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To Love and Protect
To Love and Protect
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To Love and Protect

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“Not since high school,” she protested.

“Any nights alone except by choice?”

She considered the question. “Not really.”

“So you’re a player, too.”

“Okay. Sometimes. Guys are easy.”

“Yeah, and nobody gets close.”

She stared at him. How did he know that? Keeping men at arm’s length was something she did well, and she couldn’t always say why. Sometimes she wondered if she didn’t want to fall in love or if she was just afraid of feeling too much.

The waiter returned with the credit card and the receipt. David signed it and pocketed his copy. As he put away his card, he studied her.

“I have eight hours until I have to head for the airport. Want to keep me company for the rest of my last day on American soil?”

She had a thousand things she should be doing and right this second she couldn’t think of even one.

“Sure, but what about your family? Don’t you have to do the goodbye thing?”

“Did it last night. There was a big party.” He rose and held out his hand. “Wish you could have been there.”

“Me, too.”

She stood and tucked her hand in his. His fingers laced with hers.

Liz felt the heat sizzle between them. Her chest tightened, and there was a definite tingle rippling through her thighs. Talk about lousy timing.

They walked along the river until a cold wind forced them indoors, then they settled next to each other in the corner booth of a coffeehouse. The hours slipped by and they couldn’t seem to stop talking.

“Everyone tried to talk me out of pursuing this as a career,” Liz said with a shrug. “Except Nana, but she believed I could do anything. If I hadn’t won the grant right before graduating, I don’t know that I would have had the courage to make a go of my art.”

She laughed. “Art. That sounds so pretentious. It makes me feel that I should be wearing a black turtleneck and talking about the blindness of the masses. Then I remember I’m part of the masses.”

David rubbed his thumb across her knuckles. Her skin was smooth and pale. No freckles, no flaws at all. She had small hands with slender fingers. Sensibly short nails, he thought. No flashy polish, no rings. The plainness of her hands was at odds with the dangling earrings and charm-bracelet watch.

But he liked that the same way he liked her quick smile and easy laughter. He turned her hand over and traced the lines there.

“Which one is the life line?” he asked.

“I have no idea. I hope it’s the really long one. I have a lot of things on my to-do list and I need time.”

“You’ll make it,” he said with a confidence he couldn’t explain.

“Can I have that in writing?”

“Sure.”

He stared into her eyes. There were a thousand shades of green in her irises. Even more variations on red, gold and auburn in her hair. With his other hand, he reached up and tucked a loose strand behind her ear. He let his fingers linger, and her breath caught.

“David, this is crazy.”

“Tell me about it.”

He had to be at the airport by nine. He was already packed, with his luggage in the trunk of his rental car, but instead of thinking about his job and the opportunity he’d been offered, all he could wonder was how he and Liz could be alone together for more than the next couple of hours.

“Tell me more about your family,” she said. “What was it like growing up with a twin sister?”

“You really want to talk about that?” he asked.

Her mouth parted. “We have to talk about something.”

“Why?”

“Because if we don’t—”

Instead of waiting to hear what would happen if they didn’t, he kissed her. A handful of customers filled the coffeehouse. Several college students were having a heated debate on the economy, and an old man sat by himself reading the paper. David didn’t care about any of them. Right now there was only this moment, this woman and how her mouth felt against his.

She was soft and warm, melting into him as her lips returned the soft, chaste kiss he’d offered. Heat flared, as did desire.

She smelled like flowers, clean skin, sunshine and something that could only be Liz herself. Her fingers clung to his where they held hands. Her free arm wrapped around his neck, pulling him closer.

He released her hand and pulled her hard against him. Sitting next to her, he knew, it would be difficult to touch her everywhere, but he wanted to try. He wanted to feel her breasts pressing against his chest and know the weight of her body on top of his. Need filled him, making him ache. He was hard and ready, and damn it all to hell if he didn’t have a plane to catch.

“This is crazy,” Liz whispered when he pulled back. “We just met.”

He was pleased to see that her eyes were dilated and her breathing just as fast as his own.

“Some things don’t take very long,” he said. “When they happen fast, they’re usually right.”

She shook her head. “I don’t know. I’ve never reacted this way. Have you?”

He brushed his mouth against hers. “No. Not even close.”

She shivered. “Hold me. Hold me for as much time as we have left. Please.”

He tugged her close and draped his arm around her shoulders. They talked some, kissed some and mostly watched time slip away. At a little past eight, they walked out to the parking lot and got in his rental car. He headed back to the Children’s Connection parking lot where they’d left her car.

Liz couldn’t believe how sad she felt. She’d only known David a few hours, but it seemed more like a lifetime. The thought of him going away, of never seeing him again, broke her heart.

When he pulled up beside her aging sedan, she turned to him. “Do you really have to go?” she asked softly.

He put the car in Park and faced her. “It’s my job, Liz. I’ve been working for this assignment since the day they hired me.”

She ducked her head. “I know. That was silly. If anyone understands giving it all for a career, it’s me. But I just…”

“Me, too.” He touched her chin, raising her head so she looked at him. “I can’t decide if we should stay in touch or make a clean break.”

“I don’t know, either.”

Her chest tightened until it was difficult to breathe. She wanted him—not just sexually, but in so many other ways. She wanted to learn everything about him. She wanted to meet his family and talk about goals and have dates and fights and make memories. If it wasn’t completely crazy, she would swear she’d fallen for him.

