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Debra’s silence confirmed Angie’s thoughts.
“How was the group?”
“Fine, fine.” Debra busied her hands with settling her coat and her purse; she rested her knitting on her lap. Knitting or anything fiber-related could always lift her mother’s spirits.
“What are you making now?” Angie stared at the ball of pink fuzz in Debra’s lap. She hoped it wasn’t something for her.
Debra laughed. “It looks alive, doesn’t it? It’s a new yarn. I thought it’d be perfect for your future niece or nephew.”
Of course. It was for Blair and Stella’s baby.
Angie tried to focus on how great Blair and Stella had been this morning. They weren’t pregnant yet, but Angie had no doubt they would be soon. In the most perfect manner, and everyone would know about it.
Blair’s twin, Brian, wasn’t married yet. But his growing relationship with “the blonde” Blair had mentioned was promising.
And then there was Angie.
Angie glanced up from the yarn into her mother’s green eyes. Mom’s red hair still corkscrewed around her face, the longer locks a halo about her head. Debra wore an expression reserved for her tough-love moments.
Angie gave a mental groan.
“Are you planning to tell me what’s going on or do I have to extract it out of you over this entire pot of tea?”
Angie squirmed at her mother’s tone, and the immediate flush of anger at her own childishness annoyed her.
“I’m pregnant.”
How’s that for an adult statement?
Debra’s mouth dropped open and the sound of her ceramic mug hitting the marble mosaic table reverberated.
“You’re not!”
“I am, Mom, and I’d appreciate it if you wouldn’t even start.”
Angie watched as the struggle between tears and joy played across Debra’s face. If Angie wasn’t so afraid it would make her throw up again, she would have laughed.
“I don’t believe it, Mom. You’re actually speechless.”
“This is wonderful—but you said you never wanted chil—”
“Mom, I said don’t start. I mean it.”
“What do you expect, Angie? My only daughter tells me she’s having my grandchild and I’m supposed to—what? Be quiet?” Debra picked up her tea and gulped down a huge swig.
“Ouch!” She grimaced as she burned her tongue.
“Are you okay, Mom?”
“I’m fine.” Debra took a deep breath. She turned her head to the side, her gaze aimed at the huge picture window that looked onto the entrance of the café. But Angie knew Debra wasn’t seeing anything but her own thoughts.
Debra turned her face back toward Angie and smiled. “Oh, honey. I’ve always dreamed of this. I mean, your brother and Stella, they’re trying and that’s wonderful, but there’s something so special about your own daughter having a baby.” Debra eyed Angie over her mug. She wasn’t done.
“You have other things to consider, sweetheart. You are older.” Debra reached over and Angie welcomed the warmth of her mother’s hand clasping hers.
“Mom, I’m older than you were when you had us, but I’m not ancient, for heaven’s sake.”
“What does Jesse think?”
Angie looked at her mother.
Debra looked back at her, face expectant. Until realization clouded in her eyes and pursed her lips.
“You have told him?”
“Uh, no, not yet. Ughh.”
Angie gripped the arms of her chair and inhaled deeply. Her stomach was doing the tango again. Apparently the ginger tea wasn’t working its charm.
“No, I haven’t told him. What’s the point in worrying him when he’s so far away? I don’t want him to worry about anything while he’s in such a hotspot.”
“Honey, don’t you think Jesse would be thrilled to know? That it might give him the extra strength he needs when he’s dealing with some of his tougher cases?”
“I haven’t even told him I’ve permanently relocated to Buffalo.”
“You what?” Debra’s eyebrows rose so high on her forehead that Angie wondered if they would completely disappear under her copper bangs.
“I didn’t tell him I’ve moved out here.” Angie stared at her glass of tea. It kept the heat flaring out of Debra’s eyes from blistering her skin.
“Why not?”
“Lots of reasons. Last year, after I did my dissertation, this opportunity came up. Jesse didn’t want to talk about relocating anywhere until he finished his mission. But I couldn’t turn down the opportunity to work in Buffalo. He thinks I’m out here for a trial run.”
She’d grown tired of her job as resident meteorologist at a local TV station in the Bay Area and had promised herself she’d find something more challenging once she completed her Ph.D. She’d never had to be on television, thank God, but she needed more challenge than the job offered—fairly superficial behind-the-scenes analysis of weather patterns.
That meant she’d had to leave California and life as she and Jesse had known it. Jesse thought it was all temporary, that they’d go back to California if the “experimental” career changes didn’t work for either one of them. But she’d decided on her own to make her position permanent.
She didn’t want to think about the dangers Jesse faced today and every day since he’d left. He was a top neurosurgeon and when the chance had arisen to help save lives in Iraq, he took it with no hesitation.
“That’s why you’ve been so dodgy whenever I asked how long your contract is with NOAA.” Debra knew Angie had landed a coveted position with the National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration in Buffalo.
“I’m here to stay, Mom. I want the baby to know my family, to have cousins. In San Francisco I’d be on my own.”
And reminded too much of what she might lose with Jesse. She didn’t want him to think she’d “tricked” him into the pregnancy. They’d both had a good time that night and she’d had no indication that she was fertile. Up until now, their protective measures had worked….
