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‘Will!’
He raised his head and looked at me, dazed, and I saw he was moments away from being crushed. He saw it too, and scrambled to his feet, and I grabbed his hand and pulled him away a bare second before the van crashed onto its side. We stood there, both of us staring at the van, and then at each other. Will opened his mouth to say something, but instead turned back to the van that had chuntered into silence. We were both breathing hard and I realised, at the same moment Will did, that we were still holding hands. He didn’t let go.
Instead he said in an awed voice, ‘I think you might have just saved my life.’
It gave me a strange feeling to realise he was right. On the other hand …‘Well, it was my fault you crashed. Will Mr Markham fire you for this?’
‘No, I’m too good at my job.’
I was about to tease him about his lack of modesty, but such was his confidence I was certain he was justified in it. ‘What will you do now?’
‘Walk.’
I stared at him, and he stared back, and then, out of nowhere we both erupted into laughter. It sounded wonderful in the summer air, free from hysteria, and unforced, and Will was still smiling as he stood back and let go of my hand.
He walked around to the back of the van and grimaced, then glanced at me curiously before bending to pick up one of the empty boxes that had fallen out. ‘Why are you walking alone, anyway?’
‘Mother was getting a headache.’
He blinked. ‘I’m sorry?’
‘I was driving her to distraction, as usual, pacing up and down.’ I went to help him and, with an odd mixture of pique and amusement I realised he wasn’t going to say, “No, Miss Evangeline, you mustn’t.” I hid my own smile as I dragged an empty box out of the ditch and placed it on top of the one he had laid beside him.
‘What prompted all the pacing?’ he asked.
It did sound silly, and petulant, even to my own ears, and I sighed; ‘It’s my birthday in two days. I’m expected to take a maid, although I don’t want one.’
‘It certainly looks as though you don’t need one,’ he observed, as I helped him lift another box.
I gave him a wry look. ‘Apparently it has little to do with ability, and everything to do with tradition. Besides, Mother says I won’t have Alice to help out any more, since we’re going to be having a lot more house guests from now on.’
‘Finding you a husband?’
‘Don’t, please!’
He leaned on the underneath of the van. ‘So you’ll be eighteen then,’ he said, and the way his eyes locked onto mine was both unnerving and deeply, viscerally, exciting.
‘Yes. Mother wanted me to have Ruth Wilkins.’ He winced, and I couldn’t help laughing. ‘Do you know her?’
‘Not as well as Frank Markham does,’ he said. ‘The two of them have been carrying on at least for as long as I’ve known him, probably much longer.’
Clearly none of the other staff were aware of this or Ruth would have had her marching orders, good worker or not. But I was trying to appear a woman of the world, and so I tried not to let my surprise and distaste show. ‘Well, I don’t like her,’ I said.
‘You’re a good judge of character then. I don’t think even Mr Markham likes her, particularly.’
I didn’t want to think about Ruth; the more I heard the more I realised I’d had a lucky escape. ‘I’ve made my choice anyway,’ I said, still pleased with it, ‘and it’s most certainly not Ruth. It’s the new scullery maid.’
‘Lizzy Parker?’
‘Just Lizzy.’ He looked puzzled, and I grinned. ‘It doesn’t matter. Yes, Lizzy Parker. She seems a lively sort, and I’m sure we’ll get on famously.’
‘She’s an angel,’ he agreed, and I was ashamed to feel a tingle of jealousy at his warm familiarity, but when I glanced at him he was looking back at me with an odd look on his face and I didn’t think Lizzy was on his mind at all at that moment.
Something about that look made me ask, ‘How old are you, Will?’
‘Older than you think, probably,’ he said. ‘Most people think I’m about twenty.’
‘I thought that.’
‘I was twenty-five last January.’
I studied him closely, noting, for the first time, the way he held himself; there was none of the gawky awkwardness of a young man just growing into his body, he was comfortable and at ease with his own strength. He was having an increasingly unsettling effect on me and I sought refuge in teasing.
‘That seems a little older that I’d have expected for a butcher’s boy,’ I observed, hoping the flush did not show as vividly as it felt.
