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Not all? Wasn’t that enough? What else could there be? He tried to focus on what she was saying. “Huh?”
“Rita was here today, doing another inspection. She’s, um, pretty steamed.”
“Why?” He eased himself out of the truck, knowing he had to move but wincing at every budge of his smarting muscles. “What happened?”
“You’d better look for yourself.”
Her delicate hands helped him stumble to the sidewalk and up the path. She pushed open the front door and guided him inside.
The living room was littered with stuff, as usual. Smoky, water-soaked stuff, he noticed. Dishes cluttered the kitchen counter and food sat on the table as flies buzzed over it. A huge black spot covered the ceiling, most of the stove and a section of the floor.
He shuddered, immediately alert to the fact that he could hear no children’s voices. “What happened?”
“Tildy was frying. The oil caught on fire.”
That woke him up. He gulped at the idea of his lovely young niece covered in burns.
“She was trying to help Pierce and forgot to pay attention. Jared saw it start and thought he could put it out with a dish towel. That caught on fire too.” She pointed to the corner. “The oil set the cloth alight and when he tossed it to the floor, it caught onto the laundry Lacey was going to wash. I saw smoke and came over. By the time I got here, Pierce had finally found a fire extinguisher and put it out, but by then Rita had already arrived.”
“But where was Mrs. Anders?”
“Apparently the hospital called to say her husband had a heart attack. She told the kids to call me when she couldn’t reach you, but they didn’t want to be a bother. I think Tildy was afraid I’d make her wait to fry. She’s desperate to get an A in that class.”
It was clear to Wade by the glint in her eyes that Clarissa felt the children were reciting his precise words. He clenched his fists, drew a breath and summoned all his courage.
“And? You might as well spit out the rest of it.” His heart dropped to his boots as he surveyed the damage and considered how much worse off they could have been.
“Rita told me to take the kids. I wanted to call you but no one knew where you were.” There was a hint of censure in her voice. “I tried to stall her, but she’d already made her decision by then.”
Wade saw her swallow, heard her voice drop, and knew the worst had happened.
“I think she’s going to recommend foster care, Wade.”
“She can’t!” He couldn’t bear the thought of it, his sister’s kids split apart, separated, living with people who wouldn’t understand them. His own life, empty and barren of the joy they brought, the small glimpses of his sister he caught in each child. Worst of all, the promise would be broken.
He shook his head, refusing to accept it. “She can’t.”
“Yes, Wade. She can. I just wanted to warn you.” Clarissa didn’t meet his glance, but stood staring at her feet, her head bowed in sadness.
Wade stared at the mess he’d made of things. “I should have been here, should have been nearby. Why did I have to pick this afternoon to run to the city for supplies?”
“It doesn’t matter now.” Her head lifted as if she’d come to some decision. She studied his face for a long moment, then tugged at his arm. “Come on, Wade.”
“It does matter.” He felt the responsibility and almost bowed under it. “It’s my fault. It’s all my fault. They could have died. I should have managed better. No matter how hard I try, I never seem to get it right. I messed up here. Again.” He couldn’t look her in the eye, knew he’d see condemnation.
Clarissa’s fingers tightened on his arm. “I’m sure you’ve done the best you could. No one was hurt. And it’s not anyone’s fault. Accidents happen.” She pushed against his chest. “Come with me. I’ve already called the insurance agency. It’s the only one in town, remember. Your renter’s policy covers most of the damage, they think. But you can’t stay here. Not till they’ve assessed the damage.”
He stared at her, his mind numb with the realization that his little family was now homeless. His brain wouldn’t move on from that. He felt the tug on his arm as if through a fog. “Oh. No, I suppose not. Thank you.”
“You’re welcome. Can you get up?”
Dimly Wade realized that sometime during their conversation he’d flopped down onto one of the kitchen chairs. His eyes noted the places where fire had singed the flooring, and he shivered at the thought of what might have happened.
“Wade?”
“What?” He blinked and refocused on her, forcing his mind to function. “Oh. Get up? Why?”
“You need a shower and something to eat, for one thing. You can have that at my place. The water heater’s turned off here. The firemen said it was better that way. Come on.”
He managed to get up and stumble to the back door, grateful for her calm even voice and the gentle hand under his arm. His brain couldn’t take it all in. It was like a bad dream.
A pile of charred bits of fabric lay outside the back door. Wade stopped in his tracks and stared. He couldn’t seem to move his eyes away, couldn’t stop imagining the scars…
“Wade, listen to me.” Clarissa turned his face toward her, her palms cool again his cheeks.
She felt good, he decided. Soothing. He didn’t even try to free himself. Her flower-soft fragrance tickled his nose. Roses, he thought. Or lavender maybe. Something like his mother would have worn.
Her eyes were clear and calm. “You have to get out of here now, Wade. Everybody is fine. They’re okay. Come on, let’s keep going.”
