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“Okay,” she said softly.
They held each other’s eyes for a moment.
“Would you mind making some toast while I put in some phone calls?”
She shook her head quickly, grateful for the chance to feel she was reciprocating his care of her. “I can burn toast with the best of them.”
“Great. I like charred bread. I’ll be in my office.”
He went into a room off the den, and Tessa looked at the back of him as he exited. Strong, capable. Both the Greer men had a lot of admirable qualities.
Hunt hadn’t loved her, though.
Intuition had told her a long time ago that Cord felt more toward her than brotherly. It was in his standoffish posture, in his discomfort when he was in the same room alone with her if Hunt went to do something while all three of them were in the house. It was the way she caught him watching her every once in a while, his eyes on her as if he was gazing at a fascinating, desirable treasure. His gaze would slip away guiltily if hers ever met it. She pretended not to notice. It was easier for everyone that way.
But it made the situation all the worse now. She wanted Hunt to be alive for the sake of their child. Deep inside, she knew Cord would consider it his obligation to raise Hunt’s child in the place of its missing father.
Tessa didn’t want that to be the case. She didn’t want to be an obligation. She didn’t want the people of Crookseye to laugh at her and her child because there was no father, and she didn’t want to succumb to the caring in Cord’s eyes. The truth was, letting him into her life would be taking advantage of him.
No matter how desperate her circumstances became, she would not allow herself to cross that line. There were all kinds of different honor codes: Hunt’s was for his country; Cord’s was for his family and homestead.
Tessa’s was for her child. This baby wasn’t going to be raised in the shame that had been her constant childhood companion. She would be proud of her child. She would be a loving mother. She would give this child the emotional security she had never known. She might have to raise her baby alone, but she would give it every last soul-nurturing ounce of what she had wanted all her life.
Love.
THUMP! NAN ASHLEY HIT Cord’s office window with a flying newspaper, dead on, the way she did every morning at this time to announce herself, but still he nearly shot out of his boots. His ears, straining for the slightest suspicious sound, screamed danger! with the heavy thud of noise against the pane. He cursed under his breath. Not at Nan, who tried so hard to unobtrusively care for him, but at the situation that had him so edgy.
He got up to open the half glass-paned, half wood door, letting in a burst of frigid air. “Howdy, neighbor.”
She stamped her snow boots on the raffia doormat outside his office. “Scared ya, didn’t I?” Her round, wrinkled face was rosy with delighted mischief.
“Yes, ma’am. This time. One day, I’m going to scare you. You’ll be surprised when a newspaper gets fired right back at you.”
“Ha.” She shrugged off his facetious retort and handed him the plastic-wrapped newspaper she always brought him although he rarely had time to read it. It was her excuse, her way of checking up on him. She glanced at him from head to toe. “Didn’t see your truck leave this a.m.”
“I…” He glanced guiltily at the doorway. “I overslept.”
“Hmm. Not like you. You ailing?”
“No, ma’am. Not in the least.”
“You ought to be eating a good breakfast every morning, Cord. At least a milk shake.” She sniffed the air warily. “What’s that smell?”
“Ah…”
Tessa walked in, not noticing Nan standing behind him, and extended the plate. “Cord, here’s your burned toast.”
Nan peered around his shoulder at Tessa—and then her offering. “Damn right,” she said laconically. “Didn’t your mother ever teach you to toast bread, child?”
“Hello, Mrs. Ashley.” Startled, Tessa glanced at Cord, who shrugged. “I don’t suppose I’ve got much talent in the kitchen.”
“I’d say. On the other hand, it takes a special kind of woman to burn bread.” Nan’s gaze went from the plate to Tessa, to Cord and back to Tessa.
“Special?” Tessa repeated.
“Yep. Your attention was specially focused on something else.” She eyed Cord shrewdly. “Heard from Hunt?”
He didn’t dare glance at Tessa. “Hoping to soon.”
“Well.” Her alert gaze moved over each uncomfortable captive again. “Let me know if you do. I’m going to be working half days at the beauty salon starting today, so I can whip up a meal or two should you be needing it.” Her tone held nothing but kindness, no intended slight to Tessa.
“I’m sure we’d enjoy that. Why are you slowing down your work schedule?” He wanted her to focus on anything except Tessa, and right now, Nan’s gaze wasn’t missing a thing.
“My knees are bothering me, Cord. And I’ve got more money than I know what to do with anyway. I keep the shop just so the gals’ll have a place to work and the customers’ll have a place to gab.”
“I could pick up your extra half day,” Tessa said eagerly, shocking the hell out of Cord.
“No!” he automatically vetoed, his tone stern.
Both women stared at him as if he’d taken leave of his senses.
“I mean,” he began again, intensely aware that he was between two women and had sounded way too male, “I mean…perhaps that isn’t the best idea, Tessa.”
She blushed, clearly misunderstanding his concern to be about the baby. “Cord, it’ll be fine.”