Will moved a step closer. ‘I’m no boy, Evie.’ He brushed his hand over my wrist, and we both watched as my fingers and his twined together, capturing each other in wordless acceptance of the attraction between us. Once again we each sought something to say, our eyes still on our linked hands as if they might say it for us. Will took a deep breath, and his free hand rose to my face, but before he could speak again we heard an alarmed, childlike voice from the other side of the van.
‘Mr Markham? Are you all right?’
We froze, staring at each other. My mind raced; Lawrence was decent enough, for a brother, but if he saw Will and me together by the stricken van he might easily let something slip during his inevitable telling of the story later.
Will leaned in close, and his breath brushed warm on my cheek as he whispered, ‘I’ll tell you more about my life one day, and how I came to be working for Markham. If you’d like that?’
‘I would.’ We both took a step back, and I smoothed down my skirt with hands that shook and still felt Will’s warmth. Lawrence was still on the other side of the van and hadn’t seen us, so I moved away, stepping over a patch of mud. My foot came down short of my intended spot, and I slipped. Quick as lightning Will’s hand was at my waist, steadying me, and I caught my breath, hoping he would keep it there. But with Lawrence so close it would have been foolish to risk him seeing us, and Will let go of me as soon as my footing was secure once more. I wondered if he felt the same twinge of disappointment as I did.
There was no possible way to avoid being seen; Lawrence was having a good look around the van and it mustn’t seem as if we were hiding. Ignoring Will’s horrified look I stepped out into the road, in full view.
‘Lawrence! Thank goodness.’ His face, open and honest and very young for fifteen years old, went blank with astonishment at seeing me there. ‘I’m afraid I’ve caused a terrible accident,’ I went on. ‘Luckily no one was hurt, but it’s entirely my fault Mr Davies crashed the van.’
‘Yours? How?’
‘I wasn’t paying attention, and walked right out in front of him. If he hadn’t been so quick he might have run me over.’
Lawrence looked awestruck. He was a sweet boy and I felt bad for deceiving him, but this was an event he would be telling everyone about for some time, and I couldn’t risk asking him to keep quiet about my being here, he was too excited.
‘It wasn’t entirely your fault, Miss,’ Will said, emerging from behind the van to stand behind me. I couldn’t see his face, but he had managed to inject a note of annoyance into his voice and it was hard not to smile.
‘Oh, you’re too kind, Mr Davies, but it was.’ I turned to him. Sure enough he was scowling, but I was close enough to see the flicker of amusement in his eyes, and the dimple came and went quickly. ‘You must be very shaken. Come back to the house, Mrs Hannah will be pleased to make you a warm drink.’
‘Thank you, Miss. Sir.’ Will nodded at Lawrence, who smiled at the address. He would have to get used to it; he was heir to Oaklands after all, and people would soon be accepting him as more than just “the little boy at the Manor”.
Will and I were careful to keep our distance as we walked back up the long driveway, allowing Lawrence to walk between us and ask Will all kinds of questions, about the van, and about driving in particular. Remembering Will’s fierce concentration as he drove, I was sure I could have answered those questions with more detail, and certainly more enthusiasm, but I let them chatter, and instead concentrated on the way my feelings towards Will had intensified during my time away. It was impossible to ignore the way he’d looked at me just before Lawrence had arrived and, while it might be socially unacceptable, there was no longer any doubt in my mind that Will and myself had a path to travel together at some point.
I reluctantly let Lawrence take charge of directing Will to the kitchens, and found Mother in the hall saying goodbye to Uncle Jack. Because of his government work he was often away for long stretches of time, and he didn’t even live with us, but it was difficult to remember that and always a wrench when he left. This time though, I knew he would be back in time for my party on Saturday, which made it easier to see him off cheerfully. I wished I was going too, and that we could both stay away until after Saturday; as excited as I was, part of me still dreaded this party and the way my life would change after it.
Although my birthday was on Friday, the Saturday-to-Monday that followed would be when I was presented with my birthright, the Kalteng Star. Most thought it a thing of beauty: a blue diamond mined by the first of the wealthy Creswells at the turn of the last century, and upon which all future family wealth was built. But all it represented to me was discord and upset. Our family, and our distant cousins, the Wingfields, had been at loggerheads for years over that stone, and on Saturday I would become its sole custodian. I wouldn’t even own it, it was simply mine to use, to create more wealth, until the last Creswell heir died, taking the family name with him. Beautiful, yes, set as it was into a plain gold band and worn on a fine chain, but still it was destined to bring nothing but pain, until it passed out of our lives forever. That day could not come soon enough.
