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‘The worst ever.’
There was silence for a moment. Steven stared into the fire reflectively. ‘One of the reasons we bought this house was that we thought it was a fine family home. It has five bedrooms and we planned to fill them. Stephanie was from a big family and so am I. We both liked that and wanted the same…’
‘I’m so sorry, Steven.’
The gentle sympathy of her voice jerked him from his contemplation of the past. He shrugged. ‘Life goes on, Chloe. I’ve learnt to deal with it.’
Despite the calm tone, she knew that he had found his wife’s death very difficult to come to terms with. Chloe had joined the company almost twelve months after the tragedy and she was used to a rather stern and very intense boss who could be more than a little aloof on occasion, but other members of staff had told her that before his wife had died he had been a different man, that her death had made him withdraw into himself.
Sitting here next to the fire with him, she realised that she was seeing more of that real Steven Cavendish than she had in two whole years in the office. Underneath that enigmatic cloak that he wore so well, he was a nice guy. A nice guy who just happened to be very handsome as well…she thought as she studied his rather aristocratic profile, the chiselled features, square jaw-line and the sensual curve of his lips.
He glanced over and caught her staring at him. ‘What are you thinking about?’ he asked lazily.
‘Just…just how awful it must have been to lose someone you loved so much.’
‘Yes, it was.’ As he looked over at her Steven was thinking how right Chloe was—it was kind of strange to sit here talking to her like this. But the funny thing was, she was so easy to talk to. He hadn’t meant to open up to her like that; in fact, he couldn’t remember the last time he had talked to someone about Stephanie. He leaned over and topped up her wine glass. ‘Anyway, let’s not get maudlin,’ he said. ‘It’s Friday night, reason to be celebrating.’
Realising that he might not want to talk about his wife any further, Chloe took the hint and changed the subject. ‘And if this weather keeps up you might not have to go to Manchester tomorrow.’ She raised her glass.
‘Even if the weather improves I might find it difficult to go anyway…because by the looks of things Gina won’t be back tomorrow.’
‘Well, if by some miracle the weather does improve I’ll stay on tomorrow and look after Beth,’ Chloe offered.
‘Thanks, Chloe.’
‘That’s OK. Beth and I get on very well together,’ she said lightly. ‘It would be no hardship.’
Steven smiled at her. ‘Well, that’s very nice of you, but what about Nile—won’t he mind?’ The quietly asked question made her nerves jump. ‘Where’s he tonight, anyway?’
‘I don’t know.’ She smiled a trifle over-brightly. ‘Probably out drinking with his mates…’ She was aware of his dark gaze moving towards her hands, to the finger that had worn Nile’s ring. ‘We called our engagement off almost four weeks ago,’ she admitted huskily.
‘Why didn’t you tell me?’ He frowned. ‘You’ve never said a word about it.’
‘I suppose I’m still trying to get used to the idea myself. ‘And we don’t really talk about our personal lives, do we?’ she said. ‘In fact, I had a hard time even trying to talk to you about work today.’
He grimaced. ‘Sorry, Chloe; hopefully things are going to settle down soon.’
She smiled. ‘We’ve been saying that for ages. Actually, I don’t mind how busy it is—at least the days go quickly.’
‘So your break-up with Nile was very sudden, was it?’ He went back to the subject, his voice gently probing. ‘You two have been together for a long time.’
‘Yes; I met him just before I came to work for you, two years ago. But we were probably just not meant for each other. These things happen.’ With massive determination she tried hard to sound as if she was very together about the whole thing, and she tilted her face up and smiled.
Steven wasn’t fooled by the brave front for a minute. He noted the pallor of her skin and the bright glitter of her blue eyes. ‘Just as well to find you’re not suited now instead of after you married.’
‘Yes…that’s what I keep telling myself. But we were living together for over a year…and I did think…well, obviously I thought he was the guy for me. We’d even booked the registry office…’
‘So…if it’s not too personal a question…what happened? Was it another woman?’