“You know your father and I support you, honey.”
“Mom, don’t go blaming yourself for this. This has nothing to do with you or Dad or our color.”
Angie was well aware that her mom often wondered if their children suffered because of their interracial background. Debra was from a Polish-American family in one of Buffalo’s poorer suburbs.
Dad was from an educated African-American family and had grown up in an affluent neighborhood. Debra had been her family’s first to go to college and to have a real career. Will was just another son in a long line of college-graduate professionals.
Angie considered herself both black and white, although she knew many people saw her as African-American, especially in areas that were still predominately white. She’d been born with her dad’s curly hair and the lighter brown skin of her paternal grandmother. She had Debra’s green eyes.
On the West Coast, in the anonymity and cultural diversity of San Francisco, she’d never felt her skin color was an issue. She’d been free to become the woman she was today.
“You know, I have a better idea of what you’re going through than you realize.”
“Really, Mom?” Angie tried to keep her tone neutral, but if she had a cookie for every time Mom said she “knew” what Angie was feeling, Angie would weigh three hundred pounds.
“Seriously, Angie. I was younger, it was a different era, but I expected to raise you on my own.”
“You were married, though.”
“Well, after I was pregnant with you. As a matter of fact, it was after I’d had you.”
“After I was born?”
Debra steadied her gaze on Angie. “Your dad and I were almost—” she shook her head “—no, we were high-school sweethearts. Or at least we were meant to be.”
Heat rushed into Angie’s face as she stared at her mother. “Why don’t I already know this?”
Debra flicked her fingers against her mug. “No reason to bring it up before. Do you really want to know the details?”
Angie didn’t hesitate. “Yes. And start with the high-school stuff.”
CHAPTER FIVE
February 1967
Buffalo, New York
“YOU HAVE A LOT of homework this weekend?”
Will looked at Debra with what she thought were the most beautiful brown eyes on earth.
“Not too much.” She felt suddenly shy as they stood on the sidewalk where the school bus had dropped them off minutes ago. Cars whizzed past on the busy street Kenmore Avenue had become as they’d grown up.
“Trigonometry going okay?” Will always asked how she was doing. Deb was taking all advanced courses, so although she was only a sophomore she was well on her way to college-level credits by her junior and senior years.
Just like Will.
“Yeah. I did have a bit of trouble with this one problem, but I’ll get it.”
“Why don’t I help you?”
Deb smiled at Will and nodded. “That’d be great.” Truth was, she didn’t need any help. From the beginning, school had been her escape and now promised to be her ticket out of the Buffalo neighborhood her entire family seemed to live in. College would be her passport to a better life.
“Let’s go over to my house and I’ll get my notes from two years ago. Then we can work in Dad’s office.”
“Great.” Although going to his house made her nervous, she fell into step beside Will, marveling, as she often did, at how well they spent time together. They were both excellent students and enjoyed a lot of the same literature.
But she’d become aware of a tension between them over the past year or so. Nothing bad, just…different. She knew what it was; she’d had crushes on boys before. But they’d always faded.
And Will always remained her best friend.
“I’ll wait for you in the office while you get your notebook, okay?” This was their usual routine. Deb waited in Dr. Bradley’s office, while Will got what he needed from his house.
Debra didn’t go over to Will’s anymore. They’d stopped hanging out in his house a few years back, when Will started high school. His mom wasn’t keen on it. Said their age difference was too great.
Deb’s mom didn’t really know how many afternoons Deb spent studying with Will. Deb would never dare bring Will home. It was an unspoken rule that Deb’s mom and extended family wouldn’t go for her bringing a black boy to the house, even as a friend.
Deb told her mother as little as possible. She still worked for Will’s dad in the doctor’s office and didn’t raise an eyebrow whenever Deb and Will came in and did homework there the way they used to as kids. The office was neutral territory. Most days, though, they went to the public library.
“I’d like it if you came with me to the house, Deb.” Will had a strange look on his face. Deb wondered if something had happened at school that Will needed to talk about.
“Well, okay, I guess.” She trudged through the slush alongside him. The heavy snowfall from last week had melted into this mess, but would freeze up again by nightfall.
“Thanks.” Will loped comfortably next to her, but she still sensed an uneasiness in him.
“Is everything okay, Will?”
“Yeah, yeah, everything’s great. And don’t worry about Mama, she’s at her charity work today.”
Relief washed over Debra. So Will’s house was empty, unless their housekeeper was still there. Mrs. Bradley was nothing but polite to her. But Angie understood she was persona non grata in Violet’s opinion. White and poor. Not a match for Will.
As they got to the house, the wind picked up.
“The storm’s coming in quick.” Deb lifted her face to the breeze that was getting colder by the minute.
“You’ve loved storms since we were kids.” Will stared at her and she gazed back at him.
“Yes, I suppose I have. You noticed that?”
“I notice more than you ever realize, Deb.”
Will’s handsome face looked so good to Deb. But she noticed the twitch along his jawline.
He kept staring at her as though he’d never seen her before.
“What is it, Will?”
He swallowed visibly and drew in a deep breath.
“Deb, you know I’m going to Howard University in the fall.”
The pain that pinched her stomach frightened her.
