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She wanted to tell him that she had done nothing to deserve his hatred. She wanted to beg him to forgive her for being in the wrong place at the wrong time, but more than that, she wanted to slap the smug expression from his face. He was so self-righteous in his capacity as the bereaved widower, the grievously wronged party who suffered in silence. But Meagan had also been wronged.
She turned and her eyes caught his and held them with a question that seemed also to be a challenge.
Without dropping his gaze, Josh came toward them and stopped when Will Carmichael’s hand dropped on his shoulder.
“She is young and strong, and should be a good worker,” Will reminded Josh. “She can cook and sew and bake…” The unspoken premise that Meagan could do all the things Lily had not been willing to master hung in the air.
“I still don’t want her in my house,” Josh ground out the words.
“Let her sleep in the barn.” Will laughed. “The judge didn’t say she was to be treated as an honored guest. But Josh—” he sobered as he spoke “—don’t be too hard on the girl. There is a question in my mind as to whether or not she is guilty. Something smacks of deception, but I was unable to ferret it out in the few days I had to build my case.”
“You heard Ruth Somers,” Josh fired back. “She knows what she saw. And she saw this woman kill my wife.”
“Ruth saw what she wanted to see,” Will grumbled, “just like she always does. It’s just too bad Meagan hired on to help with Ruth’s children. If she hadn’t been there Ruth wouldn’t have had such an easy scapegoat.”
Meagan gave Will a look of gratitude. But before she could speak, Josh grabbed her elbow and steered her toward the street, neither asking nor wanting to hear what Will Carmichael had meant by his words. A burst of laughter from down the street told him it was already too late to approach the judge.
“Get in the wagon,” Josh ordered. “And you can stop making sheep’s eyes at Will Carmichael. He can’t help you anymore.”
And neither can I, he added silently.
When it came right down to it, Josh Daniels suddenly realized he was unable to help himself, for when he touched Meagan Reilly a bolt of unwanted attraction shot through him that boded no good for either of them.
He drew a deep breath and climbed onto the seat of the wagon. God knew he wouldn’t have such untimely, and unwelcome, surges had Lily been able to fulfill her duties as his wife. But ever since Abbie’s dangerous birth she had been unable to receive him as her husband. And now Lily was dead, and the law of the land had given to Josh a young woman bursting with life and health and, God help him, an earthy sexuality to which a man would have to be dead not to respond.
If he were smart he would follow the judge and demand that, drunk or sober, the man rescind his order and give the girl over to Will Carmichael and his wife, with whom she had stayed while waiting for the judge to arrive to preside over her trial.
But where women were concerned, Josh Daniels was not a smart man. There was no question about the fact that he needed the help. Nor was there a question that he would have accepted assistance from any soul on the face of the earth rather than Meagan Reilly.
He wondered how long she would stay with him before bolting into the wilderness. Personally, he knew he would take his chances with the Indians before he’d work as another man’s slave. He glanced down in time to see Meagan toss her bundle into the back of the wagon. She was about to follow when his voice stopped her.
“Get up here on the seat beside me,” he ordered brusquely. “I don’t want to get home and find you gone.”
He clucked to the horses as she scrambled into the seat. The wagon hit every rut as they followed the road out of town.
Meagan was perched on the very edge of the seat, putting every available inch of room between herself and Josh Daniels. With each jolt of the wagon he expected to see her disappear over the side and fall beneath the wheels, or run for open country. He pulled the wagon to a halt.
“Look, Miss Reilly, I don’t want to be responsible for your death either through an accident if you fall off the seat and under the wagon wheels, or through your foolishness should you decide to try to run away. Now get enough of your body on the seat so that I can be sure you’re not going to kill yourself on this bumpy road, or I’ll be forced to tie you in the back of the wagon.”
Meagan shot him a venomous look but she did allow herself a bit more of the seat. They rode through the afternoon, stopping only to rest the horses and allow them to drink at the plentiful streams.
Meagan’s eyes scanned the horizon. How she longed for the sight of her brother. But Reilly had gone to join his mother’s people and it was doubtful that he would have heard of her plight. Still shocked and confused by the situation that had ended in her conviction, Meagan tried to focus on anything other than the unbelievable circumstances in which she found herself.
Josh reached into his haversack and brought out some bread and cheese, which he thrust toward her. “Chew it slowly,” he cautioned, “and make it last. There will be little else until after we get home.”
