Accidental Reunion

But now it was time for change.

‘I know you don’t want her to go into a home. But, Lila, your mum…’ She struggled for the words to describe the shell that remained of what had once been an elegant, eloquent woman. ‘Your mum wouldn’t know any different.’

‘But I’d know. Mum would hate the—’

‘She’d hate the fact you’ve given up your life to look after her,’ Shirley interrupted. ‘She’d hate the fact you work so hard and then come home at the end of a long night just to start all over again. Hate the fact you hardly ever go out.’

Lila searched for an answer. The last thing she wanted to do was make this horrible situation worse for Shirley, to make her feel guilty for saying the words most people would have said years ago. But a home…

‘Now, Ted’s retirement isn’t going to happen for a couple of months yet. We don’t have to make any decision today, Lila, but we are going to have to soon.’ She smiled through her tears at her niece. ‘I’m not definitely saying your mum has to go into a home; I’m saying I can’t be here as much to help. My back is starting to hurt—lifting her, turning her. I just don’t see an end to it. You understand where I’m coming from, don’t you, Lila?’

Lila made her way around the table to hug her aunt as she spoke. ‘Of course I do.’ She swallowed back her own tears. ‘And I promise I’ll come up with something.’

‘I know you will, pet. What worries me is what you’ll come up with. You’re thirty-one years old now, Lila—you can’t let your life slip by like this. It’s not good for any of us, least of all your mother. Look, I’ve probably said too much for one day already. Why don’t you head off to bed, darling, try and get some sleep?’

Lila nodded, but as she reached the door she turned. ‘Shirley, there’s some forms I need to drop off at the hospital before five. Would you be able to watch Mum for me?’

‘Of course, darling.’

Alone in her room, Lila pulled the application forms out of her bag. It had never really entered her head to apply, but Hester’s words had made the chance of promotion a real possibility. Now, with Shirley’s bombshell…Closing her eyes, Lila tried to search for answers. How could she possibly afford a carer to stay with Elizabeth while she went out to work? It would be more cost effective to go on the dole and nurse her mum full time herself.

But…She felt a tinge of panic hit. How could she give up her job? OK, she wasn’t the best nurse in the world, and she moaned like everyone else about the shortages and workload, but she truly loved her job—loved the people, loved the escape work gave her from her everyday problems. How could she even begin to think about giving it up?

Clicking her pen open, she started to work her way through the endless forms. If she was going to have to employ someone to help her look after her mother, a decent wage was more important now than ever.

If there was any consolation to be had from the day’s events, it was that Lila didn’t have time to dwell on Declan’s return. Any other time it would have completely overwhelmed her, but not today. Today was a day for filling out forms, working out figures, planning a future—not dwelling on the past, imagining days long since gone, a time when Declan had been beside her.

A time when life had been easy.

* * *

Hester took the forms without a word, which made Lila’s journey to the hospital somewhat of an anticlimax. Only when she returned home and fed Elizabeth her supper, then settled her into bed for the night, did Lila’s stomach suddenly tighten at the thought of seeing Declan again tonight.

Maybe she did tie up her hair more neatly and apply her make-up just a little bit more carefully, but it was more a matter of personal pride than vanity. She certainly wasn’t going to allow Declan to think even for a minute that she had let herself go.

That was a joke. Eyeing her reflection in the mirror, Lila paused a moment. Her naturally thick blonde hair was as glossy as ever, her figure still trim. But the sparkle in her blue eyes was long since gone, and a quick slick of mascara and a neutral lipstick replaced the immaculate glossy make-up of yesteryear.

‘Well, what did you expect?’ Lila scolded herself. ‘You’re not a flight attendant now.’ It had been easy to look stunning then, with cheap access to the world’s best cosmetics, advice from the airline’s stylists, her nails and hair done weekly. And, Lila thought reluctantly, she was eight years older now—eight long years. Of course her skin wasn’t going to be quite as clear. She was the wrong side of thirty now, not some twenty-something beauty.

