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“Please, Luke. Think about Ben, not yourself. We can give him everything he needs to become the best that he can be. So please, if you care about him at all, just walk away. It will be the most unselfish and noble thing you could ever do for your son... Maybe when your life’s more settled and secure and you can guarantee that you’ll always be there for him, we can reconsider.”
He hadn’t agreed; he’d never agreed. He’d walked away from her that day with his emotions laid bare. Was she right? he’d asked himself again and again. Was he really being selfish in wanting to be in his son’s life? Ben didn’t need him; that was for sure. The boy had everything, so maybe he should just back off as Mollie had suggested, until he could walk back into Ben’s life and make him proud to be his son. He’d always felt like a failure to his dad and he didn’t want to be a failure to his son, too.
He’d done as Mollie had asked, but still tore himself apart over his decision, until he’d seen the job posting for a handyman position at Flight and it had seemed like a sign. Working around kids who needed help seemed like a good way to make a difference, since he’d been totally unable to have an impact on his own son’s life...yet.
Of course, he hadn’t given Mike all the details in his office that day, but he hoped he’d said enough to make it clear that he regretted not being in Ben’s life up until now.
Splashing cold water on his face, Luke grimaced at the spot of blood on his chin. It seemed he couldn’t even shave now without losing concentration.
Luke made himself a strong coffee and sat at his desk, his mind still spinning. It was seven years since he’d walked away from that meeting with Mollie, and he hated himself for agreeing to do as she had asked. He’d been wrong to stay away—he should have fought to see his son. He should have moved heaven and earth to be in his life... He’d known it the minute Ben had stepped through Mike’s office door just a few short weeks ago. And if he’d been around to spread the load when things started to go wrong for the Jacksons, maybe Ben wouldn’t have needed a special school at all. And maybe not having a dad in his life was partly what had caused Ben’s emotional issues in the first place.
The information they’d been given by the social worker was that Ben had been becoming more and more difficult for his elderly grandparents to handle. Jim was ill and Mollie had to spend a lot of time looking after him, so Ben had been left to his own devices most of the time. He’d been missing a lot of school, wandering around town until supper. Ben’s school had gotten the social worker involved after a local store had contacted them about one of their students stealing candy.
Apparently, things had first begun to go wrong after Carly had died several months earlier. That unexpected piece of information had left Luke shocked and angry. Mollie should have told him about Carly; he would have stepped in. She’d obviously kept the news from him because she was worried that he’d want to play a part in Ben’s life...and he would have, if he’d known the whole story, but he’d never have tried to take him away from them, if that was what she was worried about. The boy had been allowed to run wild and lost his way, and now it was up to Luke to try to instill some discipline into his son’s life, to teach him right and wrong. It was one of the few things from Luke’s own childhood that he could impart. He wouldn’t be where he was today if it wasn’t for the rules and structure he’d been made to follow when he was young.
In that first awkward meeting, just before Gwen had taken Ben to settle him in, Luke had tried to talk to him.
“It’s so nice to finally meet you, Ben,” he’d said. “And you don’t need to worry because I’ll be looking out for you.”
Ben had met his eyes then for the first time since he’d walked into the room; his brown eyes were dark with hurt and anger.
“I don’t want you!” he’d shouted. “And I don’t want to be here.”
The boy’s slight body had seemed to crumple, and when he’d rubbed his eyes fiercely to keep the tears at bay, Luke had taken a step toward him, needing to do something, anything that might make his son realize that everything was going to be okay. Ben shrank away from him, though, and instead of just following his instincts and giving him a hug, Luke had hesitated and glanced helplessly at Gwen.
“Right, Ben,” Gwen had announced briskly, trying to defuse the situation. “We have a lovely room ready for you, so why don’t you and I go find it and meet some of the other children here. You’ll see your gran again before she goes, don’t worry.”
Ben had jumped up to follow her at once. Anything, it seemed, to escape from the stranger who had just walked into his life, the stranger who they’d told him was his dad.
“Why don’t you and Mollie go somewhere private to catch up,” Gwen had suggested. “Then perhaps you’ll understand the situation a bit better.”
