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While keeping a sharp eye on everything she did.
The sooner she completed her task, the sooner she could be off his ship. And the sooner they could get back to business as usual. He could return to the uncomplicated existence he’d enjoyed for the past two years.
That was what he wanted.
Uncomplicated. Unhurried. A life doing what he’d come to love—spending his time in warm, tropical waters—with two of his best friends.
After the turmoil of the past sixteen years, he deserved a break.
Knox stared out across the vast expanse of open water. It was calm, smooth this far from any shore. It always managed to make him feel small and insignificant. For some people that might be frightening, but for Knox it was reassuring. Knowing that he was one teeny, tiny piece in a gigantic whole helped to take some of the pressure away. Not everything was his fault or responsibility.
Sometimes that lesson was difficult to remember.
As he usually did whenever the stars winked on for the first time at night and he happened to be in a position to see them, he looked up. Picking one out, he closed his eyes and murmured a few words to his big brother. About his life, his day—good and bad.
He was so caught up in the moment that he didn’t hear anyone approach until a soft voice murmured beside him.
“They’re beautiful, aren’t they?”
Jerking his gaze down, Knox stared for several seconds at Avery.
She wasn’t close. There was at least three feet of railing between them. Although it didn’t matter. His body reacted as if she’d whispered those words straight into his ear, as if the warmth of her breath had tickled across his skin.
Knox tamped down his reaction, controlling it as he’d learned to ruthlessly control everything else. Desire, just like pain, could be ignored.
And he had every intention of ignoring any reaction Dr. Walsh stirred within him.
At some point she’d changed clothes, probably into what she considered casual wear. Sure, she was in shorts, but they were linen and looked damned expensive. She’d paired them with a gauzy top in fading shades of blue and fussy sandals with straps that crisscrossed up her calves. And the damn pearls—although this strand was longer than the ones earlier, and swayed between her breasts.
She’d pulled her flame-red hair up into some kind of bun thing at the back of her head that managed to look both sophisticated and complicated. Not to mention tight enough to give her a headache. Knox just wanted to mess it up.
For the briefest moment, he contemplated whether or not to tell her a few strands had escaped the tight confines and were curling to trail down her neck and face. He decided not to, mostly because he knew she’d immediately try to tame them back.
As far as he was concerned, those wisps of red were the best thing about her outfit.
“What?” he finally asked when he realized he’d been staring at her a little too long.
“The stars, they’re gorgeous. It’s one of the best things about being on the open water. So bright. No matter where my family was, or how foreign our home felt, the stars were always the same. I could look up into the sky, and even from our first night in a new city or village, I’d feel centered.”
Her statement struck him as sad, wistful in a way that tugged at him. And curious.
“You moved a lot?”
She laughed, the sound soft and uneasy. “Every few months. My dad was an archaeologist but my parents liked having the family together, no matter how remote the location.”
Shifting her hips against the railing, Avery rested her weight there. She stared out across the quiet water.
Knox didn’t quite know what to do with this contemplative version of the woman he’d met. So he stayed silent and simply listened.
“My sister and I were homeschooled. My parents wanted the world to be our classroom, and I have to admit there were things about the experience I wouldn’t trade. But for someone who tended toward shyness, it became very difficult to dredge up the energy to make friends in each new place.”
Knox studied her, wary instincts clanging a warning deep inside his head. What was her angle? Was she playing him? Doling out information he hadn’t asked for in the hopes of tugging on his heartstrings—assuming he had any, of course?
Like any good intelligence officer, he let her continue in the hopes of discovering the answer to some or all of those questions.
“My sister and I would often wish on the first star of the night. But I suppose that would be too foolish for a big, bad Navy SEAL, huh?”
“Doc, I think you’ve got the wrong impression of me. There have been plenty of times in my life I would have prayed to wood nymphs, Aztec gods or, hell, Martians, if it meant saving lives. I believe in my training. I respect the brothers who fought beside me. And I’m wise enough to realize there are forces at work outside our control every single day. I value life and understand what’s important—people, not things.”
Her pale blue eyes jerked to his. “Interesting.”
“What?”
She shrugged. “Just not what I expected.”
Knox felt his lips curve down into a frown.