Poking her tongue out at her reflection, Lila caught sight of the clock on her dressing-table. With a yelp of dismay she pulled on her shoes and grabbed her bag, just stopping to give her mother and Shirley a quick kiss before she torpedoed out of the front door and into her car.

So much for making a good impression on Hester!

* * *

For once the department was quiet, with just a few patients waiting to be seen by various specialists or awaiting their turn for X-rays. As soon as the day staff had gone Lila pulled the kettle round to the nurses’ station.

‘Might as well get our caffeine levels up while we’ve got the chance.’ She grinned.

‘Good idea.’ Yvonne Selles walked over. ‘It’s Lila, isn’t it?’

‘That’s right. How can I help you, Dr Selles? Apart from the coffee, I mean?’

‘Please, call me Yvonne. I’m expecting a direct admission from a nursing home. I wasn’t quite sure of the procedure as my ward is full, so I’ve asked the ambulance to bring her directly to Emergency. I hope that’s all right.’

‘That’s fine. Thanks for letting us know. What’s wrong with the patient?’

‘Pressure sores, along with dehydration. I shouldn’t have accepted her really, as I haven’t got any beds left, but according to the GP she’s in a bit of a mess and I could hardly refuse to take her. Her GP was pretty upset the home didn’t call him out a lot sooner. Some of these nursing homes need to take a good long look at themselves. It seems more about profit than people these days. Sorry.’ Yvonne gave a thin smile. ‘I’ll get off my soapbox now. It just gets to me sometimes.’

‘I know,’ Lila said softly, swallowing a lump in her own throat. ‘It gets to me, too. Anyway—’ she deliberately brightened her voice ‘—there’s a couple of free beds on the medical ward. If you admit the patient to Med 1 you can transfer her over to AGU tomorrow.’

‘Looking for some action, Yvonne?’ Grinning, Declan joined the group.

In an instant Lila felt as if her senses had been put on high alert. She could almost feel the breeze from him as he walked over.

‘He thinks only staff in Emergency do any work.’ Yvonne grinned. ‘Just because my patients are old, it doesn’t mean they’re not sick,’ she scolded lightly. ‘I still have to use my brain.’

Lila jumped down from her stool as Harry, the porter, wheeled a patient back from X-Ray. ‘Declan, would you mind having a quick look at these? Diana thinks it may be pneumonia and he’ll probably need to be referred on.’

‘Sure.’

With an easy smile he took the X-rays from Harry and made his way over to the viewing box.

‘Phew,’ Yvonne said. ‘It’s a different place here at night.’

‘We’re not normally this quiet,’ Sue said almost defensively.

‘I didn’t mean that.’ Yvonne smiled. ‘It’s just so much more relaxed and friendly. I was down here this afternoon and the unit manager nearly had a fit because I brought my coffee round the front.’

‘That’d be right,’ Lila groaned.

‘So how come it’s so different down here at night?’

‘Different staff,’ Lila said, climbing back onto the high stool. ‘Night staff on the whole are a lot nicer—in my opinion, of course. We’re not all pulled into the politics of days, fighting over any interesting patients, trying to look busy when it’s quiet.’ She laughed. ‘Now, who’s up on their soapbox?’

‘And what does Hester have to say about all this?’ Yvonne gestured to the tray overloaded with cups and cakes and biscuits.

‘Plenty,’ Lila admitted. ‘But I’ve told her that when she provides enough staff so that we can have our full breaks I’ll put away the running buffet, but until then it stays. Speaking of which, I’m going to have a huge slice of cake—do you fancy a piece?’

‘Just a small one, and then I’d better get on and do some work.’

‘Where were you before you worked here?’ Lila asked, plunging a knife into a vast walnut cake.

‘Home—Scotland,’ Yvonne added.

‘So what brings you to Melbourne?’