Nan’s brows rose over cherry-dark eyes not quite hidden enough beneath wrinkled eyelids as she awaited his response with great interest.
He cleared his throat. “I’d rather you didn’t work right now, Tessa.”
The elderly woman’s eyes fairly bugged with mischievous glee. She slapped Cord on the shoulder with a hefty whack that made his arm burn almost as hot as the skin on the back of his neck. “Why, you old son of a gun! Aren’t you taking your brotherly duties a bit too seriously, Cord? Tessa’s her own woman, aren’t you, honey? And I’d love to have ya, but I need me a chauffeur more than anything. It would save my knees tremendously ’cause driving’s what’s really killing me. You can drive me to the salon and then back after we put in the morning hours. What do you say?”
“Yes,” she answered.
“No!” Cord insisted. “Tessa—”
Nan elbowed him and flashed a genuine, teasing smile. “It’s okay, big brother. I won’t let her do anything that might harm the baby. You can rest easy on that account. There’s no heavy lifting at a beauty parlor, Cord. Just a lot of gals having some fun and talking too much over curlers and coffee.”
Thunderstruck, Cord and Tessa stared at the gnome of a woman.
“How did you know?” Tessa’s hand instantly went to her stomach.
Nan peered at the mound not quite disguised by the faded jeans and baggy sweater. “You’re not exactly incognito, though I can tell you’ve tried hard to be. And Cord’s macho routine is a dead giveaway.”
“I’m not being macho!” He merely wanted to make certain there were no bad guys waiting to chase Tessa down. She seemed to have forgotten all about his nighttime visitors.
“Your mama know you’re staying here, honey?” Nan stared pointedly at both of them.
“Actually, I’m not really staying here—”
“Yes, you are,” Cord said firmly. “Until the situation is resolved.”
“It’ll take a couple of months just to resolve the situation, I reckon,” Nan put in. “Hester’s gonna have a fit if she finds out you’re here.”
At the mention of her mother’s name, he saw Tessa’s face take on unhappiness like a sinking ship takes on water. “Hester doesn’t have to know.”
“Nope. She won’t know from me.” She patted Cord’s shoulder conspiratorially. “You’ll make a fine uncle, Cord. You’ve always had that family instinct. It’s the Irish in you, I suppose. Herding the flock together. Keeping the clan secure.” She shuffled out the door, pulling a plastic rain bonnet from her coat pocket. “It’s misting, and that might make the roads a little slick if it gets any colder. It’ll sure as shooting make the ladies’ hair fall, so I’ll probably get a ton of cancellations this a.m. Come over in fifteen, Tessa. Cord, we’ll probably just start easy today with two hours, and if the roads get bad, I’ll get the little pre-bundle of joy right back here.”
She never even looked back for his confirmation. Together, Tessa and Cord watched the elderly woman make her way across the gravel driveway to the open field that lay between the two houses. Once she gained her own yard, Cord swung the door shut.
“Tessa—”
“Don’t ever tell me what to do.” Her large eyes were full of blue fire, her skin flushed along the cheekbones with anger. “Please, Cord. Mrs. Ashley is offering me an opportunity I don’t intend to pass up. I need a job. I know I said I’d stick close to the house, today at least, but I won’t be alone, and it’s just a short drive into town.”
He stared at her, suddenly starting to understand the hasty jump at employment. “Tessa, I’m just worried—”
“I know you are. And I appreciate that. But please try to understand that both of us are worrying right now.” She put her hands on her hips. “I don’t think you understand that I’m going to be raising a child alone. Even if Hunt isn’t d-dead—” she hesitated after forcing the word out “—he might not be able to help me with the baby. She’s offering me a chance I just can’t afford to pass up.”
“Tessa!” Cord couldn’t believe what he was hearing. “Surely you don’t think I wouldn’t provide for my own blood.”
“I know you would.” Her voice was full of quiet determination. “You want to provide for me right now and I’m no blood relation of yours. But, Cord, I can’t go from one brother to the other just because there’s a child involved. I have to stand on my own two feet.”
He recoiled from the meaning in her words. “God, Tessa, I…”
They looked into each other’s eyes for a long moment. He nodded once, his heart tearing. Somewhere in his subconscious, maybe, just maybe, he had been relishing his role of stand-in man in Tessa’s life. Sure, he owed it to Hunt to take care of his girlfriend, but she was Hunt’s girlfriend. Not his. And she never would be. The tearing went further than his heart and deep into his soul.
“You’re right,” he said quietly. “I may be trying to hold you too tightly because of Hunt. I may be overly suspicious because I got spooked last night. But I won’t interfere in your personal life again, Tessa.” He swallowed, avoiding her gaze. “You are your own woman in my eyes.”
Before she could reply, he strode out the door, heading for the barn.
So she couldn’t see that there was more than brotherly concern in his eyes.
Chapter Three
Cord waited until he saw Tessa walk across the field to Nan Ashley’s house before emerging from the barn. He went into his study through the back door, watching out the window until Nan’s car pulled out of her driveway and pointed toward town.
