скачать книгу бесплатно
When she flinched, he knew he was right.
Clenching her fists, she raised her chin. “It doesn’t concern you.”
He was shaken and wondered who she’d been with. “How far along are you?”
“A couple of months,” she replied. “I haven’t told my family or anyone yet, so I would appreciate it if you don’t.”
“Don’t worry,” he snapped. “Who’s the man?”
“I’m not giving out his identity,” she replied stiffly, but there was a flash in her eyes that shook him. He walked closer to her.
“How far along are you?” he asked again. “Tell me the truth, Ashley.” He placed his hands on her shoulders. “How many months are you? Dammit, I want to know.”
“Get out. I”m not telling you.”
“You know I can find out some way. I have enough money to get the information I want.”
Suddenly she looked frightened, and gazed wide-eyed at him while shock buffeted him. “How many months?” he said, barely able to get out the words.
“Over three,” she said, glaring at him. “This is my baby and I don’t want any interference. Now, you get out of here.”
Stunned, he stared at her. “There isn’t another man, is there?” he asked.
“Get out, Ryan.”
He knew the answer. He was the father of Ashley’s baby. Shocked, he couldn’t believe it, but he could tell from looking at her that it was true. “We used protection.”
“Get out of my office!” she snapped.
Stunned by the news, he turned and left, going out to the car to sit behind the wheel and try to absorb what he’d learned. He started it up and drove a block, then pulled to the curb, cutting the engine to stare into space. He was the father of Ashley’s baby! She was pregnant from their weekend together. He had difficulty accepting the truth. He’d used condoms, and nothing had failed, that he had known. He was stiff with shock, unaware of the traffic pouring past him, of the spring morning, of joggers running by.
Ashley was going to have a baby. His baby.
Shaking, Ashley walked around her desk and sank into the chair, calling Carlotta on the intercom to tell her that if Ryan Warner appeared, she was not available to see him. Then she closed her eyes.
What a mess she’d made of the morning! And exactly what she’d hoped to avoid had happened. Ryan knew the truth.
He’d been shocked, and obviously didn’t want any part of it—that much was a relief to her, even though at the same time, it angered her. She knew she shouldn’t feel conflicted about his reaction, but she did.
She rubbed her throbbing forehead and longed to undo the morning. Wished she had been wise enough last night to refuse to eat breakfast with him today.
When her intercom buzzed, she groaned. She didn’t feel like dealing with anyone yet. She pushed the button to speak to Carlotta.
“Ryan Warner is on his way to your office. I’m sorry, I couldn’t stop him.”
“That’s all right,” Ashley said, knowing her receptionist couldn’t have kept out a determined male like him.
Before she could answer his knock, he strode into her office, closing the door behind him.
“I don’t want to see you, but I don’t suppose that matters to you,” she said.
“No, it doesn’t. You weren’t going to tell me about my baby.” He flung the accusation at her in a low, steely tone.
“Yes, I was, but not until after the baby is born, because I don’t want your interference.”
“How about my help?”
“I don’t want that, either,” she said.
He crossed the room and sat in the chair he’d placed beside hers earlier, gazing intently at her. “Why the hell not?” he asked. A muscle worked in his jaw.
“You’ll take charge of my life. I want to take care of myself,” she stated in a haughty voice, and raised her chin.
“It seems to me you sure as hell could use some financial help. You should welcome it.”
“I know what I’m doing.”
“And it seems to me you should let your family know.”
“I’ll tell them soon. Other than the doctor, you’re the first to hear about it. Look, your immediate reaction was an honest one—you tore out of here in shock and didn’t want any part of this. Don’t try to include yourself now out of a sense of guilt.”
“I left in shock and because you kept asking me to go. I’m not suffering any guilt,” he insisted.
“Oh, please,” she said, giving him a skeptical look. She was annoyed with him, certain he must be steeped in guilt, to return as he had with an offer of help. His tie was awry, his hair tangled on his forehead and he looked as if he had been wrestling with something difficult. She waved her hand. “Go on, Ryan. I’ll keep you posted.”
“No,” he said. “I can easily help out, and this is my baby, too. I can provide a nanny, and you’ll have to have a nursery.”
“See, this is exactly why I didn’t want you involved!” she exclaimed in exasperation. “You’re making my decisions.” She rubbed her forehead. “I don’t feel well. Why don’t you leave me alone this morning and we’ll talk later. I need some peace and quiet.”
Looking frustrated, he stood with clenched fists. “I’ll see you tonight. I’ll bring steaks and come to your place. We need to talk about this.”