Yvonne shrugged. ‘I just fancied a change, a few personal reasons.’

‘Declan was saying he worked in Scotland for a while,’ Sue commented as the knife Lila was holding froze in the cake.

‘He’s one of the personal reasons,’ Yvonne said lightly.

‘You worked with him there.’ Suddenly Lila’s voice was strangely high.

‘A bit more than that,’ Yvonne admitted, and Lila saw she was blushing.

‘So you’re an item?’ Sue pushed happily, delighted to be the first with the gossip.

‘Well, we are living together,’ Yvonne admitted, blushing ever deeper as she did so. ‘So, yes, I guess we are.’

The knife was working rapidly now, slicing the cake with lightning speed. It had never even entered her head. Not for a single second. Even with Yvonne’s accent, even when Declan had mentioned he’d worked in Scotland, even the fact they’d started on the same day. Not once had it occurred to Lila that they might be together.

There just didn’t seem to be anything between them. OK, so she’d hardly seen them together, just at Yvonne’s lecture and for a couple of minutes this evening, but there was nothing that had indicated to Lila they were a couple. No stolen glances, no sexual tension, nothing. Yes, they were at work. And, yes, you didn’t have to be constantly touching to be a couple, but surely there would have been some vibe? Surely. Her mind whizzed back eight years. They could have been on the other side of the room yet there had always been an energy between them—a constant awareness that had permeated the room.

She wasn’t still hung up on Declan—it was over, over, over.

It just seemed so unfair, that was all. His life had moved on, ever onwards, while she herself seemed frozen where he’d left her. And not even there, apart from her wardrobe perhaps. Eight years ago she had been stunning, had had a great social life and a glamorous job. Eight years, five extra kilos and no social life later, that’s where Declan had found her.

‘Are you still here?’ Declan grinned at Yvonne.

The same way he grinned at everyone, everyone except her.

‘Still here. One more patient to admit and then I’ll head off home, though I think I might wait for her to arrive in the doctors’ mess and have a doze while I’m waiting. I don’t suppose you picked up milk, like I asked?’

Yvonne glanced over at Lila, an almost imperceptible flash of triumph in her eyes. She knows about us, Lila realised, and she’s making sure I know that they’re together now.

‘Of course I didn’t,’ Declan answered cheerfully, completely oblivious to the sudden tension in the tiny annex. ‘I’ve rung Chest Med, Lila,’ he said, changing the subject. ‘They want the patient sent straight up to the ward and they’ll clerk him there.’

‘I’ll go,’ Sue said, swinging down from the work bench.

But Yvonne hadn’t finished turning the knife. ‘Anything else you want me to pick up from the all-night store, Declan—anything you fancy?’

Declan laughed ‘Plenty, but let’s just leave it at milk for now, huh?’

Once Yvonne had gone Declan helped himself to a huge piece of cake. ‘Who made this?’

‘Lila,’ Sue said as she picked up the patients’ files and headed off to the ward.

‘Really?’ Declan took a tentative bite and grabbed his throat. ‘Put out a crash call, I’ve been poisoned.’

‘Very funny,’ Lila said, suddenly finding her tongue. ‘But, then, everything always was a joke to you.’

‘What’s that supposed to mean?’ Declan asked, his voice suddenly serious.

‘You know full well.’

‘No, Lila, I don’t. What have I done now?’

She shot him a look. ‘You mean apart from strolling back into my life and expecting us to be friends?’

‘Yes, Lila.’ His voice was deep and his eyes searched hers. ‘Yes, Lila,’ he repeated. ‘Apart from that.’

What could she say? That the news he was living with Yvonne had devastated her? That, though she hadn’t even realised it, she had somehow harboured a hope that maybe, just maybe there might have been a chance for them?

Of course not. She tore her eyes away. Lying was hard enough without looking at him. ‘I think I made a mistake yesterday,’ she replied finally, ‘when I said we could be friends. There’s too much water under the bridge.’

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