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MR BLUE: Be silent page.
SIR BIG: (points to MR ICTHUS-ORESS) On him. On the thief.
SIR PETER: Who!! Which!! Where!! When!! Why!! What!! How!!
SIR BIG: Take hold good freinds and listin, seeing all the while that he does not run away.
SIR BIG: What no ansewr Dorimie, in the name of the king cach hold!!
(Enter SIR GOOSE.)
DORIMIE: But my lord Big, Mr Icthus-oress was my freind –
SIR GOOSE: (inturupting) Hush o hush, good Sir Big. I can give thee the true history of the king’s ring.
MR ICTHUS-ORESS: And so can I.
SIR BIG: Hold thy tounge theif. Go on Goose, what is the history of the ring.
SIR GOOSE: That Hit tooke it that time when good King Bunny had it off and then Hit made it up to look like a comon ring and soled it to Mr Icthus-oress, but Icthus-oress did not know it was Bunny’s ring so you can not blame him, but why has all this fuss been made King Bunny could have got a new one which would have been as good.
SIR GOOSE: O I see.
MR ICTHUS-ORESS: But we will have to punich Hit for 2 things. I. – stealing Bunny’s ring. 2. – geting me in to trouble.
(Exit all but SIR GOOSE.)
SIR GOOSE: And now I’m all alone. I am not a natif of this country realy. I’m a spy and I have been spying all the time. Thats how I knew about the ring.
(Enter DORIMIE.)
DORIMIE: A man wants to speak to you so please you sir.
SIR GOOSE: But it dos not please me. What is his name?
DORIMIE: Hit.
SIR GOOSE: O let him come.
(Exit DORIMIE.)
SIR GOOSE: Ah now I’ve got him in my power. Him no less ho ho ho ha ha ha he he he hi hi hi. (goes and looks down a walk behind a bank) O now he [is] coming. Thats him is it not? (in a lowe voice) O come on Hit never to go back in freedom. (enter HIT) Hail good Hit.
HIT: Hail.
SIR GOOSE: Ah now you’ll walke off my prisoner. (Exit SIR GOOSE draging HIT. Curtain.)
Scene II: Cannon-Town. The Town Hall.
(Enter KING BUNNY, SIR PETER MOUSE, MR GOLD
FISH, SIR BIG, MR BLUE, SIR GOOSE and DORIMIE.)
KING BUNNY: Ah now I want to know if any one in this town hall can tell me the true history of my ring and whats still more importent give it back to me. But come I have been told that some one named Sir Goose knows it. Is he there?
SIR GOOSE: Yes here my lord.
KING BUNNY: Then tell us.
SIR GOOSE: Twas May 2nd in the year 1327 that (your Magasty came to the crown in the year 1310, 1st of March) Mr Hit stole your ring and in the same day soled it to Mr Icthus-oress but Icthus-oress did not know it was your ring, for Hit (old beast) had made it up to look like a comon ring.
KING BUNNY: I see, O but I don’t see my ring and I’d like to.
SIR GOOSE: All right then. I know who can give it back.
(Enter MR ICTHUS-ORESS and HIT.)
MR ICTHUS-ORESS: (gives ring) Theres the ring.
KING BUNNY: Gold Fish remove Hit.
(Exit GOLD FISH. Curtain.)
Scene III: Cannon-Town. The docks. A wharf at
the frith of the St Bumble. A boat. (On its back
SAILORS round it and a HARBOUR-MASTER.)
1ST SAILOR: A hoy.
2ND SAILOR: Who speaks?
1ST SAILOR: Me, Captain Tom’s first boatswain.
2ND SAILOR: In sooth.
HARBOUR-MASTER: Get to work now. Paint this boat.
(exit)
3RD SAILOR: (aside) O go and paint your nose. (Exit all. Flourish. Enter KING BUNNY, SIR PETER, MR MOUSE, GOLD FISH, SIR GOOSE, DORIMIE, MR ICTHUS-ORESS and 2 SAILORS guarding hit.)
KING BUNNY: Ah now we have got the old bar-man and whats beter still I have got my ring.