“Whether I want to or not,” she said.
“Damn straight! This is a life-changing event and I’m involved in it whether you like it or not. You can’t say no to me when it’s my baby.” He strode out of the office and slammed the door behind him.
She ran to yank open the door. “Then eat before you come. I won’t feel like eating, anyway!”
He turned around and with long steps came back. “You need to eat dinner.”
“I know that,” she replied in exasperation. “I’ll eat before you come. You do the same.”
He nodded. “See you around seven.” He hurried out the front and she returned to her office, closing her door and going to sit behind her desk.
She stared into space and wished she had done far more to get him out of her life and keep him from discovering the truth. Now there was no getting rid of him. Ryan was in her life to stay, probably until their baby was grown. Their baby. It shocked her to think about her baby in that way, because after discovering her pregnancy, she had closed Ryan out of any connection to the baby until this morning.
An hour later she felt better. She spent the day trying to keep from worrying about Ryan. She left work early to get ready to see him. He was coming over at seven, and she suspected the night would be one of continual clashes.
After eating a small dinner of a poached egg and toast, she bathed and dressed with care. In spite of all her worries and anger with him, excitement bubbled in her at the thought of seeing Ryan.
As she dried her hair, her intercom buzzed. A florist wanted to get through the gate to deliver flowers. When she went to the door, a driver climbed out of a panel truck and came up the walk with a crystal vase containing a huge bouquet of daises and yellow tulips. She took the arrangement and carried it inside, where she set it on a table and paused to read the card.
“To the mother of my baby,” was scrawled there. “Can’t wait to see you.” It was signed with Ryan’s bold signature.
She shook her head, reminded that he wasn’t going away. She looked again at the card. The mother of my baby …
She placed the card carefully into the bouquet and carried it into her living area, placing it on the coffee table where he would see it. Then she finished dressing.
She let her long, straight blond hair fall freely over her shoulders. Wearing pale yellow slacks and a yellow-and-white cotton shirt and sandals, she gazed at her reflection, turning to look at her flat stomach.
Promptly at seven she heard his car. With a sigh, she braced herself to deal with him.
When she opened the door, the sight of him worked its unfailing magic. In a navy short-sleeved knit shirt and chinos, Ryan looked refreshed and his usual cheerful self.
“Come in. Would you like something to drink? Beer, water, wine, pop?” she asked as he entered.
“Cold beer would be good,” he said, closing the door. “What are you having?”
“Ice water,” she answered.
“I’ll help,” he said, walking beside her. “I know where things are now.” Like everything else he had been doing since learning about the pregnancy, his actions caused her both chagrin and amusement, because he took charge as if it were his kitchen. As soon as he handed her the glass of water and got his beer, they went into the family room and she motioned toward the flowers. “These are lovely.”
“Not nearly as gorgeous as the recipient,” he responded, setting down his beer and taking her ice water to place it on the coffee table. Her heart thudded when he turned to slide his arms around her waist.
“I went slowly last night. I don’t see much need to continue that.”
Her heartbeat quickened as she rested her hands on his forearms. Desire smoldered in his gaze as he watched her. “I disagree,” she replied. “I still want to take some time. We can get to know each other better.”
“Do you know how badly I want to hold and kiss you?” he asked in a husky voice, and her opposing emotions tangled fiercely. She needed him to ease up and give her space. At the same time, she ached to throw her arms around him and kiss him.
“Just wait,” she said, pushing lightly against his muscled chest. “Give me time here. It’s important to me, Ryan,” she said, in spite of her yearning to reach for him.
As she looked into his eyes, she wondered if he had any idea what he did to her heartbeat. The longer they stood with locked gazes, the more she wanted him, and the more difficult it was to push away and establish some space between them. His arm tightened around her waist, and what she craved became more important than what she should do.
“It’s been a long time, Ashley,” he whispered as his gaze dropped to her lips. He leaned down, covering her mouth with his, and his tongue touched hers. Engulfed by longing, she couldn’t resist him. She wrapped her arms around his neck as he drew her closer.
While her heart pounded, he leaned over her, kissing her deeply, his tongue stroking hers and building fires in her. The yearning was intense, insistent; her arguments seemed to go up in flames. She yielded to the moment, aware his kisses had comprised all her fantasies and dreams for months now.
In return she poured out her pent-up hunger, which had grown steadily. As he leaned over her, his hand wound in her locks and she tangled her fingers in his thick hair.