Putting it out of my mind for now, I followed Mother and Uncle Jack out to the front door again and tried not to look around for Will – it was strange knowing he was in the house talking to other people, and I felt a new twinge of envy for those who ensnared his attention now.
Uncle Jack hugged me goodbye. He really was more like a father than my own had been, and I looked forward to his return; he seemed to bring a breath of adventure and mystery with him every time, and I enjoyed our long discussions, even though they almost always turned heated. Maybe even because of that. He never underestimated my intelligence the way most of Mother’s friends did, and while we disagreed on many things, including my intention to adopt the purple, green and white uniform of the Suffragette, he never once made me wish I had not expressed an opinion at all.
I didn’t know how he would feel about my latest decision, though, so I waited until we were all standing in the sunlight outside the front door and he would have less time to retract his suggestion. On the other hand, if he left before I had mother’s agreement, I would have no ally at all. Simon was lifting the familiar, single bag into the back of the Silver Ghost, and the August sun glinted off the metal as he closed the door. It was now or never.
‘I have decided who I’d like as my maid,’ I announced.
Mother turned to me, a look of wary hope on her face. ‘I don’t suppose you’ve seen sense about Ruth?’
I shook my head. ‘I thought about Mary Deegan.’
‘Ah yes, now she would be an excellent choice,’ Mother said, and her voice turned warm, but I was about to ruin this rare moment of approval.
‘She would, but she’s such a good housemaid, I thought it might be hard to replace her.’
‘That’s true,’ Mother said. I saw Uncle Jack looking at me with a little lift to his eyebrow; he had guessed I was going to say something unexpected and was waiting, with clear amusement, to see what it was.
‘I’ve decided I want to ask Lizzy Parker,’ I said. Another glance at Uncle Jack showed a brief look of surprise, quickly followed by understanding, and then a smile.
‘Lizzy Parker,’ Mother mused. Then her eyebrows shot up into her hairline. ‘The scullery maid? What do you know about her? She’s only been here for a month.’
‘Six months,’ I pointed out. ‘And we did meet once, on the day I came back from London. I’m sure if I ask Mrs Cavendish I’ll hear nothing but good reports about her.’
‘She did seem polite and well-mannered,’ Uncle Jack put in. Mother looked at him in surprise and he explained how we’d offered Lizzy a ride home. ‘I got the impression she, ah…’ he broke off and his mouth twitched a little bit, ‘she seems to have a burning desire to do well.’
It was an odd thing to say, but he didn’t elaborate. ‘Anyway, I liked her,’ I said to Mother, ‘and you told me to choose carefully. Well, I have.’
Mother was, thankfully, too distracted with other things to argue. ‘Very well, if you insist. I will speak to her on Saturday morning.’
Our attention was drawn to the quiet click of the tall wooden gate that led into the kitchen gardens, and Will nodded respectfully before striding off down the drive. My brother rounded the corner of the house, calling out to his new hero, and that envy flickered again as Will turned, smiled at Lawrence, and waited for him to catch up. Mother frowned and started to protest at the way her son was behaving with the tradesman, and I hurriedly kissed Uncle Jack goodbye and went back indoors, wondering how long it would be before that breathtaking smile was once more directed at me. Wondering, too, about what Will had been about to say before Lawrence’s arrival had stopped him.
My birthday party, and Lizzy’s first day as my maid, blurred into a mess of riding, dressing, catching the envious eyes of family members – particularly the Wingfields – as they watched Uncle Jack hang the wretched blue diamond around my neck, and the relief that I had, without doubt, made the right choice in Lizzy. She was attentive, gentle and funny, and with a sharp intelligence that I already knew would question everything, weigh up the answers, and then reach her own conclusions anyway. A girl after my own heart, and, despite what Mother had said, I knew she would be a good friend.
