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“Oh, I bet you have.” His deep voice darkened. “You came running to me first thing in need of money, didn’t you?”
“No! That’s not it. I—I don’t want my baby to be illegitimate, that’s all.”
His dark head jerked toward hers, his blue eyes piercing her. “That’s all? Surely you’re not talking about—marriage?”
She bit her lips and swallowed.
“About you and me … being together … in some sort of permanent arrangement. It’s not like this is a hundred years ago and your father’s going to follow me down the aisle with a shotgun between my shoulder blades,” he said. “Hard to do that under house arrest.”
Could she help it if she saw things so simplistically? Every time a teacher at school had asked her to draw a picture of her family, she’d always drawn a mommy and a daddy and herself in the middle.
“You don’t actually see us as a couple, do you?” he said.
She shook her head because he so obviously wanted her to. “Look,” she said, “I guess I just panicked and thought when I felt so sick that I couldn’t do this alone. Maybe I would have been stronger before … but now … I have no money. No allies. No family really … other than Daddy, who’s been indicted.”
“And you’re so used to money, you don’t know how to get by without it.”
“My life hasn’t been what you think. I don’t believe I have any friends left in Louisiana. Everybody here blames me for what they think Daddy did.”
“Because of what he did! And what you helped him do in all probability. Whose fault is that?”
“Right. You think I schemed to steal millions of dollars from Houses for Hurricane Victims and his bank? And that I deliberately set out to destroy your good name?”
“Well, your father damn sure did, that’s for sure.”
“I think my father’s innocent.”
“Then where’s the money he managed? Why can’t we find any records to prove he ever invested a single dollar? Maybe you don’t know how the charity world operates, so I’ll fill you in on a little secret. At the first hint of scandal, all future funding dries up. So now poor families, who were counting on me to build them homes, won’t get them. Because of my close association to the charity, funding for my architectural projects is drying up as well. It would be financial suicide for me to associate myself with you right now. And now you want me to marry you?”
“The government has been investigating him for the past six weeks, and so far they’ve found nothing to link me to any of it. Doesn’t that tell you anything about me? I never volunteered for that organization. I never worked at Daddy’s bank or the shipyard either.”
“Maybe you’re good at covering your tracks.”
“Or maybe I’m innocent. I was an editor and a writer.”
“I wasn’t born yesterday. You got that job because of your father’s connections.”
“Maybe.”
“Maybe you’re a taker like your father. Maybe you came to me yesterday hoping I’d help you financially.”
“Is everything really just money to you?”
He leaned toward her. “How dare you ask me that?”
“Then what about our child? I want our baby to have his or her father’s name … and his love, if that’s possible. Your love. That’s very important to me. Do you want to play a role in his or her life, or not?”
He was silent.
“Because if you don’t, one of my oldest and dearest friends lives in London. Her name’s Carol Lawton, and when she heard about my problems, she offered me a job in a publishing firm over there. It would mean leaving Louisiana …”
“No!”
“You wouldn’t have to stay married to me for very long to give him his name. You could even tell people why you had to marry me.”
“No. I couldn’t do that.” He hesitated, his gaze sweeping her. “So, what kind of theoretical marriage do you imagine we could possibly have? Hell, the only plus we have going for us is that we’re great together in bed.”
“No sex,” she asserted in a low, breathy rush.
“What? You expect me to tie myself to you without even that as a fringe benefit?” He stared through her. “What about you? After the way you kissed me yesterday, are you sure that’s what you want?”
“Who are you kidding? You ran off to the swamp yesterday because you couldn’t take the heat from that kiss. Our marriage should be about the baby—not us. I, for one—definitely—don’t think we should complicate our confusing situation with more sex.”
“Definitely?” The edges of his tense mouth relaxed. “You sound so … er … determined.”
She wished. Who was she kidding? Jake had such a devastating effect on her, she wondered if she’d be able to resist him if he chose to exploit that weakness some night when she was feeling particularly lonely and unloved.
“So, we’re talking about a marriage of convenience. Doubtless, you’ll demand a sizable settlement when we split up?” he said.
