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Never Christmas Without You: Just for the Holidays / His Holiday Gift
Never Christmas Without You: Just for the Holidays / His Holiday Gift
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Never Christmas Without You: Just for the Holidays / His Holiday Gift

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“Look, it’s fine.” He pushed off from the refrigerator and came over, took her hand and laid his head on her shoulder. When in doubt, use charm. Lots of charm. He’d gotten used to it. And could generally talk his way into or out of any situation. All he had to do was find the precise button to push. Figure out the right person to be. He was brilliant at determining what people needed. And being that person for them.

What does that mean for you? Who do you want to be? Well, the person he wanted to be and who he was were two different types of people. The man that he really was, no one loved back. No one except Grandma Lucy. And right now, he would do anything to make her happy. And keep her healthy. And if that meant begging, then he would gladly get on his knees.

Justin lifted his head. Alex was scant inches away from him.

His first thought was God, I wonder how her lips taste. The next thought was also not helpful. They look soft. And then the next one was far less helpful and was way more naughty. That wasn’t so much of a thought as it was a visual of what they might get up to after their lips connected. He shook his head. Damn it. He’d been doing so well, managing to go whole days without a sexual thought about Alex. Because as much as he loved her, if he ever acted on even one of those notions, that would end everything. “Tell me what you need, Alex. And I’ll make it happen. Right now I’m pleading with you. As my best friend, I need your help.”

* * *

The man was good. Only problem was, Alex couldn’t do what he wanted. She couldn’t just give in. Because then he’d know. For the most part, she’d hid it well. That ridiculous sliver of hope she carried around that one day the sexy Justin Morrison would look at her like he did the string of women he brought around. He never looked at her like that. He viewed her like she was family. Which was nice. And important. But that deep, dark hidden part of her wanted so much more. If she pretended to do this, then she was going to expose herself. He was going to see.

“Look, I think this is a bad idea, and I’ve got the gallery opening on New Year’s Eve. I can’t drop everything just to go to Catalina for a few days.”

“I know. I will do everything possible to help you with this. You tell me what you need and I’ll give you hotel resources. I will make it happen so you can do this. I will clear any schedules, get a helicopter to fly you back to San Diego for meetings, whatever you want.”

Alex shook her head. The man was exasperating. And sexy. And sweet. His dark brown eyes, the color of melted chocolate, implored her. And she wanted to give him anything. She wanted to give him everything. No. We are not giving him everything. This is a way to get your heart broken. Yes, yes, it was. And she was not going to be one of the many who had their heart broken by Justin Morrison. Of all the women in his life, she stuck around, because they hadn’t gone there with each other. They were friends. Just friends. “Okay, look, I know you need the help, whatever. Sheila, she’s your PR person. She’s smart, fun, and she’d totally get it. She is all about the image. Me, I constantly have paint under my fingernails, and generally somewhere else on my body that I don’t even notice, until you tell me.”

“Sheila? Have you forgotten that she is a lesbian?”

Good point. But she might still be willing to help out her boss. Although, that wasn’t ideal. Because then Sheila would really be lying. Plus, the two of them would have no chemistry and it would show.

“Okay, so no Sheila. What about Madison? Madison likes you a lot.”

Justin scoffed. “Madison? Are you insane? It took me months to get her off of calling me three times a day every day. Bunny boilers need not apply.”

Despite herself, Alex laughed. “You are so wrong. Just because she made it known that she was totally into you did not make her a bunny boiler.”

“It makes her clingy. And I don’t need to confuse matters. You’re the perfect choice. No waters to muddy. You know me better than anyone. You could help me navigate the obstacles of the family. I need you. Not Sheila, or Madison, or some other hired hand. I need my best friend.”

She knew it was an honor. She’d give him anything. He didn’t need to know that. Because she was never going to tell him. “Justin, this is a bad idea.”

“It’s only for a week. Just for the holidays. I’ll make sure you get to LA to do everything that you need to do for the gallery opening. And I’ll give you all the support you need. I just need three or four days. Catalina. And technically you’ll be just as far away from LA as you are now, so it’ll be fine. Please, Alex, I need you.”

And because she was a fool, and because she cared too much about him, Alex sighed. “Okay, fine, I’ll do it.”