Shortly afterwards, when all the fuss had died down, my thoughts turned once again to the man who had laughingly dubbed himself “Lord William”. I tried to convince myself I’d been wrong about that path we were to travel, that he was a distraction, nothing more, but even as I acknowledged it I felt my heart squeeze a little at the thought of his hand on my wrist, his breath on my skin, and his voice, low and soft, speaking my name. Distraction or otherwise, the need to see him again was growing, and it was something I could not ignore.
It was market day in Breckenhall.Sitting in my room, looking out at the sunshine and at Lawrence larking about with our cousins on the tennis court, I knew I couldn’t wait a moment longer, and changed into the plainest of my dresses, left a note for Lizzy and, unable to find anyone to drive me, I walked into town.
Despite my eagerness I moderated my pace, deliberately keeping my mind on banal things; diary appointments, the next time I might ride to hounds, and what to buy Lawrence for his birthday. As I drew closer to town, however, my feet began to overtake my patience, and when I began hearing the sounds of the busy market drifting down the road it was all I could do not to break into a run. Once in the square I steadied myself, feeling the heat in my skin that I tried to tell myself was just a result of my fast walk. Will was manning Mr Markham’s stall, urging customers to go across to the shop before all the best cuts were sold, and after the first lurch of excitement at seeing him I held back and watched him. I enjoyed hearing the laughter of the crowds as he kept up a running line of banter, folding small bits of paper into intriguing shapes to give to the children. Word had spread from the delighted recipients to their friends, and there was a small queue waiting; I watched his hands, busy at work as he spoke to his customers, hardly sparing a glance downwards, utterly confident in his creations.
Eventually he looked around and saw me, and the look on his face jolted me severely. I had hoped for a smile, one of those grins that lit up his face, but he looked as if someone had reached into his chest and stolen his breath. His words faltered and he gave the crowd a distracted smile, but his eyes were pulled back to mine again immediately. I felt my own heart stuttering, and couldn’t look away, no matter what propriety dictated. His patter faded and the small group dispersed, so I made my way over to the stall and, making sure he was still looking, stepped between the backdrop and the high wall of the town hall. A moment later he was there and before I had time to blink I was in his arms. I’m no boy, Evie…I knew it for certain when he held me, and the way he breathed my name made me tremble.
‘Lord William,’ I murmured in return, and felt him laugh. I pulled back and looked up into his face, suddenly shy. ‘I didn’t know if you…I mean –’
‘Does this reassure you?’ He lowered his face to kiss me, and the rest of the world slipped away to become nothing more than a background hum and a vague awareness of a breeze in my hair. Will’s lips were gentle but firm as they moved over mine, and my mouth opened without any conscious decision on my part. Our hands moved restlessly as they sought a closer hold, and as the kiss deepened I felt the sharp, hard nip of his teeth and returned it.
When we finally broke apart, both more than a little shaken by the intensity of the moment, he stepped back and raised a questioning eyebrow. With an effort, I remembered the question.
‘Well, yes,’ I said, a little breathlessly. ‘That was very reassuring indeed.’
He smiled and leaned in for another kiss, a softer one this time, our lips barely brushing. ‘Good.’ Then he made a small sound of annoyance and glanced at his pocket watch. ‘Frank will be over in a moment. Quick, when can I see you again?’
He peeked out from our hiding place to check both the stall and the imminent arrival of his employer, and I thought fast. ‘I ride alone when I can. Up behind Oaklands and towards the quarry. I try to go out on Sundays, usually as soon as I’ve changed after church, and stay out until teatime if the weather’s dry.’
Will touched my cheek and I leaned into his hand. ‘Well, there’s a rare bit of luck; Sundays are my afternoons off. I’ll be waiting by the quarry after lunch.’ He frowned slightly, but it was a happy kind of puzzlement. ‘I know this is ridiculous, but I have the vague suspicion I might have fallen for you.’
‘Ridiculous,’ I agreed, but my eyes stayed on his and I felt the pull between us, impossible to ignore. I daren’t press my lips to his again, for fear we’d become lost in time, so I let them linger against his jaw instead. It was almost as hard to break away. ‘This has to be our secret, for a while at least.’
He nodded. ‘It’s not that I’m ashamed of you,’ he said solemnly, ‘but, you know, a man of my social position has his reputation to consider.’ I cuffed his arm and he smiled. ‘Don’t worry, I won’t tell a soul.’
