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(#ulink_bb1d4154-b831-5ccf-9994-56829eb3718f) and which can be preserved even in the life of a soldier on active service or of a woman who works behind a counter all day and then goes home to work and mend and wash? And no doubt there is: but it doesn’t always include rest for the legs.
‘His plan for the day’–yes, that is all important. And I keep losing sight of it: in days of leisure and happiness perhaps even more than in what we call ‘bad’ days.
The whole difficulty with me is to keep control of the mind and I wish one’s earliest education had given one more training in that. There seems to be a disproportion between the vastness of the soul in one respect (i.e. as a mass of ideas and emotions) and its smallness in another (i.e. as central, controlling ego). The whole inner weather changes so completely in less than a minute. Do you read George Herbert—
If what soul doth feel sometimes My soul might always feel—
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He’s a good poet and one who helped to bring me back to the Faith.
My brother and all other ham-eating beneficiaries (shd. I call us Hamsters?) join me in good wishes. All blessings.
Yours ever
C. S. Lewis
TO MRS HALMBACHER(L):
[Magdalen College
March 1951]
The question for me (naturally) is not ‘Why should I not be a Roman Catholic?’ but ‘Why should I?’ But I don’t like discussing such matters, because it emphasises differences and endangers charity. By the time I had really explained my objection to certain doctrines which differentiate you from us (and also in my opinion from the Apostolic and even the Medieval Church), you would like me less.
TO SHELDON VANAUKEN (BOD):
17/4/51
Dear Van Auken
My prayers are answered. No: a glimpse is not a vision. But to a man on a mountain road by night, a glimpse of the next three feet of road may matter more than a vision of the horizon. And there must perhaps always be just enough lack of demonstrative certainty to make free choice possible: for what could we do but accept if the faith were like the multiplication table?
There will be a counter attack on you, you know, so don’t be too alarmed when it comes. The enemy will not see you vanish into God’s company without an effort to reclaim you. Be busy learning to pray and (if you have made up yr. mind on the denominational question) get confirmed.
Blessings on you and a hundred thousand welcomes. Make use of me in any way you please: and let us pray for each other always.
Yours
C. S. Lewis
TO R. W. CHAPMAN (BOD):
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Magdalen
17/4/51
Dear Chapman
Did I ever denigrate Horace? If so, I deserve to be struck blind like Stesichorus (was it?) for insulting Helen.
(#ulink_c0a66348-e945-5b12-ba2b-789c5937fef8) But I dare say I did: I wouldn’t now. The truth is I am just returning to him after a period of idolatrous admiration for him in boyhood and a long intervening alienation. The risus ab angulo stanza
(#ulink_382f1019-9139-52bd-93af-29e85f549db0) alone is proof enough.
Yours
C. S. Lewis
TO MARY VAN DEUSEN (W):
Magdalen College
Oxford
18/4/51
Dear Mrs. Van Deusen
Thanks for your letter of the 7th. I have just returned from a holiday and the time since has been spent in writing about 40 letters with my own hand: so much for Ivory Towers.
I also find your question v. difficult in my own life. What is right we usually know, or it is our own fault if we don’t: but what is prudent or sensible we often do not. Is it part of the scheme that we shd. ordinarily be left to make the best we can of our own v. limited and merely probable reasonings? I don’t know. Or wd. guidance even on these points be more largely given if we had early enough acquired the regular habit of seeking it?
How terrible your anxiety about your daughter must have been. She shall have her place in my prayers, such as they are.
Walsh didn’t know much about my private life.
(#ulink_38517824-12cb-5847-bbe6-532a5d3481ca) Strictly between ourselves, I have lived most of it (that is now over) in a house wh. was hardly ever at peace for 24 hours, amidst senseless wranglings, lyings, backbitings, follies, and scares. I never went home without a feeling of terror as to what appalling situation might have developed in my absence. Only now that it is over (tho’ a different trouble has taken its place)
(#ulink_f0357f3f-d4f4-5540-8926-ac2e09d64092) do I begin to realise quite how bad it was.
God bless you all.
Yours sincerely
C. S. Lewis
TO SISTER MADELEVA CSC (W):
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Magdalen College,
Oxford
18/4/51
Dear Sister Madeleva
I don’t know whether I shd. thank you or your publishers for so kindly sending me a copy of your wholly delightful Lost Language.
(#ulink_2c37f710-a579-5a50-89d7-2c231d89542f) At any rate I have to thank you for writing it. There has been nothing v. like it before and it emphasises a side of Chaucer too often neglected. I am glad you say a word on behalf of ‘conventions’ on p. 17. I always tell my pupils that a ‘convention’ appears to be such only when it has ended.
With all good wishes.
Yours sincerely
C. S. Lewis
TO MISS BRECKENRIDGE (I):
Magdalen etc
19 April 1951
I think that if God forgives us we must forgive ourselves. Otherwise it is almost like setting up ourselves as a higher tribunal than Him.
Many religious people, I’m told, have physical symptoms like the ‘prickles’ in the shoulder. But the best mystics set no value on that sort of thing, and do not set much on visions either. What they seek and get is, I believe, a kind of direct experience of God, immediate as a taste or colour. There is no reasoning in it, but many would say that it is an experience of the intellect—the reason resting in its enjoyment of its object…
TO ARTHUR GREEVES (BOD):
[The Kilns]
22/4/51
My dear Arthur
You were quite right to leave me when you did. A farewell meal is a doleful business: it was much better for me to get my luggage dumped and my berth found & for you to be back at home as soon as possible.
Thank Elizabeth for her letter.
(#ulink_531c1b57-f9f7-52a5-b8f7-639428511f07) She will understand, I am sure, why I don’t want to continue the discussion by post: my correspondence involves a great number of theological letters already which can’t be neglected because they are answers to people in great need of help & often in great misery.
I have hardly ever had so much happiness as during our late holiday. God bless you–and the Unbelievable.
(#ulink_db52e3e3-0521-53f1-af1e-2daba86b38b5)Pas de jambon encore.
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Yours
Jack
TO ROGER IANCELYN GREEN (BOD):
Magdalen College
Oxford
22/4/51
My dear Roger—
May 31st & June 1st will do me nicely. May I book you a room for those two nights?
I doubt if you’ll find me both in and without a pupil on April 26th except between lunch & tea, when I suppose June will be in the Sheldonian. Cd. you ring me up if convenient?
Love to all three.
Yours
Jack
TO ARTHUR GREEVES (BOD):
[The Kins]
23/4/51
My dear Arthur
(1.) A Ham has been posted to you today.
(2.) My plans, if they fit with Yours, for the summer are as follows.
(a.) Short visit to C’fordsburn with W. Aug. 10 (arrive llth)-Aug. 14
(b.) Stay with W. in S’thern Ireland Aug. 14-28.
(c.) Longer visit to C’fordsburn alone Aug. 28-Sept. 11th. Can you be in residence at Silver Hill Aug. 28th-Sept. 11th?
Blessings,
Jack
TO DOM BEDE GRIFFITHS OSB (W):
Magdalen etc.
23/4/51
Dear Dom Bede—
A succession of illnesses and a holiday in Ireland have so far kept me from tackling Lubac.
(#ulink_fef1f70d-ce9d-5270-aba4-d0a584ac7a76) The Prelude
