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She watched her daughter start up the steps with an expression that told Ryan clearly that she didn’t want her daughter out of her sight. That caution was natural enough, he supposed, after what they’d been through, but Nolie would take good care of the child, and she’d be away from the mess and dirt.
When they’d disappeared toward the apartment, Laura swung around and headed straight toward him. She stopped a scant two feet away and scowled. “This is your doing, isn’t it?” She kept her voice low, apparently not wanting everyone else to hear.
“Hey, I’m innocent.”
She raised level dark brows. “Am I supposed to believe it’s a total coincidence that my house is filled with Flanagans?”
“Some of them aren’t. Flanagans, I mean. There are a couple of firefighters here, and some people from the church that Brendan recruited.”
“Don’t you mean you recruited?”
“Not me. All I did was mention the fire to my mother. She did the rest.” He gave a mock shudder.
“Trust me on this one. My mother may be soft-spoken, but you don’t want to get between her and something she’s decided to do.”
“Do you really want me to believe you’re afraid of your mother?”
He grinned. “You bet.”
Well, not afraid of her, but concerned about her opinion. Maybe that was why he hadn’t told his mother yet about applying to the arson squad.
“I don’t believe you.” She shook her head. “And anyway, that’s not the point.”
“Right. The point is that you want to do everything all by yourself.”
He thought her lips twitched slightly. “Are you trying to make me sound like a two-year-old?”
“You said it, I didn’t.” Before she could respond, he raised both hands. “Let’s declare a truce, okay? We’re here. Is it really so hard to let us help you?”
“No. I’m just—“
“Super-independent. I figured that one out already. What I haven’t figured out yet is why.”
Her dark-brown eyes met his, and for an instant they held so much pain that it took his breath away. Then her usual shield dropped into place and she gave him a polite, meaningless smile.
“I guess all I can do is say thanks.”
She turned away. He stood watching as she picked up a box and began loading debris into it.
Laura had her game face back on now. But he’d seen behind it, and that glimpse into her shook him. A man would have to be crazy to get involved with someone who was carrying that load of grief.
Not that he was even thinking about doing such a thing.
Laura was still wondering what she was doing when she arrived at the Flanagan house for dinner a few evenings later. She was usually quite good at getting out of things she didn’t want to do. Unfortunately she’d found that Siobhan Flanagan was very difficult to keep saying no to.
Maybe it was because Siobhan had been her church-school teacher, back when she’d still had a child’s faith, thinking that every problem could be solved by prayer. She was swept with a sudden wave of longing to be back in that church-school room, sitting in the child-size chair and hearing Bible stories told in Siobhan’s soft, loving voice.
A person could never go back, although the Flanagans seemed to be doing a good job of keeping their lives just the way they’d been.
She held Mandy’s hand as they started up the walk to the welcoming brick house. Everything about the neighborhood—the mature trees, the old-fashioned flowerbeds brimming with tulips and irises, the comfortable old two-story homes—said that here was a place where people found safety and serenity.
She smiled at her daughter as they reached the steps that led to the wide front porch. Pansies crowded pots on either side of the stairs, and a cushion-piled porch swing creaked a little in the breeze.
“Mrs. Flanagan has pretty flowers, doesn’t she?”
Mandy nodded, her small face tense, and Laura’s throat clenched. She was taking her daughter into the sort of situation she usually avoided, just because she couldn’t say no to Siobhan.
“We don’t have to stay long, okay? We can go home right after supper if you want to.”
“Okay.”
She smiled, touching Mandy’s cheek. “Good talking, Mandy.” Mandy didn’t verbalize very often since her hearing had worsened, so it was an occasion for praise when she did.
She squeezed her daughter’s hand, and together they approached the door. It was flung open before she could knock. Three children crowded around them, making Mandy shrink against her.
“They’re here, they’re here!” The oldest, a girl who must be about six or so, caught Mandy’s hand and pulled her inside. “Grammy, they’re here.”
Flanagans. Obviously they were all three Flanagans, with the same reddish-gold hair and blue eyes. If only they weren’t quite so friendly—it was like being surrounded by a bunch of puppies, all trying to jump on her.
