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Fake Life
Fake Life
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Fake Life

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“Why aren’t you asleep?”

“I wish I was…,” the sleepy voice replied.

“What’s up?”

“I got woken up…are you sitting down?”

“I am in the car”

“Where the hell are you going at nine in the morning?”

“I just got done with the exam. Headed to Pushkin for late breakfast. Want me to pick you up?”

“How long do I have to get ready?”

Eva looked up at the driver.

“Sasha, we gotta pick Elly up. How long till we get there?”

“well, well, well… Here we go….”

Inside her head Eva wondered whether he will ever knock it off.

“Well, if there’s no traffic, maybe twenty minutes…” the driver said.

Eva got back on the phone.

“See you in five. Get ready quick I’m not gonna wait for you like last time.”

Sasha glanced over at Eva thought the rear-view mirror, clearly surprised.

“I guess I’ll have to skip make up then. I bet you’re all done up, though?” her friend asked.

“I haven’t even slept since last night! Got home, showered, changed and was off to college.”

“Girl, you’re crazy!”

“See you soon”

“Ok.”

Having finished the phone conversation Eva smiled to herself. She then noticed the surprised expression on her driver’s face, looking at her through the mirror.

“What?”

“I said twenty….”

“Come on, man. Do you actually believe she’ll get ready in twenty minutes? We’ll be waiting just as long, I’m telling you —” Eva said with regret in her tone. “I wish I hadn’t invited her, though. Now, I feel I am gonna be late for breakfast. All I wanted was to have a normal breakfast, after a night at a club. Not at five in the morning.”

“I don’t remember you ever having a normal breakfast, as you say… In fact, I don’t even remember you making it to college in time for the first class…”

“See… that’s what makes it tricky. Everyone’s going to work or study when we’re driving home after partying.”

“I’m used to it. Though, my wife gets unhappy….”

“Why?”

“She’s jealous.”

“Jealous of who?!” Eva’s face fell with surprise and a hint of disgust, as her inner voice was screaming trashy variants. Like jealous of Eva. Pshaw!

“Go figure what’s in her head,” Sasha sighed and frowned.

Eva felt amused as she pulled a pair of sunglasses out of her purse. On her smartphone, she selected her favorite playlist. Her favorite new school track, that her driver especially despised, was now playing. She turned the phone’s sound up, reached for another cigarette, and leaned back in the seat, having activated the massage feature. Perhaps, having massage seats wasn’t a bad idea after all. She was hoping Elly would be ready by the time they get there

Elly

My best friend lived in a historic pre-revolutionary building located in the very heart of downtown. The property’s beauty was hardly a consolation for lack of parking space. Elly lived with her mother and granny. They were one of those Intelligentsia families, Muscovites in multiple generations, as she would often claim. Her parents had long been divorced and the only thing she knew of her father was the fact he had gone away on an expedition and never returned. He did return though, only with another family. This fact, however, did not bother Elly in the slightest. That’s what she said and I had no reason not to believe my best friend. I trusted her with my life.

She always knew how to dress with taste, her natural beauty made up for the fact her family income wasn’t enough to afford the latest clothing collections. She possessed a look of a real model: long legs, a wasp waist, 5’11 height, and a pretty face with well-defined high cheekbones and beautiful plump lips. What seemed like a greater gift was her ability to eat everything she liked, without putting on any weight. Only a few could forgive such injustice, those who could not, called her a stuck-up bitch, or even a witch.

She attracted all kinds of men. From wealthy ones, or their offspring, to collegemates who would go out of their way to do anything for her. To pass her exams, for instance; Or spend an entire night outside her building, reciting love poems. She was spoiled with the attention of men, it seemed from the moment she was born, and that explained her cold, catty, and at times spiteful attitude she wouldn’t think twice to demonstrate. From time to time, it seemed she was even tired of all the admiration. Whether it was just an act or truth, it certainly added certain charm to her character. From all of her admirers she was drowned to those so-called trustafarians. In my mind, there was little room for a doubt she would soon be scoring her “golden ticket,” getting successfully, yet conveniently married. The “thick wallet” or perhaps his son she eventually will pick – will be her perfect companion. I strongly believed in it, even though could not openly endorse her approach. Elly didn’t mind. She was firmly convinced true love didn’t exist while material issues certainly did. It was a very important element of her belief system, that also featured much pride in her family name, quite prominent in the intellectual circles. She was a firm believer that any nouve riche – new rich, and his family would be honored to blend families with hers, and do everything for herself, her mother, and especially, her granny Rosa Markovna. To be honest, being surrounded by the people she chose to hang out with was never really my thing. However, I did that because she asked. I wasn’t a big fan of “jet set’ – trust funds children, and never missed an opportunity to point it out. I believe all they were was a gang of super-depended and degrading “dwarfs. I was happy not to be one of them. Yes, I myself may have been born into a wealthy family, but I was never a part of trust-fund babies club.

