to watch her, but the movement startled her and she backed away.
“No, don’t go,” he said softly. “They’ve been waiting for you.”
Sliding off his stool, he walked over to the little table and knelt beside the doll with the turquoise eyes.
“This is Maddy. Today is her birthday.”
The little girl said nothing, but she didn’t try to run away. She was captivated by the dolls.
He went around the table and made the introductions, and when he finished, he motioned to the empty chair at the end. “Come join the party.”
The child shook her head. “I want to call my mama.”
“In a little while perhaps.”
“I want to go home.”
He sighed, his shoulders sagging dejectedly. “Please don’t be tiresome about this. Remember what happened the last time?”
The little girl flinched as fear crept back into her eyes, and her bottom lip trembled. Slowly she nodded.
“Then come sit down and have some cake.”
She walked over to the table and sat down at the empty space. A tear spilled over and ran down her cheek. She scrubbed it away with her knuckles.
“You’ll feel better after you eat.” He cut a piece of the strawberry cake and placed it on the table in front of her. Then he cut pieces for everyone at the table and one for himself. He sat cross-legged on the floor and ate, his gaze never leaving the child’s face.
At that moment he felt happier than he had in a long time. All that business in New Orleans was behind him now. Maddy was home safe and sound, and all was well in the private little world he’d created.
In spite of her tears, the child’s company made him almost euphoric. He loved having her companionship. He always did. But he couldn’t keep her here much longer. Once the doll was finished, he would have to send her away.
He wouldn’t worry about that now, though. He didn’t want to spoil the party. Besides, even after she was gone, a part of her would remain with him always. Just like the others.
And when they were all finally together, the way they were meant to be, no one would ever take them from him again.
Seven
After Alex left, Claire managed to convince Charlotte to go home for the night, but Lucille wouldn’t budge. “No kid of mine ever spent the night alone in a hospital, and I don’t see any reason to start now.”
“But, Mama, I’m fine. There’s no point in wearing yourself out.”
“Claire, terrible things can happen in a place like this.” Lucille’s eyes, small and unblinking, were dead serious. She sat in a chair next to the bed, shoes kicked off, feet propped on the mattress. Her toenails were painted bright red. The lacquer matched the lipstick she’d reapplied after her last cigarette, but the crimson had already started to bleed into the deep crevices around her mouth, giving her a grotesque appearance in the harsh lighting.
“Nothing is going to happen to me in the hospital, Mama.”
“You don’t know that. You’re at their mercy once they get you all doped up on morphine.”
“They didn’t give me any morphine.”
“Well, they gave you something for pain, didn’t they?” Lucille brushed stray ashes off the front of her T-shirt. “I ever tell you what happened to my cousin Corinne?”
“She got a staph infection from a contaminated needle.”
“That’s right, she did. The nurse dropped the syringe on the floor, picked it up and stuck it right in Corinne’s arm. Didn’t bother to wipe it off or nothing. Took twenty years, but that infection finally killed her.” Lucille’s birdlike eyes gleamed knowingly. “Now don’t you think Corinne wished someone had been watching out for her that day?”
“Yes, Mama.”
Lucille nodded in satisfaction. “You just close your eyes and get some rest. You don’t need to worry about a thing. I’ll be right here all night if you need me.”
Twenty minutes later, she was snoring softly, her head thrown back against the chair, mouth open. Claire wanted to wake her and send her home, but Lucille would swear she wasn’t a bit sleepy, she was just resting her eyes.
Turning off the light, Claire sat in the dark for a while, trying to sort through her emotions. Her nerves vibrated like a taut rubber band as the antiseptic walls closed in on her. A nurse had brought her something for the pain after Charlotte left, but the medication wasn’t working.
Slipping out of bed, Claire walked over to the window to watch the storm. Thunder rumbled overhead and the rain came down hard, blurring the city lights like a soft-focus filter.
And then just like that it was over. The storm moved farther inland, the rain stopped and moonlight broke through the clouds. The dripping treetops glistened and the lights from passing cars painted the glossy streets with misty streaks of color.
After the rain, ditches and backyards would come alive with the sounds of crickets and frogs, but inside Claire’s hospital room, all was silent except for Lucille’s soft snoring.