“Enough shouting.” Siobhan grabbed the smallest boy and held him close. “You sound like a bunch of hooligans. Welcome, Laura. Mandy. We’re glad you’re here.”
“Thank you for inviting us.” How soon would it be polite to leave?
“These two monsters are Mary Kate’s.” She touched the oldest girl and the boy who looked about Mandy’s age. “Shawna and Michael.” She squeezed the smaller boy. “And this is Seth’s little boy, Davy.”
The front door opened into a large, comfortable, slightly shabby living room. The adults all seemed to be gathered around the fireplace. All of them were looking at her.
Siobhan led her forward and began introducing them. Mandy stayed close behind her, clutching her hand tightly. Most of them she knew already, but she hadn’t met Brendan’s wife or Seth’s fiancée. She nodded, smiled, and decided that there were way too many Flanagans.
One was missing, though. She’d recognized the moment she entered the room that Ryan wasn’t here. On duty, maybe? Before she could be sure whether she felt relief or disappointment, he came striding in from what was probably the kitchen.
She absolutely would not feel pleasure at the sight of him. Still, when his smile lit his deep-blue eyes, it was hard not to, especially when he came directly to her.
“Laura, hi. Well, what do you think?” He waved toward his family. “If you can stand all these people talking at once, you might be able to get through a Sunday supper at the Flanagan house.”
“Stop teasing, Ryan.” Siobhan swatted at him affectionately. “You make Laura feel welcome, now. I’ve got to get back to the roast.”
“Can I do something—” she began, but Siobhan was already gone.
“This is your first time here,” Ryan said. “Relax and enjoy yourself. It’s Mary Kate’s family’s turn to help this week, anyway.”
“You do this every Sunday?”
“Terrifying, isn’t it?” His grin negated the words. “If the weather’s nice, we go out to Gabe and Nolie’s farm instead, where the kids can run. Mandy would like seeing the place. Lots of animals.”
Was that an invitation? She wasn’t sure, and maybe it was safer to ignore it.
“I thought maybe you were working tonight.” That suggested she’d been looking for him, and she wanted the words back.
“We all try to get off Sunday when we can. These get-togethers are important to Mom. Besides, Pastor Brendan would get after us if we missed church.” His eyebrows lifted. “I thought maybe we’d see you there this morning.”
Apparently the Flanagans didn’t intend to let her forget that she’d once belonged to their church. A little flicker of annoyance went through her. “I’m not sure Mandy would feel comfortable there.”
“Why not?” His eyes were fixed on hers, seeming to demand an answer.
“It’s difficult when she can’t understand what’s going on.” And why won’t you leave it alone?
“Nolie’s always in church school. I know she’d be glad to sign for Mandy.”
He was crowding her on the subject, and she frowned at him. “It’s hard for her to interact with hearing children.”
“Really?” He nodded toward the corner of the room.
“She seems to be doing fine at the moment.”
She’d thought Mandy was still at her side. Instead she was clear across the room, sitting in front of a tower of blocks with the other children.
She made an instinctive movement toward them. “I’ll just go and—”
Ryan stopped her with a touch on her arm. “Why don’t you let them play? They’re okay.”
Irritation scraped along her nerves. Ryan didn’t know anything about raising a hearing-impaired child. But she watched as Shawna handed Mandy a block, clapping when she put it on top of the tower. Mandy’s solemn little face broke into a smile.
Laura’s throat tightened. That was what she wanted for Mandy—to see her playing normally with other children instead of being trapped and isolated in her silent world.
“Laura, it’s grand to have you back in Suffolk.” Ryan’s father approached with an outstretched hand. She probably would have known Joe Flanagan anywhere—he still had that square, bulldog face and friendly smile, although only a few tinges of red showed in his now-white hair.
“Thank you. And thanks for all the help from your family with the fire clean-up.”
He shrugged. “Firefighters enjoy seeing things put back to rights after a fire. You know that all of us Flanagans are involved with the department now, don’t you?”