“Good idea,” Mike had agreed. “Lily and I will do the necessary paperwork.”
Lily was Ben’s social worker. Luke remembered how shocked he’d felt in that moment. Paperwork! It had seemed so wrong to talk about forms in the same context as planning the life of a child.
“A necessary evil, I’m afraid,” Mike had remarked, noting his expression. “We have to follow the paper trail. Now, why don’t you get Mollie a hot drink and a sandwich before she heads back. You can talk in the small sitting room.”
It had been both strange and strained, being alone with Mollie. She was obviously trying to keep the lid on her emotions. She’d told him what she thought he needed to know: Carly had died in a car accident in London, where she had been working. Jim was ill and without him around their car sales business had gone rapidly downhill and started losing money. Mollie was overwhelmed. Basically, she’d admitted, as she twisted her wedding ring on her finger, she had gotten to a point where she just couldn’t cope anymore, and it was Ben who’d suffered. Taken up with her own worries about business, Jim’s illness and grieving for her daughter, she’d neglected Ben, giving him none of the attention he’d been accustomed to. He’d become cheeky with her, moody, and gone out of his way to cause trouble in any way he could. Once the social worker got involved after Ben’s shoplifting incident, they’d suggested giving her some respite by sending Ben to a school for children who needed help.
“I just hope that I’ve done the right thing,” she’d murmured, breaking down. “But what other choice did I have?”
That comment had set off Luke. “You had me!” he’d cried. “You should have told me what was going on, let me help.”
“But that’s why I asked if he could come here, to Flight,” Mollie had explained. “Now you can help him.”
After Mollie left, Luke had tried to digest everything she’d told him. Why had she kept him in the dark about Carly’s death? And she’d talked about Jim being ill...diagnosed with what, cancer?
Still, he was glad for the opportunity to keep a close eye on his son and finally have some input into his upbringing. And maybe one day... Maybe one day Ben would be able to forgive him for abandoning him. Luke had told himself that he’d done the right thing by leaving his son in what he’d believed to be a stable and loving environment—an environment he didn’t believe he’d been capable of providing—but he’d been wrong. He just hoped that it wasn’t too late to make things right.
Which was why he couldn’t let someone like Kat compromise his son’s well-being. Ben was his responsibility now, and Luke didn’t intend to let anyone put him at risk. He was sorry for slamming the door in Kat’s face, but everything she did was out of order. Ben could have drowned trying to swim in the sea, and who knew what might happen if she was allowed to go ahead with her animal-therapy idea. He’d talk to Mike tomorrow, he decided, and try to make him understand just how dangerous some of her sessions truly were.
Ten minutes later, with a surge of fresh determination, Luke headed outside across the garden to the dining room, hoping he hadn’t missed dinner. The large room was almost empty and the tables were clear, apart from one at the very end of the room, where three children were still eating. Recognizing them at once as Ben’s classmates, he headed across to join them on impulse.
“Any food to spare?” Luke asked brightly, sitting down. “I’m a bit late for dinner, I’m afraid.”
Dennis Baker, a skinny boy with a shock of red hair, just shrugged. “Help yourself. We’ve just about finished anyway.”
“Seen Ben around?” Luke asked casually before biting into a grilled cheese sandwich.
They looked at each other and giggled. “Ben’s never around, at least not with us,” Dennis said.
Luke frowned. “Oh, and why is that?”
“’Cause he’s weird,” explained Dennis.
“He doesn’t go around with anyone,” Dan Kent, the boy on Dennis’s right, blurted out. “Or talk to anyone.”
Luke held back a rush of anger. It was hard not to get emotional when it came to Ben. “Dan, do you remember how you felt when you first came here? You have to try and help new children fit in here, not put them down.”
“We’ll try and help him, then, Mr. Luke,” Dennis agreed. “If you give us a fiver.”
All three boys, including Johnny Cartwright, who’d been silent until now, broke into a fit of giggles. Luke’s frustration surged again. What chance did Ben have of becoming a well-adjusted boy with kids like these around to goad him?