Slowly she cleared her throat, turning and folding her arms over the railing so she could stare down at the water churning beneath them. “Look, I think maybe we got off on the wrong foot.”
“Maybe?” There was no question they’d gotten off on the wrong foot.
“Hey, you’re the one who almost ran me over with that little car.”
“Doc, that wasn’t just any car. And she might be small, but she’s damn powerful.”
“And fast.”
Knox grinned. “And fast.”
He mirrored her position, sliding closer and folding his own arms over the railing.
“What’s so special about the car...aside from the fact that it came inches away from wearing me as a hood ornament?”
He could have rattled off a bunch of statistics, talked about the car’s racing history. Instead, Knox found himself saying, “First of all, like I told you that day, I was in complete control the entire time. You were never in any danger.”
“Excuse me if I don’t trust your judgment on that.”
Knox’s lips flashed up into a self-deprecating grin, the kind that acknowledged her statement and then immediately dismissed it. Because she was absolutely wrong. However, he was intelligent enough to realize that having this argument again wasn’t going to get either of them anywhere.
“But, more importantly, it’s my brother’s.”
Which wasn’t true since Kyle had never owned it, but Knox always thought of the car as his. It should have been his.
Kyle had talked about that car incessantly. Had put posters of the Shelby on his wall. Together, the two of them had planned to fix one up. His brother had even started saving.
Since Kyle hadn’t been able to follow through on the dream, in his spare time Knox had done it for him. It had been a labor of love, and of atonement. It was the least he could do since Kyle’s death had been his fault. That car was Knox’s single most prized possession.
The familiar guilt snaked through his chest, tightening everything to the point that he couldn’t breathe. It was a battle he’d fought for the past sixteen years. A battle that never seemed to get easier.
It didn’t matter that no one else blamed him for the accident that had killed his brother, his brother’s girlfriend and his best friend. He blamed himself and always would.
He should have done more. Not swerved to miss the deer that had jumped out onto the dark country road late that night. He should have been able to recover from the skid the car went into. Should have prevented the car from slamming into the guardrail at sixty miles an hour.
Everyone told him it was a miracle he’d walked away from the crash. And they weren’t wrong. He’d had several broken bones, a concussion and various cuts and bruises.
Bethany had died on impact. Chase minutes later on the side of the road. Kyle...he’d survived for several hours.
Knox would never forget standing beside his brother, watching EMTs try to save his life. The most helpless Knox had ever been. A sensation he never wanted to experience again.
“Your brother needs better taste in cars.”
Pushing away from the railing, Knox let his gaze sweep across Avery. “My brother’s dead,” he said, his words blunt and infused with every drop of remembered pain, even if he hadn’t meant to unleash it on her.
Avery’s pale eyes went wide and her mouth dropped open.
He should feel...something for pulling that kind of reaction. Satisfaction, at least. It was what he’d been going for with the stark statement.
Instead, he simply wanted away—from her and the unpleasant memories she’d unwittingly called up.
Turning, he walked in the opposite direction, leaving her with the pod of dolphins that had decided to ghost through the water with the ship.
* * *
KNOX’S WORDS RANG through her head. Okay, more like clanged. But how was she to know his brother was dead? Or that her question could cause that haunted, hunted look in his eyes?
She felt like crap, but there wasn’t much she could do about it. Apologize, but she’d really done nothing wrong. And something told her saying anything else would make the situation worse. It was obvious he didn’t want to talk about it.
She’d seen Knox standing at the railing looking up at the stars and had wanted to get things on track. She really needed Knox to...if not like her then at least leave her alone enough to do her job. Or not do her job.
At the thought, a heavy pit settled into her stomach. It made her sick. Instead of making things better, somehow she’d managed to irritate him more.
It was clearly time to regroup.
Avery headed back to her cabin. She’d been surprised to be assigned her own considering the lack of space, but it would make things easier. She was exhausted from traveling and her body was starting to crash from the ups and downs of the day.
She forced herself to unpack—the cases with her supplies and equipment had already been unloaded—putting all of her clothes away before beginning her nightly ritual. There was something about getting her space in order that always soothed her.