“Home,” Meagan repeated as though the word were new.
“What did you say?” Josh asked.
“I said home. I don’t remember ever going home before.”
Josh raised his eyebrows. “Surely you must have had a home somewhere.”
“Father was a schoolteacher. When I was small we often lived on the school grounds, or in the school itself. Perhaps if my mother had lived we would have had a real home, but after her death Father decided he had a calling to educate the Indians. We lived in a tepee with an Indian woman for a while. She was the mother of my half brother.”
“Is that why you killed Lily?” he asked without taking his eyes from the road. “Because you were jealous of her home?”
His words hit her like a face full of cold water. “I didn’t kill your wife, Mr. Daniels, and I’ve never seen your home. You will remember that it was at the house of your neighbor, Ruth Somers, that your wife went to her reward.”
Josh jerked the reins so abruptly that the team shied in confusion. “Death was never meant to be a reward to my wife. She was filled with life and vivacity.”
“Apparently everyone didn’t see her in quite the same light,” Meagan commented, positive that her words would be lost in Josh’s efforts to control the panicked horses.
Josh managed to quiet the animals. Then he turned to Meagan. “If we are to keep from leaping at each other’s throats, Miss Reilly, I suggest we keep our opinions regarding my wife’s death to ourselves. I believe you are responsible for her death, either deliberately or by accident.”
“And I believe you are a bigger fool than you look to be,” Meagan fired back.
“If I turn you back to the judge you will hang,” he threatened, though he knew the words to be beneath him.
“You need someone to work your land and tend your house and care for your daughter,” Meagan reminded him. “There are no single women within a hundred miles of here, and a man would want a full share for the work you’ll get from me for nothing. I don’t think you can afford to send me away.”
Josh’s jaw hardened, along with his heart. The girl was too damned smart for her own good. He did need help, and the presence of a woman who could cook and clean, as well as tend the livestock, would be a tremendous asset. “Very well, then,” he grumbled. “You will stay as long as you put in a fair day’s work. I don’t expect you to do any more than I do.”
“That sounds just,” she agreed.
“I am up an hour before dawn. You will be ready to help with the morning chores.”
Josh Daniels continued talking, but Meagan didn’t respond to his words. Her mind had traveled back in time to the days of her childhood. Life in the Indian village had been relaxed and carefree. As the only white child, she was looked upon as somewhat of a curiosity. The Indian children enjoyed teaching her their games and skills. Her father, a teacher, was a respected man in the tribe and his choice of taking one of their women as his wife was accepted with favour.
Then smallpox had all but wiped the tribe from the face of the earth. Even Meagan’s stepmother had died, but Meagan, her father and half brother were not touched by the sickness. The Indians—what few there were left—began to look upon them askance. Why had the white man and his children been spared?
The day the old chief died, James Reilly took his children and left the village. His wife and his credibility had gone before him, and it was prudent to move on. But while the Indians had been willing to accept and share their lives with the little white child, the white people were not willing to share their lives, or, for that matter, their towns, with a half-breed Indian boy and his family. And they certainly did not want the boy’s father teaching their children.
When Meagan was old enough she hired out, taking care of children and helping the women with their spring and fall housecleaning. After her father’s death Meagan’s brother decided to leave the world of the white man and return to his mother’s tribe. Having been educated by her father, Meagan was qualified to supply an education to the children of a household as well as carry her share of the work.
She had come to Banebridge hoping to obtain a permanent position teaching children. Her search had taken her into the wilderness where Ruth Somers had offered employment. During Meagan’s first week, Lily Daniels had pitched down the Somerses’ stairs. Meagan had run from the kitchen to help and was bending over the unfortunate woman when Ruth began screaming for her husband and accused Meagan of murder.
And now Meagan was going to a place that would be her home and her prison.
Meagan had always thought that someday she would have a man and a home of her own. Now that dream would never come to pass. Slaves didn’t have homes. Indentured servants weren’t allowed the freedom of choosing a husband. Her life was over before it had a chance to begin.
She closed her eyes and tried to squeeze out one more prayer for salvation, aware that the prayers with which she had barraged heaven over the past weeks had apparently fallen on deaf ears. Surely the Lord hadn’t received her messages, for he hadn’t taken the time to answer.
The horses, tired at the end of the day, slowed to little more than a walk as they pulled the heavily laden wagon up a steep hill.