CHORUS OF VOICES: Hear hear.
KING BUNNY: O silence. And now I must say good by to Cannon-town, the town [of] my birth. Look hear Peter.
SIR PETER: Yes your Magasty.
KING BUNNY: Tell Sir Goose to tell Sir Big to tell Mr Gold Fish to tell Gollywog to tell Mr Icthus-oress to tell Dorimie to tell the sailors to take Hit away.
SIR PETER: Right sir.
(exit)
KING BUNNY: Now I think we must go back to Mouseland. Look the sun hath clove the earth in 2.
(Curtain.)
THE END
MANX AGAINST MANX
Sir Peter Mouse one night felt a nasty pain in the upper part of his tail, and on waking up began to wonder what it was. ‘At last,’ he said to himself, ‘It was only a bad night-mare.’
However he found his tail mystereousely missing. ‘This is odd,’ said he. ‘I must have had it cut off with-out noticing.’ Next night he (in his sleep) witnessed a soreness at his nose. And in the morning what do you think? His whiskers were gone. ‘Dear me!!’ said Peter, ‘This is bad.’ The next night it snowed.
At 12 o’clock, in his sleep, Peter felt something hurting his ear. When he got up in the morning he found to his surprise that his left ear was cut off. ‘Funny,’ said Peter Mouse, and went out of the room.
Now Peter never spent money if he could help it, and as he was a detective he did not get another to do it for him. He went out into the snow and as he was walking down to his gate he saw paw prints. Mice often see that, but just behind the feet there was a little mark in the snow like this.
‘A funny tail mark that is,’ said Peter to himself. ‘That mouse must have had his tail cut off like me. That is what I call a clue!’ (I think you would too.)
Peter next went to Pip Castle for some clients were generly waiting for him. On his way home Sir Peter saw a large mouse with out a tail!! Peter did not go back to his house but followed the stranger for some distance, and then measured his foot-mark and made a picture of it.
Next night Sir Peter put a dummy of wood in his bed and he him-self sat up all night and watched from the garret window. Before doing so he set a ‘non-killing’ mouse-trap, it was like a small man-trap.
After watching for some time he saw a mouse coming twards the house. As soon as Mr No-Tail came near he got caught in the trap. ‘Come and help me!’ cried No-Tail as soon as he saw Peter at the window. Peter Mouse came out and let him go, then he asked No-Tail to stay the night with him. He took No-Tail in and gave him some beer then Peter led him up-stairs and gave him a bed, and as he slept went down to the polease office. Then he got No-Tail ‘run in’.
THE RELIEF OF MURRY
We had been listening to Peter all the afternoon, but now we went out to enjoy the cool summer air. ‘Peter’ was the famous and illoustrius knighte Sir Peter Mouse and ‘We’ myself and some friends. Peter had been telling us a goode olde taile about a knight and his ladye. She was called Maude.
But we had got tired of the legande, the good knighte was telling, and perchance it was an easy one to get tired of. So we did come into the grounds of Pip Castle to enjoy ye fine summer winds.
Now quoth I to Sir Peter, ‘Wilt go a-hawking on the banks of the Jemima my lord?’
‘Sooth a goodly speech,’ quoth Dorimie.
But Sir Peter said, ‘Nay nay sirs more serios work is there than that. Hast not heard the news from Murry?’
‘Nay tell it me good sir,’ quoth I.
And Sir Peter said, ‘The cats have beseiged Murry and it is like to fall into there hands if we do not send them help very soon.’
‘Well gossip that is surely bad news,’ said Dorimie, ‘and if thy worship will consent we shall send help in the morning.’
‘I my self will head the expedition. Huray!!’
Next morning after an early breakfast we started in the direction of Murry which we sighted in the late evening. It was surrounded completly by the enemyes tents. I realy felt quite thin as we skurried about among these rows of guns and armed men (cats I mean). Once we were chalanged but we pretended to be a cat picket, then we camped in the shadow of a friendly forest.