“No settlement.”
“Right. A Butler who isn’t after my money. What a refreshing development.”
“I’ll sign a prenup if you want me to. If you help me find a job somewhere … or help me get started in London, that would be wonderful. We … we wouldn’t even have to live together while we’re married either. I just want the baby to feel his father wanted him.”
“So, no sex and no settlement, huh?”
“I told you, this isn’t about sex or money. It’s about what’s best for the baby. I grew up with all the money in the world, but …”
“But with a real bastard for a father, who never gave a damn about you. Poor little rich girl.”
“Please … don’t run him down.” She stopped, feeling bleak at the dark feelings his words too easily stirred within her. Her childhood with her father may have been loveless, but that didn’t mean she could bear other people sitting in judgment of him. Especially not now when he was under house arrest and she herself was uncertain as to his guilt of innocence.
Turning away so he wouldn’t read the longing that welled up inside her, she watched a happy young couple leave the medical building. They were laughing and holding hands. When they reached their battered, compact car, the man pulled the woman into his arms and kissed her fervently. Maybe they, too, had learned they were going to have a baby—only they were both thrilled.
Color me green, she thought.
Watching them, too, Jake stiffened. “Sorry … for what I just said about your dad,” he said in a gentler tone.
“It’s okay,” she whispered. “Our marriage would hardly be a fairy tale with the promise of happily-ever-after like we both dreamed we might know with someone we would have freely chosen some day. And believe me, my father won’t be happy about any of this when he finds out.”
“If you’re determined to get married, we live together,” Jake growled.
“Why—when you didn’t even want to spend the night with me last night?”
“Who the hell knows? Maybe because I don’t trust you as far as I can throw you. As long as you’re my wife, I’ll keep you close so I can keep an eye on you. Besides, who’ll look after you if I’m not around?”
Against her better judgment, at this softer sentiment her heart warmed to him a little.
“My house is big,” he said. “You can use the bedroom downstairs that you slept in last night. I’ll live on the second floor just like always. But while we’re married, you’re to have nothing to do with your father.”
“But Jake ….”
“That’s nonnegotiable. I don’t trust him or you—and I especially don’t trust the two of you together.”
“But, he’s been arrested. He’s alone and in trouble. I know how that feels. I can’t just turn my back on him.”
“No involvement. So long as you’re my wife, you’re not to associate with him. Not even a phone call. You’re to stay away from his trial, too. Do you understand me?”
She turned and stared mutely out the window at the cars speeding by beyond the parking lot. What if her father was innocent and she deserted him?
“Do you want to marry me or not?” Jake demanded, hard finality in his voice.
Uncertain, she froze. Finally she nodded. “But only for the baby’s sake.”
He frowned. “Then you’ll agree to stay away from him while we’re married?”
“Yes,” she whispered in a tone that was so faint it was nearly inaudible.
“There can be no other men in your life while we’re married.”
“What?” she murmured, feeling crushed that he thought her so low. But then, all he knew was that she’d made love to him the first night she’d met him. How could he possibly realize how special he’d been, how profoundly connected she’d felt to him?
“Since our marriage will upset a lot of people, including my clients and employees, I want it to appear respectable. I don’t want to give the press or your numerous enemies anything extra to chew on. So you’ll have to agree not to be seen out with other men.”
“Of course,” she said quietly even as anger began to bubble inside her. “What about you, Mr. High And Mighty? Will the same rule apply to you?”
“I will abide by the same rule—for the same reason.”
“Not out of any loyalty to me. But then, why should you feel the slightest loyalty? You don’t want to marry me any more than I want to marry you.”
“Maybe we’re finally beginning to understand each other. Will you be faithful?”
“I said yes already!” she snapped. “Did you really spend the night alone last night?”
He smiled. “So you care a little, too?”
She shook her head much too vigorously, because his quick white smile, the beautiful smile that had seduced her, broadened, causing her blood to heat.
“Were you really alone?” she persisted, furious at him for being so attractive to her just because of a smile and at herself for being so susceptible to his virile brand of sexiness.