“Take me with you,” she said impulsively. “To Russia.”

He cupped her jaw. “You don’t know how that tempts me, Liz. We could keep each other warm through the long winter.”

It could work, she thought frantically. As a freelance illustrator, she didn’t have to punch a time clock. “I could work from there and send my drawings back to my clients,” she told him. “It would take me a couple of days to wrap things up here but I could—”

He silenced her with a kiss. The sweet pressure of his mouth told her his answer even as she struggled not to believe him. Her eyes began to burn.

“I know, it’s crazy,” she whispered.

“But a great dream.”

A dream. That was what this was. A beautiful, perfect dream that could never be real. Take off for Russia? For a guy? Never. Not that David wasn’t great, but what did she know about him?

Torn between what was sensible and what her heart cried out to claim, Liz opened the passenger door and forced herself to slide out into the night.

“Thank you for a terrific afternoon, David Logan,” she said as she fought tears. “I don’t think it could get better than this. We should probably keep the memory intact and not try to repeat it.”

He nodded. “You’re right. But if you ever find yourself in Moscow…”

“I’ll look you up. And when you’re back in Portland, you do the same.”

“Right.”

She stared at him, at his face, his eyes. She was making the right decision. They both were.

“You’re not the one who got away,” she said firmly.

“Neither are you.”

As she closed the car door, she knew they were both lying.

Two

Nearly five years later

D avid Logan generally avoided recreational social events at the embassy. His work required more than enough cocktail parties at which he either had to keep his eye on someone dangerous or extract information without the person in question knowing. He no longer found the endless chatter relaxing or fun. Give him a good covert kidnapping or prisoner extraction any day.

But tonight was different. Even though it was his day off, he found himself nodding politely to people he’d seen at events like this a dozen times before and making inane conversation with spouses of staff members. Even as he explained a point of baseball to a security operative from the British embassy, he kept his eye on the circulating crowd. Nearly thirty American tourists had been invited to the evening’s festivities, including one Elizabeth Duncan from Portland, Oregon.

Liz had finally made it to Russia.

He knew her visit had nothing to do with him—they hadn’t been in contact since they’d parted company the evening he’d flown to Moscow. Still, he’d come to the party with the hope of catching a glimpse of her. Maybe more than a glimpse. He wanted to look at her, talk to her, find out what was different and what was the same.

Funny how after all this time he could remember everything about their time together. While he wasn’t willing to admit she was the one who got away, he would claim a certain interest. He’d never forgotten her. Would she be able to say the same about him?

He concluded his conversation with the British security operative and made his way to the bar. As he crossed the large, crowded room, he glanced toward the entrance and saw a group of Americans standing there.

They wore their nationality as easily as their formal clothing, something that would surprise most of them. His time in Russia had taught David to size up a person in a matter of seconds, and he recognized the well-dressed, well-fed posture of relatively successful Westerners. A few were in Moscow as tourists, some had come to adopt children, and a couple were here for work.

The crowd parted, allowing him a view of a beautiful redhead in a black gown. He wasn’t close enough to see the color of her eyes, but he remembered. A vivid green. He also recalled her curiosity, her humor and her drive.

“Champagne,” he said to the bartender. “Two.”

After collecting the glasses, he made his way through the crowd.

Liz stood talking to a couple in their late thirties. She’d piled her hair on top of her head, which left her neck bare to view. David wanted to move close enough to brush that pale skin with a kiss. Okay, maybe he wanted to do a lot more than that. The slender straps holding up the dress offered possibilities.

“Down, boy,” he murmured to himself as he made his way closer. He was acting as if he hadn’t been with a woman since he and Liz had parted, but that wasn’t true. There had been plenty. Still, none of them had been her.

“Liz?”

He spoke her name quietly. She had her back to him and when she heard the single word she stilled, then slowly turned.

The action gave him a view of her profile first, then her whole face. Humor and surprise and excitement danced in her large green eyes. Her full lips curved up in a smile that both welcomed and beckoned. Heat sizzled, then arced between them.

“David Logan,” she said, her voice exactly as he remembered. “I’d wondered if you were still haunting the halls of the Moscow state department.”

She’d thought of him. The news pleased him more than it should have.

He handed her a glass of champagne. “Here I am,” he told her. “Welcome to Moscow.”

She touched her glass to his and sipped. “Thank you,” she said. “Oh, let me introduce you to—”

She glanced over her shoulder and saw the couple she’d been talking to had discreetly faded into the party. Liz turned back to him.

“I guess I’ll do the introduction thing later.”

“If you’d like.”

He didn’t care if he never talked to anyone else. Liz was the one who interested him.

“It’s been a long time,” he said.

“Nearly five years.” She smiled. “Hmm, maybe I shouldn’t have admitted to knowing the amount of time. Does that sound like I was pining?”

“No. Were you?”

Her smile widened. “Not all the time. And you?”

“When I saw your name on the guest list, I knew I had to come by and see you again.”

“Here I am.”

He glanced at the elegant dress that skimmed her gorgeous curves before settling just above her ankles. Her large, dangling silver earrings had been replaced with gold-and-diamond studs. He recognized the brand of her watch and the air of confidence around her.