In the early morning we covered our shining armour with dark cloaks and crept up behind the cat-sentrys back each and killed him. Then we rushed in and set fire to the hostile tents. The confusion was dreadfull. Everywhere the boom and sullen thunder of guns, the groans of the wounded the crackle of the fires and the wild shouts of ‘Sir Peter for ever’ then on ‘In the name of the king!’ When all of a suden the long fierce strain was over. The cats had fled. There camp was smoking ruins. Murry gates were open. The seige was raised!
HISTORY OF MOUSE-LAND
FROM STONE-AGE TO
BUBLISH I (OLD HISTORY)
(55 B.C.) Perhaps no greater country ever was seen in life than Mouse-land and yet one might have thought it might be ignorant oweing to its long ‘stone-age’ which lasted from B.C. 55 to – 1307!! How ever this was not the case. Mouse-land we find is the leading country of the globe!!
(51 B.C.) At first the Mouse-landers were divided into small tribes under chiefs, and continuly fighting with each other.
(49 B.C.) Hacom, chief of the Blue-Bottle tribe marched to Dorimie Castle and murdered the owner, namely Damus, for the sake of the castle and domain. (47 B.C.) He then took the castle, after which it was known as Hacom’s Palace.
Damus in his life had been cheif of the Cosy Tribe, and his death did not disperse his tribe. When they heard of the murder they were very angry and determined to revenge thear king!! So they rose against Hacom and met at Hacom’s Place in 43 B.C. where the castle was laid in ruins and Hacom slain. After which the Cosy became the most powerful tribe in the land.
In those days Mouse-land was called ‘Bublish’ and the mice called Bubills.
Shortly after the ‘Melee of Hacom’s Palace’ (for so it shall be called) some inhabitints of Bombay came over to buy nuts. They taught the mice many things. The most important of which was: the use of money. Before that the Mice (or Bubils as they were called) exchanged things in markets. The Indians landed in 1216.
The Indians as it has been told gave knowledge to the Bublis. But the Bublies asked for some of it. The Bublis asked the Indians how they got on without fighting each others men. The asked ones told the Bublis that they choose a man to rule them all and called him Rajah or king.
The Bubils followed that plan. But no!! ‘Out of the frying-pan into the fire.’ Poor miss led creatures. Now they fought all the more!! Why? Because each mouse wished to be king. One had as much right to the throne as an other. So every place was fighting.
The new chief of the Cosy tribe was named after his country: ‘Bublish’. He being the most powerful man
in the land raised an armie and marched to Dorimie Castle (the old one had been rebilt). When he got there he found that they had chosen another Mouse to be king named Poplar. Bublish pretendit to be quite loyal to him but made him promise that after his death Bublish schould rule.
A BATTLE BETWEEN MICE AND INDIANS
HISTORY OF ANIMAL-LAND
(NEW HISTORY)
BOOK I
It is not my aim in writing this book to compile a full manual of Animal History but merely to set forth in consecutive order some more important facts.
Chapter I
INDIAN SETTLEMENT
The earliest written records of Animal-Land come from the Pongeeins. That nation, under its leader Chin conquered Animal-land when still a land of barbaric tribes. These records, however useful, are often impossible and many of them must be legends. Pongee seems to have held Animal-land until its downfall, when like all empires Pongee subsided. As soon as the Pongeein soldiers were withdrawn from Animal-land the numerous & bloody tribal struggles recomenced. The chief tribes were the Cosois, Draimes, Mansquoos & some others. The first notable event was the landing of some Indian settlers in the North of Animal-land. They landed near the Jemima River, in what was after-wards Mouse-Land. The Cosois, a tribe of Mice, whose chief was Hacom, received them well. The Indians stayed, intermarried with the mice, & helped against their hostile tribes.
About 100 yrs later the Indians advocated peace. The tribes agreed, & Hacom, grandson of the former Hacom, who had Indian ancestors on his mother’s side, was elected King. He was the first proper King of ‘Calico’ as the northern part of Animal-land was then called. Long afterwards the southern states remained uncivilized. After this all the Indians returned to their own country.