He moved on only because he knew she would nag him until he did. He walked across the grass, and into her yard with its pretty flowers and trim grass, marveling at the contrast between the two houses. His fingers curled around her small soft hand. Such a tiny hand to be so competent.
“I’m fine,” he mumbled when her other hand slid under his arm. He forced his rubber legs to move one foot in front of the other.
“Of course you are. Three steps up now.” There was a hint of amused mockery in her quiet tones.
“I’m just worried about the kids. My boots—”
“Are fine.” She urged him inside. “Sit down here and drink this.”
He took the cup from her fingers and sipped the dark steaming brew. “I don’t take sugar.”
“Today you do. Drink it.” There was no room for argument in that prim order.
Wade drank, his mind picturing that awful scene again.
“They’re fine, Wade. See, there’s Pierce working on his birds in the front yard. And Tildy’s sitting out there, too. With Ryan Adams. Lacey’s over in the park. You can just see her red shirt through the trees.” She pointed.
Wade followed the direction and caught sight of Lacey’s favorite blouse. “Jared?” he choked, his heart swelling with relief.
“I’m right here. I’m trying to fix this stupid—uh, broken cupboard.” Jared came to stand before his uncle. He frowned. “You don’t look too good, Uncle Wade.”
“That’s funny. I feel fine. Just fine.” Wade noticed his sister’s distinct features in the tall boy and felt the guilt wash over him again. He was growing up so fast. “Are you all right, son?”
“Of course. We all are. Clarissa’s taking care of things. That’s okay, isn’t it, Uncle Wade?” Jared’s face contorted with worry. “You’re not mad that we got her? Tildy didn’t mean to do it, you know. It was an accident.”
“I know. No. It’s perfect. Okay, I mean.” Wade glanced around with bleary eyes, noting the sparkling kitchen, the yeasty fragrance of fresh baked bread, the utter hominess of it all. No matter what he did, his kitchen had never looked like this. He noticed Jared’s frown and refocused.
“It’s just fine,” he repeated, then stopped when his stomach began a low but very audible rumbling.
“Jared, will you show your uncle where the shower is? And here are some fresh towels. As soon as he’s ready, we’ll have dinner.” Clarissa smiled, her eyes meeting Wade’s. “Go ahead. Everything is all right. I’ll watch them for you. We’ll talk later.”
Wade followed Jared up the stairs, easing up on the balustrade when he felt it give under his weight.
“Another thing to be fixed,” he muttered, trying to smother a yawn. “This house sure needs a lot of catch-up work.”
“You should have let me help you finish MacGregor’s roof last night,” Jared told him, frowning. “I can do stuff. Besides, you can’t work morning, noon and night, Uncle Wade. Nobody can. You’ll burn out. I heard the teachers talking about it.”
“I’ll do whatever it takes to make a home for you kids. I promised your mom, and I’m not breaking that promise.” Wade let himself be led into the bathroom. He accepted the armload of towels and listened as Jared explained the old-fashioned shower.
“Make sure you keep that curtain in the tub or Clarissa’s place will be flooded,” the boy ordered, frowning up at him as if he wasn’t sure Wade understood.
“Uh-huh. Curtain inside. Got it.” Wade repeated the words mindlessly, unable to hang onto any thought other than that the kids were all right.
After a long searching look at his uncle, Jared left the bathroom, apparently satisfied that Wade could manage on his own. Wade grinned at such consideration, but decided it was rather endearing coming from the boy.
He stripped off his clothes, fully conscious of how much dust he was leaving in the pretty lavender-and-white bathroom. He’d spent the sunrise hours of this morning replacing hundred-year-old attic shavings with insulation so that the owners could move in right away. Most of the dust had settled somewhere on him.
As he felt the warm sting of the water trickle over his aching body, Wade closed his eyes and searched for an answer.
Please God, what should I do now? I can’t give up Kendra’s kids. I just can’t. I promised her.
Sometime later, Wade didn’t know how long, the water grew cool, then the chill of it finally penetrated to his brain. He turned the taps off and grabbed a towel, rubbing himself fiercely to warm up.
Someone, Jared maybe, had set some clean clothes on the toilet seat. He pulled them on automatically, barely noting the newly replaced buttons and carefully stitched tears.
Then he sat down to think.
He had to do something. Figure out something. He wasn’t going to lose Kendra’s kids. Not now. He’d promised and, no matter what it cost, this time he was keeping his promise. He wasn’t going to mess up again, social worker or no.
His eye caught sight of the silk lavender bathrobe hanging on the back of the door. Clarissa was a lavender kind of woman. Her pale skin and silver-streaked hair would look perfect in the color. A pair of slippers lay on the floor, and he imagined her padding around this old house in the morning.
He’d seen her several times when he’d risen early. She always put out birdseed first thing. Then he’d catch the hint of fresh brewed coffee and pretty soon she’d be sitting at the table by the bay window, sipping it as she watched the birds peck at their meal. It took her a long time to wake up, but eventually she’d move, and Wade would catch the aroma of frying bacon or grilling sausages.