Maybe it was from all the years living out of suitcases. Or a holdover from trying to find a sense of security when the only thing she’d been able to control was her immediate environment.
Her father’s work had taken them to some amazing places—Africa, Egypt, Thailand, South America, Australia. She’d experienced different cultures. Could understand five languages, though she wasn’t fluent in all of them.
She now owned a house in Texas, but she spent more time away from it—consulting, working, giving speeches or preparing papers, occasionally teaching—than there. While she liked it well enough and always enjoyed going back, she wasn’t tied to home the way most people were.
Her routine grounded her, though. No matter where she laid her head, it was always the same. Brushing her teeth, taking off her makeup, preparing her clothes for the morning...
She could barely keep her eyes open by the time she switched off her light and crawled beneath the blanket. Tonight she didn’t even bother cracking open the book she’d brought with her. Instead, she was asleep within minutes.
And awake again two hours later when a loud noise startled her.
Avery jackknifed straight up in bed, her body responding before her brain had fully kicked in. With bleary eyes, she glanced around, trying to figure out where she was and what had woken her. It only took a few seconds to realize the disturbance had come from outside her room. On the Amphitrite.
Loud music. Laughter. Someone yelling.
And, there it was, the thump of some idiot slamming into the wall in the hallway outside her door.
Throwing a silk robe on over the cotton shorts and tank top she normally wore to bed, Avery yanked open her door just as another down the hall slammed shut. At least the drunken fool had made it to his bed.
But the noise. In the hallway it was so loud, the ship practically vibrated to the thump of the music.
She’d never get back to sleep.
With a huff, Avery tightened the knot on her robe and headed toward the commotion. A door down the hall stood wide-open. Inside it appeared the entire crew had congregated.
The space wasn’t huge. The ship was a working vessel, so most areas onboard were needed for their mission. It was clear this room served multiple purposes. The crew had eaten their dinner there earlier in the day. Now everyone was scattered about—lounging in chairs, sitting on top of tables, playing poker, drinking beer, listening to music.
Someone, she’d guess Catherine, their cook, had put out several bowls of munchies and a few dips.
Everyone’s faces were bright with happiness and laughter. She stood on the edge of the group and for a minute jealousy twisted her gut. She’d never had this, not even at college.
Especially not at college. She’d been too young and shy to really fit in with the other undergrads. Graduating high school early, she’d started college at sixteen.
By the time she’d reached grad school, she was so focused on her goals and burned-out that trying to fit in had seemed like a lost cause. She’d simply drawn into herself and set her sights on completing her program as soon as possible.
She had a few close friends now, but they were people like her. Quiet, professional, contained. When she was in Galveston, they’d get together for dinner, wine and some conversation. Nothing like this.
Avery’s gaze swept across the sea of people, most wearing shorts, T-shirts and flip-flops. There was nothing about this group that said contained.
They looked like they were relaxed. Enjoying themselves. A bright spurt of envy bloomed inside her chest.
Shaking off the unproductive reaction, Avery reminded herself why she’d ventured out. Scanning the crowd, she tried to find Asher. Maybe he’d be willing to tone down the party so she could sleep. He’d seemed like a nice enough guy the couple times they’d met.
But instead of finding him, her gaze locked with Knox’s. From across the room she felt the unexpected zing. Once she saw him, she couldn’t seem to look away, even though her brain was screaming at her to.
Pushing away from the table he’d been leaning against, Knox set his bottle on the scratched surface. Then he was striding across the room toward her. He didn’t have to say anything, the people between them simply moved out of his way.
“Welcome to the party. Have to say I’m surprised you joined us.” His dark eyes studied her. “In your silk robe.”
Avery fought the urge to grab the lapels and pull them tighter over her chest.
Luckily, his words jump-started her brain and reminded her exactly why she was there.
“Would you mind turning down the music? I’m trying to sleep and it’s very loud.”
“Sorry, doc. I promised the crew a party tonight since we’re going to be pulling twelve-and fourteen-hour days once we get to the site.”
The party. The music. The nickname. Having this man stare down at her out of those smooth brown eyes, delicious and warm...it was wreaking havoc with her brain. Why did she always have the impression Knox was judging her?
And why did it bother her so much that she was afraid he didn’t like what he saw?