She noted with grim amusement that his first surmise was that Nile had dumped her. ‘Well, not exactly, although it turns out that there is another woman in the background now…’ Maybe that other woman had been there all along and he had just picked that argument with her as an excuse to leave…and take their money, she thought grimly.
‘Well, he’s an idiot to give you up,’ Steven said briskly. ‘A complete idiot.’
The compliment took Chloe aback. She wished now that she hadn’t taken off her glasses so that she could read the darkly impassive features more clearly. ‘Thank you.’ She looked away from him, feeling suddenly embarrassed. She couldn’t really believe that she was talking like this to him; it felt really weird.
‘You’ll meet someone else, fall in love and thank your lucky stars that you didn’t marry him.’
Her lips twisted drily. ‘I didn’t realise you were such a romantic.’
‘Neither did I.’ He smiled. ‘But it sounded good, didn’t it?’
Chloe thought about that for a moment and then shook her head. ‘I don’t know about that…’
‘Why not?’
She shrugged. ‘Well, this business of the earth moving and lightning zinging through you when you kiss someone—it’s all just a big distraction, isn’t it?’
‘Distraction from what?’
‘The reality of whether you really are suited to spend the rest of your life with someone.’
‘You’re a bit young to be so cynical.’
‘I don’t think it’s cynical; I think it’s sensible.’ Chloe stared at the fire as she thought about Nile and their relationship. She had thought she had it all worked out with Nile Flynn…thought they were on exactly the same wavelength. Then came the argument four weeks ago, and she had discovered not only were they not on the same wavelength but they were tuned into entirely different frequencies.
He had accused her of being too interested in her work! It had been a ridiculous thing to say—she’d always been into her career. And, although she hadn’t said it to him, she recalled all too well that he hadn’t complained when he had needed her support for the long period during his own business difficulties. She had been the main breadwinner for well over a year. The strange thing was that now he was getting back on his feet financially again he seemed to hold that against her.
She would never understand men, she thought angrily. She hadn’t minded helping him, had been there for him both emotionally and financially. It hadn’t mattered to her who earned the most money. She had just thought that they were working in unison with the goal of their new house now well in sight.
And she had loved him; OK, there had been no wild sparks between them, there never had been. It had been more a quiet, steady kind of feeling. But Chloe had liked it like that, had liked the fact that they both had their feet on the ground; she had thought Nile felt exactly the same. He’d certainly led her to think he felt the same.
The angry rhetoric of four weeks ago had come as a total shock. It had started innocently enough because she’d been late home from work. He’d said she didn’t have enough time for him. That she had all her priorities all wrong; she put her work ahead of him. She had made one little remark about the fact that she needed her job and had to treat it seriously and he had flown into a complete rage. He had made some very disdainful and derogatory remarks about her work and it was then that she had realised suddenly that he deeply resented the fact that she had been the one to keep things together financially when work hadn’t been going well for him.
When she had suggested quietly that they sit down and discuss things he had arrogantly dismissed the idea and stormed out of the apartment.
It had been such a ridiculous argument that she had thought he might have reflected on the conversation, come back, sat down and discussed things in a more reasonable manner. But Nile hadn’t come back, or at least not while she had been there. She had returned from work the following day and all his belongings had gone, leaving no trace that he had ever shared her life.
‘I thought Nile liked the fact that I had an independent streak,’ she said, turning to look at Steven. ‘But it turned out that he didn’t like that at all.’
For a second Steven had a glimpse of such raw vulnerability in Chloe’s eyes, it was the first time he had ever seen that and it startled him slightly. Chloe was always in control, and together.
She looked away from him hastily and he was left wondering if he had imagined it.
‘Anyway, I reckon the bottom line is he’s seeing someone else. One of my friends saw him out with her not so long ago.’ She looked back sharply at Steven. ‘So much for love,’ she said pointedly. ‘I think the next man I meet I’m going to push that particular emotion even further down on my list of requirements.’