Ryan groaned. “Please, Dad. I’m sure Laura doesn’t want to hear about our old family traditions.”
His father’s face tightened, as if he were about to issue a reprimand.
“I have every reason to know about Seth and Terry and Ryan, since I met them on the job,” she said quickly.
Joe nodded. “I guess you did at that. Sorry I wasn’t there. I never thought I’d be stuck at a desk job in the department, but it makes me proud to know that those three are out there on my old team.”
She nodded, glancing at Ryan, and was struck by the expression that crossed his face at his father’s words. What was it? It was gone too quickly to say, but she was left with a sense of something uneasy behind Ryan’s smile.
Chapter Three
Despite her qualms, Laura decided that the evening had gone pretty well. They’d moved past dessert and coffee, and she sat next to Nolie, Gabe’s wife, on the sofa. The other woman had the serene, absorbed face some women wore during pregnancy, as if they listened to something inside themselves.
“Do you know yet if the baby’s a boy or girl? Or aren’t you telling?”
She’d been eager to find out when she was pregnant. The tests had told her she was going to have a daughter. They hadn’t been able to predict that Mandy would be born with a serious hearing problem.
“It’s a girl.” Nolie’s face curved in a satisfied smile.
“I thought maybe Gabe would want a boy first, but he says after growing up with his brothers and cousin, he’s delighted to have a baby girl.”
“That’s lovely.” Unexpected tears stung her eyes, and she blinked them away. “My husband—”
She stopped. Jason had been disappointed their child had been a girl, and doubly disappointed that she hadn’t been perfect, but she shouldn’t say that.
“I’m sorry.” Nolie clasped her hand in sudden empathy, seeming to understand what she didn’t say. “But you shouldn’t worry too much about her. I work with children who have disabilities, so I see the parents’ concerns all the time. Mandy’s such a bright, loved child. Believe me, she’ll do fine.”
“I want her to have the best. I know she can live a full life without hearing, but if she qualifies for the cochlear implant—”
A cry interrupted her, and she swung around, heartbeat accelerating. Mandy—
Michael was trying to pull a toy train from her hand. He wrenched it free, and Mandy wailed.
She was across the room in an instant, but Siobhan got there first, pulling her grandson away.
“Michael Joseph Driscoll, I’m disappointed in you. Mandy is our guest. Say you’re sorry.”
“He just wanted to show her how it works, Grammy,” Shawna said. “Honest.”
Laura wrapped her arms around Mandy, feeling her child’s hot tears against her face. Her heart hurt. Mandy didn’t understand. How could she?
“Sorry,” Michael mumbled.
Everyone was looking at them. All she wanted to do was get out.
“That’s fine, Michael. I know you didn’t mean it.” She struggled to smile at the child. After all, he was just behaving like a normal, hearing five-year-old.
She stood, holding Mandy in her arms, arranging a smile on her face for Siobhan. “Mandy’s getting tired. I think it’s time we headed for home. Thank you so much for dinner.”
Siobhan was wise enough not to argue, but Laura could read the regret in her eyes. She gave Laura a quick hug and stroked Mandy’s curls. “It was lovely to have you here. Come again soon.”
She nodded, her smile stiff. No, they wouldn’t come again. All the Flanagans meant well, but Mandy needed a less chaotic environment than the one they provided.
Ryan reached her and lifted Mandy from her arms before she realized what he was doing. “I’ll walk you out.”
“I’ll take her.” They’d had this conversation before, hadn’t they? Ryan hadn’t listened to her then.
“Mandy’s fine with me, aren’t you, little girl?” He stroked Mandy’s hair with a gentle touch.
She hated to admit it, but he was right. Mandy snuggled against him, her face tucked into his strong shoulder. For some reason that was obscure to Laura, Mandy trusted him.
She said her goodbyes quickly, trying to evade repeated invitations and offers of help from each of the Flanagans. It seemed the goodbyes would never end, but finally she escaped out the front door with Ryan carrying Mandy.
She paused for an instant on the porch, inhaling the cool spring air and absorbing the quiet.
“Okay?” Ryan gave her a quizzical look.