I remember debating about it at our favorite Italian restaurant.

“So, what are you then? A proletarian?” she would snide as I touched down on the subject. I thought of myself as being rebellious. Having a choice, will, and possibility not to hang out with them of course meant I had nothing to do with them.

“I am not on the jet set list, trust me on this one. Maybe ‘on papers’. But I refuse to be labeled. You know what my dad’s like. I am just a daughter of a wealthy man, awho still depends on him. That’s it. But I am Eva Isaeva. I am a person. You will see the day will come when worthy, strong, and independent women will take over the world. I believe in women’s strength and talents without male oppression. Not only is this world ready for such women, it needs them. I will be one of them, you will see!”

“Yea, I see. In the meantime, can you pass me that peppermill? Thank you, my powerful woman,” Elly wouldn’t stop teasing.

“You can laugh all you want!”

“I hope you’re not gonna take part in protests?” Elly asked, having almost choked on her truffle sauce.

“Are you insane? I am trying to make a point here. Can you hear yourself? I am talking about the importance of life priorities! But if you insist, I would take part in something like that, if it will be needed!”

“I am just messing with you! You know stuff they write about in the media this days. Nutcases. I am really scared,” she rolled her eyes. “By the way, Rosa literally made me read “The Catcher in the Rye” and guess what? Having read it, I actually liked it but only because of just one thing… have you read it?

“No”

“Well, it’s more like for teens. It’s about this kid who decides to rebel… Go against his family rules, because he had this life realization, a shock. I won’t spoil it for you, though. You have to read it. But here’s what I really liked and I think that is the point the author was trying to make. Well, so this kid’s friend gives him a very powerful idea.”

“What idea?”

“Well, he basically says that an immature man is that one who wants to die for a right cause, and a mature man will accept and live for a right cause.”

“So deep, but what’s it got to do with me? I was talking about the power of women. In other words, my dear Elly, a day will come and you will see how we girls can work and make enough money to buy Chanel and Bentley!

She listened carefully and then asked with a hint of sarcasm.

“Well, let me know where to apply for a job like that? You may be surprised, but I personally wouldn’t mind working to afford Chanel and Bentley without having to date some daddy’s boy.”

In the moments like this I always found myself stunned at how prudent and mercantile my friend could at times be, and a clinical way she could talk about certain things.

“I can’t produce an answer right now, you know. I don’t really know what to say to this. At least, not yet. I need more time to find myself. I’m sure the day will come soon.”

“What exactly? Find yourself or a million bucks inside a Bentley on the way to a Chanel boutique?” Elly asked, getting her fork in my spaghetti aglio olio – one of the nasty habits of hers, getting into people’s plates. I was glad it probably happened to be her only flaw.

“The day when I am completely independent,” I replied. “Just remember this. The worst thing that can happen to you in life is you finding yourself dependent on someone.”

“If it’s your dad, it ain’t that bad, huh?” Elly sang and winked. “Oh, this is so yummy!”

“Trust me, whether it’s your dad or some random dude, it’s all the same – horrible.”

“I wouldn’t know. I ain’t got a father like that, or some man….,” Elly said and then added, rolling her eyes: “…unfortunately,” She always rolled her eyes whether the situation asked for it or not. It took me a while to get used to it, but initially it was super annoying. Well, I guess that was her other flaw, come to think. Well, as they say, nobody’s perfect.

“Unfortunately?! Maybe… you’re lucky. It’s not like you’re poor and starving to death.”

“Of course not. Not with mom and Rosa,” she always called her granny by her name – those were family ways. “In fact, I am quite content. Everything is pretty good. Knock on the wood,” she gently knocked on the wooden table top, “…but to be honest, I wouldn’t mind someone taking care of those little problems that we do have.”

“You’ve no idea what you’re saying. Imagine you get married to one of those idiots you hang out with….”

“Who?”

“What? Are you serious? Not even denying! You practically agreed they’re all idiots!”

“Of course, I am not stupid. I am a realist. Having said that, I place my confidence in my genetics, the children will take all the best from me, trust me on that one.”

“What if they don’t?”

“What if… what if my aunt had nuts? She’d be my uncle!”

“I see. You’re hopelessly lost to society.”