Chapter 3 (#uf64a4a5b-f8bb-5e1c-bb85-ce720e34cc92)

“You agreed to do what?”

Alex shifted under the scrutiny of her assistant Cassie’s gaze. “I said that I would pretend to be his girlfriend for a couple of days. It’s no big deal.” Alex busied herself getting the gallery ready, fiddling with Bubble Wrap on the corner of a canvas.

Cassie put her hand on her hips. “Look, I know I’m just the assistant here, but I’d like to think we’re friends, too. After all, we survived working for Peter together. He was a miserable old goat, but he put us together. Now I’m about to way overstep my boundary here.”

Alex shifted on her bare feet. If Justin saw her, he’d roll his eyes. But she preferred to work without the restriction of shoes. It was more comfortable, and something about it made her feel free. “Okay, let’s have it.”

“How long have you been in love with him?”

The heat hit Alex first. Then embarrassment that her deep, dark secret that she’d been holding back from everyone, for years, was plain for someone to see. She and Cassie had known each other since she’d moved to San Diego. At the time, Cassie had worked for the artist Alex apprenticed for. When he’d moved to Europe, Cassie had stayed on to work with Alex.

“I—What—I don’t know what you mean.”

Cassie wrapped the next canvas like a pro. The medium-sized painting, featuring streaks of reds, blues, purples and golds and titled simply Closet, was one of her favorites. The closet was the metaphor for her life and the jumbled mess that it was. And now you’re putting it on display to be judged by everybody.

“Okay, look, I’m totally out of my lane here. But I like you. And I know you’re not one for, like, oversharing or getting real close and whatnot, but I’m worried about you. If you think you can go to Catalina and be a stand-in girlfriend, you’re nuts. I see the way you look at him. I’ve looked at one too many guys like that. Like they walk on water.”

Alex winced. “Is it really that obvious?” she whispered.

Cassie shook her head. “No. No, don’t worry about that. It’s just I spend a lot of time with you. And Justin is always here. So I spend a lot of time with the two of you together. I just see these things. What I know is that with proximity, stuff is harder to hide. So what is your plan? Because I’m not letting my boss lady go to Catalina with a piece of toilet paper stuck to her shoe.”

The metaphor gave Alex a great idea for a painting. Focus on what the girl is asking you.

“Look, I get what you’re saying, but what was I supposed to do? He is my best friend. And he is as close to family as I’ve got.”

“So you can just pretend to be his girlfriend and hope he doesn’t notice that, hey, you’re in love with him?”

“I’m not in love with him. I just—”

“Sometimes you hold on just a second too long when he gives you a hug. When you think he’s not watching, you inhale deeply just to get a contact high from his cologne. Every time he holds your hand and pulls you close, you imagine being with him and what it would be like if he finally one day turned to you and said ‘Let’s do this. Give it a go?’ I’ve been that girl. A lot. I don’t want to see you get hurt.”

Her heart thundered against her chest. If Cassie had seen it, she had no hope being locked in on the island with Justin and all his relatives. He’ll find out. And then your friendship will be over.

Alex flushed. “Oh no, this is a disaster. What was I thinking?”

Cassie busied herself. She set another canvas aside, then marked it off her checklist before placing it in its location in the cart. She had a system. When it came to the creative side, that was all Alex, but the organization, the getting pieces to where they needed to be, the customer service, that was all Cassie. She ran everything behind the scenes and Alex would be lost without her.

“I’m not in love with him. We are best friends. And he is like my family. And I wanted to help him out.” Damn, that sounded lame even to her ears. She was so totally screwed. “Oh my God. Would have I done? How do I get out of it?”

“Well, honey, I’m not sure you can get out of it. He said his grandma’s really sick, right? You must’ve had a plan when you said yes.”

“I don’t know. I was sort of gonna do what I’ve always done. You know, pretend it’s not there, bury the feelings deep under years of dirty laundry, where no one should ever go. That was my whole plan. That’s it.”

Cassie shook her head. “I swear, for someone so bright and intuitive, I’m surprised you really don’t want to do anything about your feelings.”

“You don’t understand. I’ve only ever had Justin.” And now Alex could see the problem with that. She’d never really had any close girlfriends. She’d never let anyone get close. Except, Cassie was trying to be a friend right now.