‘One day we’re going to be able to tell everyone and not think for one minute they wouldn’t approve,’ I said. ‘Things are definitely changing.’
He studied me for a moment. ‘I hope you’re right, I honestly do. In the meantime, not a word, I promise.’
‘Not a word,’ I repeated, and he drew me close again, his hands locked in the small of my back, only the contented sigh stirring my hair telling me his happiness matched my own.
Five months later he was holding me again, but neither of us was happy.
Chapter Four (#ulink_598a2296-d591-5b0e-9851-9ba913cce93d)
Breckenhall Quarry, January 1913.
On New Year’s Eve, my worst fears about the Kalteng Star had come true. It had gone missing during the huge party mother had thrown, and although I’d fully believed in my own desire to be rid of it, the shock rippled through all of us. Mother was obviously distraught, although to others I knew she made a vast effort to appear coldly calm, and I felt the guilt lying over me like a terrible weight throughout the fruitless search.
But in the end the blame had fallen squarely on Lizzy, and nothing we had been able to do had persuaded the jury otherwise. The so-called evidence had built and built, and I had watched even her fiery determination crumple in the face of it, until she stood, shaking and helpless while they delivered the verdict.
Mary Deegan, who had formed a closeness with Lizzy from her first day, had defied etiquette and put her arm around me as the words fell like rocks into the silence, and Lizzy had looked back at us both as they’d taken her down. Her face was white and stunned, her eyes looked bigger and bluer than ever in contrast as she no doubt prayed for a last minute intervention, and then she was gone, to begin a ten-year prison sentence in Holloway Women’s Prison, London.
We returned to Oaklands in silence. Mary was fighting tears but she wouldn’t let them fall in front of me. That was another way in which she and Lizzy were different; had it been the other way around I know Lizzy would have been unable to control her distress. But I could tell Mary wanted to be alone, and so, after a brief word of mutual comfort, and a heartfelt promise to do everything I could to get Lizzy freed, I let her go and went to my own rooms to try and make sense of what had happened.
I had not gone downstairs at all that night, and Mother had not tried to persuade me. She too was in a state of shock, but for her it was more to do with the loss of the Kalteng Star than the terrible injustice that had befallen my friend. She told me Ruth would take up Lizzy’s position first thing in the morning and I nodded, too wrung out to argue. I fell into bed, and lay awake with burning eyes until the early hours, wondering what Lizzy was doing and if she was all right.
When I awoke from a shallow and unsatisfactory sleep, I had taken advantage of the fact that I was temporarily without a formal maid to leave the house unnoticed. I asked the stable-boy Billy to saddle Orion, and rode up to the quarry. Even though it wasn’t a Sunday I knew Will would not let me down. Sure enough he was there, and clearly had been for some time; he was freezing cold and shivering in the biting January wind, and came down the hill to meet me. I slid off Orion and into his arms, and we clung together, leaning into the buffeting wind while I wept out all the anger and despair I’d kept hidden in front of everyone else. When I eventually wiped my eyes, he took my hand and we walked in silence up the hill, over the wet grass, to the big rock at the top.
‘I’m so sorry I wasn’t there yesterday,’ he said as we sat down, heedless of the puddles in the uneven surface. ‘Markham said he wanted to go to support Ruth, if you ever did, and someone had to keep the shop open.’
I shook my head, dismissing the apology. ‘I knew that diamond was going to cause upset. I told Lizzy so myself the night I got it.’
‘Who do you think really stole it?’
‘I have no idea. I would suspect the Wingfield boys if they hadn’t been seen elsewhere at the time.’
‘What about their mother, Clarissa, isn’t it?’
‘She was questioned by the police, and lots of people saw her too.’ I sighed; it had all been going around and around in my head for so long I was dizzy with it. ‘I’m going to write to Uncle Jack as soon as I get home. He works for the government, he must be able to do something.’
‘Darling, he’s a diplomat, he’s not part of the –’
‘It doesn’t matter! I have to do something!’
Will pulled me against him and tucked my head beneath his chin. ‘I’m sorry. Yes, you’re right, he might at least know someone who can help.’