Meagan wouldn’t have tried to jump from the wagon as they clipped along the road coming out of town, but now she might—if she could jump clear and somehow make her way through the woods to the Indian village where Reilly, her half brother, had gone.
As the horses crested the hill, Meagan threw herself from the wagon and ran for the woods. The air burned like fire in her lungs as she raced through the trees and across the streams.
Josh crashed through the brush behind her. Closer, ever closer, as Meagan’s breathing became increasingly shallow and the pain in her side caused her to favor her right leg.
Meagan was younger than her pursuer. There was no reason why she shouldn’t be able to outrun him. But his persistence defeated her, and in the end she looked back to see him less than ten feet behind. Then, she missed her footing and plunged down an embankment into the icy water below.
She could hear his ragged breathing even before he pulled her from the stream.
“What in the hell possessed you to do such a damn fool thing?” he asked as he set her on her feet.
She brushed a muddy hand across her face and tried to fight back the tears.
“If you were going to run away, why didn’t you run when you were closer to a settlement? There’s nothing out here. There’s no place to run. You wouldn’t last the week. If the Indians didn’t get you, the animals would.” He gave her a little push and marched stoically along beside her, his hand grasping the thick rope of hair that had fallen down her back. “I thought I was doin’ you a favor by keeping you from hanging. Are you crazy or something?”
He grumbled with each step he took and became more verbose as his breath returned right along with his anger.
But his fury was no match for hers. She was angry with him, angry with herself and angry at the world in general.
“No, Mr. Daniels, I’m not crazy. No more than you. I just don’t want to spend the rest of my life working as your slave.”
Josh stopped and turned the girl toward him. She was a sorry-looking sight, with her dripping clothes, muddy face and red-rimmed eyes.
“If you’ll remember, Miss Reilly, I didn’t ask for your indenture. And, I guess if it were me, I would have done the same thing. But I’m a man, and at least I would have had a chance of survival in the wilderness. You don’t! If I thought you did, I just might let you go and save us both a lot of grief.” He sighed as he realized she was shivering noticeably. “As it is, if I don’t get you warmed up, and quick, neither of us will have to worry about you ever being an indentured servant because you won’t live long enough for me to get you home.”
Again he nudged her forward. “Now get a move on. We’ll camp in the clearing near the wagon.”
Meagan did as she was told. She knew she had been foolish to try to run away, but even her senseless act did not affect her as much as did the words Josh had spoken in trying to quiet her as they walked back.
What sort of man was this who would actually admit that not only did he understand the reasoning behind what she had done, but in like circumstances, he would have done the same? She watched him from the corner of her eye, wondering what the outcome of her failed escape would ultimately be. But the expression on Josh Daniels’s face told her nothing, nor did the tone of his voice, which was flat and without emotion as he told her to gather kindling so he could get a fire started.
Before she could move away she heard him give a deep sigh, and with a look of resignation on his handsome face, he looped a rope around her waist, giving her several yards of slack before securing the other end about his own body.
Meagan was unable to suppress the sob that rose to her lips.
“What’s wrong now?” he demanded impatiently.
She lifted the rope in her hand. “Now I truly feel like a slave,” she replied.
Josh looked at Meagan. He looked at the rope and then he said, “So do I!”
* * *
With Meagan lashed to his belt, Josh managed to turn the horse out to graze, make a fire and distribute the last of the pemmican and bread between them. He then spread blankets on the ground and motioned Meagan to lie down on one of them while he stretched his body across the other.
“You can’t expect me to sleep there,” she squeaked as she realized his intention. “The judge specifically forbade us to sleep together.”
Josh looked at the girl. At first he thought she was trying to pull a fast one, but the concern on her face and the tears reflected in her eyes told him different.
“We’re not sleeping together. You have your blanket, I have mine. Now be quiet and go to sleep.” He handed her an extra blanket, but Meagan remained standing, unsure as to the exact meaning of Judge Osborne’s orders.
In pure exasperation, Josh gave the rope a tug and toppled the girl over onto him.
“Jumpin’ Jehoshaphat, you’re freezing!” He jumped to his feet, dragging her with him. “Get out of that wet dress,” he ordered. Then, seeing the look on her face, added, “You got something more to wear, don’t you?”
Meagan had other clothes, but she certainly couldn’t change into them while bound to this man’s belt like a partridge.