Maybe it was the desperation, maybe it was her spiking blood pressure or the blood roaring to her head that made her think twice. But all she knew was that Cassie was offering some kind of life preserver. And it was nice.

If you get too close, she could hurt you, too. But before Alex could latch onto that thought, Cassie smiled at her. “Look, I’m here if you want to talk about it. I think you and I could be friends. Besides, one of these days, you might need someone more than Justin for advice and stuff.”

Cassie had a point. And for once, Alex liked the idea of having someone else to confide in. Because right about now, she needed all the support she could get.

Chapter 4 (#uf64a4a5b-f8bb-5e1c-bb85-ce720e34cc92)

“I don’t get it. Explain to me why I need to buy new clothes?”

Justin tapped Alex on the nose. She really was adorable. “I think you look awesome. No matter what you wear.” Even now, with her hair up in a messy bun and dressed in a long-sleeved T-shirt and baggy boyfriend jeans, she was cute. Actually stunning, really, bare of any makeup; this was how he liked her. But on closer inspection, there was some paint in her hair. And on her jeans. And also on the hem of the camisole she wore under the long-sleeved T-shirt, which was sticking out. And of course there was paint on her nails. But, well, he was used to that by now.

“Honey, you’ve got paint all over you.”

Her eyes went wide. “I do not. I cleaned up well this time.” He subtly pointed out the jeans and the camisole. And she cursed. “Damn it. I swear I put on clean clothes. I don’t know what happens. Between actually getting dressed in the confines of my bedroom from naked to out the door, something goes very wrong. Every time.”

The moment the word made it past her lips, his brain offered all kinds of visuals and how she would look naked. His favorite was Alex in bed, her dark hair fanning out over the pillow. Paint in all sorts of strategic places that he wanted to kiss. What the hell was that? He shook his head. This was Alex. Why did he want to kiss her? The best part about them was that they were friends. He’d never gone there with her. And he never would. He was not looking to screw that up. Except...that naughty image of Alex wouldn’t go away. And this time the paint was replaced by chocolate. Damn.

“Okay, fine, I guess I need to get some new clothes.”

“Honestly, Alex, you always look great to me. Paint and all. But you don’t know them. Martin, his parents. All except Grandma Lucy. They’re a bunch of vipers.”

She shrugged. “It’s okay, between you and Cassie, I’m getting some truth that I wasn’t ready for over the last couple of days.”

“What did Cassie have to say?”

Alex’s brows furrowed, and she took a moment too long to answer the question. “Just that I’m by myself a lot. And it wouldn’t hurt to have more than just one friend.”

“You have more than one friend. You have lots of them. We were hanging out with a group of them at my house the other night.”

She shook her head. “Your friends. I go along for the ride because I get to kick it with you, so I tolerate other people.”

“You’re crazy, everyone likes you.”

Justin laughed even as he shook his head. She might think she was a loner type but people naturally gravitated toward her. She could be serious, or silly, or just thought provoking. She was so layered. And not just about art. As long as he’d known her, she’d been obsessed with music of all kinds, except country, she liked to say. And books. They were an escape, she’d explained, but painting, painting was life.

She shrugged again. “Yeah, but you know that saying, ‘Just because you’re paranoid doesn’t mean they’re not out to get you.’”

He laughed. “So you’re okay with doing this?”

“I can be easy, just as long as you’re not trying to replace my entire wardrobe. If it’s just a couple of things, then no big deal.”

“That’s the spirit.” He took her hand, the zing of electricity coursed up his arms, and he flexed his hand around hers. Dude, get it together. This is Alex. More and more lately, whenever he was around her, the current was too much to contain. It was also getting hard to ignore. He seriously considered cutting down on their hanging out sessions. Problem was he liked being around her too much. “Let’s go shopping.”

“Fine. Alex Winters reporting for torture.”

After an hour and a half, his feet hurt, and the more dresses that Alex tried on and came out to show him, the more irritable he got. Not because she looked bad in any of them. Quite the contrary. That was the problem. She modeled dresses that showed a little more skin than he was used to seeing from her. Because she was painting all the time, she kept her wardrobe simple, usually leggings, tank top, T-shirt, occasionally she’d toss on a sundress, but nothing like what she’d been trying on at the upscale boutique he’d taken her to. Everything was short and formfitting or cleavage baring and had a slit up to here that nearly showed all the lady parts. Damn, those were his favorite parts. He didn’t want the world to see them. She came out in another red number, the vermillion shade complementing her café-au-lait skin and dark eyes. His mouth watered.

