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She picked up the mail, placed the bills in one pile and dropped the junk mail in another. There was one envelope that was obviously neither. She opened it and felt sick. It was an invitation to her ten-year high school reunion, the last Saturday in August at the Bayfront Convention Center.
Her heart sank. She didn’t want to go. She doubted that Merrill or Ava would be there, and other than the two of them, there was no one she really wanted to see. Actually, she wasn’t even sure she wanted to see Merrill and Ava. They’d kept in touch, but only just barely since high school.
She didn’t want to look back. There was nothing to be gained by it.
“Aud,” Clinton and Bea shouted in unison.
Audrey crumpled the invitation and put it in the recycle pile. She turned her attention to the kids.
“It’s official,” Clinton announced. “We’re on summer vacation.”
“And Willow finally convinced Mr. Williams to let her mow his lawn,” Audrey said.
“Good for you, Willow,” Clinton called up the stairs. Audrey guessed the girl had made a beeline for her bedroom, confirmed moments later by the sound of a door slamming.
Clinton was only a year younger than Willow, but in so many ways he was much older. He’d grown up too soon and she knew that part of that was her fault. She felt a familiar stab of pain. She’d done her best to give him a childhood, but she wasn’t always sure that her best had been good enough. At least she had given him security and a family.
“I thought we’d go to the beach to celebrate the official start to our summer and Willow’s successful campaign.”
“Sunset,” Bea squealed. “Our first one of the year. It’s still too cold to swim, right?”
It had been a brutal winter that hadn’t given way to spring until almost April. Two months hadn’t been enough to warm the Great Lake up enough for Audrey to swim, or even dunk her toes. “Well, too cold for me,” she told the ten-year-old.
Bea’s long brown braid bounced against her back. Bianca Cruz was built of sturdier stuff than Audrey. Over the winter, while Audrey had dressed in layers, Bea had walked around barefoot. “I’ll put my suit on just in case.”
“A sunset?” Willow said as she came back into the room and stared at her foster siblings. “Really, that’s your idea of a celebration?” She walked up to the counter, grabbed an apple and then went up the stairs again. Moments later, her bedroom door slammed.
“I don’t think she’s impressed,” Clinton said with typical dry humor.
“That’s because she hasn’t experienced one yet,” Audrey said with more optimism than she felt.
“You might not win her over, Aud,” he said softly. “You might have to concede to that someday.”
“It doesn’t matter. She needs us, even if she doesn’t want to admit it. Everyone needs someone. I was lucky that I had you to work for, to fight for. And now Willow’s got us, even if she doesn’t want us.”
Clinton was too old to hug much anymore, but he made an exception this once and squeezed her tight. He was taller than she was now.
“All we can do is try,” Clinton said with his old-man wisdom.
Audrey nodded. “Let’s make short work of dinner so we can get out to the beach in time for that sunset.”
* * *
A COUPLE HOURS LATER, she sat on a blanket, one arm wrapped around the very damp Bea, watching as the sun neared the edge of the horizon.
It had been a lovely evening. She’d even coaxed Willow into joining the family selfie. Now, if only she could get the girl to enjoy herself.
“Really, you guys, this isn’t a celebration, it’s a...” Willow started to complain again.
“Shh,” Bea said. “We’ll miss it.” Her teeth chattered as she pulled the towel more tightly around her.
Audrey still couldn’t believe that Bea had braved the lake. No one else would join her. Not even Clinton, and Bea could normally persuade him to do almost anything.
“Miss what?” Willow asked.
Bea’s teeth chattered as she said, “Audrey knows a lady who owns a chocolate shop in town. The lady says if you listen hard enough, sometimes you can hear the sun hiss when it hits the water.”
Willow scoffed. “Oh, come on...”
Audrey caught Clinton glaring at Willow, as if warning her against hurting Bea’s feelings. His look was enough to shut down Willow’s rant before it really started.
They all knew that logically they’d never hear the sun hit the water, but that didn’t stop them from trying every summer.
Slowly, the sun drew closer and closer to the distant horizon where Lake Erie met the sky. The clouds overhead parted just enough to allow a small band of color to show through. Tonight it was a brilliant pinkish orange.
Seconds later the sun sank below the horizon and disappeared, the color of the sky fading to a lavender blue.
Audrey let out the breath she hadn’t realized she was holding.
“Did anyone hear it?” Bea asked.
“Not this time,” Audrey said.
“Me, neither.” Clinton shrugged. “Guess we’ll have to try again next week.”
“How about you?” Audrey asked Willow.
The teenager shook her head. “Of course I didn’t. That’s really stupid.”
“Aud’s friend says when her son was little, they always listened,” Clinton admonished. “They thought they heard it once.”
Willow looked as if she was going to argue, but Audrey headed her off. “We all know it’s just a charming story, Willow. But like a favorite fairy tale, we enjoy it. We come out weekly during the summer to try and hear that hiss.”
Willow shook her head again. “You guys are really weird. Seriously, really weird.”
Rather than take offence, Clinton laughed. “You’ve only been here a few months. You don’t know the half of it.”
Willow gave them one more disgusted look, then stalked toward the car.
“She’s doing better,” Bea mused. “I thought she’d be meaner about the sunset.”
“Me, too,” Audrey admitted. “We’ll win her over eventually.”
“You’ll win her over,” Bea said. “You and Clinton. She just doesn’t understand what it’s like to be loved. I know I was little, but I didn’t know, either, until Clinton, then you.”
Audrey gathered up their blanket, then followed her family back to the car.
