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Surely he’d heard the neurologist wrong. Chuck’s gut knotted. “Do you mean Shana is disoriented? Fuzzy on things like the time or date? Forgot what she had for dinner?”
After all, she’d suffered a minor aneurysm that had left her unconscious for just over thirty-six hours. The longest day and a half of his life. But finally, she was awake. Alive.
Two physicians occupied the secluded sitting area where Chuck had been brought after a staffer located him grabbing a bite in the cafeteria while a privately hired nurse sat with Shana. Chuck couldn’t believe his wife had actually woken up the one time he’d stepped away from her hospital room. The neurologist—Dr. Harris—sat beside Chuck. Another of Shana’s physicians stood at the window. Snow was coming down in thick sheets of white, as if the hospital sterility was outside as well as indoors.
“Shana is disoriented, but it’s more than that,” Dr. Harris explained slowly from the chrome-and-leather chair he’d pulled around to face Chuck. “You need to accept that she has lost her memory.”
Amnesia. The word still ricocheted around in Chuck’s brain. “She doesn’t know who she is?”
Dr. Harris closed the tablet that he’d used earlier to show the part of her brain that was affected. “Actually, she does know her name. She recalls details about herself. The memory loss focuses on more recent events.”
“How recent?” Chuck asked, unease creeping up his spine.
“She has the month correct. But five years prior.”
Five years ago? That meant... “She doesn’t remember anything about me.”
Much less about being married to him. There were some times between them lately he wouldn’t mind forgetting. But the thought of losing memories of the good times with Shana?
Unthinkable.
The two doctors exchanged somber looks before Shana’s other doctor took a seat in the other wingback. Dr. Gibson was young, but tops when it came to fertility specialists. It meant a lot to Chuck that the man had shown up to weigh in on Shana’s condition even though they weren’t trying for another baby.
“Chuck, I’m sorry to say, she does not remember you,” Dr. Gibson said in the quietly comforting tone he’d used during Chuck and Shana’s failed in vitro and three miscarriages. A phantom sucker punch to the gut wracked Chuck.
It had been bittersweet when Dr. Gibson had assisted in caring for Chuck’s stepsister two months ago, after she delivered twins in a car. Pretending nothing was wrong had been hard as hell for Chuck, and Shana hadn’t wanted his comfort.
“We were having trouble. Do you think this memory loss is more psychological than physical?”
He’d blamed himself repeatedly for this aneurysm. If they hadn’t been fighting, if intense emotions hadn’t raised her blood pressure, maybe this wouldn’t have happened.
“There’s no question she’s had an aneurysm, and she’s incredibly lucky to have come through it so well. But that’s not to say there aren’t psychological aspects in play. The body and mind work in tandem.”
Staring at the tablet in the doctor’s hand, Chuck moved toward a planter, something to rest on. “How do we proceed from here? What do we tell her, and what’s her prognosis?”
“I realize that you need answers, but it’s too early to project the long term. For now, the counselor on staff here suggests we answer questions as she asks them, no additional information,” Dr. Harris warned. “A psychiatrist will be consulting. Things are still so very new.”
The obstetrician leaned forward, elbows on his knees. “Let’s focus on the positives. Shana’s awake and physically fine. The baby’s heartbeat is strong. That’s news to celebrate.”
Chuck frowned, certain he’d misunderstood. Gibson had to be confusing patients after a late shift.
Dr. Harris straightened. “The baby?”
“What baby?” Chuck said precisely. Because no way could Shana be pregnant now of all times. The dark irony of that would be too much to entertain.
Dr. Gibson’s eyebrows shot up before he schooled his face back into an alarmingly blank expression. “She didn’t tell you about the pregnancy?”
Chuck shook his head slowly, stunned, half-certain there was an error. Fate couldn’t be this twisted.
“Shana is expecting,” he said baldly. “Two months along. And from your reaction, Chuck, she hadn’t told you yet.”
Chuck sifted through the hell of the past day and a half. There hadn’t been any need to call Dr. Gibson in on the case on a weekend. Chuck had said no to the possibility of pregnancy when the admission staff had asked.
Now he realized the truth of it. Shana had gotten pregnant without an in vitro procedure.