With cutouts at the sides, it showed just the right amount of skin, too. And as for length, cocktail. Her legs were mile high.

He cleared his throat. “That one. That one definitely has to come to Catalina.”

Alex tortured him some more by twirling in the outfit. “Are you sure? Doesn’t exactly say Christmas.”

“It’s red. Red equals Christmas.”

“But you don’t think it’s too...?”

“Sexy?”

She nodded.

His dick agreed.

“It’s perfect. You’re getting the dress. Deal with it.”

Alex wrinkled her nose. “When did you get this bossy? I have my own dresses.”

“Oh please. When we get back to your place, show me one dress that does not have paint on it.”

She opened her mouth to argue, but then quickly snapped it shut again. She narrowed her gaze at him, and her lips were twitching.

After he paid for the red dress, she insisted on paying half for the simple green one. He didn’t want to let her do it, but he knew how important it was to her to pull her weight.

On the pavement, he wrapped his arm around her shoulders. She turned her face up at him, her gaze warm and light and happy, and, oh hell, he really wanted to—What in the world was wrong with him?

“Well, if it isn’t the Siamese twins. I see you didn’t trade up after I left you, Alex.”

Justin held back a groan as he and Alex turned. Her ex stood on the sidewalk glaring at them. “Brian, still a prick, I see.” He had to fight the overwhelming urge to hit the guy. He’d hurt Alex bad and didn’t deserve to walk the earth.

Alex was unusually taciturn. She was generally quick with the comebacks. When it came to this guy, it was like she had nothing. He still had no idea how Alex had ever dated him. He only ever thought about himself, and to make matters worse, he didn’t handle his responsibilities with the bills. And Brian was one of those artists who thought his talent was on the same level as hers. He eventually gave up and became an art dealer. He didn’t deserve her. And you do?

Brian’s smirk morphed into a sneer. “Alex, if you finally dump this loser, you could have a real chance. I might still consider taking you back. You have to get rid of him first, though.”

That did it. “Listen, you little prick—”

She put a hand on Justin’s chest and nuzzled close. “Justin, sweetheart, calling him a prick is an insult to all pricks.”

Justin bit back his chuckle.

Brian, though, didn’t seem amused. “You know, I was the best thing that ever happened to you, Alex. If you’d just paid a little more attention to me and hadn’t been so selfish—”

And that was the fundamental problem with Brian. He believed everything he needed had to come first.

Justin tightened his arm around Alex’s shoulders and pulled her close before kissing her forehead. “Then, Brian, I want to just say, you guys breaking up was the best thing to ever happen to me. Because she realized what a loser you are, and she’s mine now.”

Brian’s brows shot up. Alex snuggled into his side. And when she tipped up her megawatt smile at him, Justin couldn’t help himself. He told himself it was practice for what they would have to do in a few weeks. The truth was, the membrane between them that was a separation between friendship and something more was getting thinner and thinner these days. He dipped his head and slid his lips over hers.

With a surprised gasp, Alex parted her lips, and all doubts terminated on Justin’s end.

All thought. All breath. All basic bodily functions ceased. All that mattered to him, in this moment, was the feel of Alex’s soft lips under his. The slide of her tongue over his. A deep shudder racked his body in the instant his lips touched hers.

Alex wrapped her arms around his waist, and every nerve cell in his body shouted Yes. He knew they had an audience, so he had to make it good, right? Yeah, you keep telling yourself that. He slid his tongue over hers, tangling and retreating, coaxing her tongue into a dance.

She made this sexy whimpering noise at the back of her throat, and it was all he could do to not glide his hands over her perfect ass and press her flush against him, into his erection.

And then the warning bells clanged in his head. This was Alex. But this felt so good. So damn good. Especially when he could feel her nails digging into his back. He pulled away. But still held on to her, for the benefit of Brian.

Apparently, her ex was not pleased about their new relationship.

“You told me. You swore to me there was nothing between you two.”

Alex shrugged, giving Justin that sweet smile again, and he couldn’t help himself—he squeezed her into his side. He needed more of her. He wanted to hold her tighter.