“I was. So, when you’re my wife, a wife who, for the record, refuses to sleep with me, will you expect me to answer questions like that if I choose not to come home some night?”
“Look … I shouldn’t have asked about last night. Forget I did it! I don’t care what you do ….”
“Okay.” Grinning, he held up his hands in a gesture of mock innocence. “But just in case you do care … a tiny bit … I spent the night alone like I said. I was in a houseboat in the swamp behind Belle Rose that I told you about. The only time I left it was when I built a fire on a muddy bank and cooked out.”
“What did you cook?”
“A squirrel. There’s not much to a squirrel. So it was a long, hungry night spent alone.”
She frowned. “You killed a little squirrel?”
“I threw my knife. He died in a flash.”
“I can’t believe you’d be so cruel!”
“What? Do you think I like killing animals? I like to eat. Do you think you’re morally superior because your meat comes in plastic-covered packages in the grocery store?”
Unable to refute his logic but not liking the thought of him eating a helpless, little squirrel any better than she originally had, she began to twirl a strand of her hair and fume as she stared into the distance.
“Look, I had to get away,” he said. “Firing everybody … you showing up saying you might be pregnant … was too much for one day. I didn’t want to be with you … or any other woman. I know it sounds unusual, going off alone into the wilderness on the spur of the moment, but it’s something I do fairly frequently when I need to chill. I’ll probably do it again during our marriage—if we’re married any time. Happy now?”
“I wish.”
“Okay. Back to the plan. We marry. At some point after our child is born, we go our separate ways. No settlement. Just custody arrangements.”
“Fine,” she agreed, feeling dismal at that prospect.
“That’s all you really want?”
“I don’t want any of this!”
“You wanted me that night,” he reminded her.
The memory of it, plus the knowledge that she still wanted him, was not her favorite fun fact.
“You knew how desperate I felt that night … because my father had just told me he was caught in a credit crunch and was on the verge of losing everything, including the bank, if the merger between his shipyard and Claiborne Energy didn’t work out.”
He nodded.
Knowing that she’d had a date with Logan that night to his grandfather’s eightieth birthday, her father had ordered her to do everything in her power to charm Logan and lull his suspicions that anything might be amiss with the Butler empire. But Logan had been interested only in Cici.
“I felt shy that night at Belle Rose when Logan abandoned me to dance with Cici. I didn’t know anyone. Then you started smiling at me from across the room. I smiled back and you came up to me and were so nice, I began to enjoy myself and open up. When you said you were involved with my father in that charity, I told you how worried I was about him. I had no idea you were planning to gang up with Hayes Daniels and accuse him of all those crimes or that maybe the only reason you took an interest in me was to get more information out of me.”
“I wasn’t planning anything. I had no idea your father was guilty of anything that night. Cici simply wanted to spend time with Logan, and she asked me to take care of you. Hayes didn’t clue me in about Mitchell until the next morning. But after the credit problems you’d hinted your father was having, I thought you must have known everything your father was doing and that you were involved. So I was furious at you for deceiving me … and seducing me. I thought maybe you did all that in an effort to buy my silence where your father was concerned. I called you because I wanted to give you a chance to defend yourself. When you wouldn’t take my calls, I took that to mean you were guilty.”
She hadn’t answered the phone because she’d thought him the most treacherous human being alive for seducing her to gain information about her father.
“I was very lonely that night, too,” he said. “Being with my family always makes me feel like I don’t know my place in the world. Then Logan abandoned you. And you were very, very beautiful.”
She blushed, feeling shyly pleased.
“You weren’t what I was expecting,” he said. “I thought you’d be more like your father but you were nothing like him. You swept me off my feet, as you probably know.”
Had he felt the same incredible rush of thrilling excitement in her presence she’d found in his? She wanted to believe that so much.
“Later I wondered if you’d been setting me up,” Jake said, killing the softness she’d been feeling toward him. “What about this pregnancy? Did you get pregnant on purpose? Maybe to buy me off?”