The reality slammed into Chuck like a ton of bricks. Against all odds, they were expecting a child.
Now.
He couldn’t even sort through the layers of “stunned” to feel anything but shock.
Chuck’s mind winged back to their attending the baptism for his sister Glenna’s daughter. He and Shana had actually spent a week getting along, drawn into their hopes for the future, loving their niece and considering adoption. Glenna clearly loved Fleur, no biological bond needed.
Emotions running high, Chuck and Shana had spent a week in bed together. A week that had apparently defied their odds and borne fruit. He had to be there for Shana and their child.
Dr. Harris opened his tablet again, scrolling through his notes. “While I wish we had known so we could have monitored the fetus, none of the medications she’s received should present a risk to the baby’s development. We’ll keep Shana another night for monitoring.”
Dr. Gibson said, “We’ll also do an ultrasound and start her on progesterone given her prior miscarriages.”
Chuck nodded, still reeling. A baby. She was two months along. She’d known and she hadn’t told him. Worse yet, she’d thrown him out without telling him she carried his child.
She’d probably realized that if she told him about the baby, it would have taken a force of nature to budge him from their house. He didn’t have the luxury of anger right now.
Dr. Gibson tilted his head, placing a hand on Chuck’s shoulder. “I realize this is difficult for you, too. You’ve both been waiting for this baby for so long, and these aren’t the circumstances anyone could have foreseen.” He gestured toward the door. “Perhaps seeing you will jog her memory.”
And therein lay his problem.
He didn’t want her to remember.
Because if she did?
Shana would walk, taking their baby with her.
* * *
Shana pushed herself up on the hospital bed, taking her time to be sure the room didn’t spin as it had the last time she’d tried. People were acting strange around her, and she wanted answers. Instead, she was stuck lying here alone with only a view of snow slamming down on the mountains.
Well, alone except for a nurse who’d been there since she’d woken up and hadn’t left her side, even when the doctors stopped by, doctors who’d been short of answers as to why she was here. Even her phone was missing and the remote control for the TV wasn’t working. The nurse said it would be fixed soon.
Shana touched her head, exploring her hairline. A small bandage was located just behind her ear. She’d been assured her long hair covered the shaved patch. The doctor had only told her she’d suffered a minor aneurysm, but that otherwise she was physically fine. Beyond that, they’d been cagey.
Thinking back, she tried to remember what had happened before she’d come to the hospital. The last thing she recalled was an argument with her mother over Shana’s refusal to reconcile with her father. Even thinking about the fight and her dad made her headache worse.
She knew avoidance when she heard it. Her work as a private detective had taught her all the signs. She also had a sixth sense for these things and trusted her gut.
Something was going on beyond what they’d told her.
Turning to the nurse, who was making updates on the dry-erase board in her room, Shana asked, “Excuse me? When will the doctor be back? I have questions.”
Being in limbo was scary. Her imagination was working overtime.
Just as the nurse opened her mouth to answer, a knock sounded and the door opened to admit a man. Not the doctor who’d been by to check her out when she’d woken. And even though it felt like a slew of staff had come through her room in the past half hour, she would have remembered this guy. He had an unforgettable face, movie-star quality in a rough-around-the-edges way. His light brown hair was just long enough to be mussed by a woman’s fingers, coarse hair that would rasp the skin.
A doctor? He didn’t have on a white coat. In fact, he was dressed more casually than any doctor she knew. He wore jeans and a long-sleeved T-shirt that bore the wrinkles of someone who’d pulled a long shift. But his sea green eyes were what held her attention in an unbreakable grip. The colors shifted with the icy intensity of a winter sea.
What crazy thoughts to be having right now, but the tug of attraction made her feel normal on a day that was entirely too abnormal.
“I appreciate that you’re all being thorough, but I need to get in touch with my mother. I just want to call her, and no one will give me a phone.”
Or a remote control. Or a mirror. Or answers.
Okay, this was getting really weird.
Strangely, the nurse left the room. Physicians usually kept a nurse with them for exams. Although the door had been left open.
“Your mother is on her way. She should be here tomorrow.” He stopped by the bed, large hands grasping the bedrail.
Before she could help herself, she checked his ring finger and found...
A wedding band.