It was time to go home.
CHAPTER TWO (#ulink_991701b2-3a3b-53f5-bb07-8157d45f09fb)
THE NEXT MORNING, Audrey woke up with a start. She was sweating and her breath came in fast, shallow gulps, as if she’d just run a race.
“Audrey, Audrey...” Someone was shaking her. She turned and saw Clinton staring down at her. He was pale and his expression was pinched with worry.
“You screamed this time,” he said. “You haven’t done that in a while.”
She scooted higher in the bed and leaned back against the pillow. “I’m so sorry I woke you up.”
He sat gingerly beside her. “Same dream?”
She nodded, though it wasn’t a dream. It was a nightmare—one she couldn’t escape.
One she shouldn’t escape.
It had to be the invitation to her reunion that had brought back the events of that awful night.
Audrey winced. She had a college degree and a job she loved. She owned her house. Well, along with the bank. And she had the family she’d always dreamed of.
She should be able to forget. She looked at Clinton.
No, never forget.
She just wished she could put the events of that night behind her. It had changed everything. That one moment had sent her life hurtling in a whole new direction.
She thought of Frost’s poem about two paths. At least the narrator had had a choice.
She took Clinton’s hand and he gave hers a squeeze.
She sometimes marveled at how many good things had also come from that one awful moment.
“Mom?” Bea called from the doorway. Most of the time, the kids called her Audrey, or even Aud, but on occasion Clinton and Bea called her Mom.
“Come on in, sweetie.” She patted the bed, and Bea took the invite, ran over and jumped in next to her. “So, basically, I woke up everyone?”
Bea snuggled close. “Yeah, but it’s okay. We’d have to get up soon, anyway. I started the coffee for you.”
“Wow, how did I get so lucky?” Audrey asked.
She heard the bathroom door slam down the hall.
“Not all that lucky,” Bea whispered. “You woke Willow up, too. She’s not happy about it.”
Clinton snorted. “She’s never happy.”
It had only been four months, Audrey reminded herself...again.
“Well, as long as we’re all up, let’s get our day started.” Audrey sat up in bed. “I’ve got to go into the office today for a meeting, so you guys are hanging out with Maggie May.”
“Are you going to hear about your project?” Clinton asked.
“Yes. I feel nervous every time I think about it.” She knew that even if the firm was awarded the project it wouldn’t be her project. She was too new, too young to be in charge, but it felt like hers.
She’d gone to work at Lebowitz Architecture expecting to do grunt work for years. But Mr. Lebowitz was a one-man firm, and because of that, it wasn’t long before he’d also let her take an active role in the houses he’d designed. She’d eventually helped at every stage, from planning through construction. She frequently drove by those houses, two of them in particular, simply to admire them.
But this new project was different.
The city had donated two downtown lots next to the old railroad tracks for a children’s education center with an emphasis on science and green technology. The plan was to stress innovation and include a small building for classes and lectures, a playground and a community garden area.
Audrey wanted the project so much she could taste it. Mr. Lebowitz had let her take the lead in putting together the firm’s proposal.
And she’d come up with the name for their submission: The Greenhouse—Growing Resources: Educating, Empowering Naturalists House.
Erie already had LEAF—the Lake Erie Arboretum at Frontier Park—on the west side of town and TREC—the Tom Ridge Environmental Center—at the base of the peninsula. The Greenhouse would both fit in with and complement the city’s existing educational centers.
If she got the job.
Well, if Lebowitz Architecture got it.
Clinton pulled her from her thoughts. “Me and Bea aren’t worried. You’ll get it all right. You’re too good not to.”
“I wish I felt as confident.” Having someone believe in her that much meant everything. She’d never got that kind of support from a family, but she’d had Ava and Merrill once upon a time. They’d believed she could do anything, just like the kids did now.
Audrey tried to shake off the nightmare’s residual dark blot. She couldn’t change the past, but she could make a better future.
Clinton, as always, seemed to sense the shift in her mood. Why wouldn’t he? He’d witnessed more of her nightmares and their aftermath than the others. “Come on, Audrey. You not only have LEED credentials, you practice what you preach. We’re the only people I know with a solar water heater and solar panels. You are the perfect architect for this project.” Clinton’s rust-colored hair was more unkempt than usual, and his crooked grin said he found her concerns amusing.
Maybe she’d lost Ava and Merrill after that terrible night, but she’d found Clinton, then Bea, and now Willow. She couldn’t control where her mind took her at night, but she was in charge during the day. She’d built a wonderful family that she was proud of and that’s what she would focus on.
She’d get this project and she’d win over Willow and...
“Let’s go, Aud,” Bea commanded. “Why don’t you get the first shower before Clinton? He takes so long so he’ll smell good for all the girrrrlllls, but it won’t help.”
Bea might not actually be related to Clinton by blood, but the ten-year-old was his little sister in every other way.
“Bea,” Clinton warned on cue, which sent the younger girl screeching down the hall.
In that moment, Clinton looked like any other kid might, as he smiled at Audrey before running after Bea.
A loud series of happy shrieks followed, then Willow screamed at the two of them to shut up, which only made them yell even louder.
The last vestiges of the nightmare sloughed away as Audrey crawled out of bed and grabbed her bathrobe.
When she stepped into the hall she came face-to-face with Willow, whose annoyance was palpable. “Seriously, what is wrong with you people? It’s not even eight in the morning and it’s summer vacation. This house is so freakin’ loud.”
“Sorry,” Audrey said. “I woke the kids.”
“You had your nightmare again?”
