Promised to the Crusader

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‘Now your love must be stronger,’ Anne said. ‘You must fight not only for his love, but for his soul. Restore him to his faith and he will be the man you love again. His physical scars may remain, but they will fade and are as nothing to the loss of his soul.’

‘How wise you are,’ Elaine said and smiled at her. ‘I must wait and see what time will do.’

‘As we all must. Now I must go, for my brother needs me to order his house when we have guests. A servant will come to bring food and drink.’

‘I am simply tired,’ Elaine said. ‘I shall sleep well this night, for I know we are safe. Even the Earl of Newark dare not attack the King’s Marshal.’

‘Not here in this stronghold for we are too well protected, but he might if he found us unprotected—that man is more evil than you know. I think there is little he would not dare.’

‘I know well of his misdeeds,’ Elaine said. ‘My serving woman had a sister and she was sent to serve the Earl of Newark’s first wife. When that gentle lady died at her vile husband’s hands, because she gave him a daughter and not the son he craved, she ran away. I found a place for her with my aunt so that she could be close to her sister—but I do not know what happened to her when my uncle was tricked into surrendering the keep.’

‘Then you must take great care—Newark is a vengeful man. Sleep now, lady, and I shall wake you in the morning to break your fast in good time, though your journey should be safer now, for my brother will send an escort with you. If Newark defies them, he will bring the King’s wrath on himself.’

‘Thank you.’ Elaine sighed as Anne went out and lay down, closing her eyes.

‘Zander,’ she whispered, tears upon her cheeks as she drifted into sleep. ‘Zander, please come back to me…’

Chapter Five

Zander stood in the shadows of the room. The slitted window allowed little light into the lady’s chamber, but his eyes were accustomed to the gloom and what light there was fell across her pale face. He had risen before cockcrow to prepare for the next day of their journey and Anne Stornway was already about her business, ordering her servants. She’d told him that Elaine was sleeping and advised leaving her to rest until the last moment.

‘She has suffered a terrible shock and it is as much grief as the strain of riding so far that made her give way last night, sir. You should be gentle with her.’

‘I am but a rough knight, not a courtier,’ Zander said. ‘You do not need to tell me that I am unworthy of her.’

‘What do court manners matter where love is?’ Anne asked, her head up. ‘I do not boast when I say that more nobles than you may imagine have courted me. Only one hath touched my heart, but he died. If I had found another man I counted as true and honourable, I would have wed him, but I have not.’

‘I am sorry for your loss, lady. You would make any man a fine wife, but I dare say your brother could not spare you.’

‘He would be pleased to see me happy,’ she said. ‘I’ve hoped that he would fall in love and bring his bride here to bear me company, but he is as hard to please as his sister.’

Zander laughed. ‘I think Philip hath too much comfort for his own good, lady. Why should he wed when he has you?’

‘I have my uses,’ she said. ‘Once again I offer my cure. It would ease your pain and the redness.’ There was something almost urgent in her tone, as if she wished to force acceptance from him.

‘I thank you, but I prefer to leave such things to my servant.’

‘Very well. Leave your lady to sleep a little longer.’ Anne turned aside, but he caught the flicker of resentment in her eyes and wondered at it.

Zander inclined his head as she went about her work, but he had not been able to resist coming to Elaine’s chamber to look at her. Now that her lovely hair was spread upon the pillows she looked more like the girl he’d loved, though her skin still bore traces of the stain she’d used to disguise herself. She was so beautiful that his heart caught and he longed to sweep her into his arms and kiss her, to feel her soft skin against his and to make her his own—but that could never happen now.

It would be unfair to her. He was not the man she’d loved. War had hardened him, made him bitter. He would hurt her and she might be left a widow before she was hardly a wife. Zander could never break the vow he’d made to avenge his father. In his heart he knew that the enemy he faced was treacherous and so powerful that even he might not survive the fierce fight that must ensue.

Zander was determined to challenge his enemy to single-handed combat, but first he must regain his strength. Janvier had made him more of the cure with the herbs Elaine had given them and, again, Zander felt an improvement. He was not so easily tired and yet still he could not swing his great broadsword with the strength he would need for battle. Much as he wanted to destroy his enemy, he was not yet ready.