Disappointment cooled the attraction. So much for drooling over Mr. Cover Model. She pressed her fingers to her forehead. She should be focused on more serious matters rather than this sexy distraction.
“Which doctor are you?” She settled on the reasonable question, a thousand more zipping around in her fuzzy brain.
“You should rest,” he said evasively. “You’ve been through a lot. Your body needs to recharge.”
“Aren’t you a doctor?” She massaged her temple. “Or an occupational therapist? I can’t recall. There were so many people in the room when I woke up.”
“I’m not your doctor.”
A nervous skitter started up her spine, like something shifting behind a mist, just out of reach. “Remind me who you are?”
“My name is Chuck, and I’m going to get your doctor.” He backed up a step. “Things are...complicated.”
“Well, Chuck, I’ve had people checking me and asking questions, but no one has been answering mine.” Panic rose inside her. “Tell me what’s going on, or give me a phone to speak to my mother. Why are you keeping her from me?”
“Your mother is flying in.” He held up a calming, reassuring hand that somehow only made things worse. “She’s not available to talk yet.”
A pit formed deep in her belly. The walls bore down on her.
Nothing was as it seemed.
This place was starting to feel like a jail, except the private room full of high-tech equipment and flowers was far too posh for incarceration. She needed to get her life in order, call her mom, check in with her boss about her caseload and an upcoming court case she would be testifying in.
“Then I guess that leaves you or the doctor to tell me, because lying here waiting is most definitely stressing me out.” She swung her legs out from under the sheet.
The room spun.
Chuck rushed forward and clasped her arm. His touch was at once both steadying and unsettling.
Her gaze went back to that glinting wedding band. The spark of awareness made her feel ill. Married cheaters were the worst. Her father’s deceit had left a wake of devastation. The room started spinning again but in a different way from having wobbly legs.
Something was wrong here. Very wrong.
“I need to know what’s going on and if you won’t tell me—” she reached for the call button “—then I’m going to find someone who will.”
He released her arm. “Okay, we’ll talk. There’s no agenda here other than looking out for your health. Any question you have, I will answer honestly.”
Alarms went off in her mind. When people said words like honestly and truthfully, that usually meant they had something to lie about. “I want to know why everyone is acting so strange around me.”
“The aneurysm has affected your memory,” he said slowly, carefully.
Her memory? The weight of that word hit her hard. “How so?”
“You’ve forgotten the past five years.”
His words slammed into her, adding a push to that merry-go-round feel in her head. “Five years? Gone. And we know each other?”
Even as her world spiraled, the confusion faded as the logical answer came together—his lack of a medical coat, his familiarity...and the wedding band.
Face somber, Chuck rested his hands on her shoulders, holding her gaze with his. “We more than know each other. I’m your husband.”
* * *
The horrified expression on Shana’s face was damn near insulting. Her gaze shot to his wedding band, then back up to his eyes.
Color drained from her already pale face. She sagged back down into the hospital bed, her blond hair splashing across the pillow. He wanted to protect her, to find some way to wrestle their problems into submission. Not that he’d ever had much luck with that. He needed to put aside his own feelings and focus on her. Focus on keeping her calm—and making the most of this time to heal the rift between them.
Shana thumbed her own bare ring finger. “Married? To each other?”
“For almost four years. Your jewelry was taken off when you were admitted to the hospital.” He tapped her ring finger lightly, the softness of her skin so familiar—and seductive. Even in the middle of the worst crisis of his life.
She had a beauty and fire that rocked even a hospital gown.
“You’re my husband? I... Why... What happened? This is, um, overwhelming.”
“I realize it’s a lot to absorb.” He pulled a chair closer and sat, taking both of her hands in his. “The doctor said the memory loss could be temporary.”
“Or it could be permanent.” She didn’t pull away, but she did look at their clasped hands with confusion. “How long have we known each other?”
Those soft blue eyes turned hawkish, reading him like an X-ray machine. He nodded, clearing his throat. Determined to deliver objective facts. To not make this worse.
“We met nearly five years ago.” He watched her closely to gauge her reaction. He felt like he knew her so well, but also not at all.
How much of the essence of Shana would still exist with the memory loss?
Questions flooded his mind with too many potential futures to absorb at once.