His manhood pressed against her. Clinging tightly to him, she moaned. She ached to be rid of the slightest barriers between them, but knew that couldn’t happen. Not now. Dimly, she realized she needed to regain control and stop, but not yet. She kissed him wildly, wanting him with all her being. He was exciting and desirable, the man of her dreams, the father of her child.
While they kissed, his hand slipped down her back and over her bottom to cup her against him. His kisses conveyed a desperate hunger, an intense need for her that made her want him even more in return.
He shifted her slightly and his fingers drifted over her breast, his feathery caress electrifying. She moaned again. His touch was a sweet torment that heightened her pleasure.
Finally, she pushed against his chest. When she did, he loosened his hold and she looked up at him. “We have to wait. I’m not ready,” she said, her breathlessness denying her words.
“Yes, you are,” he replied in a raspy voice. “And I’m more than ready. I’ve dreamed of you too many nights. I’ve thought about you more than you can possibly imagine.”
His words thrilled her, but she shook her head. “No, I can’t. We wait. There’s too much complicating our lives.”
“This is the best possible time to love each other.”
She twisted free and walked away from him, straightening her clothing and trying to get her emotions under control. She turned to face him.
His mouth was red and his expression conveyed his feelings. There was no question he was eager for her.
Fighting the urge to walk into his arms, she stayed where she was. “We need to talk about the future.”
“There are other ways to solve this and be happy.”
“Lust isn’t going to solve anything.”
“That isn’t how I would describe it. All right, Ashley, we’ll make some plans.”
“That’s exactly what I hoped to avoid. Ryan, I didn’t want you to know about the baby this soon because I knew you’d want to take charge. Let me deal with this. It’s my life, and you never wanted to become a father.”
“This is my baby, too, and you might as well get accustomed to the idea, because I’m not going away.” He spoke quietly, but she detected his unyielding tone.
She glared at him. “I want to have this baby and get settled. After that, let’s talk about what we’ll do.”
He crossed the room to take her hand. “This is so simple. Will you marry me?”
While her heartbeat fluttered, she hoped she kept her features impassive. She placed her hand on his cheek. “Your proposal is kind. Thank you, but no.”
“Dammit!” he snapped, while fire flashed in his eyes. “I’m not being kind. I’d like to marry you.”
“A week ago you wouldn’t have considered proposing. This is what you think you’re duty bound to do, and it’s generous of you. No, I’m sorry, but when I marry, I want it to be with someone I’m wildly in love with, who’s just as in love with me. You know we don’t have that relationship.” She shook her head. “No, Ryan. I knew you would propose, because I know you think you should.”
A muscle worked in his jaw and he got a piercing look in his eyes. Ashley braced for whatever he’d say next.
“We’re having a baby, which is the best possible reason to wed. Sex between us is fabulous—another dandy reason. Most times we’ve been out together, we’ve had a grand time, with the exception of breakfast this morning. We have simple backgrounds, and are in better times now, so we’re alike there,” he reminded her. While he talked, she had a suspicion he was fighting to maintain patience.
“We’re not remotely alike,” she retorted. “You’re a millionaire. I’m a wedding planner, trying to make ends meet, earn a living to support myself in the city and help my family,” she said solemnly. “And that’s just a start. There’s not one thing you’ve said that has changed my opinion. We have lust between us and that’s no basis to wed. We’re having a baby, but a sham marriage won’t do anything to make our child’s life better. The few times we’ve been together, we’ve gotten along, but they’re very few and not enough to tell how we’d do in the long haul. A pleasant time over dinner means nothing. We’re not getting our lives entangled so you can run things. You’re accustomed to control, but that isn’t the way this is going to go,” she declared, determined to resist him, although a nagging inner voice urged her to accept his offer.
“I don’t think you’re taking into consideration what would be best for our baby.”
She drew a deep breath as she gazed at him. “My baby needs loving parents. I want the man I marry to be my best friend, as well as my lover.”
“I qualify on half of that.”
“The least important half,” she said. “Ryan, as I said, you’re a take-charge person and I don’t want that. I’m having this baby. I don’t want to marry you out of desperation. An unhappy marriage won’t be any plus for a baby.”
“What makes you think it’ll be unhappy?”
“I don’t know that it will. But I also don’t know that it’ll be a solid marriage.”
He placed his hands on her shoulders again. “You think about what I can do for our baby. I can give it my name, so it will be a Warner and entitled to Warner money. There’ll be more than ample funds for education and travel and nannies. There’ll be a father on the scene. You can’t just dismiss all that without giving it due thought and consideration.”