“You’ll have to untie me so I can change,” Meagan told him. “I can’t get my clothing off or on trussed up with this rope.”
Josh grumbled all the way to the wagon as they retrieved her bundle. The minute he untied Meagan he expected her to run. “Will you give me your word that you won’t try to escape again?”
Meagan’s eyes searched the shadows. The fact that she did not care to explore the dangers of the night reflected in her expression. “I won’t try to run away,” she promised.
“Very well.” He thrust the bundle of clothes into her arms and untied the noose about her waist. “If you try to run this time I’ll never believe another thing you say.”
“You haven’t believed anything up to now, so what’s the difference?” she asked aloud, but for some reason, there was a difference.
With all her worldly possessions in her arms, Meagan had actually given consideration to trying once more to escape. Nothing had seemed as devastating as spending the rest of her life in virtual slavery. But Josh’s threat never to believe her brought her up short.
It mattered that Josh should know he could believe her. It mattered that he might someday be willing to trust her, regardless of the circumstances that had thrust them together. “I told you I wouldn’t run away again,” she said defensively, and slipped behind the questionable protection of a small bush where she changed into dry clothing.
After spreading her dress near the warmth of the fire, Meagan realized that Josh had taken her at her word and spread her blankets on the side of the fire opposite his. With a grateful smile she lay down and pulled the blanket over her shoulders. Even with the warmth of the little fire the night was cool, and her teeth continued their incessant chattering no matter how she tried to silence them. The dress she wore was lightweight gingham and did little to protect her from the cold.
The tribulations of the previous weeks had taken their toll, and even though Meagan fell into a troubled sleep her thoughts would not allow her to rest.
As the night wore on a light rain began to fall. Josh cursed under his breath. Above the sounds of the night he could hear Meagan’s teeth chattering and the little sobs she emitted during her sleep.
Picking up his bedding, Josh got to his feet and went over to awaken the girl. “Come with me,” he ordered once she opened her eyes, her expression a mixture of bewilderment and dread.
Obediently Meagan followed, half dragging her damp blankets. Josh threw an oilcloth under the wagon and quickly spread his blanket over it. “Get under there.” He shoved her toward the wagon and she obeyed without argument.
Even when he joined her beneath the shelter of the wagon she did not speak. It never occurred to Josh that she had clamped her mouth closed so he would not hear her teeth chatter. But Meagan could not hold her mouth closed forever, and before she could be certain Josh was sleeping her teeth again began clacking in her mouth and her body shook so violently she could have sworn it shook the ground.
She felt the tears squeeze from her eyes and burn down her cheeks. Then a hand closed on her shoulder and rolled her onto her side.
Without a word Josh pressed her against the warmth of his body. Within minutes his body heat permeated her clothing, skin and bones. She wanted to object to the close proximity. She knew she should object, but his warmth was like a narcotic. The chill dissipated from her body, leaving it soft and pliable against his. Her whole being relaxed as she inhaled the scent of buckskin, brandy and man.
For the first time since the death of her father, Meagan was able to relax. Her fate had been decided for her. Her future laid out without any possibility of deviation. She might spend the rest of her life serving this man and his family, but she would never stop trying to prove her innocence. The very fact that she was to remain near the scene of Lily’s death gave her hope that someday she would find a way to clear her name.
She felt herself drifting off to sleep and forced herself to whisper drowsily, “The judge said we shouldn’t sleep together.”
Josh absently patted her arm. “Don’t worry about it,” he said. “I’m not going to sleep.” And he knew it was true, because the sweet agony of again holding a woman’s soft body in his arms was enough to keep him from batting an eye—especially a woman who had caused his wife’s death. The memory would no doubt haunt him for many sleepless nights to come.
Chapter Two (#ulink_bc76ac6c-5ff6-5858-ac24-101873eef67e)
They rose with the sun. After breaking their fast, Meagan gathered up her dress and climbed up onto the wagon seat where Josh waited. Without a word they started off down the rutted road toward their destination. But the day was all but spent when Josh finally drew Meagan from her reverie. “There it is,” he said.
Meagan’s eyes swept the valley below.
The land was rich and fertile. The green of the grass and trees was vibrant, and the earth black and rich.
Josh skillfully guided the horses along the narrow road, opened the gates and stopped the wagon between the house and the barn.