Sighing, he picked up the phone and dialed some numbers. Tessa had unfortunately been right. He had been overbearing in his role as protector. He had basically forced her to come to his ranch for his own feelings of security. He had asked her to stay close to the ranch today to ease his own fears.
He bowed his head as the phone rang at the other end. Tessa had made it as clear as the glassy icicles hanging from the eaves that she wanted to fly solo, regardless of whether Hunt ever returned to her. She wanted to find her own way in the world.
He understood that desire. He simply wished her way in the world led to him.
No one answered at the military base. Frowning, he considered his two options: Call again later, or go looking for answers.
Putting on his Stetson and grabbing up his keys, Cord locked the door behind him. Tessa would be with Nan at the beauty parlor for a few hours; knowing she was safe gave him unworried license to leave the ranch.
“THIS IS GOING TO WORK OUT very well for both of us.”
Tessa smiled at the pleased note in Nan’s voice as she steered the vintage sedan into town. “I’m so glad you needed help.”
“I’d say you’re the one who needs help,” Nan pointed out wryly. “Cord looked like he swallowed a rock when you asked me for a job.”
He had looked dismayed. Tessa guiltily shoved the memory aside. “Cord’s got enough to do without watching out for me.”
“Could be he wants to.”
Tessa shook her head at the pert reply. “Cord considers it an obligation on his brother’s behalf.”
“Because of the baby?”
Tessa started to shake her head again but realized the baby likely had a lot to do with his vigilant watch over her last night. “Partly,” she admitted reluctantly, not willing to divulge that Cord had received unwelcome news last night from men he didn’t trust. That was a confidence she wouldn’t share with anyone until Cord could determine whether he had reason to mourn his brother or not.
“You know, Tessa, from where I’m sitting, it seems you’re in a bit of a pickle.”
Tessa sighed.
“When do you plan to tell your mother?”
“I’m not. Not right now.” Her answer was sharp.
“I suppose it’s too much to hope that a grandbaby in the picture might soften Hester up.”
Tessa pressed her lips tightly together and shrugged at the pain-inflicting words. Nan didn’t mean to pry at old, never-healed wounds. “Where I’m concerned, my mother is never going to believe there is any good in me. A grandchild out of wedlock will certainly clad her opinion in iron.”
“Oh, gal.” Nan settled her rain bonnet more firmly onto her hair. “How long are you staying at Cord’s?”
“I don’t know.” The question was startling. “I didn’t mean to stay there last night, but he insisted. He felt it was in my best interest.”
“Oh?” Nan jumped on that information.
Tessa struggled to think of a way out of her accidental admission. “I think he was worried about the ice storm the weathermen were predicting for today.”
“Pooh. TV weathermen are just props. Gives the viewers a break to see someone with a smile on his face. Not that those guys know beans about what they’re forecasting.” Nan waved that away. “Ice storm’s coming tonight. I’ve been keeping an eye on the Farmer’s Almanac, and there are several clues in the woods around my house and Cord’s that make me think it’s tonight, tomorrow night at the latest. And when it comes, it’s going to be a doozy!” She sneaked a glance at Tessa. “You’d best stay at the ranch a few more days.”
Tessa parked in front of Nan’s Beautiful Woman salon. Turning off the ignition, she faced her new employer. “There is nothing going on between Cord and me.”
“Oh, I believe you.” Nan nodded sagely in perfect understanding. “But would it hurt if you gave it a chance, honey?”
Tessa stared at Nan. “What do you mean?”
“Simply that love can grow in the rockiest soil if all the other conditions are right. Cord would make a fine husband and father. You’ll be a fine mother and could be a wife he’d be proud of. After all the years of searching, you could finally have a real family.” The elderly woman put a hand over Tessa’s briefly. Nan’s skin was warm, wrinkled and imparted caring, which felt like heaven to Tessa’s starved heart. “But you’ve got to allow yourself to be open to being loved, Tessa. If you push it away all your life by looking in the wrong places, you never will find it. You deserve to be loved, Tessa.”
She couldn’t look at Nan any longer. It was a benediction to hear that someone believed in her—and yet Tessa wondered if Nan’s faith was misplaced. “We’ll be late,” she said miserably, hoping to get the good-hearted woman off the subject of handsome Cord. She just couldn’t think of him too much. It would be wrong, wrong to fall into his arms when she was pregnant with his brother’s child.
“One of the perks of being companion to the boss lady is that you’re on my time,” Nan said cheerfully. “I get to work when I feel like it.” She opened the door, carefully setting her snow-booted feet onto the paved road. “I won’t bring it up again, Tessa,” she suddenly said with a backward glance. “I certainly don’t mean to make you uncomfortable. And I sure am going to like having a driver.” She gave Tessa an irrepressible grin.
Tessa doubted that Nan would be able to stay off the subject of Cord, but she knew the woman meant her no harm. Like the horse that was led to water but did not drink, Tessa did not have to fall in love with Cord.
It was as simple as that.