CHAPTER FOUR (#u4bfd1649-88da-5881-924d-3357804c4c0d)
THE AROMA OF coffee filled the air as Kat headed along the hallway. Tempted, she followed the scent to the dining room, surprised to see that it was empty, apart from a few boys sitting at one end of the table. Luke was with them, she noted with surprise.
Dennis and Dan were giggling together, while Johnny looked on in awe. She could see by the set of Luke’s shoulders that he was angry about something; when wasn’t he angry, though?
Wondering if she might have to intervene, she strode toward the small group. She knew Dennis only too well, and Luke’s face was dark with contained fury.
“What’s going on here?” she asked in what she hoped was a breezy tone.
Luke swung around, and for a moment, she thought she saw a flicker of relief on his face. “This young man,” he announced, “is trying to bribe me.”
The giggling stopped as quickly as it had started when the children saw Kat. “Wasn’t me, Miss,” Dennis quickly announced.
“He told me he would only look out for Ben if I gave him a fiver,” Luke said.
Kat frowned. “Is that true, Dennis?”
“Ben’s weird,” Dennis responded. “So why would I want to look out for him, anyway?”
Kat pulled out a chair and sat down. “You know why, Dennis. We all look out for each other at Flight. A lot of the kids here have had troubles, including you. You were very unhappy when you first came to Flight, remember? Didn’t people help you?”
Dennis stared at the table and shrugged. “I guess.”
“So hasn’t it occurred to you that maybe Ben is unhappy and homesick, too?”
“Dunno,” he muttered.
“Well, did people help you when you needed it?”
“Might of.”
“There you go, then,” Kat said, smiling. “So you’ll help Ben?”
“I guess.”
“Thanks, Dennis. That’s really kind of you. Isn’t it, Mr. Luke?”
Put on the spot, Luke nodded. “Yes, thank you, Dennis. I guess you were only joking about the fiver?”
Dennis pulled a face. “I guess so. Come on, you two. Let’s go.”
As the three children raced off, Kat laughed out loud. “Bribed by a nine-year-old!”
Suddenly Luke was laughing, too. “Want a sandwich?” he asked, handing her the plate.
“Don’t mind if I do,” she said.
They ate in silence for a minute or two. “You’re good with kids,” Luke said eventually.
“It’s my job,” Kat reminded him. “Surely you must understand children, too, though, having worked here for ages.”
Luke shook his head slowly. “Not really. My job description covers everything from mending fences to placing orders for school supplies, but I haven’t had much contact with the kids. That’s more yours and Mike’s department...and Gwen’s, of course.”
“I’m sorry for insinuating that you don’t love Ben,” Kat said abruptly. “I crossed a line.”
“And I apologize for slamming the door in your face,” Luke offered.
Kat held his gaze. “We’re never going to agree, you know.”
Luke nodded. “At least not when it comes to your therapy courses.” He pushed the plate toward her. “Have another sandwich.”
Kat picked up an egg salad sandwich and nibbled at the edges. “You wait until I start with the animal therapy,” she said.
Luke stood, scraping back his chair. “We’ll have to agree to disagree about that. Anyway, I should get going.”
“Before we have another falling-out?” Kat asked, raising her eyebrows.
“Something like that,” he said with the hint of a smile.
* * *
KAT WAS STILL thinking about her conversation with Luke twenty minutes later as she walked along the cliff-top path to the village. Flight was set up high, way beyond the risk of high tides. Kat looked out across the bay, which sparkled in the evening sun. The sea shone with crimson light, and a few late gulls were circling, screaming out their lonesome cries before settling down for the night. It was heartrendingly beautiful here, she thought with a sudden rush of emotion, feeling happy about her decision to take this job, despite her problems with Luke.
Perhaps his reaction earlier—and his attitude toward the sea therapy—boiled down to fear. Maybe Luke was just scared—scared of the responsibility that had been thrust upon him.
Kat was good at understanding what made people tick and why, and not just the children in therapy with her, either. In her view, most adults were still affected by their childhoods and how they were raised. She’d seen it again and again in the foster homes she’d lived in as a teen, observing the ways people reacted and dealt with things. Her own childhood had taught her a lot about life, once she’d come to understand it, or at least tried to. Luke was angry because he was out of his depth with his son, but he should be letting her help Ben, not going against her.