“Don’t exaggerate. What do you suggest? That I, with my looks and status, work as a manager at some cosmetic store?” Elly’s face winced at the idea.

“It doesn’t have to be this way. Even if you decided to work at a cosmetic store, with a brain like yours you could be as successful as Liliane Bettencourt or even Kylie!”

“Easy for you to talk about it, looking at the grey reality of this world from inside your black Mercedes, or about careers like Bettencourt, who if I’m not mistaken got it passed down to her from her father. Trust me babe, everything is much simpler than that – men rule this world, and thank God, half of them are still straight. And as you may already know, every head needs a neck.”

“Perhaps you’re right. but those fans of yours are nothing but sons of those heads. Thus, I can’t even begin to comprehend what body part they actually are. I seriously doubt you can be their neck though…”

“You’re so…. bad. You know what? You need to learn how to be honest in a nicer way. Or maybe even learn how to keep your mouth shut. Otherwise, it might be challenging for us to get you married.”

“I don’t want to get married. I’d rather be single than with some pathetic guys…. that kind that follows you everywhere.”

“Who are you talking about in concrete?”

“I don’t even know who to pick from all of them. They’re all the same. Honestly. Neither on the outside, nor inside – all shallow. The only solution they know to any problem is their dads.”

“What do you want from me?”

“I want you to finally start appreciating yourself. For starters. And secondly, I want you to spread me the trouble of having to hang out with them, or join them for dinners. I can’t even find another word that would fit their description, other than idiots. I can’t even eat in front of them, they spoil my appetite.”

“That will keep you in shape. For free.”

“Do I look like I’m a free rider? If you noticed, I never even order anything when one of those idiots invites us to eat out. I’d rather pay for you…,” this time it was me who rolled my eyes and laugh, “…of course, if you don’t order Dom Perignon. If anything happens, all those guys won’t be able to eat at McDonalds without their dads, and you know it!”

“There’s a family behind each of them. That’s why I doubt there will ever be a need to work at a McDonalds. Trust me.”

“Even worse. It’s like you’re marrying an entire family!”

“That’s the way it’s always been. Read any classic novel.”

“I don’t know what books you’re talking about. Maybe, some perverted novels. I always read the other kind. But if you’re O.K. with that, go ahead, it’s your life. I have no right to judge. But remember you will have to bend over and get out of your way to please the whole family, find all their skeletons they hide in the closet, and wash their dirty laundry. Do you really need it?”

“You’re taking it too seriously. For real, you know what they say? Take yourself seriously, but life easy. Or was it the other way around?” Elly laughed.

“Nonsense.”

“Don’t worry…,” Elly said and placed her hand on top of mine. With a serious face, she added, “…some of them have very handsome dads.”

“You’ve got to be kidding!” My jaw dropped when I heard her say these words. With her index finger she touched my chin as if forcing me to close my mouth, wide open with surprise.

“Elly, I thought nothing will surprise me about you after that night at Mario’s

“I know, right? I am unpredictable. And you Eva, are really cute. Seriously. Don’t ever change. Chicks like you are hard to come by. And Eva, honestly, please forget that night.”

“Whatever. If you want to live with those idiots, be my guest. Don’t tell me then, I haven’t warned you.”

The car suddenly stopped, having pulled up in front of Elly’s building. Sasha turned on the hazard lights.

“Looks like you were wrong, Eva. There she is, smoking. Seems like she’s been waiting for a while – half way done with her pack of cigarette,” the driver said sarcastically.

“I can’t believe it!” Eva agreed with a surprise in her voice. “Something must have happened.”

“You said five minutes. I’ve been here for half an hour!” Elly seemed crushed, as she opened the door and got into the car. “Hello there, Sasha”, she snapped without even looking at the driver. Their hostility was mutual for what seemed to be no apparent reason.

“I was sure you’d take forever!” Having exchanged kisses, Eva looked at her friend in disbelieve. “You really didn’t put any makeup!”

“Look at you, all suspicious. What is it, don’t you trust your best friend?”

“Well, it’s just so not like you…”

“You won’t believe what just happened…,” Elly mumbled, frantically looking for something in her purse.

Elly wore jeans, a white wife beater t-shirt with no bra underneath. “Probably intentionally.,” Eva thought as she assessed her friend’s outfit that noticeable flattered her naturally beautiful breasts. She had a light-grey cardigan and boots same color. Her beautiful hair was let down and fell on her feminine shoulders. Elly possessed that kind of natural beauty that complemented and enhanced the clothing, and not the other way around.