Elaine was stirring. He was torn between leaving her and yet he stayed, wanting to see her wake. Her eyelids flickered and he noticed how dark her lashes were despite the fairness of her hair, then her eyes opened and she looked at him. the smile of wonder and joy that spread from her eyes over her face cut Zander to the heart; it was the smile he recalled so well, the smile that had helped him through the pain-racked nights, drawing him back from the very mouth of hell. It was her smile that had kept him hanging on by a thread, his spirit almost done, the pain so terrible that his body craved the peace of death—and yet he had lived. He had lived because she lived, and now he would live to serve her if he could.

‘Zander…’ The note of wonder in her voice made him frown. ‘I dreamed of you…but you are here…’

‘I am real, but not as you knew me.’

Elaine sighed and his heart caught with pain as he saw the joy and the wonder drain from her, leaving only sadness and uncertainty.

‘I am sorry to wake you, lady,’ he said. ‘But we should be leaving soon. I have sent scouts on ahead to see if Newark hath taken your manor and lies in wait, hoping to draw you into a trap.’

‘And if he has?’ Elaine was fully awake now, modestly drawing the sheet to her chest as she sat up. ‘I do not know where else to go.’

‘I have little to offer you. I think my father’s manor may be almost a ruin—but Anne would take you back here until I could find somewhere suitable for you to live.’

‘My lands are all I have.’

‘I brought a fortune home, as I promised you, Elaine. If my father’s manor lies in ruin, I shall buy a house worthy of you. One that hath stout walls, a moat and a gate that can be drawn up.’

‘But…’ Elaine blushed. ‘I should not wish to be a burden to you if…’

‘You could never be that,’ he said. ‘I shall leave you to dress, but I pray you come down to the courtyard swiftly, for I would be away.’

He turned and left her, his mind in turmoil. If Newark had stolen all Elaine had, it might be that his only course was to wed her. He knew her pride would forbid her to live on his charity. In that eventuality, she might be left penniless and vulnerable, forced to work as a servant for her bread. Marriage to Zander would then be the better alternative. He would honour and protect her while he lived—and if he died his fortune would be hers. To protect her he would appoint Philip of Stornway as her guardian.

Zander’s heart thudded against his ribs as he went down the twisted stair to the great hall, which was a scene of activity as men prepared to leave with him. Armour and supplies had been loaded onto the packhorses, and knights were already wearing their coats of chainmail beneath their tabards.

Zander saw his squire talking with Lady Anne. She was laughing and talking animatedly, her face alight with interest as she listened to Janvier’s words. Janvier turned his head and saw him; he bowed to the lady and walked towards Zander.

Zander caught the look of annoyance on the lady’s face before it was swiftly hidden and once again he wondered. Why should Anne be angry and yet try to hide it?

He knew that the Saracen’s family was noble, but he was penniless, stripped of his land and much he’d had by marauding knights. What little was left he had given to his mother and sister—all that was left of a once-proud family. He’d refused Zander’s offer of gold for saving his life in favour of becoming his servant, but he was a proud and clever man. By birth and intellect he was the equal of Anne of Stornway, but the colour of his skin and his lack of wealth made him a pauper in a strange land—and not a man her brother would consider fit to be her husband.

What nonsense was he at now? He must have a touch of fever to even think of such things. If the lady could guess at what was in his mind, she would no doubt think herself insulted. Zander smiled sadly. How unfair was life? Would that respect and love were all, but in the world Zander knew pride and prejudice ruled the heart and marriages were made for land, not love.

‘Are you ready to leave, my lord?’

‘We but await my lady,’ Zander said and then something warned him and he turned to look at the stone steps that led to the solar. Elaine had taken him at his word and she was dressed, seemingly ready to continue.

‘You feel able to continue?’ Zander asked as she came towards him.

‘Yes, my lord. I am fully rested. I think we have not so far to go now.’

‘It is but a few hours’ ride from here,’ he said and offered her his hand. Even as she took it, Anne came up with them.

‘If you wished, Lady Elaine could stay until you are sure that rogue has not taken her lands. I should be glad of her company.’ Anne said, smiling at them, no trace now of the resentment he’d glimpsed earlier. ‘You know that you may trust my brother to guard her for you.’

‘I must go with Zander,’ Elaine said, an odd little shiver at her nape. Something told her not to stay here, though these people were clearly Zander’s friends. ‘My people will not be certain they can trust him unless I am there. If they have barred the gates against Newark, they will only open to me.’