Now that the weather was warmer, she’d begun eating outside, sharing her breakfast with whatever came along. Then she’d pull up a few weeds, water her garden, finish her coffee and undo her hair.
Wade always liked watching her brush out her hair, though he felt a bit embarrassed, like a Peeping Tom or something. But once she undid that knot on top, he couldn’t tear his eyes away. He would never have believed her hair was so long, not when she wound it up on the top of her head like that. Free and cascading down her back, it flowed well past her waist in a river of sparkling silver.
A shrill childish laugh penetrated his musing and Wade got up to look out the small bathroom window. Pierce was pointing at a tree and ordering everyone to look. Seconds later Clarissa came outside, a big book in her hands. She and Pierce sat together on the grass and searched through the pages until they found what they wanted. Wade watched as Pierce leaned his head on Clarissa’s shoulder, his voice barely audible on the late afternoon air.
“Am I a nerd, Clarissa?”
“Of course not! I don’t know many children who could identify as many birds as you can, Pierce. Why would you think such a thing?” She sounded truly amazed by his question.
“That’s what the kids call me. They say it’s stupid to spend so much time on birds.” Pierce shrugged. “Maybe they’re right. I don’t play their games very well.”
As Wade watched, Clarissa hugged the little boy closer.
“Listen, sweetheart. Everybody has different interests. You like birds, and there’s not one thing wrong with that. There’s nothing wrong with games, either. The problem comes when we make fun of other people for their choices.”
“But I don’t fit in! I don’t even know how to catch a ball.”
Pierce’s rueful tones told Wade that catching a ball was very important, and Wade chewed himself out for not spending more time with the boy.
“Then we’ll have to practice. That’s not such a hard thing to learn. Not like a baby bird learning to fly, for goodness sake.” Clarissa’s beautiful smile coaxed him to join in and a minute later Pierce called his big brother to help him practice.
“She’s good,” Wade muttered to himself in admiration. “She’s very, very good with them.”
“I got the frog, but I lost the guy.” That was Lacey, glum with disappointment as she flopped down on the lawn beside Clarissa. “What is it with this biology stuff?”
“Oh? Didn’t Kevin want to study with you?” Clarissa sounded amused. “He certainly rushed over here quickly when he heard about the fire.”
Wade frowned. Who the dickens was Kevin? And what did the kid want with his niece?
“Kevin had to go home for supper.” Lacey sprawled on the grass, bare feet nestling into Clarissa’s skirt. “Honestly, he’s so smart, I feel like a dud.”
“He’s not smart about everything.” Clarissa fiddled with her skirt, but Wade caught the glimmer of a smile twitching at the corners of her mouth. “I happen to know that he’s only recently taken to studying biology. You might ask him for help with your own work.”
“You mean like spend a date dissecting a frog?” Lacey made a face. “Ugh!”
“Well, why not? You’d get to spend time together. Anyway, you’re too young to date.”
Wade watched as Clarissa rose lithely to her feet, her hand gently smoothing the other girl’s hair.
“Think about it,” she murmured. “I’ve got to check the kitchen. I think Tildy’s forgotten something.”
Wade adjusted his position and spotted the tiny funnel cloud of smoke coming out the back screen door. He groaned. “How many times is it going to take for that girl?”
When no one answered him, he realized he was talking to himself. Gathering up his dirty clothes, he headed downstairs to face the reality of his messed-up life.
“Tildy, honey, you have to set the timer. Then things won’t burn, even if you do forget. The timer will remind you.”
“How many cakes is that?” Tildy’s tearful voice warned Wade that she’d been at it for a while. So did the acrid odor of smoldering sugar.
“It’s only a bit of flour and sugar, Tildy. It doesn’t matter. We’ll just try again after supper. Okay?”
A huge sigh. “Okay. Thanks a lot, Clarissa. I really appreciate it.”
“You’re welcome, sweetie.”
Wade walked in just as Clarissa hugged his niece. He stood there, studying their obvious camaraderie for a long time. It was only when she touched his arm, that he realized Clarissa had been speaking to him. He jerked to attention, pushing his thoughts away. “Sorry. What did you say?”
“I’ll take the clothes and put them in the washer. You sit down. We’re all ready.” In a matter of seconds she had the others gathered around her worn oak table. “I’ll just say grace.”
Wade automatically bowed his head, listening to her few soft words of thanks.
“Now, if you could slice this roast, we’ll be all ready.” She handed him the carving knife and a platter with a piece of succulent beef sitting in the middle of it, juices dark and tantalizingly pooled around it.
Wade watched as she set out a heaping dish of mashed potatoes, peas, gravy, fresh rolls and a salad. His mouth watered. His stomach rumbled again, more loudly this time. The kids burst out laughing.