Steven surveyed her through narrowed, thoughtful eyes. ‘So what attributes would you put at the top of your list of requirements?’ he asked curiously.
‘Mutual respect.’ She closed her eyes for a moment as she thought about the question. ‘And he’d have to be someone who is kind and thoughtful.’
Watching her, Steven couldn’t help wondering if passion would figure anywhere on her list. He had a feeling that under the sensible, businesslike exterior she liked to portray she would have an extremely passionate side. His eyes drifted slowly down over her clothing. For one thing, he suspected that beneath those suits there was a very delectable body hidden away.
Aware that he was watching her with close attention, Chloe felt suddenly flustered and wondered why on earth she had told him all that! ‘Anyway, that’s enough about me,’ she said awkwardly. ‘Where’s Helen tonight?’ she asked, swiftly moving the conversation.
‘She’s been working on a very big case down at the crown court all week. Verdict came in today and her client has been acquitted. So I think the whole team are out celebrating.’
‘Must be a bit difficult juggling your social life sometimes,’ she considered. ‘What with Helen being such a high-flying barrister and you running Cavendish.’
‘It takes a bit of effort to co-ordinate our schedules,’ he agreed wryly.
Outside in the hallway the grandfather clock struck two, its chimes echoing through the silence of the house.
‘I didn’t realise it was that time,’ Chloe said in surprise.
‘No, neither did I.’ Steven grinned. ‘For two people who don’t usually talk about our personal lives, we’ve certainly made up on some lost ground.’
‘Yes.’ She smiled at him.
‘And it’s been very enjoyable.’
As she sipped her wine she thought how Steven was right—it was pleasurable sitting here with him like this. He was a nice guy. And there was almost something romantic about the half-light of the fire, the snow falling silently and thickly outside the patio doors. Trouble was, they were the wrong two people. He should be with Helen, she should be with Nile, she reminded herself sternly.
Her eyes moved over him contemplatively. He looked incredibly sexy in that casual attire. She wondered suddenly what it would be like to curl her fingers through the thick darkness of his hair and be kissed by him. She recoiled in shock from the thought. He was her boss! The man who barked orders and threw paperwork at her. The man who unnerved her with that dark, steady gaze. Had she taken leave of her senses?
He looked over and met her eyes and smiled. It was such a warm, attractive smile that it made her feel even more confused. Steven Cavendish was simply gorgeous, she thought hazily. But if he knew what she had just been thinking he’d be horrified, she told herself.
‘I’d better get to bed.’ Chloe finished her glass of wine.
‘We haven’t finished the bottle of wine,’ he said. ‘Stay and have another drink.’
‘I’d better not.’ She stood up and Steven also got politely to his feet.
‘Well, goodnight.’ She smiled at him a little self-consciously.
‘Goodnight.’ His gaze seemed to move from her eyes towards her lips as he spoke.
Chloe didn’t move away; something held her rooted to the spot.
He reached out and smoothed a stray strand of hair away from her eyes. It was a strangely intimate gesture and the touch of his fingers against her skin made her feel hot inside.
‘You look lovely with your hair loose like that,’ he murmured. ‘You should wear it like that more often.’
‘It…it gets in the way.’ As she stared into his eyes she felt her heart thundering against her chest.
‘You are so practical about everything,’ he said gently. ‘The way you dress…even the way you think about relationships.’ His lips slanted into a wryly teasing smile. ‘I bet you even alphabetically index your CD collection, don’t you?’
‘No…’ She smiled. ‘But it’s a very good idea…’ Her voice trailed off as he leaned closer and she realised suddenly that he was going to kiss her.
She could have moved away from him, but she didn’t want to. Some kind of madness seemed to take hold of her and she leaned forward, meeting him halfway and then responding to the soft pressure of his mouth with a rising feeling of hunger.
