The Mighty Quinns: Dylan

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“There are few unbreakable rules regarding scheduling. First, there has to be at least four days between the time you accept a date and the time you go out on a date. If you accept a date for the same day, you’ll appear too eager.”

“All right,” Meggie said. “What else?”

“When he calls, you have to wait at least a full day to call him back. And you can only call him once. If he’s busy or he’s not home, you don’t call again.”

Meggie nodded. This didn’t seem difficult. It was all about what she couldn’t do, not what she had to do. “Rule number three?” Meggie asked.

“On your first three dates, he can’t pick you up at the house. You have to keep it casual. You’ll meet him there, you’ll be polite and gracious, and you’ll call an end to the date at least an hour before you really want to.”

She stepped back from the counter and frowned. “And this is supposed to make him fall in love with me? If I were him I’d slap me silly and leave with the next woman who walked out of the ladies’ room.”

“Think about it,” Lana said. “This is the sex that invented the lost cause. Every man wants to be either a professional baseball player, a photographer for Playboy or the next lotto winner. Even if they can’t hit a ball, operate a camera or don’t bother to buy lottery tickets. It’s part of their nature to want things they can’t have.”

“Is that it?”

“Then there are the kissing rules,” Lana said. “No good-night kiss on the first date, a kiss on the cheek for the second date, and lips, no tongue, on the third.”

“He’ll think I’m prissy,” Meggie said.

“This is all basic economics, Meggie, supply and demand. The less you supply, the more he’ll demand. You have to give him just enough to keep him coming back for more. He’ll think you’re mysterious and unattainable and he’ll try even harder.”

“This seems a little manipulative.”

“Of course it’s manipulative,” Lana said. “The great thing is that men are so easy to manipulate.”

“I’m not sure I can do that,” Meggie murmured.

Lana scoffed then glanced around the shop. “Look around you. What we do at Cuppa Joe’s is manipulative. We sell the best-smelling product on earth, we tempt people with special blends and fancy recipes. But basically we’re selling them legal stimulants made with almost one-hundred-percent water at a seven-hundred-percent markup. When you have a good marketing plan, you can’t go wrong.”

Meggie considered the notion. It was a good plan and with any other woman, it might just work. But she’d never been a smooth operator with men. If she had to remember charts and diagrams and rules and regulations, she might just pass out from the effort. “It’s too complicated,” she said.

“We’ll use my planning software to make a flowchart,” Lana said. “Then you’ll just have to remember one step at a time.”

Meggie considered her options for a long moment. If she could pull this off, then she’d never have to think about Dylan Quinn again. And maybe she’d learn something. She hadn’t had much luck with men up to this point. And the men in Lana’s life seemed to multiply like rabbits. If anything, this was good practice. Why not just brush aside her reservations and go for it? “All right,” she said.

Lana smiled and wrapped her arm around Meggie’s shoulders, giving her a reassuring hug. “This will be fun. I’m bored with my own love life. It’ll be interesting to run yours for a while. Now the only thing we have to do is pray that he stops in again. You’re Catholic. Maybe you can go light a few candles.”

“That’s not what candles are for,” Meggie said. “I can just call him and—”

“Nope,” Lana said, shaking her head.

“I could walk past the firehouse and just casually—”

“Nope,” Lana repeated.

“How is this going to work if he doesn’t call me again?”

Lana sighed. “It won’t work if he doesn’t call you again. And it definitely won’t work if you contact him first. So we just have to wait.”

Just then, the phone rang and as Meggie studied the list of rules, Lana reached for the cordless. “Cuppa Joe’s,” she said. “The best beans in Boston.”