As she followed the path down toward the shore, she considered her plans for the animal therapy. At her last placement, she’d virtually run the unit. The kids helped care for the animals while learning to understand their behavior and needs. The way the animals depended on them gave the kids a sense of responsibility, and the animals’ resilience and trust often gave them a whole new perspective on life. She hoped to start something similar—with fresh ideas, of course—here at Flight. Getting past the red tape was the biggest obstacle, especially when narrow-minded people like Luke Travis were raising objections at every turn.
A row of cottages stood next to the shore and were set on a limestone outcropping just above the high-tide line along a narrow track named Cove Road. She’d noticed the cottages before, but tonight in the half-light their brightly lit windows drew her toward them. Terraced and small, they were each two stories with neat front doors and welcoming windows. What a wonderful place to live, Kat thought: to wake up beside the sea each morning, staring out at the glorious, restless and ever-changing view.
The first of the three appeared to be occupied. Clothing flapped on a line at the back, a child’s bike lay discarded on the front walk and a light shone from somewhere inside. The second cottage was dark; it appeared closed and empty and kind of sad, its exterior pebble-dashed and a dull, weathered gray. The one at the very end, however, was painted a bright, fresh shade of white. It looked loved, she thought. A sign in the front window caught her eye and she went closer to read it. It was handwritten with For Rent in bold print.
Excitement prickled as an idea took root and grew. The cottage was close to Flight. It was by the sea. It was perfect.
Unable to wait, Kat dialed the number on the sign. The call went to voice mail. “Hi, it’s Elsa. Sorry I’m not here right now...”
The voice was clear and warm with a slightly melodic accent, but Kat’s heart sank. What if the cottage had already been rented? Pushing her phone back into her pocket, Kat walked cautiously along the pathway to the bright red front door and tried the number again.
She decided to leave a message. “Um... I was just inquiring about the cottage for rent in Jenny Brown’s Bay...” Kat left her contact information then clicked End.
Certain that there was no one inside, she walked around the side of the cottage and peered over a door in the fence that led into a small backyard. Everything looked spick-and-span, obviously recently redone. She had to have this cottage; she just had to.
Night was settling in as she headed back toward Flight, wondering how long it would take this Elsa person to reply to her call. The wind rose in her ears, whipping through the crooked bushes that lined the path, and she gazed out across the bay, remembering.
Sandston, the place where she’d spent her early childhood and the place where her mother’s sad life had ended, was not unlike Jenny Brown’s Bay. It felt right to be here.
Suddenly, her phone began to ring and she dug it from her pocket.
“Hi, you were asking about Number Three Cove Cottages.”
“Oh, y-yes...” She felt stupid, childish, stuttering. This meant so much to her. “Is it still available?”
“It might be. I did have someone interested, but they weren’t one-hundred-percent sure.”
“I’m a hundred-percent sure. Please. It’s exactly what I’m looking for.”
“Well, the thing is,” Elsa said, “I won’t just rent it to anyone. It has strong emotional ties for me and, to be honest, I’d rather just live there myself.”
Kat instantly liked the woman’s honesty. “Why don’t you, then?” she asked.
“I intend to one day, but my husband, Bryn—” the name rolled softly off her tongue “—has a lot of commissions in Cornwall, so we need to stay around there. Our children, Emma and Mick, are settled in schools here, too, and we don’t want to uproot them unless it’s absolutely necessary. But tell me more about yourself.”
“Well, I’m a child therapist working at Flight,” Kat explained hopefully. “And I really do love the cottage.”
There was a pause on the other end, but when Elsa spoke again, she sounded like she’d made up her mind. “Call me back tomorrow with all your details, and I’ll sort out a lease.”
Kat was ecstatic. “Thank you so much! I’ll call you first thing.”
She was climbing the steep track to Flight, her head in the clouds and her whole body aglow with excitement about her new home, when she heard footsteps coming up behind her. She carried on, trying to hurry, but the footsteps grew closer.
“Do you deliberately turn up wherever I happen to be?” Luke’s deep voice made her jump.
“I could say the same to you,” she responded, turning to see his tall figure striding toward her.