Being folded into his arms was the most amazing feeling. His lips were sensually provocative as they moved over hers, gently at first and then with a fiercer heat that set her on fire. She felt his body pressed hard against hers and it sent a thrill of excitement flooding through her. Chloe wanted to be closer; she wanted him to caress her body. When she felt his hands stroking up over her back she wanted to melt into him, feel his hands against her skin.
She wound her arms up and around his neck and the kiss deepened further, Steven exploring her mouth with a sensual mastery that sent her control spinning wildly. The sudden touch of his hands against the bare skin of her waist made her realise that her blouse had been pulled from the waistband of her skirt. The sensation of his hands against her naked skin made her tingle all over, her thoughts incoherent with a desire that was totally overwhelming.
She wanted him to unbutton her blouse, wanted to feel his hands moving and caressing over her breasts, which were now tight and aching with the weight of her desire.
He kissed the side of her face and found the soft, sensitive skin at her neck in a way that sent even more darts of pleasure through her.
If he continued like this she was going to want to make love totally and completely, and this was all wrong.
The knowledge hit her like a seed of sanity in a storm of desire.
CHAPTER THREE
AS SHE stepped back from him she felt dazed and disorientated. No one had ever kissed her like that before; no one had ever turned her on so easily in such a wildly exhilarating way. Her loss of control had been scary.
‘I don’t suppose I should have done that,’ Steven murmured huskily.
‘Not the most sensible of moves,’ she agreed, her voice uneven with the raggedness of her breathing. ‘We’ve got to work together…’
His eyes lingered on her mouth again and she found herself forgetting what she was saying…where she was, even.
With the utmost difficulty she forced herself to move away. ‘We’ll forget it and put it down to the wine…and…and…’ She couldn’t think straight and her heart rate was wild, drumming chaotically with a need that was so intense it was shocking.
‘And a moment of madness at a late hour,’ he finished for her. In contrast to her, Steven sounded very much in control.
Sharply she tried to pull herself together. ‘Yes, it was definitely madness. We’ll just forget it.’ It was a relief to hear her voice sounding so cool. She couldn’t let him know how deeply that kiss had affected her…especially as it had just been a light-hearted, meaningless gesture to him.
Chloe turned away from him and tried surreptitiously to tuck her blouse neatly back into her skirt. She cringed as she remembered how she had wound her arms around his neck, openly inviting his caresses. How could she have behaved so shamelessly, and with her boss, of all people?
She picked up her glasses from the coffee table. As she put them back on it was as if she was slipping back behind her mask. ‘Would you like me to take these dishes back into the kitchen before I turn in?’ She tried to pretend that her mind had now moved away from what had happened, that she was now concentrating on practicalities.
‘No, I’ll see to them. I’m going to stay down here a while, finish my wine.’
‘OK, well, I’ll say goodnight, then.’ She forced herself to turn and face him. Then remembered his response when she had said goodnight last time and wished she had just left without saying anything.
She was aware that he was watching her closely but she couldn’t bear to meet his eyes. What was he thinking? she wondered… Was he just amused by what had happened? Or maybe amused by the effect it seemed to have had on her—one kiss and Chloe’s thrown totally out of kilter?
‘Goodnight, Chloe; sleep well.’
‘Yes, I’m sure I will…I’m exhausted, actually…probably fall asleep the moment my head touches the pillow.’ She wasn’t going to let him think she would lose any sleep over one silly kiss.
It was a blessed relief to escape to the sanctuary of her room. She sank down on the bed and sat there for a moment, trying to steady her breathing and gather her thoughts.
Why had he kissed her like that?
A moment’s madness, he had said…probably all there was to it. One thing was for certain: if they were to work as easily and comfortably together as they had in the past, she was going to have to just forget it.
She got up and went into the en suite bathroom to strip off and stand for a long time under the refreshing force of the power shower. Then, having no nightdress to put on, she had to slip naked between the sheets of the double bed. They were cool and refreshing against her heated skin. She reached out and switched off the bedside light, then lay staring up into the darkness.
